Carpetbagging weasel faced smarmy little bitch, Ted Cruz

[Chad Fuck 18,135]

24 minutes ago, Smax said:

 

Gerrymandering and all his constituents care about is owning the libs, keeping their guns and propping up O&G

There's no gerrymandering the state borders.  They are what they are.  

The rest of that is spot on though.  

[Sawbonz 28,222]

What is going on here? Are they alleging someone from the govt is going to restrict people to 2 beers a week?

[The Royal We 3,100]

He's like a shitty WWF performer now. People that eat that shit up should probably wear a helmet when they leave the house every day.

[Smax 3,800]

3 minutes ago, Chad Fuck said:

There's no gerrymandering the state borders.  They are what they are.  

The rest of that is spot on though.  

youre right, wasnt thinking

[The Royal We 3,100]

3 minutes ago, Sawbonz said:

What is going on here? Are they alleging someone from the govt is going to restrict people to 2 beers a week?

The FDA might update their recs to match Canada's 2 drinks/day.

So of course the right wing fear porn machine turns that in to OMG, the radical leftist are only going to let you have 2 beers a day. Nanny State! Loud Noises!!!!!1!!1!!One!

[High Plains Drifter 11,189]

 

FDA recommends only two beers a day, but for Rafael, they recommend two gallons of the hard stuff every day.

 

[Hank Kingsley 21,785]

The only thing cringier than Ted Cruz are the people who vote for him. How fucking embarrassing. 

 

 

[Js1 87,185]

9 minutes ago, Chad Fuck said:

There's no gerrymandering the state borders.  They are what they are.  

The rest of that is spot on though.  

Yes but the state lege and congressional maps are gerrymandered in a way to depress Democrat turnout because you’re either in a district that is 100% going to vote red or blue. No purple districts, no point turning out if you’re a Dem gerrymandered into Wesley Hunt’s district (for example) because your vote won’t matter 

[YGIFS 19,458]

We've exhausted this internal conundrum on many other threads.  But every single day raises the issue.  There are horrible, horrible people...to the tune of 35% of the electorate that want to see their twisted agenda and worst impulses visited upon their state and the rest of its citizens.  I get it.  We all get it.  It's just part of being a society.  The price we pay to be alive, I suppose.  

But what Trump, and Cruz, and MTG, and now Abbott now force us to inflect upon.........is why, God, why?  Why them?  I don't like it, but I get that people are going to go after the vulnerable, the gay, the immigrant, the downtrodden, the sick, the poor, the weak, the brown, the young, the old, the trans, the impuissant.  But why these pieces of shit?  Why pick these vessels of idiocy and shitiness?  Why them?  You can still have your agenda delivered and laws passed and ignorance embraced, but by people with a modicum of charm or intelligence.  

But as Brisket would say, that's the feature...not the bug.  It's because these people are so openly vile, and dumb, and vitriolic, and ignorant---that so many latched on to them so vigorously.  It's only now with millions suffering a decade of reflection do I now see it.  I gotta start paying attention because the next wave is gonna be even worse and I don't even know where to look, let alone what to look for.  Our prize mistake, folks.  

[Bozo_Casanova 26,851]

It's the nature of one-party control to produce the worst results acceptable to the mainstream members of the party. If Texas was a two party state or even narrowly Republican we would have a far less repellent set of electeds. 

Edited August 31, 2023 by Bozo_Casanova

[4th&Five 42,005]

 

[South Austin 53,227]

1 hour ago, Hank Kingsley said:

The only thing cringier than Ted Cruz are the people who vote for him. How fucking embarrassing.

I don't know about that.  Ted is pretty fucking textbook cringy.  He just happens to shower more than many of his voters.

[Js1 87,185]

5 minutes ago, South Austin said:

I don't know about that.  Ted is pretty fucking textbook cringy.  He just happens to shower more than many of his voters.

[YGIFS 19,458]

7 minutes ago, South Austin said:

I don't know about that.  Ted is pretty fucking textbook cringy.  He just happens to shower more than many of his voters.

I'm not gonna ask how you know his shower regiment so in detail.  You'll tell us when you're ready...

[jimmyjazz 47,205]

Ted Cruz is a hard motherfucker.

[PenelopeWitherspoon 19,305]

 

 

[hayden_horn 11,402]

i always love it when non beer drinking politicians get all beer hard. the way he's handling that beer bottle makes it pretty clear he hasn't had a beer outside of a glass recently. if at all. 

[BigOrange1 6,611]

17 hours ago, HenryJames said:

not only is it cringy and performative, but its so fucking clearly rehearsed.   "ok guys, as soon as i say 'kiss my ass' everyone drink your beer in unison.  oh yeah, the guy interviewing me needs to make sure to drink a non-alcoholic beer as well - nevermind that the recommendation to drink 2 beers per week most likely doesn't give a fuck about non-alcoholic beers."

and shiner should sue the fuck out of him for product defamation.

[G650 14,437]

Every time I see this thread come up and look at the title, all I can think is

 

[BigOrange1 6,611]

and you'd think they could have found at least one token hispanic to appear behind him rather than 8 people whose pictures appear when you google "generic white christian conservative."

[DixonHur 11,959]

Oh, Ted

[Longhorn_Fan68 34,106]

1 hour ago, hayden_horn said:

i always love it when non beer drinking politicians get all beer hard. the way he's handling that beer bottle makes it pretty clear he hasn't had a beer outside of a glass recently. if at all. 

what's beer hard? is that the opposite of whiskey dick?

