Tom "the turtle" Herman [Lame Duck or greatest 5d chess player ever?]

Hank_Hill · October 16, 2020

14 minutes ago, TexasPride10 said:

It has been mentioned in passing a few times on this board, but I'm shocked Herman's "Family Fridays" haven't received more attention/scrutiny from the national media. I remember thinking it was a cool idea when Herman first got here. My thought was "Hell yea, the players are going to love playing for this guy which will make us dominant!". But now here we are 3.5 years later and we have a sufficient sample size to conclude that something Herman is doing just flat out isn't working. Yet somehow no one has focused in on the fact that our guys play fucking wiffle ball and freeze tag the day before every single game instead of working on their gameplan. The NCAA already limits the amount of time teams are allowed to practice each week, and we choose to purposely handicap ourselves by throwing out one of those limited days of practice? Fuck you, Tom.

ESPECIALLY this year when practice time was already limited. Baffling.

Bobby_Batronic · October 16, 2020

1 hour ago, Longboard Horn said:

As far as I can remember, Texas has never fired any coach during the season. In 1997 we all knew Mackovic was a dead man walking after the Rout 66 debacle, but he was kept to finish the season while we made sure that Mack Brown was THE GUY to bring Texas out of the darkness.

However, I'm all for firing Herman at this point. We've all seen enough. His peak was 2018.

Different times. CFB is an even bigger deal now financially as well as being the front door to a university. The transfer portal and zero eligibility penalty didn’t exist. One of the 3 or 4 best college football coaches available wasn’t polishing the Fox game day set’s seats with his ass. And Texas doesn’t have a chickenshit, man/turtle hybrid pontificating for months before making s**t hires to deal with.

Bobby_Batronic · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

Well I doubt we're paying in cash. But maybe.

I was thinking 8 people and tacos from some local hotspot.

UPS can bring the heavy metal into Bergstrom if Urban prefers small, unmarked bills.

totallynotabuttpirate · October 16, 2020

12 minutes ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Is Dec 1 when Herman's buyout is reduced? I guess that is the only reasons for waiting?

It seems like the buyout would only be reduced by the amount of salary we pay him between now and then. So it would be pretty much the same.

Leanderman · October 16, 2020

At this point in time I wonder what Mangino and Stoops are doing these days? I have lost all faith in Mensa.

Gene Parmesan · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

It seems like the buyout would only be reduced by the amount of salary we pay him between now and then. So it would be pretty much the same.

Yeah I just don't see the point in waiting if Urban is the priority and he's willing. Especially with an early signing period. Maybe another embarrassment will speed up the time table.

Hank_Hill · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

It seems like the buyout would only be reduced by the amount of salary we pay him between now and then. So it would be pretty much the same.

I haven't seen the contract, but maybe 12/1 is when his next "year" of employment starts, dropping the buyout in to a new category.

EastTexan · October 16, 2020

1 hour ago, Not a Sock said:

Why do you dumb mother fuckers keep bring up sanctions? NCAA has basically no control over the P5 anymore they don’t have the balls to even threaten sanctions against a programs like Texas.

They could if Herman ain't fired.

Wally Pryor · October 16, 2020

29 minutes ago, TexasPride10 said:

Yet somehow no one has focused in on the fact that our guys play fucking wiffle ball and freeze tag the day before every single game instead of working on their gameplan. The NCAA already limits the amount of time teams are allowed to practice each week, and we choose to purposely handicap ourselves by throwing out one of those limited days of practice?

I wasn't aware of this but not surprising from a coach who seems to have written the book on shtick.

Wonder who the best wiffle ball player is.

Burt Macklin · October 16, 2020

3 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

It seems like the buyout would only be reduced by the amount of salary we pay him between now and then. So it would be pretty much the same.

Yeah, the buyout talk is meaningless. His only buyout is his guaranteed salary so the University will end up paying him the same amount no matter what.

TexasEx · October 16, 2020

8 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

It seems like the buyout would only be reduced by the amount of salary we pay him between now and then. So it would be pretty much the same.

It’s reportedly something like $20 mil now, $15.5 mil 12/1.

RGBIII · October 16, 2020

3 hours ago, drifter379 said:

I think it’s a given that we would win with Meyer. But is it worth selling our souls.
When he decides to quit or gets fired over sanctions in 3-4 years will we be in any better position than we are right now?

I don’t know who the right guy is for this program but I throw up in my mouth a little bit thinking about seeing Urban Meyer in burnt orange on the sidelines.

Sure, Urban Meyer has a lot of baggage...but the only baggage I give a fuck about is his getting picked up in Columbus and moved to Austin plus whatever he carries on the plane

WinningIsHard · October 16, 2020

5 minutes ago, Burt Macklin said:

Yeah, the buyout talk is meaningless. His only buyout is his guaranteed salary so the University will end up paying him the same amount no matter what.

The university paying his salary is a different budget than the money coming out of the BMD's pockets, right? Or am I regarded

Not a cat · October 16, 2020

46 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

I recall @closetojumping mentioning that part of Meyer's stress at florida and the state of ohio shit hole was the constant need to cheat their asses off to please the alumni and fans. With our resources, brand name in recruiting, and proclivity to not cheat I think Urban could spend the rest of his career here then walk away the best of all time. I am obviously full of shit and really drinking the urb kool aid. Fuck it, show me a loss.

I don't get this- if urban were in a tradition and resource rich school in fertile recruiting territory he wouldn't need to cheat. You mean schools like OSU and Florida?

Having said that, fuck it, I'm all in on urban. But let's go in with eyes wide open and not act like our setup is somehow miles above his previous 2 employers and all he'd need to do is show up.

Treefidy · October 16, 2020

38 minutes ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Is Dec 1 when Herman's buyout is reduced? I guess that is the only reasons for waiting?

His contract start date was 12/1//16, his buyout on 12/1/20 will be 15,416,667. Waiting on that date doesn’t move the needle that much, his current buyout is 16,041,667

His contract is 5M per year remaining if fired for cause. The reason for the additional 416;667 is his contract expires 12/31/2023, so on 12/1 it’s 15,416,667 while on 12/31 it’s 5M

Edited October 16, 2020 by Treefidy
Fuck, or I could have just said he gets 416,667 for every month remaining on his contract until 12/31/2023

TejasPedro · October 16, 2020

So, we are waiting till December to save 4.5 Million.
How much will this cost us when it’s all said and done?

4.5 Come on man...

Can we start a GTFO Fund?

I got 5 on it

RGBIII · October 16, 2020

Humidor

Spoiler

It’s been a combustible week on the Texas internet with the team’s in-game and post-game activity not doing the other one any favors. Let’s quickly backtrack to last Saturday and just moments after the loss.

