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Your most embarrassing moments...


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Posted

I could probably fill this thread up with my own stories.  Here's another one.

After my wife finished her undergrad, then Masters, I decided to go back to school and get a teaching degree.  I did it via a satellite program where I took classes in Knoxville for a degree from Tennessee Tech - the Texas Tech of Tennessee.  Anyway, final month at school and we're required to meet on TN Tech's campus in Cookeville.  There's 1,000+ in this huge conference room.  Guy with the mike is blabbing about something.  I'm, as usual, playing around and talking with my friends.  Suddenly, a ball comes flying through the air.  I catch it, extremely proud of myself for the quick reaction.  I then hear, "Whoever caught that ball, please come to the stage".  Oh shit.  What have I gotten myself into?  Conversation goes something like this...

Moderator:  I'm going to pretend like I'm a principal and I'm interviewing you for your first teaching job.

Me: Uh, ok.

Moderator:  Tell me why you wanted to be a teacher.

Me w/ my brain completely frozen:  Uh...  I uh.  Well, once my wife finished school and began teaching, she told me I needed a career, so I thought, well, hell, I may as well teach.  It doesn't look too hard.

The entire room went absolutely silent - except for my small group of friends in the back who were absolutely losing it.  Moderator was all, "Uh, ok.  Who wants to go next?"

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Posted

Early 2000s and at a work dinner with prospective clients, I was sitting next to a wall that was basically a mirror. Anyways, I got up to excuse myself and bumped “into myself” and said excuse me - I’m sorry.

My group never let me forget about that over the next decade. Too many Old Fashions pre-meal.

Hook’em!!!

Posted

I ruined a surprise party for a girl in high school. It was comically bad. And then I couldn't even go to the party.

Fortunately she was cool about it and wound up being part of our stoner circle.

Posted

My brother had a party and a friend of ours we hadn’t seen in probably 20 years showed up. He shows up with his wife and after about 20 beers I grabbed a candle that you couldn’t tell was lit and acted like I was going to throw it on her. Turns out it had been lit for a long time and had a huge puddle of wax in it. I threw wax all over her face and shirt. I felt like a complete fucking moron and looked even worse. They left immediately and I haven’t spoken to the guy since. 

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Posted

First night the wife and I were “together” I called her by her sister’s name. Yeah, ended up rubbing one out that night. 
 

Another time I was working as a bagger at HEB when I mistakenly put some dude’s booze in another customer’s cart.  Asshole tried to yell at me but I had my ear piece off. 

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Posted (edited)

Not my worst moment, that will take some reflection. 
 

But Priscilla asked our new neighbor when she is due.  She was not pregnant.  It’s been an awkward 10 years. 
 

Priscilla says that’s the only time she has made that goof. Great move with a permanent neighbor. 
 

Edit to add:  neighbor chick lost quite a bit of weight.  Welcome to the neighborhood!

Edited by Elvis
Posted

In junior high, I went to band camp in Lubbock at Texas Tech. They made a huge deal about not fraternizing with the opposite sex. 

Well, I got caught one night making out with a girl outside between buildings. The punishment? I was called up on stage in front of 5,000 fellow campers, and forced to make out with the girl. It was a brutal embarrassment.

Interesting side note though. The girl ended up six years later becoming Miss Lubbock in the State of Texas beauty pageant. So I’ve got that going for me. 

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Posted
4 minutes ago, Dbeasy said:

In junior high, I went to band camp in Lubbock at Texas Tech. They made a huge deal about not fraternizing with the opposite sex. 

Well, I got caught one night making out with a girl outside between buildings. The punishment? I was called up on stage in front of 5,000 fellow campers, and forced to make out with the girl. It was a brutal embarrassment.

Interesting side note though. The girl ended up six years later becoming Miss Lubbock in the State of Texas beauty pageant. So I’ve got that going for me. 

Somehow your avatar fits your story.

Posted

Eighth grade and I'm in a room with 40ish other students for a Junior NHS meeting. Perfectly timed with a pause in the talking by the teacher in the front of the room, I have a very audible fart slip past the defenses. 

Blessedly, it was not a stinker, but that was mortifying. 

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Posted
2 hours ago, Elvis said:

But Priscilla asked our new neighbor when she is due.  She was not pregnant.

a woman could be in the stirrups and crowning and you still don’t ask her if she’s pregnant.  get your woman in line. 

Posted
2 hours ago, Dbeasy said:

In junior high, I went to band camp in Lubbock at Texas Tech. They made a huge deal about not fraternizing with the opposite sex. 

Well, I got caught one night making out with a girl outside between buildings. The punishment? I was called up on stage in front of 5,000 fellow campers, and forced to make out with the girl. It was a brutal embarrassment.

Interesting side note though. The girl ended up six years later becoming Miss Lubbock in the State of Texas beauty pageant. So I’ve got that going for me. 

Wonder what would have happened had you been caught getting a beej?  Or in flagrante delicto.

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