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Posted
On 4/23/2025 at 8:20 AM, Bill Brasky said:

Pittsburg Hot Links 

Bill Brasky knows what's up.  This is a weird thing in Northeast Texas, and it's absolutely fucking awful.  I once had a hearing in Gilmer, and @Brisketexan told me to go to Gilmer's after my hearing and grab some hot links for lunch.  I think I finished two before deciding I'd prefer just to drive through a McDonald's off I-30 on my way back to Dallas.  I only just made it to I-30 before I had to have the most unholy out-both-ends experience of my life.  That poor McDonald's bathroom.

Fucking never again.*

But that raises a bigger issue: food in small or medium-sized Texas towns sucks ass.  Perhaps there was a time when there were restaurants in small towns that used fresh ingredients that were locally sourced in traditional recipes to come up with some fantastic shit.  But those days are in the past.  Now, it's much cheaper/easier to used canned or frozen ingredients, and everyone in small-town restaurants does.  And absolutely none of the recipes are any good when you use inferior ingredients.  

It has to be noted, too, that our palettes have changed.  Stuff that we thought was good 40 years ago now seems bland, uninteresting, and mundane.  It's even worse when you use canned green beans rather than fresh, or when you use pre-formed frozen hamburger patties.  But that's all you're going to get outside the major metropolitan areas.

 

 

* Speaking here both of eating Pittsburg hot links and of taking Brisket's advise on eateries.

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Posted

I'll say this for canned green beans.

My mother and grandmother made real southern style green beans, from fresh, simmered for hours and seasoned with bacon grease and/or salt pork, among other things.

It is much easier and quicker to near-duplicate that using canned beans than fresh.

Posted
46 minutes ago, Ghost of LL said:

I once had a hearing in Gilmer, and @Brisketexan told me to go to Gilmer's after my hearing and grab some hot links for lunch.  I think I finished two before deciding I'd prefer just to drive through a McDonald's off I-30 on my way back to Dallas.  I only just made it to I-30 before I had to have the most unholy out-both-ends experience of my life. 

Brisketexan: "That's not a bug, it's a feature."

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Posted
4 hours ago, texasdago said:

Well, you could've always opted for an RC Cola.

LOL.  That would have run $3.50.  But Lone Star and Martinis were $1.50 all night long.

Posted
2 hours ago, Cousin Strawberry said:

And why the fuck is tea $3?  What does it cost to brew 5 gallons of tea?

Assuming the place has a soda fountain tea and sodas are pennies.  That's why you end up with this

YARN | How is this a "child-size soda"? | Parks and Recreation (2009) -  S05E02 Soda Tax | Video gifs by quotes | 7c9c746d | 紗

Posted
2 hours ago, Cousin Strawberry said:

And why the fuck is tea $3?  What does it cost to brew 5 gallons of tea?

food margins have been pretty thin for the past 4-5 years, so most places raised the price of tea/fountain drinks to compensate.   while many will look at the price of food on the menu very few people look at the tea/fountain drink prices and just order whatever reflexively 

Posted
1 hour ago, Ghost of LL said:

But that raises a bigger issue: food in small or medium-sized Texas towns sucks ass.  Perhaps there was a time when there were restaurants in small towns that used fresh ingredients that were locally sourced in traditional recipes to come up with some fantastic shit.  But those days are in the past.  Now, it's much cheaper/easier to used canned or frozen ingredients, and everyone in small-town restaurants does.  And absolutely none of the recipes are any good when you use inferior ingredients.  

I disagree with this as a blanket statement, but for one reason only: the advent of the "Taqueria Morelia #2" or somesuch in most every small town.  In what used to a be a DQ, Pizza Hut, or some other small building, every small town now has some sort of legit taqueria, serving real mexican food with real ingredients.  It's often the only decent place in town, demonstrated by the fact that even all the white farmers meet there for lunch.

Otherwise, you're spot-on.

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Posted
2 hours ago, Ghost of LL said:

Bill Brasky knows what's up.  This is a weird thing in Northeast Texas, and it's absolutely fucking awful.  I once had a hearing in Gilmer, and @Brisketexan told me to go to Gilmer's after my hearing and grab some hot links for lunch.  I think I finished two before deciding I'd prefer just to drive through a McDonald's off I-30 on my way back to Dallas.  I only just made it to I-30 before I had to have the most unholy out-both-ends experience of my life.  That poor McDonald's bathroom.

Fucking never again.*

But that raises a bigger issue: food in small or medium-sized Texas towns sucks ass.  Perhaps there was a time when there were restaurants in small towns that used fresh ingredients that were locally sourced in traditional recipes to come up with some fantastic shit.  But those days are in the past.  Now, it's much cheaper/easier to used canned or frozen ingredients, and everyone in small-town restaurants does.  And absolutely none of the recipes are any good when you use inferior ingredients.  