UTiananmen

The galvanizing picture of Sam Ehlinger standing alone for The Eyes of Texas after pulling his own “Tank Man” impression and willing his team to overtime needs to be put in proper context. The picture may not need to be preserved in the UT 2020 time capsule after all. Or maybe it should, you decide.

After the loss, the Longhorn players relinquished the field to the Sooners for the Golden Hat ceremony. I was told the players didn’t know there would be a singing of The Eyes as there was no band in attendance. Now, this doesn’t mean they would have stayed if @jtsween and the rest of the LHB were there. Most didn’t stay after the UTEP game either, but the key piece is they didn’t know their QB was out there alone. Ehlinger remained on the field giving interviews. As he headed back to the locker room the song came on over the loudspeaker. He stopped and sang the song. He was alone, the picture was snapped, and all hell broke loose.

Per my source, at first his teammates didn’t know he was still out on the field, much less alone. When they realized he wasn’t in the locker room, some trickled out looking for him, notably Ta’Quon Graham. There’s no fracture within the team and certainly no issue between Ehlinger and his teammates. The same couldn’t be said for the fan base, or Tom Herman, and to a lesser degree, Chris Del Conte, and the boosters.

Seeing the issue at hand, Del Conte scheduled a “team” meeting on Monday morning. As we reported, Del Conte addressed the team on Wednesday evening after practice. Practice is where they work to get better; the meeting was to address the issue with the Eyes. I need to spell that out because many a Twitter celeb couldn’t quite figure out why Texas was worried about a song instead of improving the product on the field. Turns out you can do both!

Del Conte didn’t go in there looking for a discussion or anyone’s opinion on the matter. This wasn’t a heart to heart. The school has already met demands and made a lot of concessions. He flatly told the football team what was expected of them just like he told the other teams. The message: stand with your teammates and fans, if you don’t want to sing, don’t sing.

The Texas AD mentioned the issue was ripping the fan base apart. I talked to somebody close to a player who can justifiably be characterized as a team leader. In other words, not a fake leader Herman anointed to appease a certain group within the team. This person said, “They respect the fans. They know the song is sung at weddings and they’ve being singing it since they were five-years old. They don’t think the fans are racist in any way for singing it. Some don’t want to sing it just because they’re expected to and they’re personally not comfortable with it based on what they know of it.” I wish I could share the audio because it comes across in such a good, heartfelt tone. There’s nothing militant about it. There’s no anger behind it. For most, this isn’t iconoclasm.

The truth is — and we mentioned this in the summer — most on the team are simply going with the flow. They don’t want issues in the locker room, social or otherwise, and they simply want to support their teammates. The most vocal group aren’t large in numbers, but they do pressure others to follow them. There is no divide along racial lines. In fact, many of the black players agree with standing for the school song, rather than leaving the field or protesting in any way.

From a leadership perspective, Herman couldn’t have handled this situation any worse, but right now the fallout from the song is the least of his concerns.

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

As you can imagine, we’ve been talking to sources of all stripes of late. We keep a handy little Google Doc where we store everything we hear, no matter how minor. It makes it easier to keep track of the situation, plus it makes it rather clear where the information overlaps and corroborates.

What we can share we will, and also tell you how much credence we give it. We’ll base that either on how many times we’ve heard it, or by who told us. You’re only as good as your sources and some sources are better than others. You’re also as bad as their agendas, but it’s typically not hard to read through agendas. Step 1 is caring to do so.

Scenario 1: The U in the title of this Humidor, you know, the strong, centralizing figure, is in play.

This is a delicate subject but if you think we would have hinted in his direction in the Scoop just for the fun of it, you haven’t been reading closely. In the span of 10 days we’ve gone from ’he will never coach at Texas,’ to Lee Corso’s favorite saying. We think the trilateral commission of president, AD, and BoR, would sign off on such a hire. Del Conte‘s mindset isn’t to win at all costs, but it’s to win at a lot of them. If he never coaches at Texas, it isn’t because he was found to be unsavory.

Credence: Money could become an issue. So too could another job potentially popping up. If this hire wasn’t doable word would have filtered out by now. If you want him to be the hire, no news is good news for now.

Scenario 2: No deal can be struck with option #1, due to financial constraints Herman returns.

I’ve heard this a couple of times, including on Thursday, and from somebody I hold in high regard. The thinking is money is just too tight to make a move unless it’s for a sure thing and there aren’t many sure things beyond death, taxes, and FITH.

Credence: We believe the money for action will be there when it’s needed. Herman doesn’t have many allies, and at this point, we can’t see this scenario unless he goes on a big winning streak, and by that, we mean probably the rest of the games. Absent a very impressive run of games, the only way he’d return is if the boosters didn’t want to foot the bill for his buyout. You can probably recall what we’ve been writing about how the boosters view Herman. Del Conte would have to rustle up a really bad alternative to Herman for the boosters to sit on their wallets. That’s highly unlikely, even in what looks like a limited field. The recruiting situation is also a factor that favors change, that is: the 2021 class is in poor shape, but 2022 can still be great.

Scenario 3: No deal can be struck with option #1, comprehensive search ensues.

Comprehensive search doesn’t mean you begin in late November and extend it well into December. Del Conte should be operating on this track in tandem with Scenario #1. I’m sure he is to some degree. We’ve heard a couple names of interest. We’ll hold them for now. One is widely mentioned; one we haven’t seen mentioned yet. That’ll give you something to ponder this weekend.

Credence: This scenario could definitely take place. It might even be the most likely depending on how you view Scenario 1.

For now there’s no job opening and it isn’t truly guaranteed it will open. But, if Del Conte doesn’t make a move, all those cardboard cutouts you currently see in stadiums nationwide will come in handy as the school opens its newly expanded stadium next fall. Now that sounds costly.

BAYLOR LOOMS?

The Baylor Bears currently sit at 2-3. That’s two games played and three games postponed for the 1-1 Bears. Next week’s game between Texas and Baylor is under question. I don’t even know what’s public on their situation, but I’ve heard the big issue is contact tracing. It appears they finally got good usage out of all those ankle monitors. Yeah, you just turn those suckers on and you know where people are at all times.

Something is clearly broken with how first-year head coach Dave Aranda has gone about defending against Covid. We’ll see if they can get things under control in time to play a week from Saturday.

Of course Texas is preparing as if the game will be played. We’ve heard practices have been great and there’s a real sense of urgency. That’s not true, we didn’t hear either of those things, but we have heard some positives whether fans want those positives to exist or not.

Within the team, there's a strong group that is vocal about winning out. The names won’t surprise you: Sam Ehlinger, Joseph Ossai, Josh Thompson, and Keondre Coburn have all been singled out for their vocal leadership. These players are making a concerted effort to keep the team positive and eager to prepare for Baylor.

