Official Bitch about your Family Thread 2024: Holiday Edition

[thunderlounge 7,965]

3 hours ago, Wiler77 said:

But that reminds me of this breakfast casserole my wife's family makes, which came from my wife's uncle. Eggs, cheese, breakfast sausage, bread. Combine and bake. Really fucking good.

+rep for breakfast casserole. Love that stuff.

 

 

3 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

It’s in a family partnership

Ok then, next year, talk politics and get shot?

 

[ChickenSandwich 9,856]

14 hours ago, Zepol87 said:

Group text request “if we can have green bean casserole with fresh green beans because it’s healthier.” Gonna be fun tomorrow, I’m in charge of turkey and will be outside watching football all day. 

They were fresh at some point 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,979]

My niece showed up this morning wearing a shirt that says “I’m a Christian.  The love your neighbor kind, not the storm the capital kind”.  This triggered the MAGAT half of the family so we had to hear all about the peaceful demonstration.  I finally just went and sat on the porch and drank coffee with my dog.  We were supposed to eat at 12:30, but it appears that it will be somewhat delayed.

Edited 10 hours ago by NeverMarryAStripper

[Post Oak 20,302]

You're niece woke up and chose violence. Good for her

[ztejas 43,552]

6 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

Happy Thanksgiving assholes! Also, is that @ztejas?

No I've never had Thanksgiving in someone's drop ceiling basement. 

[locodos 5,409]

23 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Last night at the ranch was just me, my daughter, my 94 year old mom, and my dogs so it was pleasant.  That all ended this morning when my MAGAT older sister came up.  I’ve already been subjected to rants about how the only President worse than Carter was Biden.  She also made fun of my daughter liking Taylor Swift because if she wasn’t so liberal she could get a man and wouldn’t have to only sing about her break ups.  Also had to listen to rant about Talylor Swift being a bitch for telling my sister that she can’t drive an SUV while she flies around in a private jet.  I’m not sure where the fuck that one came from.  I’m getting reading to take my daughter into town to go to WalMart so we can be around less unpleasant people.

Losing your keys would be easy to do at a ranch...  very distracting too, worrying about finding your keys, might take up a lot of free time backtracking and checking cushions etc.  Just a thought

[Jerry Callo 8,749]

14 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Reply All: No.

Reply:  and organic mushroom soup and fried onions.

[tx 3 putt 77,596]

my sister is working the ER this am, much higher amount of shootings than normal

keep it classy san antonio 

 

also they had this …

 

[GhostOfTomJoad 9,369]

So much for just a quiet, stress free Thanksgiving for the 2 of us. Mrs GOTJ had a minor procedure the other day that resulted in a couple stitches in a tender place. Then she lost a filling this morning, 3 days after having a cavity filled in a different tooth. She's cranky/uncomfortable and pretty much inconsolable right now. I'm spending as much time as I can pretending to tend the turkey on the smoker while she angrily replies to group texts from her family asking how Thanksgiving is going.

Few things suck worse than being helpless to relieve the pain someone you love is feeling.

[nnm 36,694]

Just now, GhostOfTomJoad said:

So much for just a quiet, stress free Thanksgiving for the 2 of us. Mrs GOTJ had a minor procedure the other day that resulted in a couple stitches in a tender place. Then she lost a filling this morning, 3 days after having a cavity filled in a different tooth. She's cranky/uncomfortable and pretty much inconsolable right now. I'm spending as much time as I can pretending to tend the turkey on the smoker while she angrily replies to group texts from her family asking how Thanksgiving is going.

Few things suck worse than being helpless to relieve the pain someone you love is feeling.

That turkey’s not going to tend itself. 
 

sorry about Mrs. GOTJ. It is hard watching someone you love suffer. 

[hookem2010 2,629]

Had Thanksgiving with the wife and young kids, sister + BIL and parents on Saturday. 

In a shocking moment of clarity, the parents purposely showed up an hour after my sister and BIL, so election venting could be performed in their absence.

The 2 year-old finally interacted significantly with my sister, who I know was feeling insecure about him previously being anywhere from indifferent to fearful of her. The newborn slept basically the entire time. We cooked most of the appetizers and deserts ahead of time, leaving my dad to do the bird while we supervised children. 

Pretty uneventful, other than the turkey setting the fire alarm off twice while my wife struggled to get the toddler down for a nap.

Just the immediate family today. I'm about to go pick up some Peking duck, but currently watching the toddler walk laps around the house using his fake Dyson while working on potty training.

[locodos 5,409]

Getting ready to head into the belly of the beast...  45+ people in a small 3 bedroom.  It's going to be madness, card tables, no assigned seating, and buffet style.  I bitch, but this has become a yearly thing I actually look forward too.  It's just not Thanksgiving until you've snapped a few plastic forks on some bone dry turkey!

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your (apparently) reprobate families!

[Dbeasy 15,134]

Today I learned one of you degenerates is the father in law to my brother in law. I don’t even want to ask him his user name. I don’t think I could deal with that weirdness. 

[luke duke 6,420]

My niece showed up this morning wearing a shirt that says “I’m a Christian.  The love your neighbor kind, not the storm the capital kind”.  This triggered the MAGAT half of the family so we had to hear all about the peaceful demonstration.  I finally just went and sat on the porch and drank coffee with my dog.  We were supposed to eat at 12:30, but it appears that it will be somewhat delayed.