It has to be noted, too, that our palettes have changed.  Stuff that we thought was good 40 years ago now seems bland, uninteresting, and mundane.  It's even worse when you use canned green beans rather than fresh, or when you use pre-formed frozen hamburger patties.  But that's all you're going to get outside the major metropolitan areas.

 

 

* Speaking here both of eating Pittsburg hot links and of taking Brisket's advise on eateries.

You sound like a delicate little flower. 

Posted

Lone Star hits the fucking spot.  I consider myself a connoisseur of regional cheap lagers, and for me Grain Belt and Lone Star are 1A and 1B nationally.

I don't know that jello salads and kolaches are inherently Texan.  Jello salad exists anywhere poor/cheap white people exist, and kolaches are everywhere the Czechs went.  I live adjacent to a super Czech community in north Iowa and kolaches are basically a form of currency there.

I always thought Texas BBQ was the most wildly overrated provincial bullshit out there, but then I went to a legit Texas BBQ joint and I realized I'd just had shitty Texas BBQ previously.  The Texas method/style is absolutely my BBQ preference at this point in time.  Even if I'm not cooking traditional Texas BBQ cuts, I gravitate to that general method.  It is superior.

Texas's dumbest food thing is the rigor of chili.  Chili is a fucking canvas.  Go nuts with it.  It might suck ass, but it might be divine.  Following some arcane rules can be kind of a fun challenge, but acting like anything outside of that "isn't chili" is silly AF.

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Posted
2 hours ago, Frank Drebin said:

Even shitty brisket can be chopped with some spicy sauce and make a very good sandwich.

Pretty much this

There's brisket that stand up on it's own and there's brisket that just has to be sauced and put on a bun or between 2 pieces of Texas toast and it's still fantastic.  Don't eat that kind on it's own - you need the bread, the sauce and the jalapenos/onions/pickles. 

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Posted
5 minutes ago, Js1 said:

Pretty much this

There's brisket that stand up on it's own and there's brisket that just has to be sauced and put on a bun or between 2 pieces of Texas toast and it's still fantastic.  Don't eat that kind on it's own - you need the bread, the sauce and the jalapenos/onions/pickles. 

Scramble it up with some eggs and make breakfast tacos/burritos.  Pile up on some chips for nachos.  Whatever.  Mediocre brisket is still pretty delicious.

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Posted
Just now, Al_4_ISU said:

Scramble it up with some eggs and make breakfast tacos/burritos.  Pile up on some chips for nachos.  Whatever.  Mediocre brisket is still pretty delicious.

Mmmm yes 

Posted
19 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

I disagree with this as a blanket statement, but for one reason only: the advent of the "Taqueria Morelia #2" or somesuch in most every small town.  In what used to a be a DQ, Pizza Hut, or some other small building, every small town now has some sort of legit taqueria, serving real mexican food with real ingredients.  It's often the only decent place in town, demonstrated by the fact that even all the white farmers meet there for lunch.

Otherwise, you're spot-on.

The old PIzza Hut in Navasota is now a funeral home.

Posted
20 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

I disagree with this as a blanket statement, but for one reason only: the advent of the "Taqueria Morelia #2" or somesuch in most every small town.  In what used to a be a DQ, Pizza Hut, or some other small building, every small town now has some sort of legit taqueria, serving real mexican food with real ingredients.  It's often the only decent place in town, demonstrated by the fact that even all the white farmers meet there for lunch.

Otherwise, you're spot-on.

Friendly amendment accepted.

15 minutes ago, ztejas said:

You sound like a delicate little flower. 

dan levy comedy GIF by CBC

Posted
2 hours ago, Ghost of LL said:

Bill Brasky knows what's up.  This is a weird thing in Northeast Texas, and it's absolutely fucking awful.  I once had a hearing in Gilmer, and @Brisketexan told me to go to Gilmer's after my hearing and grab some hot links for lunch.  I think I finished two before deciding I'd prefer just to drive through a McDonald's

Couldn’t help but notice that you ate two hot links before you decided that they were gross. 

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Posted

Concur on the chopped brisket sandwich, in a lot of places its a superior choice to the sliced brisket and a go-to if the pitmaster is just OK. And it nearly always is better than a pulled pork sandwich. 
 

Also concur on small town food adding the exception that some places manage a good greasy burger stop.  Other than that, its desolate unless you become known as a highway pit stop stalwart or if you manage to be a destination like Perini Ranch.  I was going to add the Albany Beehive as an example and saw it got killed in 2023.