Frankly, we were expecting to hear about a fractured team, one that has started to tune out the coaches but that is not the case. The players still believe in the coaches and vice versa. The sense on the team is the coaches are doing a better job of putting players in positions to make plays than fans think. The players blame themselves for lack of discipline, mental errors, and letting their technique get away from them. There is a palpable sense of accountability with the players.

Tom Herman made sure to have energetic practices this week by practicing good on good. The first team defense and first team offense went against each other in hopes of improving team discipline. You don’t have to play as sharp or with as much intensity practicing against the scout team.

Of course they’ve spent a lot of time working on technique and fundamentals. None of this is meant to make you think they’re improving, or they’ll win out, it’s just to tell you how they‘ve spent their time.

On the downside, we’ve heard the head coach is too involved on the offensive side of the ball, which is pretty evident watching the games. Herman has a governor on ”offensive coordinator” Mike Yurcich. Herman basically admitted that in his postgame press conference when he groveled about tempo. We may go into more detail here at another point in time.

Aside coverage busts the feeling behind the scenes is the defense continues to show improvement. I mentioned to a source they looked tired in Dallas and got back a derisive, “they were on the field too much.” Not-so-complementary football, imo.

Many impatient fans are wondering why Herman hasn’t been fired yet. Aside the obvious, he’s only four games into the season, we’d say it’s because he hasn’t lost the team.

A couple weeks ago we wrote a piece about the 2018 class titled “It’s now or next year.” It was written within the context of the TCU, OU, Baylor, Oklahoma State four game stretch. For Tom Herman, it’s now or never starting with the next two games.

NeverMarryAStripper · October 16, 2020

44 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

Well I doubt we're paying in cash. But maybe.

Well $75 million in $100 bills weighs about 1,653 lbs. The load capacity of a Gulfstream V is about 6,600 lbs. So we can do it.

Edited October 16, 2020 by NeverMarryAStripper

Skipper · October 16, 2020

Regarding this portion of the quote above:

"After the loss, the Longhorn players relinquished the field to the Sooners for the Golden Hat ceremony. I was told the players didn’t know there would be a singing of The Eyes as there was no band in attendance. Now, this doesn’t mean they would have stayed if @jtsween and the rest of the LHB were there. Most didn’t stay after the UTEP game either, but the key piece is they didn’t know their QB was out there alone. Ehlinger remained on the field giving interviews. As he headed back to the locker room the song came on over the loudspeaker. He stopped and sang the song. He was alone, the picture was snapped, and all hell broke loose."

I think this is probably pretty accurate. I was there. I was pretty hammered but I recall it took them quite a bit of time after the end of the game to start The Eyes. I pretty much thought they just weren't going to play it and was wondering if any of the fans would start it on their own, then all of a sudden it came on the loud speaker. So on one hand, I think this is accurate. On the other hand, given the fucking optics, Herman and his staff absolutely should have known that "at some point after the game the loud speaker will play The Eyes" and thus win or lose some staff member needs to keep the players on the field. Again, this falls 100% on Herman's dumb ass.

Edited October 16, 2020 by Skipper

ConferenceRoom · October 16, 2020

5 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Well $75 million in $100 bills weighs about 1,653 lbs. The load capacity of a Gulfstream V is about 6,600 lbs. So we can do it.

Okay, but what's heavier: a kilogram of steel or a kilogram of feathers?

TXpride · October 16, 2020

3 hours ago, drifter379 said:

I think it’s a given that we would win with Meyer. But is it worth selling our souls.
When he decides to quit or gets fired over sanctions in 3-4 years will we be in any better position than we are right now?

I don’t know who the right guy is for this program but I throw up in my mouth a little bit thinking about seeing Urban Meyer in burnt orange on the sidelines.

There is no other option. The program is teetering right now. If we miss on this hire, we're fucked for another decade. Possibly for good.

Edited October 16, 2020 by TXpride

ztejas · October 16, 2020

3 hours ago, drifter379 said:

I think it’s a given that we would win with Meyer. But is it worth selling our souls.
When he decides to quit or gets fired over sanctions in 3-4 years will we be in any better position than we are right now?

I don’t know who the right guy is for this program but I throw up in my mouth a little bit thinking about seeing Urban Meyer in burnt orange on the sidelines.

This would have been a decent post in 2018.

LTtxfan · October 16, 2020

This 247 article says Herman's buyout prior to Dec 1st is $15.4M. What is the buyout on/after Dec 1st??

https://247sports.com/LongFormArticle/College-football-highest-paid-coaches-buyout-totals-Nick-Saban-Dabo-Swinney-Jim-Harbaugh-Will-Muschamp-Kirby-Smart-152973099/Amp/?__twitter_impression=true

Quote: 11. Tom Herman, Texas ($6M; $15.4M)

The word: To fire Tom Herman this season, the Longhorns' deep-pocketed boosters would need to shell out $15.4 million dollars if removed prior to Dec. 1 in addition coaching staff holds.

Edited October 16, 2020 by LTtxfan

Bill Lumbergh · October 16, 2020

Humidor
Spoiler
It’s been a combustible week on the Texas internet with the team’s in-game and post-game activity not doing the other one any favors. Let’s quickly backtrack to last Saturday and just moments after the loss.

UTiananmen

The galvanizing picture of Sam Ehlinger standing alone for The Eyes of Texas after pulling his own “Tank Man” impression and willing his team to overtime needs to be put in proper context. The picture may not need to be preserved in the UT 2020 time capsule after all. Or maybe it should, you decide.

After the loss, the Longhorn players relinquished the field to the Sooners for the Golden Hat ceremony. I was told the players didn’t know there would be a singing of The Eyes as there was no band in attendance. Now, this doesn’t mean they would have stayed if @jtsween and the rest of the LHB were there. Most didn’t stay after the UTEP game either, but the key piece is they didn’t know their QB was out there alone. Ehlinger remained on the field giving interviews. As he headed back to the locker room the song came on over the loudspeaker. He stopped and sang the song. He was alone, the picture was snapped, and all hell broke loose.

Per my source, at first his teammates didn’t know he was still out on the field, much less alone. When they realized he wasn’t in the locker room, some trickled out looking for him, notably Ta’Quon Graham. There’s no fracture within the team and certainly no issue between Ehlinger and his teammates. The same couldn’t be said for the fan base, or Tom Herman, and to a lesser degree, Chris Del Conte, and the boosters.

Seeing the issue at hand, Del Conte scheduled a “team” meeting on Monday morning. As we reported, Del Conte addressed the team on Wednesday evening after practice. Practice is where they work to get better; the meeting was to address the issue with the Eyes. I need to spell that out because many a Twitter celeb couldn’t quite figure out why Texas was worried about a song instead of improving the product on the field. Turns out you can do both!