Is this niece 18?

[4th&Five 41,606]

On 11/5/2024 at 4:01 PM, 4th&Five said:

My brother has been in a relationship with a woman for 15+ years that he has kept a secret from all of his friends and family. In February he decided to tell my mom about her but hasn’t addressed it with anyone else…he just showed up at my wife’s birthday lunch with her. Very strange and very awkward so the holidays should be pretty weird. Does she bring her kids and her grandkid to my parent’s house? We’ll see!

This was about as weird as I expected. With her being there we didn’t have enough room at the table so my mom set up her little desk and had my kid’s sit there. The gf made the worst deviled eggs I’ve ever had and we all continued to address how fucking strange the whole situation is. 
The highlight was my dad telling a 10 minute story about a deer impaling itself on his fence and bleeding out in the front yard. Great conversation starter over pie!

[BearSchlong 8,128]

Maybe it is the way they chopped up plantations but all my wife’s cousins in LA have 100 acre lots that are 600’ x 7,260’.

Nothing to bitch about, except that family touch football game kicked my old ass.

[Telegraph_it 3,360]

Flying out to Mason County tomorrow. Everyone should be in a great mood (even more so if the Cowboys win) because of this election. 
 

It’s a frikin trip. On the plus side my wife’s uncle bought a cannon and we are going to fire it… maybe. 

[dcbc 14,544]

21 hours ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

You’re much nicer than me. My mom passed away in ‘10 after 43 years with my Dad. He remarried 7 years ago. I call her by name. No association as I do not care for her.
She does not come over for holidays which is nice.

So, in the end, the plates had been set out on the table, and I didn't realize it.  So when I was about to go through the buffet line, I grabbed a paper plate and didn't look back.  It's a Thanksgiving miracle!  We rented out the clubhouse at the assisted living facility where my mom lives (it's easier that transporting her to our house).  Everything went well with no drama.  Definitely a couple of "cousin walks" with the college age kids.  Best part, minimal cleanup and no house guests.  

[ztejas 43,552]

1 hour ago, Dbeasy said:

Today I learned one of you degenerates is the father in law to my brother in law. I don’t even want to ask him his user name. I don’t think I could deal with that weirdness. 

So... your dad? Did you mean son-in-law?

[BearSchlong 8,128]

Flying out to Mason County tomorrow. Everyone should be in a great mood (even more so if the Cowboys win) because of this election. 
 
It’s a frikin trip. On the plus side my wife’s uncle bought a cannon and we are going to fire it… maybe. 

[luke duke 6,420]

Definitely a couple of "cousin walks" with the college age kids.

[Parliament 14,351]

Friggen’ Midwest Goodbye.  I’m never gonna get outta here.

[Celery Man 21,012]

lol Louisiana cousins of my wife have a baby bottle with Coca Cola in it for the 18 month old

[SizzleChest 8,284]

4 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

lol Louisiana cousins of my wife have a baby bottle with Coca Cola in it for the 18 month old

 ‘beetus acquisition: engaged.

[Telegraph_it 3,360]

24 minutes ago, BearSchlong said:

This is probably a little less refined. We got canister or grape shot and a solid shot to fire, apparently.

In my opinion, we need a chain shot, or it’s not worth watching. 

[hookemATL 11,937]

1 hour ago, Celery Man said:

lol Louisiana cousins of my wife have a baby bottle with Coca Cola in it for the 18 month old

Child abuse, Cajun style!

[Nivek 16,997]

At in-laws. My MIL’s brother starts pivoting from my wife pouring a tequila to how Trump and the president of Mexico said they won’t engage in a tariff battle. Then he starts questioning her lineage as she doesn’t look Mexican. And the MIL is trying to mention to him that she is Mexican. He keeps bantering how she looks Scandinavian, my FIL and I are chuckling, then he interrupts everyone for a toast.

[Biff Tannen 45,751]

5 minutes ago, Nivek said:

At in-laws. My MIL’s brother starts pivoting from my wife pouring a tequila to how Trump and the president of Mexico said they won’t engage in a tariff battle. Then he starts questioning her lineage as she doesn’t look Mexican. And the MIL is trying to mention to him that she is Mexican. He keeps bantering how she looks Scandinavian, my FIL and I are chuckling, then he interrupts everyone for a toast.

JFC

[SurlyGator 883]

2 hours ago, ztejas said:

So... your dad? Did you mean son-in-law?

Yeah, we're going to need a clarification on this one.  All these branches make a circle.

[thunderlounge 7,965]

Cue the banjoes. 

[ztejas 43,552]

2 hours ago, Telegraph_it said:

In my opinion, we need a chain shot, or it’s not worth watching. 

What could go wrong?

[tx 3 putt 77,596]

9 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

My niece showed up this morning wearing a shirt that says “I’m a Christian.  The love your neighbor kind, not the storm the capital kind”.  This triggered the MAGAT half of the family so we had to hear all about the peaceful demonstration.  I finally just went and sat on the porch and drank coffee with my dog.  We were supposed to eat at 12:30, but it appears that it will be somewhat delayed.

 

im looking to settle down, she sounds like my type

 

 

Edited 1 hour ago by tx 3 putt