Price is everything in those places and the era of the made from scratch cafe or diner is dead because the locals are all going to go to Subway or Hunt Pizza just on price alone.  

Posted
2 hours ago, Bill Brasky said:

food margins have been pretty thin for the past 4-5 years, so most places raised the price of tea/fountain drinks to compensate.   while many will look at the price of food on the menu very few people look at the tea/fountain drink prices and just order whatever reflexively 

I look. And I ain't paying $3 for no coke.

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Posted
2 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

Also concur on small town food adding the exception that some places manage a good greasy burger stop.  Other than that, its desolate unless you become known as a highway pit stop stalwart or if you manage to be a destination like Perini Ranch.  I was going to add the Albany Beehive as an example and saw it got killed in 2023.

Price is everything in those places and the era of the made from scratch cafe or diner is dead because the locals are all going to go to Subway or Hunt Pizza just on price alone.  

I think it's part of a larger discussion of small-town malaise.  Cost is obviously a big part of it.  Canned and frozen stuff last a lot longer than fresh, leading to less food waste.  Pre-formed and pre-packaged is easier, meaning you probably need less kitchen staff.

But at the same time, fresh shit can be sourced cheaply if you put in a little work.  I mean, ok--it's significantly more work than just calling Sysco.  But still, in a rural area it shouldn't be that hard to source fresh meat and produce from local providers.  And yeah--pounding out the CFS yourself rather than buying the shitty pre-formed things takes a bit of time.  But is it really that much more work?

The real problem is a complete absence of pride in the product.  And that lack of pride probably derives in large part to the issue you identify--your customer base wouldn't appreciate it even if you did put in the extra work.  They're happy with Sonic and Subway.  So why put together a decent meal if you're not going to be rewarded for it?

Thirty years ago, if I were to drive from Austin to Marshall or to Wichita Falls or to Marfa, there'd probably be a half-dozen places in random little towns that you'd really look forward to stopping at.  And virtually every little town would have a place that would be at least worth a stop.

Today--not a one.  Genuinely, not one.  I mean, maybe Perini Ranch is on the way to Wichita Falls.  I don't know.  But other than that, Brisket's right--the local Mexican place is the only place you ought to consider eating in small-town Texas.

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Posted

Not going to go back in this thread so don’t know if has been mentioned. 
 

Not sure if a Texas thing or poor people. Love them both. Thanks Dad. 
Buttermilk with saltines crunched up inside glass. Cornbread smashed up inside a glass of milk. 
Wife just cannot believe it. 

Of course her favorite thing is canned pear halves with mayonnaise.  NO. Had too much of that shit growing up.  

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Posted
7 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

Buttermilk with saltines crunched up inside glass. Cornbread smashed up inside a glass of milk. 
Wife just cannot believe it. 

Of course her favorite thing is canned pear halves with mayonnaise.  NO. Had too much of that shit growing up.  

Both of you should be handed a cigarette and then shot by firing squad but hey man we love the contributions.

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Posted
1 minute ago, ztejas said:

Both of you should be handed a cigarette and then shot by firing squad but hey man we love the contributions.

Well my most hated food is raw onions. Any raw onions. So nobody has same tastes. 

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Posted
Just now, Shaddie said:

Well my most hated food is raw onions. Any raw onions. So nobody has same tastes. 

I'm the same way.  Cooked, fine. I'll eat the shit out of onion rings, but I cannot abide them raw, or even undercooked in food if strong.

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Posted
17 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

Not going to go back in this thread so don’t know if has been mentioned. 
 

Not sure if a Texas thing or poor people. Love them both. Thanks Dad. 
Buttermilk with saltines crunched up inside glass. Cornbread smashed up inside a glass of milk. 
Wife just cannot believe it. 

Of course her favorite thing is canned pear halves with mayonnaise.  NO. Had too much of that shit growing up.  

what the fuck?  Ive never even heard of that. Thats sounds like something that happens during hell week of pledgeship.

Posted
15 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

Well my most hated food is raw onions. Any raw onions. So nobody has same tastes. 

 

12 minutes ago, TwiceHorn said:

I'm the same way.  Cooked, fine. I'll eat the shit out of onion rings, but I cannot abide them raw, or even undercooked in food if strong.

@TwiceHorn you can jump in his grave after we shoot him then we'll shoot both of you. 

Jk.

But - raw onions and pickles and white bread and sauce and brisket? 

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Posted (edited)
6 minutes ago, ztejas said:

 

@TwiceHorn you can jump in his grave after we shoot him then we'll shoot both of you. 

Jk.

