Criticize your favorite movies

[Parliament 14227]

No movie is absolutely perfect, and no matter how much you love a movie you gotta look past a few things.  For example:

They hadta add a bad guy to Blackhawk Down because apparently movie-watchers can’t appreciate the fact the actual “enemy” was an entire city.  So let’s just have this one guy to hate.

As good as the gun play is in Heat, there are still misses.  Magua shoots Pedro Cerrano with a shotgun, at long range, in a moving car.  lol no.

John Wick 3.  Yeah these guys get shot and take a beating and get right back up.  But Wick gets thrown off the 3rd story and doesn’t die.  K

 

 

 

[UTPhil2006 3801]

They talked an awful lot about something they weren't supposed to talk about 

[Beau Vine 54203]

JOE JACKSON BATTED LEFTY, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!!

[strangulation! 1711]

why did henchmen in jasper missouri wear sportcoats?

[UT_OB1 2213]

Do remaster/updates count?  Han shot first. 

[bschoolprof 6251]

Hooper arrives at the Amity Island docks in a small boat with a duffel bag and is greeted by Ben Gardner. Later, at the docks with the tiger shark, we find out he has a massive yacht there.    

[mdmost 42997]

The Justine plot in Heat wastes too much time. I get it as you need to show Hanna is only driven by what he's pursuing but you could've trimmed that just a bit.

I utterly hate the cab driver portion in Pulp Fiction. 

[Michael Knight 12976]

the Godfather insists upon itself

[Haphap 741]

there were no lambs on that one Jodie Foster movie

[bschoolprof 6251]

Edward Penishands could have had better practical effects.

[Macanudo 12974]

Butt Sluts 4 didn't have enough butts.

[Carl Spackler 3479]

10 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

Butt Sluts 4 didn't have enough butts.

Came here to post the exact same thing, dammit.

[mr. sunshine 2824]

Unlike the book neither the Godfather or II mentions anything about the vaginal reconstruction/tightening surgery that Sonny's mistress had to endure after he and his huge hog were murdered 

[MagicSoccerSpray 1732]

5 hours ago, Parliament said:

Magua shoots Pedro Cerrano with a shotgun, at long range, in a moving car.  lol no

 

They were being shot at by twenty cops, I doubt they were trying to insinuate that Breeden was shot solely by Casals with a shotgun. If we're going to complain about Heat, complain about Barbara Hershey's character, or the decision to cut the hints about Hanna doing coke throughout, while keeping Pacino's manic characterization.

[mdmost 42997]

Barbara Hershey?

The bloodsplatter on Breeden is on the windshield and the driver's window is blown out. I think it's more he's hit by bullets from the M16 which Casals had. Drucker had the shotgun. 

You miscreants need to read Heat 2. 

[billfromlaketravis 11444]

Die Hard. No notes. 

[billfromlaketravis 11444]

1 hour ago, mr. sunshine said:

Unlike the book neither the Godfather or II mentions anything about the vaginal reconstruction/tightening surgery that Sonny's mistress had to endure after he and his huge hog were murdered 

Just finished the book. Sonny’s mistress had a pelvic floor issue which made her vagina huge. Perfect for Sonny to park his hog. 
 

Of course great movie, but the Sicily scenes are boring as hell. Doesn’t get interesting until Apollonia gets blown up. 

[MagicSoccerSpray 1732]

29 minutes ago, mdmost said:

Barbara Hershey?

Diane Venora

[wutang75 440]

the Godfather insists upon itself

Damn - you beat me to it.

[mr. sunshine 2824]

29 minutes ago, billfromlaketravis said:

Just finished the book. Sonny’s mistress had a pelvic floor issue which made her vagina huge. Perfect for Sonny to park his hog. 
 

Of course great movie, but the Sicily scenes are boring as hell. Doesn’t get interesting until Apollonia gets blown up. 

From the Godfather Saga. I think it helps tie the story together

 

[billfromlaketravis 11444]

1 minute ago, mr. sunshine said:

From the Godfather Saga. I think it helps tie the story together

 

Yeah the book has some throw away pages on Vito’s rise in America. Thank God we got Godfather II to flesh that out. 

[Dbeasy 15039]

3 hours ago, Michael Knight said:

the Godfather insists upon itself

I really like the Godfather but some of the scenes just drag on forever.

[Deej 76750]

Stripes.

They are going to let two guys who just finished boot camp without any supervision look after some super secret RV?

[mr. sunshine 2824]

1 hour ago, Deej said:

Stripes.

They are going to let two guys who just finished boot camp without any supervision look after some super secret RV?

Also every enlisted man except Bill Murray gets a crew cut.

Spoiler

Until you realized that genetics had already cursed him with a permanent crew cut. Rock on Bill Murray

 

[veritas aequitas 441]

Josey Wales and Philo Beddoe could have done better than Sondra Locke

[cmontexas 3270]

Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer are obviously terrific in Tombstone, but the pacing of it makes the script feel like it was rewritten many many times.

