Official Bitch about your Family Thread 2024: Holiday Edition

[Parliament 14327]

2 hours ago, utee94 said:

Love this thread every year, just remembered to check in on it.

I never have anything to contribute because my parents and inlaws are awesome and so is the entire extended family.  But I do enjoy reading all of your horror stories and laughing at all of you less fortunate folks!

 

 

If your family has no black sheep, it means YOU are the black sheep.

[dcbc 14511]

1 hour ago, Jerry Callo said:

Much like @dcbc we host and I take on the lion's share of cooking.  Last week, the in-laws said that they'd bring dessert.  I had my wife send a list of Thanksgiving food items in case anyone wanted to bring a few of the items we aren't preparing.  Pecan pie and pumpkin pie are on the list - I'll be damned if I am leaving dessert up in the air for the in-laws to get right.  Bring whatever dessert you want, but I'm not learning on Thursday that you've decided on an acceptable substitute for pecan and pumpkin pie.

I'm happy to hand off the cooking duties if the person offering is certain to bring a reputable A-game.  Thanksgiving basically is the Super Bowl of cooking, and there's nothing worse than a middling Thanksgiving meal.

[dcbc 14511]

56 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

I thought that several years ago, someone on here or on Shaggy posted a tamale dressing recipe. Was that you?  
I searched and was given three pages of results but no recipes. 

https://www.surlyhorns.com/board/topic/6160-time-to-talk-dressing/?do=findComment&comment=750560

Edited Monday at 06:48 PM by dcbc

[thunderlounge 7943]

2 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

I thought that several years ago, someone on here or on Shaggy posted a tamale dressing recipe. Was that you?  
I searched and was given three pages of results but no recipes. 

It was on shag, yes. 
 

I’ll dig it up for you. 

[Parliament 14327]

I’m not sure if that’s a joke, but it seems like a tamale dressing might taste REAL good.

[thunderlounge 7943]

It's no joke:

 

Ingredients

-2 tablespoons butter, divided
-1/2 medium yellow onion, diced
-2 cloves garlic, minced
-4 cups crumbled cornbread (1/2 of a baked 10-inch skillet)
-1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
-1/2 teaspoon dried sage
-1/4 cup chopped cilantro
-3 jalapeños, seeded and diced
-1 cup frozen corn kernels
-4 ounces pepper Jack, shredded (1 cup)
-6 beef, pork, or chicken tamales, chopped
-2 cups turkey or chicken broth
-Salt
-Black pepper

 

Instructions

Preheat the oven to 350° F.

In a large cast-iron skillet, melt the butter on medium-low heat. Add the onions to the skillet and cook until translucent, about 5 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for 30 more seconds.

Once cooked, remove the skillet from the heat and transfer the cooked onions and garlic to a large bowl. Add to the large bowl the crumbled cornbread, cumin, sage, cilantro, corn kernels, diced jalapeños and pepper Jack cheese. Stir until well combined. Gently stir in the chopped tamales, and return the dressing to the skillet. (Alternatively, you can place the dressing in a greased 9×9 baking dish.)

Pour the chicken broth over the dressing and gently stir to combine. Adjust seasonings and add salt and pepper to taste. Cover the skillet with foil and bake for 45 minutes. Remove the foil and bake for 15 more minutes or until top is lightly browned and the edges are crisp.

 

ETA: @Kennythetiger

Edited yesterday at 12:20 AM by thunderlounge

[MissingInAction 25199]

Just reading that recipe made me shart.

[Kennythetiger 9471]

6 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Just reading that recipe made me shart.

I am thinking about trying it with a prime rib roast for Christmas. 

[hookemATL 11912]

Smaller gathering at the farm this year. No drama ever (sorry to disappoint).
 

I will check on my deer setup, drink Bushmills, take my girls for a hike, and generally just relax with people I love. Food will be wonderful, and my mom will set aside a pipe with a fresh bowl to help set the mood.  If things get crazy, my pops will bust out his vinyl and I’ll sit on the porch and listen to Townes. 

my favorite holiday. 

[Blotto 23580]

Yeah, I'm currently on a flight to Boston to spend a few days at my sister's. I think we have 8 for dinner, but all normal people who get along and will act like normal people.

The only complaint I really have is nobody else really gives a shit about football, but nobody objects if I throw it on. Good food and drink, and I think there's still a few edibles squirreled away from a previous trip up there. Drama free so I live vicariously through this thread 

[BearSchlong 8115]

“Honey, the brine that is simmering on the stove needs to be cold before we submerge the bird.”

I don't have an ice chest big enough to seat my biggest gumbo pot so I hope HEB has 30 lbs of ice. Grateful for my big garage utility sink.

[hookemATL 11912]

41 minutes ago, BearSchlong said:

“Honey, the brine that is simmering on the stove needs to be cold before we submerge the bird.”

“Make sure it’s cooked all the way through!  We don’t want to serve undercooked poultry, dear.”

 

me:

[cactusflinthead 27605]

[GhostOfTomJoad 9356]

If it really hits 86 fucking degrees in Austin tomorrow I'm gonna lose my shit. Fuck this seesaw temperature ride.

[Al_4_ISU 12492]

Gonna be interesting this year, potentially.

