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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread

Prepuce of Doom

By Prepuce of Doom
in Movies and TV

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Dennis Taylor
Dennis Taylor

So, like an OnlyFansville? 

Goo Punch
Goo Punch

man FUCK all of these bullshit-ass holiday commercials trying to tug at your fuckin heart strings like that has fucking dick to do with buying a car or a computer or whatever. this latest one i saw wa

Jameslaw121
Jameslaw121

The other day at work, we had about 10-12 people in out lobby - probably 20' by 30' room, but the cleaning crew was trying to finish vacuuming. I was trying to get people out of their way when one of

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 54278

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15 hours ago, Goo Punch said:

"Steve is paying for four streaming video services and nine music apps that he isn't using!" well steve sounds like a retard, and nothing he does makes me want to bank with wells fargo.

also, shouts out to verizon for using another dumbass stuck in a tree to convince we to buy their shit. who the fuck came up with these ads?

Obviously the same people who came up with the Discover Card ad that has the dude calling Discover to cancel because he won't pay an annual fee, presumably the first thing that anyone would notice when they signed up for a credit card.    

I posted this earlier in this thread -- I don't get it either... Seeing that your customers are morons is supposed to make me want to be a customer???

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hayden_horn

hayden_horn 11362

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1 minute ago, Beau Vine said:

Obviously the same people who came up with the Discover Card ad that has the dude calling Discover to cancel because he won't pay an annual fee, presumably the first thing that anyone would notice when they signed up for a credit card.    

I posted this earlier in this thread -- I don't get it either... Seeing that your customers are morons is supposed to make me want to be a customer???

beyond that, what's the marketing strategy behind getting two lookalikes to have a conversation about a fictional annual fee?

it's the weirdest shit.

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DougO

DougO 5251

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That fakeass poser hipster band in the commercial for the Crone's disease drug. Carefully selected members to fit the necessary demographics of modern hipsterdom drek, with stage moves inspired by Elaine from Seinfeld.

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Goo Punch

Goo Punch 4275

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i really think that the people who run the chevy ads are not only fully aware of how much we all hate this guy, but that they've strategically decided to ramp it up a notch just to upset people even more and keep them talking about the ads.

"ok, so how can we make this guy even more douchey and unlikeable?"

"how about at the end of the ad we have him look over his shoulder and directly into the camera, like, 'do I even need to say any more?"

"yah that'll work."

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Lhorn

Lhorn 4920

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5 hours ago, Deej said:

Streaming Hulu, and they keep playing the Nike ad encouraging  young female athletes to end the gender gap. 

I'm guessing they haven't seen a WNBA game.

Kudos to Nike.  Bout time someone told these lazy, entitled bitches to step it up.  We've been telling women for years that they can do anything men can do, but do it better.  That a gender gap exists can only be a result of their shameful effort.  Thank you Nike 

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Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 21088

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19 hours ago, DougO said:

That fakeass poser hipster band in the commercial for the Crone's disease drug. Carefully selected members to fit the necessary demographics of modern hipsterdom drek, with stage moves inspired by Elaine from Seinfeld.

Pay close attention to how she sings. It's apparently all just one single undivided noise.

I hate this commercial more and more with each exposure. 

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Knoxtnhorn

Knoxtnhorn 6061

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8 hours ago, PokerFace said:

How has no one brought up the Google Pixel commercial with Awkwafina and 2 Chainz? Her voice makes me want to stick an icepick in my ears.

Oh, so that's a real thing?  I thought it was the same Asian as from the Discover card commercial (where the twins are talking to one another.)  /not racist

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ButtFumble

ButtFumble 5180

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On 5/21/2019 at 10:41 PM, Dennis Taylor said:

Chevy pitchman:" plug this in"

(Light comes on)

Mystified simpletons: "Ooohh,  ahhh!"

better yet the breaker switch noise for the others is like they are throwing a breaker to start up a enough lights to light a refinery not a small garage

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RPM

RPM 26326

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3 hours ago, ButtFumble said:

better yet the breaker switch noise for the others is like they are throwing a breaker to start up a enough lights to light a refinery not a small garage

Well to be fair, it's GM technology.

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Goo Punch

Goo Punch 4275

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they have a head & shoulders commercial out now where we see a male pats fan and a female steelers fan sitting next each other at a game where the two rival fans get put on the kiss cam together. the chick, emboldened by using head & shoulders shampoo, decides to grab the guy by the face and give him a big ole open mouth kiss, to the delight of everyone around them.

all i could think about was how enraged everyone would be if the exact same commercial were made with the guy grabbing the girl by the face and going to town. steelers chick would have become the face of the #metoo movement. 