Del Conte didn’t go in there looking for a discussion or anyone’s opinion on the matter. This wasn’t a heart to heart. The school has already met demands and made a lot of concessions. He flatly told the football team what was expected of them just like he told the other teams. The message: stand with your teammates and fans, if you don’t want to sing, don’t sing.

The Texas AD mentioned the issue was ripping the fan base apart. I talked to somebody close to a player who can justifiably be characterized as a team leader. In other words, not a fake leader Herman anointed to appease a certain group within the team. This person said, “They respect the fans. They know the song is sung at weddings and they’ve being singing it since they were five-years old. They don’t think the fans are racist in any way for singing it. Some don’t want to sing it just because they’re expected to and they’re personally not comfortable with it based on what they know of it.” I wish I could share the audio because it comes across in such a good, heartfelt tone. There’s nothing militant about it. There’s no anger behind it. For most, this isn’t iconoclasm.

The truth is — and we mentioned this in the summer — most on the team are simply going with the flow. They don’t want issues in the locker room, social or otherwise, and they simply want to support their teammates. The most vocal group aren’t large in numbers, but they do pressure others to follow them. There is no divide along racial lines. In fact, many of the black players agree with standing for the school song, rather than leaving the field or protesting in any way.

From a leadership perspective, Herman couldn’t have handled this situation any worse, but right now the fallout from the song is the least of his concerns.

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

As you can imagine, we’ve been talking to sources of all stripes of late. We keep a handy little Google Doc where we store everything we hear, no matter how minor. It makes it easier to keep track of the situation, plus it makes it rather clear where the information overlaps and corroborates.

What we can share we will, and also tell you how much credence we give it. We’ll base that either on how many times we’ve heard it, or by who told us. You’re only as good as your sources and some sources are better than others. You’re also as bad as their agendas, but it’s typically not hard to read through agendas. Step 1 is caring to do so.

Scenario 1: The U in the title of this Humidor, you know, the strong, centralizing figure, is in play.

This is a delicate subject but if you think we would have hinted in his direction in the Scoop just for the fun of it, you haven’t been reading closely. In the span of 10 days we’ve gone from ’he will never coach at Texas,’ to Lee Corso’s favorite saying. We think the trilateral commission of president, AD, and BoR, would sign off on such a hire. Del Conte‘s mindset isn’t to win at all costs, but it’s to win at a lot of them. If he never coaches at Texas, it isn’t because he was found to be unsavory.

Credence: Money could become an issue. So too could another job potentially popping up. If this hire wasn’t doable word would have filtered out by now. If you want him to be the hire, no news is good news for now.

Scenario 2: No deal can be struck with option #1, due to financial constraints Herman returns.

I’ve heard this a couple of times, including on Thursday, and from somebody I hold in high regard. The thinking is money is just too tight to make a move unless it’s for a sure thing and there aren’t many sure things beyond death, taxes, and FITH.

Credence: We believe the money for action will be there when it’s needed. Herman doesn’t have many allies, and at this point, we can’t see this scenario unless he goes on a big winning streak, and by that, we mean probably the rest of the games. Absent a very impressive run of games, the only way he’d return is if the boosters didn’t want to foot the bill for his buyout. You can probably recall what we’ve been writing about how the boosters view Herman. Del Conte would have to rustle up a really bad alternative to Herman for the boosters to sit on their wallets. That’s highly unlikely, even in what looks like a limited field. The recruiting situation is also a factor that favors change, that is: the 2021 class is in poor shape, but 2022 can still be great.

Scenario 3: No deal can be struck with option #1, comprehensive search ensues.

Comprehensive search doesn’t mean you begin in late November and extend it well into December. Del Conte should be operating on this track in tandem with Scenario #1. I’m sure he is to some degree. We’ve heard a couple names of interest. We’ll hold them for now. One is widely mentioned; one we haven’t seen mentioned yet. That’ll give you something to ponder this weekend.

Credence: This scenario could definitely take place. It might even be the most likely depending on how you view Scenario 1.

For now there’s no job opening and it isn’t truly guaranteed it will open. But, if Del Conte doesn’t make a move, all those cardboard cutouts you currently see in stadiums nationwide will come in handy as the school opens its newly expanded stadium next fall. Now that sounds costly.

BAYLOR LOOMS?

The Baylor Bears currently sit at 2-3. That’s two games played and three games postponed for the 1-1 Bears. Next week’s game between Texas and Baylor is under question. I don’t even know what’s public on their situation, but I’ve heard the big issue is contact tracing. It appears they finally got good usage out of all those ankle monitors. Yeah, you just turn those suckers on and you know where people are at all times.

Something is clearly broken with how first-year head coach Dave Aranda has gone about defending against Covid. We’ll see if they can get things under control in time to play a week from Saturday.

Of course Texas is preparing as if the game will be played. We’ve heard practices have been great and there’s a real sense of urgency. That’s not true, we didn’t hear either of those things, but we have heard some positives whether fans want those positives to exist or not.

Within the team, there's a strong group that is vocal about winning out. The names won’t surprise you: Sam Ehlinger, Joseph Ossai, Josh Thompson, and Keondre Coburn have all been singled out for their vocal leadership. These players are making a concerted effort to keep the team positive and eager to prepare for Baylor.

Frankly, we were expecting to hear about a fractured team, one that has started to tune out the coaches but that is not the case. The players still believe in the coaches and vice versa. The sense on the team is the coaches are doing a better job of putting players in positions to make plays than fans think. The players blame themselves for lack of discipline, mental errors, and letting their technique get away from them. There is a palpable sense of accountability with the players.

Tom Herman made sure to have energetic practices this week by practicing good on good. The first team defense and first team offense went against each other in hopes of improving team discipline. You don’t have to play as sharp or with as much intensity practicing against the scout team.

Of course they’ve spent a lot of time working on technique and fundamentals. None of this is meant to make you think they’re improving, or they’ll win out, it’s just to tell you how they‘ve spent their time.

On the downside, we’ve heard the head coach is too involved on the offensive side of the ball, which is pretty evident watching the games. Herman has a governor on ”offensive coordinator” Mike Yurcich. Herman basically admitted that in his postgame press conference when he groveled about tempo. We may go into more detail here at another point in time.

Aside coverage busts the feeling behind the scenes is the defense continues to show improvement. I mentioned to a source they looked tired in Dallas and got back a derisive, “they were on the field too much.” Not-so-complementary football, imo.

Many impatient fans are wondering why Herman hasn’t been fired yet. Aside the obvious, he’s only four games into the season, we’d say it’s because he hasn’t lost the team.

A couple weeks ago we wrote a piece about the 2018 class titled “It’s now or next year.” It was written within the context of the TCU, OU, Baylor, Oklahoma State four game stretch. For Tom Herman, it’s now or never starting with the next two games.

