Terrible White People Baby Names

[Bigpoppapump 529]

On 8/15/2018 at 8:28 AM, Prepuce of Doom said:

"Gambit" is an interesting move. 

Gonna be hard to not be a badass with that name.  Hatas gonna hate.

[PittsburghTiger 6,175]

15 hours ago, CHIEF said:

My first cousin's first cousin (opposite side of the family) was named Zebulon William Williams. Was close enough to attend his funeral a couple of years ago, died from a heroin overdose in Cleburne, Texas. Daughter picked the music for the funeral and played Guns and Roses' Mister Brownstone, I shit you not. 

 

CHIEF

That was the name of Grandpa Walton, on The Waltons.

[Nivek 16,918]

Today's upper crust names, are tomorrows lower class names and future stripper names.  

I wanted William, Henry, and considered Waylon for my off-the-wall name.   Settled for Ryan

[Stoogey 219]

On 8/16/2018 at 9:47 PM, Stella Link said:

No.  Strippers will always be named Brandy, Crystal, Tiffany, Amber, Candy, Cherry, Bambi, Star, Diamond, Lexie, Roxy, Chyna and Trixie.

How did Bambi evolve from The Prince Of The Forest to a stripper name?


 

[Pancho 44,703]

 

[Gil Bang 25,912]

I fucking hate white people

 

[Hefeweizen 5,310]

Ray gun is pretty awesome, not going to lie.

 

Schwetty balls galore.

[Wilcox Cummingtonite 2,937]

Bayleigh, Kayleigh, Amberleigh will make wonderful strippers I bet.

[Texaus 377]

3 minutes ago, Hefeweizen said:

Ray gun is pretty awesome, not going to lie.

 

Schwetty balls galore.

Raygun is one of my favorite snowboards. It’s a cheap beginner’s board, but I like it and still go back to it pretty often.

[rage-a-holic 4,377]

My brother just had his 1st kid and named him....Colton.

I want to send him links to the Colton Pitonyak story so bad.

[YGIFS 19,449]

Cutter Sagers?  

Cash me Outside, Cash.  No Sweat, Bitch.  

Bronc Heiener

TIL, the simulation doesn't become self-aware as SkyNet at NORAD.  It first infiltrates the Utah State children's rodeo first as a beta-test. 

[boilerhorn 1,373]

It’s not just white, it’s Utah white.  Bordering on the whitest of white (clear?).  Most of these folks are likely LDS.  I work with and have many LDS friends.  My generation is filled with Dan, Brent, etc.  Our kids’ generation (20-30) veered a little more: Mason, Tanner, Lindsay.  This is yet another step.  That said, there are Cutters, Kaylans, etc. at many of the private schools in suburban Texas.

I am a bit offended by Qwaylon.  Just name the kid Waylon, FFS.

[atomheartbevo 89,626]

42 minutes ago, boilerhorn said:

I am a bit offended by Qwaylon.  Just name the kid Waylon, FFS.

[royiv 9,247]

Nevaeh is a very popular name in the NICUs of Utah and Idaho.

[elfenix 34,223]

Jaydin. 

 

https://youtu.be/44Os7PeQ-q8?si=yHrDnVlVDXP-6x3X

[Hefeweizen 5,310]

The “den” ending is a white giveaway, phonetically.  Caden, Braden, Hayden, ad nauseum.  When my kids were at Westlake there was a lot of this.  It’s fucking weird.

[Incredulity 11,650]

Give it 50 years and Michael, Robert, Steve and David will be bleeding edge trends.

[4th&Five 41,506]

Saw this yesterday:

 

[CHIEF 5,076]

On 7/20/2024 at 10:05 PM, royiv said:

Nevaeh is a very popular name in the NICUs of Utah and Idaho.

How is that spoken phonetically? Nev-ah-ee-ya?

CHIEF

[TheBryMan81 2,508]

2 hours ago, CHIEF said:

How is that spoken phonetically? Nev-ah-ee-ya?

CHIEF

I have a niece named Neveah (Hispanic, not white, surprisingly,  I know). Phonetically, she is Neh-vay-yah.