Failure to Launch Stoner BIL upped his threats of self harm to the point of being committed this summer.  While it seemed like he started to get on a better track after getting out, he's falling back into his loathing and self pity.  Most of it revolves his belief that he's a friendless loser, which while true, is entirely of his own doing.  He still complains about getting made fun of in high school (he's 33) despite having been a college athlete and a guy that women generally find good looking (until they talk to him and his negativity is an immediate turn off).  We're hosting the in-laws and Friday and he's not coming with, which is just fine by me.  Having to be around his mopey bitching just takes all the life out of a room.  I just hope for my wife and in-laws' sake that he doesn't do anything drastic in the next month (I doubt he will).

Went to my brother's place in St Paul on Sunday (for my mom's side) and going to my old man's tomorrow.  I doubt either one of those will create drama, but my 9 year old nephew is almost always good for a few one liners.  He's starting to get openly horny and my brother has no clue how to address it.  We grew up German Catholic, so anything like that was snuffed out with swift and severe punishment for generations.  My SIL is far more of a gentle parent than mine or (any previous generations were).  So I wouldn't put it past him to reference having a boner at the dinner table.

[GhostOfTomJoad 9356]

Openly Horny 9 YO is a damn strong username for Surly. Who's gonna claim it as their next sock?

[MissingInAction 25199]

[Al_4_ISU 12492]

1 hour ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Openly Horny 9 YO is a damn strong username for Surly. Who's gonna claim it as their next sock?

Last year he said he was just yelling "BOOBS" at the end of sentences.  It was great entertainment.

For me anyways.  I could see my brother's few remaining hairs falling out of his scalp in real time.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21930]

Last night at the ranch was just me, my daughter, my 94 year old mom, and my dogs so it was pleasant.  That all ended this morning when my MAGAT older sister came up.  I’ve already been subjected to rants about how the only President worse than Carter was Biden.  She also made fun of my daughter liking Taylor Swift because if she wasn’t so liberal she could get a man and wouldn’t have to only sing about her break ups.  Also had to listen to rant about Talylor Swift being a bitch for telling my sister that she can’t drive an SUV while she flies around in a private jet.  I’m not sure where the fuck that one came from.  I’m getting reading to take my daughter into town to go to WalMart so we can be around less unpleasant people.

[statsman 5484]

Couple of thoughts:

Edmund Burke: “Rudeness is how the weak try to appear strong.”

statsman: “If drinking isn’t a problem for you, it can be a solution.”

Hang in there. 

[Al Czervik 1231]

15 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

 WalMart so we can be around less unpleasant people.

Good luck with this. 

[Kennythetiger 9471]

4 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Gonna be interesting this year, potentially.

Failure to Launch Stoner BIL upped his threats of self harm to the point of being committed this summer.  While it seemed like he started to get on a better track after getting out, he's falling back into his loathing and self pity.  Most of it revolves his belief that he's a friendless loser, which while true, is entirely of his own doing.  He still complains about getting made fun of in high school (he's 33) despite having been a college athlete and a guy that women generally find good looking (until they talk to him and his negativity is an immediate turn off).  We're hosting the in-laws and Friday and he's not coming with, which is just fine by me.  Having to be around his mopey bitching just takes all the life out of a room.  I just hope for my wife and in-laws' sake that he doesn't do anything drastic in the next month (I doubt he will).

Went to my brother's place in St Paul on Sunday (for my mom's side) and going to my old man's tomorrow.  I doubt either one of those will create drama, but my 9 year old nephew is almost always good for a few one liners.  He's starting to get openly horny and my brother has no clue how to address it.  We grew up German Catholic, so anything like that was snuffed out with swift and severe punishment for generations.  My SIL is far more of a gentle parent than mine or (any previous generations were).  So I wouldn't put it past him to reference having a boner at the dinner table.

We’ve heard about Nephew before, haven’t we?  I will be thinking about you on Saturday- I am really looking forward to sitting on my ass and flipping between Texas/aTm and KSU/ISU. 

[Kennythetiger 9471]

1 hour ago, Al Czervik said:

Good luck with this. 

I think that was the joke. 

[Al_4_ISU 12492]

10 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

We’ve heard about Nephew before, haven’t we?  I will be thinking about you on Saturday- I am really looking forward to sitting on my ass and flipping between Texas/aTm and KSU/ISU. 

Yeah, he’s been appearing in permutations of this thread since he was 4 or 5.  Got plenty of his uncle’s personality.

I’m really nervous about Saturday.  Obviously we have a lot more to play for.  Obviously that don’t make a shit.

[Kennythetiger 9471]

5 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Yeah, he’s been appearing in permutations of this thread since he was 4 or 5.  Got plenty of his uncle’s personality.

I’m really nervous about Saturday.  Obviously we have a lot more to play for.  Obviously that don’t make a shit.

Obviously I hope we play better than we did against Arizona State. 

[4th&Five 41594]

2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Last night at the ranch was just me, my daughter, my 94 year old mom, and my dogs so it was pleasant.  That all ended this morning when my MAGAT older sister came up.  I’ve already been subjected to rants about how the only President worse than Carter was Biden.  She also made fun of my daughter liking Taylor Swift because if she wasn’t so liberal she could get a man and wouldn’t have to only sing about her break ups.  Also had to listen to rant about Talylor Swift being a bitch for telling my sister that she can’t drive an SUV while she flies around in a private jet.  I’m not sure where the fuck that one came from.  I’m getting reading to take my daughter into town to go to WalMart so we can be around less unpleasant people.

[workswithseed 2113]

5 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Last year he said he was just yelling "BOOBS" at the end of sentences.  It was great entertainment.

For me anyways.  I could see my brother's few remaining hairs falling out of his scalp in real time.

 Boobs is a fun word, but tits is the best word.