[hayden_horn 11,402]

4 minutes ago, Longhorn_Fan68 said:

what's beer hard? is that the opposite of whiskey dick?

'

iykyk

[Longhorn_Fan68 34,106]

man, I totally forgot about that. lulz

[Macanudo 13,327]

1 hour ago, BigOrange1 said:

 

and shiner should sue the fuck out of him for product defamation.

Why?  Shiner is the Ted Cruz of beer.

[safe sex 12,010]

[Guest]

"I'll give up my leather-braided belt and all knowledge of how to reel like a normal human before I go to two beers a week."

[YGIFS 19,458]

All I can beg, borrow, or steal says the front of Ted's leather braided belt has that 90s style foldover knot deal we all did in high school because the teenager of the guy his wife is now being anally fucked by had theirs tied that way in an instagram stalk.  That's how ted rolls.  or folds.  as it were

[Red Five 41,738]

23 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

Why?  Shiner is the Ted Cruz of beer.

Now wait just a damn minute...

[BigOrange1 6,611]

30 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

Why?  Shiner is the Ted Cruz of beer.

lol it's not my favorite either but i wouldn't want to be anywhere near that sack of shit and his political games.

[C-Man 27,779]

2 hours ago, BigOrange1 said:

not only is it cringy and performative, but its so fucking clearly rehearsed.   "ok guys, as soon as i say 'kiss my ass' everyone drink your beer in unison.  oh yeah, the guy interviewing me needs to make sure to drink a non-alcoholic beer as well - nevermind that the recommendation to drink 2 beers per week most likely doesn't give a fuck about non-alcoholic beers."

and shiner should sue the fuck out of him for product defamation.

But he's been to the "Shiner Brewery" in Shiner, Texas. Sure, Jan (Ted).

[Jiggy-Z 3,509]

1 hour ago, hayden_horn said:

'

iykyk

I've been to Milwaukee. It gets better.

[South Austin 53,227]

1 hour ago, Macanudo said:

Why?  Shiner is the Ted Cruz of beer.

[hayden_horn 11,402]

yall defending shiner beer know you're defending a way of life that stopped existing like a quarter century ago, right? shiner is garbage, and it says a lot about the state of beer in the mid 90s when it was the thing to drink.

[YGIFS 19,458]

Haven't had it a long while, but I thought Shiner Blonde was a pretty good beer.  To keep it on thread topic, "Shiner Blonde" was what a dozen dudes I know called Heidi Cruz's butthole.  Boy would eye...

[Eskimohorn 5,682]

yall defending shiner beer know you're defending a way of life that stopped existing like a quarter century ago, right? shiner is garbage, and it says a lot about the state of beer in the mid 90s when it was the thing to drink.

[G650 14,437]

22 minutes ago, hayden_horn said:

yall defending shiner beer know you're defending a way of life that stopped existing like a quarter century ago, right? shiner is garbage, and it says a lot about the state of beer in the mid 90s when it was the thing to drink.

[South Austin 53,227]

45 minutes ago, hayden_horn said:

yall defending shiner beer know you're defending a way of life that stopped existing like a quarter century ago, right? shiner is garbage, and it says a lot about the state of beer in the mid 90s when it was the thing to drink.

[elfenix 34,752]

6 hours ago, Macanudo said:

Why?  Shiner is the Ted Cruz of beer.

[DigglerontheHoof 21,551]

The only thing more annoying than Cruz are beer and music snobs telling others what's cool to drink and listen to. 

[safe sex 12,010]

At least Shiner is actually from Texas, fucking hell.

[SydneyCarton 49,504]

I haven't been a beer drinker for a hot minute, but if Shiner is now trash, what are the cool beers? Just any local micro brew?

[South Austin 53,227]

1 minute ago, SydneyCarton said:

I haven't been a beer drinker for a hot minute, but if Shiner is now trash, what are the cool beers? Just any local micro brew?

It's either Peterson's Super Hazy Juicy IPA or McDougal's Ultra Oatmeal Cream Porter.

[kevwun 16,438]

I like Shiner Light, but I'm not in to beer snobbery.

[South Austin 53,227]

4 minutes ago, kevwun said:

I like Shiner Light, but I'm not in to beer snobbery.

It's a solid tailgate beer.

[kevwun 16,438]

I think you're supposed to call it a session beer.  Am I doing that right?

[SydneyCarton 49,504]

9 minutes ago, South Austin said:

It's either Peterson's Super Hazy Juicy IPA or McDougal's Ultra Oatmeal Cream Porter.

WHere does peanut butter bourbon fall on this scale?

[South Austin 53,227]

5 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

WHere does peanut butter bourbon fall on this scale?

Only people who drive Tesla's are cool enough for that.

[High Plains Drifter 11,189]

 

Let me get this straight:

Some scientists employed by the federal government studying the health effects of alcohol recommend that you probably should keep it to two beers or less per week, and a god damned senator from the largest red state in the US goes full moronic meltdown and in some kind of performance video claims the libs are going to take away beer while awkwardly "drinking" a beer? Do I have that right?

 

Federal scientists need to recommend senators from red states not shoot themselves in the head.

 

 

 

[jimmyjazz 47,205]

So we have DeSantis and Cruz looking like complete toads drinking beers.  Somehow I doubt Joe Biden would be nearly so uncomfortable.