Trivial things that please the ever living shit out of you

[DougO 5257]

Actually making some progress on a project for a change.

[SHOOTER12 8852]

Laying back in my leather recliner at 1 a.m. with my ten month old grandchild sleeping on my chest, listening to the sweet little cooing snoring sounds she makes.

Where in the hell did 10 year old come from?... fixed.

Edited March 17, 2019 by SHOOTER12

[BladeRunnerRock 33]

When your grandson,who just turned 2 in December, begs to go outside and hit baseballs at 9pm and it's 45 degrees  

(Beats the hell out of going on the other thread and whining about Daylight savings time.)

[Jersey Man10 3661]

When I turn on the radio and a song that I like just started.

[HornsOverIthaca 2339]

When you have an ass itch, but you blast out a voluminous fart and it solves it.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

On 3/16/2019 at 5:48 PM, Underdog said:

How many envelopes a day do you have to lick in order to make some decent scratch?

You laugh but I actually just started working from home about a month ago, and I'll never go back. This is awesome. I have direct reports from Oregon to Maine, and I don't have to smell a single one of them (though, admittedly, now that none of them are aggy, that wouldn't be as bad as it's been for the last 15 years...)

[Kennythetiger 9497]

We've had a cold, miserable winter.  This morning when I went to work the air was warm and the robins were singing.  

[Shoxthemonkey 1983]

Greens and fairways are starting to show a little green growth.

[El Diablo 4232]

3 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

We've had a cold, miserable winter.  This morning when I went to work the air was warm and the robins were singing.  

Birds in the morning are a welcome sound for sure.

[NeverMarryAStripper 22030]

3 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Greens and fairways are starting to show a little green growth.

Time for your wife to break out the trimmer then

[happyfunball 481]

Delete

[EE2B 1565]

Busting a Snapple bottle on someone’s car who had the nerve to blow their horn at me while I was crossing the street. He jumped out of his car, but I flexed on him and he hauled ass!

[BayouBill 835]

When your wife tells you to sit down we need to talk, right after you get home from a work trip and you're thinking, "great what the hell did I do wrong", and then she pulls out a positive pregnancy test. This in turn makes you lose all control and start ugly crying like I didn't think I had in me because you had been trying for YEARS. 

This happened 2 months ago. 14 weeks tomorrow.

Not Trivial, don't care. Got dusty just typing that.

[NeverMarryAStripper 22030]

36 minutes ago, EE2B said:

Busting a Snapple bottle on someone’s car who had the nerve to blow their horn at me while I was crossing the street. He jumped out of his car, but I flexed on him and he hauled ass!

Snapple bottles are plastic now

35 minutes ago, BayouBill said:

When your wife tells you to sit down we need to talk, right after you get home from a work trip and you're thinking, "great what the hell did I do wrong", and then she pulls out a positive pregnancy test.

How long were you gone on your trip?

[Guest]

when you do a google search for the house you are buying and it is no longer available on the real estate sites...

 

Now we just need to sell the one we're living in, LOL.  

[MNLonghornFUKM 8916]

When your wife tells you to sit down we need to talk, right after you get home from a work trip and you're thinking, "great what the hell did I do wrong", and then she pulls out a positive pregnancy test. This in turn makes you lose all control and start ugly crying like I didn't think I had in me because you had been trying for YEARS. 
This happened 2 months ago. 14 weeks tomorrow.
Not Trivial, don't care. Got dusty just typing that.

Congrats.

[Asithappens 974]

Having both of my kids get into UT on their own as true freshman.

And yes, I know that's not trivial.

[luke duke 6420]

Was there a tennis scholarship involved?

[Guest]

17 hours ago, Asithappens said:

Having both of my kids get into UT on their own as true freshman.

And yes, I know that's not trivial.

Congratulations on not redshirting...

[mycox 582]

The smell of the tires when shopping for new tires, and the smell of cedar in the hardware store.

[lateshow 1309]

44 minutes ago, mycox said:

The smell of the tires when shopping for new tires, and the smell of cedar in the hardware store.

Yes sir. Intoxicating. 

[elfenix 34385]

[CHIEF 5098]

On 3/19/2019 at 7:07 AM, Shoxthemonkey said:

Greens and fairways are starting to show a little green growth.

 

Yup.

 

CHIEF

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

Fava beans are blooming.