The Johnny Tyler bit was weird too, although fat Billy Bob is hilarious. He's supposedly badass enough that everyone in Tombstone fears him and is presumably making money off the tables at the Oriental. And Wyatt just beats him up and assumes ownership of the stake. Then he comes back for revenge but gives up immediately and never returns when Doc Holliday makes fun of him

[Iceman 2690]

There's no fucking way Nathan Jessup gives Kaffey his payoff.

Zero chance.

[CurlyDumps 4466]

6 hours ago, billfromlaketravis said:

Die Hard. No notes. 

I attended a Q&A with the writer once (Steve de Souza). He joked about how people have questioned him about various perceived plot holes, but nobody has ever questioned some kinda direct fiber optic line to Japan or something. Can't remember exactly what it is. But there ya go. The one flaw straight from the horse's mouth. 

[futureman 22440]

it always bugged me in the fugitive when gerard shoots at kimball several times at the jail.  kimball has just been to see clive driscoll and realizes he isn’t the killer.  gerard and cosmo and crew have already figured out his gig at the hospital.  the one-armed man idea is in their heads; they went through the amputee files at the hospital looking for criminal records, just like kimball did.  I mean they’re at the jail because they’ve hit on clive driscoll too.  they’ve been introduced to frederick sykes, whom they know is dirty.  gerard clearly is beginning to let it creep into his head that kimball might be innocent.  clearly.  and when they run into each other at the jail gerard takes several attempted kill shots at him.  a man that he knows might be innocent and he’s just going to murder him.  thank god for bulletproof glass.  I see it as an almost insurmountable plot hole that has nearly ruined what may be my favorite movie. 

Edited October 26 by futureman

[elfenix 34221]

somehow indy doesn't drown when they submerge the uboat

[Reynolds Woodcock 4738]

3 hours ago, Iceman said:

There's no fucking way Nathan Jessup gives Kaffey his payoff.

Zero chance.

This is actually a great one. 

[Bama Llama 1450]

1. No Country For Old Men.  Llewellyn Moss, wounded in the obliques I guess, having jumped out a second floor hotel window in El Paso, is limping with his jumbo attache case full of cash down a dark street trying to get away from Anton Chigur, when an kind older man in a pickup truck gives him a ride.  Moss gets in and is just settling in his seat when one of Chigur’s shotgun slugs blasts through the truck back window and takes off half the old man’s head, the truck stalls off to one side, and poor wounded Moss is back on the street.

There is no fucking way Chigur could have been close enough to that truck to have so accurately placed that shot.

2. Fargo.  Gaear Grimsrud (Buscemi’s character Carl Showalter’s chain smoking crime partner played by Peter Stormare) stone cold murdered the state trooper, the young innocent bypassing couple, Jerry Lundegaard’s wife, and Showalter, in a wood chipper, no less.  It’s very Coenesque but still a moral plot hole for him to end up a ward of the state rather that shot between the eyes by Sheriff Margie (she’s such a great lady).

[Underdog 28544]

10 hours ago, Deej said:

Stripes.

They are going to let two guys who just finished boot camp without any supervision look after some super secret RV?

That’s the facts, Jack! 

[Kennythetiger 9374]

6 hours ago, cmontexas said:

Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer are obviously terrific in Tombstone, but the pacing of it makes the script feel like it was rewritten many many times.

The Johnny Tyler bit was weird too, although fat Billy Bob is hilarious. He's supposedly badass enough that everyone in Tombstone fears him and is presumably making money off the tables at the Oriental. And Wyatt just beats him up and assumes ownership of the stake. Then he comes back for revenge but gives up immediately and never returns when Doc Holliday makes fun of him

Wyatt took his shotgun. What was he supposed to do?  

[mdmost 42997]

7 hours ago, elfenix said:

somehow indy doesn't drown when they submerge the uboat

There was a scene that was deleted from the original but shows up in the comic adaptation where it shows Indy clings to the periscope as the U-Boat stays at periscope depth the entire rest of the way since this was before WW2. Spielberg had to cut the scene to say in budget. 

 

[Underdog 28544]

Martin and Ellen Brody were kind of shitty parents if you think about it… 

Kids out in the yahd not too fah from the cah while they slept. 
 

Mike goes swimming unsupervised after cutting himself on swing set while dad goes off to work and mom on swing set  with Sean. 
 

Mike in his boat after Kitner attack while parents are inside drinking. 
 

Mike and friends go in pond unsupervised even though patrols are out for shark near the beach, we know how that ends. Plus, neither go up with Mike to his hospital room. 

[Texzilla58 4731]

17 hours ago, mr. sunshine said:

Unlike the book neither the Godfather or II mentions anything about the vaginal reconstruction/tightening surgery that Sonny's mistress had to endure after he and his huge hog were murdered 

Sonny’s wife was the hottest woman in the movie 

[Texzilla58 4731]

Godfather:  Luca Brazzi is presented as a bumbling strongman not much different than Mongo in Blazing Saddles.  In the book he is a terrifying calculating killer .  
 

Dazed and confused.  Where’s the nudity?