Now THIS is more like it.

So many words to say, we'll either hire Urban, stick with Herman, or hire someone else. Which one is most likely? Well, 1, or 3, or possibly 2 also depending on how things play out. Situation is fluid.

This is the $9.95 we've been waiting for.

MonkeyDoughnut · October 16, 2020

3 minutes ago, Bill Lumbergh said:

Now THIS is more like it.

So many words to say, we'll either hire Urban, stick with Herman, or hire someone else. Which one is most likely? Well, 1, or 3, or possibly 2 also depending on how things play out. Situation is fluid.

This is the $9.95 we've been waiting for.

You left out the key parts:

Could happen sooner..or later... or never.

And a name not mentioned before is a possibility.. if names already known don't pan out

BrazilHorn · October 16, 2020

Hire Urban, give Herman a red slingline and a can of bug spray and move his ass to the basement. Once Dec 1st comes fire his ass. Maybe make him UT's liaison to Uzbekistan if basement seems too cushy.

closetojumping · October 16, 2020

1 hour ago, WinningIsHard said:

I recall @closetojumping mentioning that part of Meyer's stress at florida and the state of ohio shit hole was the constant need to cheat their asses off to please the alumni and fans. With our resources, brand name in recruiting, and proclivity to not cheat I think Urban could spend the rest of his career here then walk away the best of all time. I am obviously full of shit and really drinking the urb kool aid. Fuck it, show me a loss.

35 minutes ago, Not a cat said:

I don't get this- if urban were in a tradition and resource rich school in fertile recruiting territory he wouldn't need to cheat. You mean schools like OSU and Florida?

Having said that, fuck it, I'm all in on urban. But let's go in with eyes wide open and not act like our setup is somehow miles above his previous 2 employers and all he'd need to do is show up.

Yeah, I want to elaborate on this for clarity so folks can at least understand what they agree or disagree with me about on this subject. I've spoilered for those uninterested, as it's long.

Spoiler

Outside of Barry Switzer and Jackie Sherrill, there haven't been a bunch of coaches that reveled in cheating. Mike Dubose and Kirby Smart, I guess, might fit this. Guys like Meyer and Saban are pragmatists without a giant moral compass - cheating was a means to an end. At places like Alabama and Auburn, "if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'" isn't just a pithy axiom, it's fucking mantra. That creates a regional atmosphere in which there are no excuses with other schools not to be competitive by doing the same as well.

So Meyer went from relatively clean experiences at CSU, Notre Dame, Bowling Green, and Utah, to "WTF is going here?!?" and new choices when he showed up at UF. Saban had indoctrinated LSU into a new age of sophistication with cheating before heading out to Miami. LSU, as a community from fans and players up to the top of the state admin following the program, welcome that shit. Auburn was right there with them and FSU and Bowden cheated how they wanted, when they wanted. Bama was beating the shit out of Mike Shula to do more of it and he wasn't. Zook, out of desperation, took to it really quickly and talent acquisition wasn't ever his problem.

So at UF, Urban Meyer made a choice, and an easy one, and then took it to a new level because of his staff's native evaluation and recruiting capabilities without the intoxicant of "whatever it takes". That subsequently led to titles. It also led to a Head Coach that ultimately hated his fucking team and was having panic attacks about being trapped in a doom loop that he could never escape. That was a problem for his wife, on top of everything else. Saban showing up at Bama and officially escalating the cheating to its own regional game was the cherry on top. He eventually found a way out.

Ohio State, of course, doesn't present the same problems. Michigan and Notre Dame are as naive and ignorant to cheating as Texas. All three of those schools have a dated, patrician view of talent acquisition being, in part, a byproduct of their prestige as institutions. We witness issues with this to this day at UT. PSU was scandal-laden at the time. Basically, the Big 10 represented just one big, giant pussy, waiting to be fucked. Enter Urban Meyer. Cheating at Ohio State is like cheating at USC. It's simply how business gets conducted when necessary, but we don't need to talk about such things or wallow in the slop like the rednecks in the south, amirite?

The big problem for Meyer at Ohio State is that he, or his base, was not going to be content just owning the Big 10. The narrative that the Big 10 couldn't compete with the warmer climate schools because the talent was too big and slow had worn the entire conference thin. So Meyer concluded immediately that they were going to import talent to Ohio from the warmer climates in order to not only own the Big 10, but out-athlete the SEC, USC, FSU, and the Big 12. Oregon is doing the same shit right now. Does that mean that Meyer loved the shit? No. It's dirty, even if you rationalize that these poor kids and their families need the money, it's still done under the cover of darkness and full of headaches, especially when some of these guys are straight up being sold to programs by street agents and/or parents.

So if the guy comes to Texas, will he cheat? I hope so. I'm past my own innocence regarding how it all works in CFB. There are going to be difference makers like Jaylen Waddle, Marvin Wilson, and Demarvion Leal who are straight up going to be bid out. Bama bought Waddle for $80k. Wilson went for something similar with the same Will Lyles-led crew handling his auction. Leal went for something straight to the mom. They were all worth it to the programs, as you've witnessed by their performances, if you've been paying to CFB for the past 5 years. Urban Meyer or not, those guys aren't come to Texas just because Urban Meyer has Texas on the upswing.

But will he have to cheat as much? No, and he won't be encouraged to do so. Also, the landscape continues to change and as the NIL stuff emerges as a weapon, Texas is at least correctly viewing that as an arms race and plans to win there, as they should. Even with Texas being a laughingstock in CFB and CBB for a decade, the eyeballs, merchandise sales, revenue, exposure and so forth are all still built in and only get crazier nationally when Texas is good.

1 hour ago, TexasPride10 said:

It has been mentioned in passing a few times on this board, but I'm shocked Herman's "Family Fridays" haven't received more attention/scrutiny from the national media. I remember thinking it was a cool idea when Herman first got here. My thought was "Hell yea, the players are going to love playing for this guy which will make us dominant!". But now here we are 3.5 years later and we have a sufficient sample size to conclude that something Herman is doing just flat out isn't working. Yet somehow no one has focused in on the fact that our guys play fucking wiffle ball and freeze tag the day before every single game instead of working on their gameplan. The NCAA already limits the amount of time teams are allowed to practice each week, and we choose to purposely handicap ourselves by throwing out one of those limited days of practice? Fuck you, Tom.

Herman is flatly and obviously not genuine. Even guys completely wowed by his gimmicks will eventually see through to the true narcissist underneath. When that happens, they'll see the obvious - he doesn't give a shit about anyone else but himself.