But - raw onions and pickles and white bread and sauce and brisket? 

Can't do it.  Pickles fine.  Pickled onions, maybe. Raw, nope.

My Dad would eat a raw onion like people eat apples, Mom was nearly the same way.  They tried and enjoyed all the "onion fads," like Bermuda, 1015, all that.  They'd say, "oh this onion is so sweet and good, you really should give it a try."  Me:  "take a bite and gag."

One of my favorite phrases in a recipe that calls for onions is "saute until onions are transparent."

Edited by TwiceHorn
Posted
1 minute ago, ztejas said:

 

@TwiceHorn you can jump in his grave after we shoot him then we'll shoot both of you. 

Jk.

But - raw onions and pickles and white bread and sauce and brisket? 

NO on the raw onions. My south Texas wife hates cilantro. There is about 5% of population that has a gene where cilantro smells and taste like soap. Maybe same for me and onions. I have tried to train my tastebuds but it just never works.  

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Posted
32 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

Not going to go back in this thread so don’t know if has been mentioned. 
 

Not sure if a Texas thing or poor people. Love them both. Thanks Dad. 
Buttermilk with saltines crunched up inside glass. Cornbread smashed up inside a glass of milk. 
Wife just cannot believe it. 

Of course her favorite thing is canned pear halves with mayonnaise.  NO. Had too much of that shit growing up.  

Yeah, my Dad would do both, with a preference for buttermilk, but we didn't keep it around too much.

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Posted
On 4/23/2025 at 8:20 AM, Bill Brasky said:

Pittsburg Hot Links 

Went out of my way to try these a few years. They were disgusting. Even the chili was beyond terrible. I was genuinely angry.

Posted
1 minute ago, TwiceHorn said:

Yeah, my Dad would do both, with a preference for buttermilk, but we didn't keep it around too much.

Only time we had buttermilk was when mom made biscuits or fried chicken. I swear my looking for that stuff now is just me trying to chase the original (chicken) high.  

 

Posted

I like cornbread and sweetmilk for breakfast.  I can’t do buttermilk except in baking and I don’t feel the need to pretend I’m country enough to like that. 

Canned pear and mayo is so deranged its not even psychopathic. Its more like a coding bug or some garble the aliens picked up and taught in human school. Start doing little tests like mentioning that dreams appear at a 90 degree angle when people sleep on their sides. See if she mirrors the behavior and if so, robot. 

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Posted
3 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

I like cornbread and sweetmilk for breakfast.  I can’t do buttermilk except in baking and I don’t feel the need to pretend I’m country enough to like that. 

Canned pear and mayo is so deranged its not even psychopathic. Its more like a coding bug or some garble the aliens picked up and taught in human school. Start doing little tests like mentioning that dreams appear at a 90 degree angle when people sleep on their sides. See if she mirrors the behavior and if so, robot. 

You musta not been poor in the 70’s. 
I really don’t like buttermilk by itself but saltines bring a lot of salt relief. Now to bring to 11 you use HEB jalapeño saltines. 

Posted
26 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

I like cornbread and sweetmilk for breakfast.  I can’t do buttermilk except in baking and I don’t feel the need to pretend I’m country enough to like that. 

Canned pear and mayo is so deranged its not even psychopathic. Its more like a coding bug or some garble the aliens picked up and taught in human school. Start doing little tests like mentioning that dreams appear at a 90 degree angle when people sleep on their sides. See if she mirrors the behavior and if so, robot. 

Props for sweet milk.  Haven't heard that since my parents and grandparents were alive.

Posted
18 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

You musta not been poor in the 70’s. 
I really don’t like buttermilk by itself but saltines bring a lot of salt relief. Now to bring to 11 you use HEB jalapeño saltines. 

I get the buttermilk and saltines and how it could be a nostalgic thing that hits the spot like a fried baloney sandwich or slice hotdogs on wonderbread and cheese under a broiler.  
 

The pears and mayo are sending me, I don't know how you get there unless the AI in your brain glitches and just calculates the optimal calorie/nutrient mix based on what it scans. 

Posted
3 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

I get the buttermilk and saltines and how it could be a nostalgic thing that hits the spot like a fried baloney sandwich or slice hotdogs on wonderbread and cheese under a broiler.  
 

The pears and mayo are sending me, I don't know how you get there unless the AI in your brain glitches and just calculates the optimal calorie/nutrient mix based on what it scans. 

So you saw earlier post about congealed salads I guess? From there is not a far leap to canned pears and mayo. 
As I asked did you grow up in the 70’s and being poor? My mom grew up as 1 of 12 in the 40’s and 50’s and as kids they were stealing chicken eggs from neighbors poor. 

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