 

Edited October 26 by Texzilla58

[Butch Had Not 2969]

30 minutes ago, Texzilla58 said:

Sonny’s wife was the hottest woman in the movie 

Apalonia gets my vote. 

[mdleast 8289]

His sister kisses him in the second installment

[Surly Bevo 24908]

11 hours ago, futureman said:

it always bugged me in the fugitive when gerard shoots at kimball several times at the jail.  kimball has just been to see clive driscoll and realizes he isn’t the killer.  gerard and cosmo and crew have already figured out his gig at the hospital.  the one-armed man idea is in their heads; they went through the amputee files at the hospital looking for criminal records, just like kimball did.  I mean they’re at the jail because they’ve hit on clive driscoll too.  they’ve been introduced to frederick sykes, whom they know is dirty.  gerard clearly is beginning to let it creep into his head that kimball might be innocent.  clearly.  and when they run into each other at the jail gerard takes several attempted kill shots at him.  a man that he knows might be innocent and he’s just going to murder him.  thank god for bulletproof glass.  I see it as an almost insurmountable plot hole that has nearly ruined what may be my favorite movie. 

[52-80 19140]

titanic was billed as the unsinkable ship which feels like a bit of false advertising

[Whitewater Horn 968]

When Ryan and Mancuso are at periscope depth exchanging Morse messages with Ramius, while trying to keep their intentions from the respective crews, why did they acknowledge with active sonar pings instead of continuing to use the Morse signaling on the scopes? 

[Surly Bevo 24908]

2 minutes ago, Whitewater Horn said:

When Ryan and Mancuso are at periscope depth exchanging Morse messages with Ramius, while trying to keep their intentions from the respective crews, why did they acknowledge with active sonar pings instead of continuing to use the Morse signaling on the scopes? 

Mancuso's morse was rusty and so Ramius was simply acknowledging that he was interested in pics of the playmate of the month.  Serendipity

[rage-a-holic 4370]

On 10/25/2024 at 3:09 PM, bschoolprof said:

Hooper arrives at the Amity Island docks in a small boat with a duffel bag and is greeted by Ben Gardner. Later, at the docks with the tiger shark, we find out he has a massive yacht there.    

Probably didn't see any open dock spots, or just didn't want the hassle and used the dinghy.

[ocugolf 1214]

14 hours ago, elfenix said:

somehow indy doesn't drown when they submerge the uboat

Even better, the movie still would have played out the same if Indiana Jones wasn’t in it 

[Deej 76750]

Pretty sure Division 1 diving won't let you call some random out of the stands to do a triple lindy.

[elfenix 34221]

14 minutes ago, Deej said:

Pretty sure Division 1 diving won't let you call some random out of the stands to do a triple lindy.

aggy would sue

[rage-a-holic 4370]

9 hours ago, ocugolf said:

Even better, the movie still would have played out the same if Indiana Jones wasn’t in it 

a stupid and wrong take that has has already been disproved here and the rest of the intertron

• The nazis were digging in the wrong place with zero success and Hitler was demanding results. There was no guarantee that effort was going to be funded indefinitely. They were absolutely convinced the dig was in the right area; digging a km away in a random direction from their current target would have been idiotic without substantial proof they were in the wrong spot.
• My favorite stupid internet take is "but the nazis would have found Marion/the amulet and found the correct location", conveniently forgetting that the Nazis were looking for Abner....they eventually followed Indy...WHO LED THEM DIRECTLY TO MARION....who the nazis didn't know about and were never, ever gonna find in a BFE Himalayan dive bar.
• All the meddling Indy did caused Beloq to open the Ark early on the island, causing the Ark to end up in a US warehouse. If the nazis had found the Ark and Indy wasn't around to steal it, it was headed straight for Berlin, where Hitler and the nazi high command were gonna open it, melt half of Berlin and no more nazi party....or WWII.  So thanks a lot Indy, you meddling dipshit.

[ocugolf 1214]

5 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

a stupid and wrong take that has has already been disproved here and the rest of the intertron

• The nazis were digging in the wrong place with zero success and Hitler was demanding results. There was no guarantee that effort was going to be funded indefinitely. They were absolutely convinced the dig was in the right area; digging a km away in a random direction from their current target would have been idiotic without substantial proof they were in the wrong spot.
• My favorite stupid internet take is "but the nazis would have found Marion/the amulet and found the correct location", conveniently forgetting that the Nazis were looking for Abner....they eventually followed Indy...WHO LED THEM DIRECTLY TO MARION....who the nazis didn't know about and were never, ever gonna find in a BFE Himalayan dive bar.
• All the meddling Indy did caused Beloq to open the Ark early on the island, causing the Ark to end up in a US warehouse. If the nazis had found the Ark and Indy wasn't around to steal it, it was headed straight for Berlin, where Hitler and the nazi high command were gonna open it, melt half of Berlin and no more nazi party....or WWII.  So thanks a lot Indy, you meddling dipshit.

I literally just was watching the Big Bang Theory yesterday, and they talked about this. Can’t believe they wouldn’t get it right. I’ll show myself to the exit door. lol.