Edited October 16, 2020 by closetojumping

TexasGolf · October 16, 2020

Quote

On the downside, we’ve heard the head coach is too involved on the offensive side of the ball, which is pretty evident watching the games. Herman has a governor on ”offensive coordinator” Mike Yurcich. Herman basically admitted that in his postgame press conference when he groveled about tempo. We may go into more detail here at another point in time.

So evident turtle tom's hands have been all over the offensive game plan while at the same time blaming covid for lack of practice to install a "new system".

NoName · October 16, 2020

28 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

Humidor

Hide contents

It’s been a combustible week on the Texas internet with the team’s in-game and post-game activity not doing the other one any favors. Let’s quickly backtrack to last Saturday and just moments after the loss.

UTiananmen

The galvanizing picture of Sam Ehlinger standing alone for The Eyes of Texas after pulling his own “Tank Man” impression and willing his team to overtime needs to be put in proper context. The picture may not need to be preserved in the UT 2020 time capsule after all. Or maybe it should, you decide.

After the loss, the Longhorn players relinquished the field to the Sooners for the Golden Hat ceremony. I was told the players didn’t know there would be a singing of The Eyes as there was no band in attendance. Now, this doesn’t mean they would have stayed if @jtsween and the rest of the LHB were there. Most didn’t stay after the UTEP game either, but the key piece is they didn’t know their QB was out there alone. Ehlinger remained on the field giving interviews. As he headed back to the locker room the song came on over the loudspeaker. He stopped and sang the song. He was alone, the picture was snapped, and all hell broke loose.

Per my source, at first his teammates didn’t know he was still out on the field, much less alone. When they realized he wasn’t in the locker room, some trickled out looking for him, notably Ta’Quon Graham. There’s no fracture within the team and certainly no issue between Ehlinger and his teammates. The same couldn’t be said for the fan base, or Tom Herman, and to a lesser degree, Chris Del Conte, and the boosters.

Seeing the issue at hand, Del Conte scheduled a “team” meeting on Monday morning. As we reported, Del Conte addressed the team on Wednesday evening after practice. Practice is where they work to get better; the meeting was to address the issue with the Eyes. I need to spell that out because many a Twitter celeb couldn’t quite figure out why Texas was worried about a song instead of improving the product on the field. Turns out you can do both!

Del Conte didn’t go in there looking for a discussion or anyone’s opinion on the matter. This wasn’t a heart to heart. The school has already met demands and made a lot of concessions. He flatly told the football team what was expected of them just like he told the other teams. The message: stand with your teammates and fans, if you don’t want to sing, don’t sing.

The Texas AD mentioned the issue was ripping the fan base apart. I talked to somebody close to a player who can justifiably be characterized as a team leader. In other words, not a fake leader Herman anointed to appease a certain group within the team. This person said, “They respect the fans. They know the song is sung at weddings and they’ve being singing it since they were five-years old. They don’t think the fans are racist in any way for singing it. Some don’t want to sing it just because they’re expected to and they’re personally not comfortable with it based on what they know of it.” I wish I could share the audio because it comes across in such a good, heartfelt tone. There’s nothing militant about it. There’s no anger behind it. For most, this isn’t iconoclasm.

The truth is — and we mentioned this in the summer — most on the team are simply going with the flow. They don’t want issues in the locker room, social or otherwise, and they simply want to support their teammates. The most vocal group aren’t large in numbers, but they do pressure others to follow them. There is no divide along racial lines. In fact, many of the black players agree with standing for the school song, rather than leaving the field or protesting in any way.

From a leadership perspective, Herman couldn’t have handled this situation any worse, but right now the fallout from the song is the least of his concerns.

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

As you can imagine, we’ve been talking to sources of all stripes of late. We keep a handy little Google Doc where we store everything we hear, no matter how minor. It makes it easier to keep track of the situation, plus it makes it rather clear where the information overlaps and corroborates.

What we can share we will, and also tell you how much credence we give it. We’ll base that either on how many times we’ve heard it, or by who told us. You’re only as good as your sources and some sources are better than others. You’re also as bad as their agendas, but it’s typically not hard to read through agendas. Step 1 is caring to do so.

Scenario 1: The U in the title of this Humidor, you know, the strong, centralizing figure, is in play.

This is a delicate subject but if you think we would have hinted in his direction in the Scoop just for the fun of it, you haven’t been reading closely. In the span of 10 days we’ve gone from ’he will never coach at Texas,’ to Lee Corso’s favorite saying. We think the trilateral commission of president, AD, and BoR, would sign off on such a hire. Del Conte‘s mindset isn’t to win at all costs, but it’s to win at a lot of them. If he never coaches at Texas, it isn’t because he was found to be unsavory.

Credence: Money could become an issue. So too could another job potentially popping up. If this hire wasn’t doable word would have filtered out by now. If you want him to be the hire, no news is good news for now.

Scenario 2: No deal can be struck with option #1, due to financial constraints Herman returns.

I’ve heard this a couple of times, including on Thursday, and from somebody I hold in high regard. The thinking is money is just too tight to make a move unless it’s for a sure thing and there aren’t many sure things beyond death, taxes, and FITH.

Credence: We believe the money for action will be there when it’s needed. Herman doesn’t have many allies, and at this point, we can’t see this scenario unless he goes on a big winning streak, and by that, we mean probably the rest of the games. Absent a very impressive run of games, the only way he’d return is if the boosters didn’t want to foot the bill for his buyout. You can probably recall what we’ve been writing about how the boosters view Herman. Del Conte would have to rustle up a really bad alternative to Herman for the boosters to sit on their wallets. That’s highly unlikely, even in what looks like a limited field. The recruiting situation is also a factor that favors change, that is: the 2021 class is in poor shape, but 2022 can still be great.

Scenario 3: No deal can be struck with option #1, comprehensive search ensues.

Comprehensive search doesn’t mean you begin in late November and extend it well into December. Del Conte should be operating on this track in tandem with Scenario #1. I’m sure he is to some degree. We’ve heard a couple names of interest. We’ll hold them for now. One is widely mentioned; one we haven’t seen mentioned yet. That’ll give you something to ponder this weekend.

Credence: This scenario could definitely take place. It might even be the most likely depending on how you view Scenario 1.

For now there’s no job opening and it isn’t truly guaranteed it will open. But, if Del Conte doesn’t make a move, all those cardboard cutouts you currently see in stadiums nationwide will come in handy as the school opens its newly expanded stadium next fall. Now that sounds costly.

BAYLOR LOOMS?

The Baylor Bears currently sit at 2-3. That’s two games played and three games postponed for the 1-1 Bears. Next week’s game between Texas and Baylor is under question. I don’t even know what’s public on their situation, but I’ve heard the big issue is contact tracing. It appears they finally got good usage out of all those ankle monitors. Yeah, you just turn those suckers on and you know where people are at all times.