[NeverMarryAStripper 22030]

My dryer quit heating yesterday, so I spent today looking on the internet about how to test the heating element and the thermostat and how to replace them.  Then I read this on some repair site:

An electric dryer may run with a partial voltage of 110 volts, but it will not heat unless it has 208/240V, 30 amps. The circuit breaker could have partially tripped, even if it does not look as though it has. Turn off the breaker to the dryer and turn it back on to restore full power. Check the circuit breaker/fuses.

Bingo, that was my problem.  This pleased me greatly, at least until some underlying problem comes up.

[Kennythetiger 9497]

My local grocery store has started selling large canisters of red pepper flakes.  Has replaced Louisiana Hot Sauce on the majority of my meals.  

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

22 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

My local grocery store has started selling large canisters of red pepper flakes.  Has replaced Louisiana Hot Sauce on the majority of my meals.  

We buy in bulk. Red pepper flakes go on anything and everything. Hell, I'd probably put 'em in my oatmeal, if I ever ate oatmeal.

[Longboard Horn 40890]

When a coworker who was trying to throw you and everyone else under the bus constantly ends up getting fired.

[Llano Estacado 1257]

Fava beans are blooming.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

12 minutes ago, Llano Estacado said:

 

[66BUFF 2576]

Census takers beware

[Underdog 28870]

Well shit, now I want a Luanne platter of liver & onions, mashed potatoes, mac n cheese, pecan pie, tea and a roll from Luby’s. 

[elfenix 34385]

On 3/22/2019 at 2:40 PM, Walden Ponderer said:

Fava beans are blooming.

i assume you have a nice chianti.  and a human liver.

Edited March 24, 2019 by elfenix
damnit i'm way behind the conversation

[Kennythetiger 9497]

12 hours ago, Underdog said:

Well shit, now I want a Luanne platter of liver & onions, mashed potatoes, mac n cheese, pecan pie, tea and a roll from Luby’s. 

My mom would occasionally make liver & onions when I was a kid.  Never understood how something so good could stink up the house for three days.

[NWBuck 8590]

11 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

My mom would occasionally make liver & onions when I was a kid.  Never understood how something so good could stink up the house for three days.

That's no way to talk about your mother... 

[lateshow 1309]

On 3/23/2019 at 3:19 PM, Walden Ponderer said:

We buy in bulk. Red pepper flakes go on anything and everything. Hell, I'd probably put 'em in my oatmeal, if I ever ate oatmeal.

Zesta crackers, vegetable oil, red pepper flakes. Let it sit in a large, sealed bowl for several hours, stirring every hour or so. Fucking money. 

Edited March 25, 2019 by lateshow

[You don't know me 1161]

When I tell a stupid dad joke and my 5 yo son belly laughs like it's the funniest thing he has ever heard.

[Underdog 28870]

Want to hear a cat joke?  

 

Just kitten. 

[You don't know me 1161]

On 3/21/2019 at 1:03 PM, mycox said:

The smell of the tires when shopping for new tires, and the smell of cedar in the hardware store.

Had a red cedar fall on my property a couple of years go. When I cut it the smell was fantastic.

[Buffsoldier 1895]

17 hours ago, You don't know me said:

When I tell a stupid dad joke and my 5 yo son belly laughs like it's the funniest thing he has ever heard.

When I tell a stupid dad joke and my 8 yr old rolls her eyes and groans. Warms my ice cold heart.

[Steamboat1874 4153]

Every time I want to eat crumbled blood that tastes like the smell of singed hair I eat liver.

That shit is fucking awful.

[Underdog 28870]

No.  Liver & Onions is the food of the Gods. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 22030]

Maybe if you worship satan

[El Diablo 4232]

45 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Maybe if you worship satan

It's mutual admiration.

[Prepuce of Doom 21115]

3 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Maybe if you worship satan

Team Satan! 

[chikin23 384]

I like to work the lyrics of older songs into conversations with my 12 year old daughter. I'll say the line, let the radio repeat what I just said, and get the eye roll.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

20 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Maybe if you worship satan

No, I checked the menu. Satan wouldn't be caught dead eating that crap.

[NeverMarryAStripper 22030]

After trying on every fucking prom dress in Houston, finally finding one that looks good, fits well, and my daughter actually likes.

Now off in search of shoes.

[Trey3216 15380]

2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

After trying on every fucking prom dress in Houston, finally finding one that looks good, fits well, and my daughter actually likes.

Now off in search of shoes.

You let your daughter watch you try on dresses?

[After irth 1245]

On 3/16/2019 at 5:28 PM, mdmost said:

Working from home all the time so that MM can always be on. 

I think she spells it O-P-R-A-H.