[KYHorn 17,014]

3 hours ago, TheBryMan81 said:

I have a niece named Neveah (Hispanic, not white, surprisingly,  I know). Phonetically, she is Neh-vay-yah.

I've known a few black people named Nevaeh (note: heaven backward). This is how they pronounced it as well

[Nivek 16,918]

I had Waylon in my list but it didn’t fit when we looked at them.

[Brisketexan 105,060]

On 7/20/2024 at 10:16 PM, Hefeweizen said:

The “den” ending is a white giveaway, phonetically.  Caden, Braden, Hayden, ad nauseum.  When my kids were at Westlake there was a lot of this.  It’s fucking weird.

Hayden, Braden, Caden, and Okayden.

[Gatorubet 30,185]

27 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Hayden, Braden, Caden, and Okayden.

Moon Unit…

[Braff Zacklin 13,552]

Don't be a Dweezil.

[Brisketexan 105,060]

3 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

Moon Unit…

I mean.....I'd have a drink or two with her today for sure.

[Deej 76,754]

On 7/20/2024 at 9:04 PM, rage-a-holic said:

My brother just had his 1st kid and named him....Colton.

I want to send him links to the Colton Pitonyak story so bad.

[TheStoicPaisano 9,922]

On 7/21/2024 at 9:10 AM, 4th&Five said:

Saw this yesterday:

 

I feel like these words are out of order, Yoda-like.

Way too many wannabe Bond villain names on that rodeo list. They’re no Wint & Kidd.

Edited July 22 by TheStoicPaisano

[ztejas 43,411]

On 7/20/2024 at 10:16 PM, Hefeweizen said:

The “den” ending is a white giveaway, phonetically.  Caden, Braden, Hayden, ad nauseum.  When my kids were at Westlake there was a lot of this.  It’s fucking weird.

Lol wut. Do you know how many black kids get named Jaden/Jayden?

[Spaulding Smails 1,552]

I knew two brothers in middle school.  Their dad loved the outdoors and so did they. 

Wade Mann and Bo Mann

Solid, normal names.  Until you threw in their middle names.

Wade Fisher Mann

Bo Hunter Mann

[Macanudo 12,975]

I have a family member expecting this summer.  The kid's middle name will be Emit.  Not pronounced like Emmett Smith.  But long E-mit as in "to send out a beam, noise, smell or gas. "

I'm going to call the kid Fart.

Edited July 22 by Macanudo

[Prepuce of Doom 21,053]

2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Hayden, Braden, Caden, and Okayden.

With a middle name of "Let's get our roll on!", naturally. 

[Covri 6,244]

Wife sent me one today I’ve never seen before, “Juzdify” 😂

[Samson's Wig 3,191]

On 8/22/2018 at 1:20 AM, Stoogey said:

How did Bambi evolve from The Prince Of The Forest to a stripper name?


 

Strippers, unresolved childhood trauma, daddy issues.  There must be a connection here somewhere.

[Jerry Callo 8,698]

24 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

With a middle name of "Let's get our roll on!", naturally. 

We also would have accepted Skoden.

[66BUFF 2,562]

On 8/22/2018 at 1:20 AM, Stoogey said:

How did Bambi evolve from The Prince Of The Forest to a stripper name?


 

[jdhorn92 1,545]

we have a friend who has a son(10 or so) named Robert , goes by Rob.  Every time he's over I feel like we should be talking out  401K's.  Dont see too many 10 year olds these days named Rob.

[Beau Vine 54,207]

5 hours ago, ztejas said:

Lol wut. Do you know how many black kids get named Jaden/Jayden?

All of them?

[Earl Haffler 590]

Scooter, Bubba, Buddy, Buck, Champ, Buffy, Bambi, Bunny, Daisy,Trixie

[IDIOTsavant 8,483]

Played peewee football with a kid named Tuck Wheeler 30-some odd years ago. How he didn’t become a rodeo star I’ll never know….or a drag queen.

Edited July 23 by IDIOTsavant

[mininghorn88 2,277]

There was a professor at UT in the School of Architecture back in the ‘80s whose name was Richard Swallow. He went by Dick.

[Lhorn 4,909]

Cash with a “C” and Kash with a “K” is the new Cathy “C”, Kathy “K.”

Edited July 23 by Lhorn