Something is clearly broken with how first-year head coach Dave Aranda has gone about defending against Covid. We’ll see if they can get things under control in time to play a week from Saturday.

Of course Texas is preparing as if the game will be played. We’ve heard practices have been great and there’s a real sense of urgency. That’s not true, we didn’t hear either of those things, but we have heard some positives whether fans want those positives to exist or not.

Within the team, there's a strong group that is vocal about winning out. The names won’t surprise you: Sam Ehlinger, Joseph Ossai, Josh Thompson, and Keondre Coburn have all been singled out for their vocal leadership. These players are making a concerted effort to keep the team positive and eager to prepare for Baylor.

Frankly, we were expecting to hear about a fractured team, one that has started to tune out the coaches but that is not the case. The players still believe in the coaches and vice versa. The sense on the team is the coaches are doing a better job of putting players in positions to make plays than fans think. The players blame themselves for lack of discipline, mental errors, and letting their technique get away from them. There is a palpable sense of accountability with the players.

Tom Herman made sure to have energetic practices this week by practicing good on good. The first team defense and first team offense went against each other in hopes of improving team discipline. You don’t have to play as sharp or with as much intensity practicing against the scout team.

Of course they’ve spent a lot of time working on technique and fundamentals. None of this is meant to make you think they’re improving, or they’ll win out, it’s just to tell you how they‘ve spent their time.

On the downside, we’ve heard the head coach is too involved on the offensive side of the ball, which is pretty evident watching the games. Herman has a governor on ”offensive coordinator” Mike Yurcich. Herman basically admitted that in his postgame press conference when he groveled about tempo. We may go into more detail here at another point in time.

Aside coverage busts the feeling behind the scenes is the defense continues to show improvement. I mentioned to a source they looked tired in Dallas and got back a derisive, “they were on the field too much.” Not-so-complementary football, imo.

Many impatient fans are wondering why Herman hasn’t been fired yet. Aside the obvious, he’s only four games into the season, we’d say it’s because he hasn’t lost the team.

A couple weeks ago we wrote a piece about the 2018 class titled “It’s now or next year.” It was written within the context of the TCU, OU, Baylor, Oklahoma State four game stretch. For Tom Herman, it’s now or never starting with the next two games.

On the downside, we’ve heard the head coach is too involved on the offensive side of the ball, which is pretty evident watching the games. Herman has a governor on ”offensive coordinator” Mike Yurcich. Herman basically admitted that in his postgame press conference when he groveled about tempo. We may go into more detail here at another point in time.

if you are going to do that why didn't you just keep Tim Beck?

no, seriously. what is the point of bringing in Yurcich (who is absolutely a known quantity), paying him that much over that many years guaranteed then putting a governor on him?

what a fucking moron.

RGBIII · October 16, 2020

8 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Yeah, I want to elaborate on this for clarity so folks can at least understand what they agree or disagree with me about on this subject. I've spoilered for those uninterested, as it's long.

Reveal hidden contents

Outside of Barry Switzer and Jackie Sherrill, there haven't been a bunch of coaches that reveled in cheating. Mike Dubose and Kirby Smart, I guess, might fit this. Guys like Meyer and Saban are pragmatists without a giant moral compass - cheating was a means to an end. At places like Alabama and Auburn, "if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'" isn't just a pithy axiom, it's fucking mantra. That creates a regional atmosphere in which there are no excuses with other schools not to be competitive by doing the same as well.

So Meyer went from relatively clean experiences at CSU, Notre Dame, Bowling Green, and Utah, to "WTF is going here?!?" and new choices when he showed up at UF. Saban had indoctrinated LSU into a new age of sophistication with cheating before heading out to Miami. LSU, as a community from fans and players up to the top of the state admin following the program, welcome that shit. Auburn was right there with them and FSU and Bowden cheated how they wanted, when they wanted. Bama was beating the shit out of Mike Shula to do more of it and he wasn't. Zook, out of desperation, took to it really quickly and talent acquisition wasn't ever his problem.

So at UF, Urban Meyer made a choice, and an easy one, and then took it to a new level because of his staff's native evaluation and recruiting capabilities without the intoxicant of "whatever it takes". That subsequently led to titles. It also led to a Head Coach that ultimately hated his fucking team and was having panic attacks about being trapped in a doom loop that he could never escape. That was a problem for his wife, on top of everything else. Saban showing up at Bama and officially escalating the cheating to its own regional game was the cherry on top. He eventually found a way out.

Ohio State, of course, doesn't present the same problems. Michigan and Notre Dame are as naive and ignorant to cheating as Texas. All three of those schools have a dated, patrician view of talent acquisition being, in part, a byproduct of their prestige as institutions. We witness issues with this to this day at UT. PSU was scandal-laden at the time. Basically, the Big 10 represented just one big, giant pussy, waiting to be fucked. Enter Urban Meyer. Cheating at Ohio State is like cheating at USC. It's simply how business gets conducted when necessary, but we don't need to talk about such things or wallow in the slop like the rednecks in the south, amirite?

The big problem for Meyer at Ohio State is that he, or his base, was not going to be content just owning the Big 10. The narrative that the Big 10 couldn't compete with the warmer climate schools because the talent was too big and slow had worn the entire conference thin. So Meyer concluded immediately that they were going to import talent to Ohio from the warmer climates in order to not only own the Big 10, but out-athlete the SEC, USC, FSU, and the Big 12. Oregon is doing the same shit right now. Does that mean that Meyer loved the shit? No. It's dirty, even if you rationalize that these poor kids and their families need the money, it's still done under the cover of darkness and full of headaches, especially when some of these guys are straight up being sold to programs by street agents and/or parents.

So if the guy comes to Texas, will he cheat? I hope so. I'm past my own innocence regarding how it all works in CFB. There are going to be difference makers like Jaylen Waddle, Marvin Wilson, and Demarvion Leal who are straight up going to be bid out. Bama bought Waddle for $80k. Wilson went for something similar with the same Will Lyles-led crew handling his auction. Leal went for something straight to the mom. They were all worth it to the programs, as you've witnessed by their performances, if you've been paying to CFB for the past 5 years. Urban Meyer or not, those guys aren't come to Texas just because Urban Meyer has Texas on the upswing.

But will he have to cheat as much? No, and he won't be encouraged to do so. Also, the landscape continues to change and as the NIL stuff emerges as a weapon, Texas is at least correctly viewing that as an arms race and plans to win there, as they should. Even with Texas being a laughingstock in CFB and CBB for a decade, the eyeballs, merchandise sales, revenue, exposure and so forth are all still built in and only get crazier nationally when Texas is good.

Herman is flatly and obviously not genuine. Even guys completely wowed by his gimmicks will eventually see through to the true narcissist underneath. When that happens, they'll see the obvious - he doesn't give a shit about anyone else but himself.

Texas going all in on playing the game with Urban Meyer at the helm is every single one of our rivals worst nightmares. Which is exactly why it HAS to happen

shnsajax · October 16, 2020

3 hours ago, drifter379 said:

I think it’s a given that we would win with Meyer. But is it worth selling our souls.
When he decides to quit or gets fired over sanctions in 3-4 years will we be in any better position than we are right now?

I don’t know who the right guy is for this program but I throw up in my mouth a little bit thinking about seeing Urban Meyer in burnt orange on the sidelines.

Js1 · October 16, 2020

2 hours ago, TotallyLegit said:

Story checks out.

Don't we have a regularly scheduled game on December 5? What happens if one of our other games (besides Baylor/Ok State as they got postponed to the 12th) gets moved to the 12th?

LTtxfan · October 16, 2020

10 minutes ago, BrazilHorn said:

Hire Urban, give Herman a red slingline and a can of bug spray and move his ass to the basement. Once Dec 1st comes fire his ass. Maybe make him UT's liaison to Uzbekistan if basement seems too cushy.

Mensa...

C-Man · October 16, 2020

9 hours ago, Happy Gilmore said:

Don't know how reliable this Texans7 guy is on 24/7 but he did call Guilbeau (not really a shot per say..) and the most recent OL commit.

Here we go... Says that there's one and only one choice that being Urban Meyer. Money is there. New coach will be announced Dec 1st.

Feel like it's Lotus under a new handle... But fuck it today was slow in the rumor mill department.

8 hours ago, hornfromdallas said:

guess the news is finally starting to leak out

Hide contents

players have been talking about it all week

NoName · October 16, 2020

9 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Herman is flatly and obviously not genuine. Even guys completely wowed by his gimmicks will eventually see through to the true narcissist underneath. When that happens, they'll see the obvious - he doesn't give a shit about anyone else but himself.

Tom Herman is that guy who thinks he is the smartest person in the room, pulling the wool over everyone's eyes but the second he walks out everyone rolls their eyes says "Thank God" under their breaths and commence having a good time.

At least Charlie Strong was seemingly a likeable dude. We know Mack at least appeared to be.

It's hard to be an asshole of that magnitude.

Bluemoon3287 · October 16, 2020

There’s a man who has his facts straight and provides details. I like it ! How about Treefidy for coitch if we can’t get the Urbs?

closetohumping · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, NoName said:

Tom Herman is that guy who thinks he is the smartest person in the room, pulling the wool over everyone's eyes but the second he walks out everyone rolls their eyes says "Thank God" under their breaths and commence having a good time.

At least Charlie Strong was seemingly a likeable dude. We know Mack at least appeared to be.

It's hard to be an asshole of that magnitude.

Charlie is more likable than Tom. But, I don't think he's as great a guy as some make him out to be.

NoName · October 16, 2020

Just now, closetohumping said:

Charlie is more likable than Tom. But, I don't think he's as great a guy as some make him out to be.

I'm not talking about him as a great guy...we've all heard the rumors...just that he is a likeable guy.

TrashMaster G · October 16, 2020

15 minutes ago, BrazilHorn said:

Hire Urban, give Herman a red slingline and a can of bug spray and move his ass to the basement. Once Dec 1st comes fire his ass. Maybe make him UT's liaison to Uzbekistan if basement seems too cushy.

It's a red Swingline, you Philistine.

totallynotabuttpirate · October 16, 2020

Just now, closetohumping said:

Charlie is more likable than Tom. But, I don't think he's as great a guy as some make him out to be.

Yea, just ask the dude whose wife he banged.

Thiefery · October 16, 2020

6 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

Yea, just ask the dude whose wife he banged.

She loved him.. hence why she bought him a Movado watch

RGBIII · October 16, 2020

FCB has another Herman article up if anyone has a 247 sub

closetohumping · October 16, 2020

12 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

Yea, just ask the dude whose wife he banged.

Yea some advice from a relative old like me. If your wife is giving another dude a Rolex, it's probably not because of his impressive work with Bridgewater and Harry Douglas

Edited October 16, 2020 by closetohumping

Treefidy · October 16, 2020

11 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

Texas going all in on playing the game with Urban Meyer at the helm is every single one of our rivals worst nightmares. Which is exactly why it HAS to happen

And aggy will completely implode, that will be fun. The absolute dejection from my aggy acquaintances and friends who thought they had finally surpassed us by being able to steal a MNC winning coach...

Thiefery · October 16, 2020

Just now, closetohumping said:

Yea some advice from a relative old like me. If your wife is giving another dude a Rolex, it's probably not because of your impressive work with Bridgewater and Harry Douglas

closetohumping · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, Thiefery said:

1. I was trying to give your wives more credit.

2. Movado? Damn Kentucky is tacky as fuck. Thank God this is Texas

RGBIII · October 16, 2020

2 minutes ago, Treefidy said:

And aggy will completely implode, that will be fun. The absolute dejection from my aggy acquaintances and friends who thought they had finally surpassed us by being able to steal a MNC winning coach...

Funny you say that, talked to an aggy buddy yesterday about this scenario and he said “would be my worst nightmare. We would have to go out of state for nearly every recruit, plus play an SEC schedule with at least two guaranteed losses and pay Jimbo all this money just to finish third in the SEC west every year while Texas gets a free pass to the CFP every single year”. It hasn’t happened yet but the thought alone is just beautiful

MoJames · October 16, 2020

3 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

Funny you say that, talked to an aggy buddy yesterday about this scenario and he said “would be my worst nightmare. We would have to go out of state for nearly every recruit, plus play an SEC schedule with at least two guaranteed losses and pay Jimbo all this money just to finish third in the SEC west every year while Texas gets a free pass to the CFP every single year”. It hasn’t happened yet but the thought alone is just beautiful

Thiefery · October 16, 2020

8 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

Funny you say that, talked to an aggy buddy yesterday about this scenario and he said “would be my worst nightmare. We would have to go out of state for nearly every recruit, plus play an SEC schedule with at least two guaranteed losses and pay Jimbo all this money just to finish third in the SEC west every year while Texas gets a free pass to the CFP every single year”. It hasn’t happened yet but the thought alone is just beautiful

how high is he riding off that FL win? One of the two dipshit aggy people I know is sky high on this team and this season.. he actually thinks the Bama loss was a fluke, they would win for certain if they ever rematched..smh.. I don't say shit anymore, Fuck you Tom

*The other really isn't a dipshit*

Edited October 16, 2020 by Thiefery

BrazilHorn · October 16, 2020

27 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

It's a red Swingline, you Philistine.

shit, knew I was going too fast. Herman sucks so bad I am getting him a cheap Chinese knockoff

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