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Lhorn

Lhorn 4920

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I think you are right. I’m not nuts about the double standards in social media, commercials etc. If there is a “bad guy”, dumbass or butt of the joke in a commercial it has to be this race or sex and never that race because heads will explode.  

I think the scenario you describe (i haven’t seen the commercial) probably mirrors life a bit however.  If an random guy kisses a woman in public, unless he’s Leonardo DiCaprio he’s probably getting dragged out by security. If a beautiful random woman kisses a guy he thinks he’s gonna get some strange or is more likely to see it as benign.  

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TheStoicPaisano

TheStoicPaisano 9922

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On 5/29/2019 at 5:50 PM, Goo Punch said:

they have a head & shoulders commercial out now where we see a male pats fan and a female steelers fan sitting next each other at a game where the two rival fans get put on the kiss cam together. the chick, emboldened by using head & shoulders shampoo, decides to grab the guy by the face and give him a big ole open mouth kiss, to the delight of everyone around them.

all i could think about was how enraged everyone would be if the exact same commercial were made with the guy grabbing the girl by the face and going to town. steelers chick would have become the face of the #metoo movement. 

You’re really gonna love the lesbian prom one.

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DougO

DougO 5251

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On 5/29/2019 at 5:50 PM, Goo Punch said:

they have a head & shoulders commercial out now where we see a male pats fan and a female steelers fan sitting next each other at a game where the two rival fans get put on the kiss cam together. the chick, emboldened by using head & shoulders shampoo, decides to grab the guy by the face and give him a big ole open mouth kiss, to the delight of everyone around them.

all i could think about was how enraged everyone would be if the exact same commercial were made with the guy grabbing the girl by the face and going to town. steelers chick would have become the face of the #metoo movement. 

Judges always cheat for the stealers anyway.

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Deej

Deej 76842

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On 5/21/2019 at 10:55 PM, DougO said:

That fakeass poser hipster band in the commercial for the Crone's disease drug. Carefully selected members to fit the necessary demographics of modern hipsterdom drek, with stage moves inspired by Elaine from Seinfeld.

They shit themselves literally and figuratively on-stage.

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TheStoicPaisano

TheStoicPaisano 9922

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10 minutes ago, youdunnf'dup said:

I don’t have a problem with Verlander, and I’ll admit that this has a lot more to do with having MLB.tv and it being every other commercial that they play for some reason, but this:

 

 

Lulz I had the same reaction, he seems like the most milquetoast person ever. And MLB.tv sucks at programming the commercials; they don’t have a huge rotation to begin with and it seems haphazard what plays when. Sick of the Jason C. Firefighter/Gillette ad.

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elfenix

elfenix 34328

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On 5/27/2019 at 9:11 PM, Trey3216 said:

What the hell is up with these new Dos XX commercials.  Absolutely annoying 

see, what happened was, they had one of the best ad campaigns in tv over the last couple decades, decided to change it up because reasons, failed miserably, and now are flailing around with no fucking clue what to do since they're all a bunch of morons who intentionally killed the golden goose.  but you don't make senior partner at the ad agency if you just keep coming up with more commercials in the exact same campaign, so fuck it.

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Trey3216

Trey3216 15349

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34 minutes ago, elfenix said:

see, what happened was, they had one of the best ad campaigns in tv over the last couple decades, decided to change it up because reasons, failed miserably, and now are flailing around with no fucking clue what to do since they're all a bunch of morons who intentionally killed the golden goose.  but you don't make senior partner at the ad agency if you just keep coming up with more commercials in the exact same campaign, so fuck it.

Precisely. What a load of aggy shit 

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youdunnf'dup

youdunnf'dup 2147

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1 hour ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

Lulz I had the same reaction, he seems like the most milquetoast person ever. And MLB.tv sucks at programming the commercials; they don’t have a huge rotation to begin with and it seems haphazard what plays when. Sick of the Jason C. Firefighter/Gillette ad.

When he’s pitching he definitely has some fire. And he started dating Kate Upton in her prime, so I’ll give him that.  But jesus, man lol. I can recite this commercial verbatim. They play it every half inning of every game. Or that’s what it seems like, at least. It’s ridiculous 

Edited by youdunnf'dup
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Horn80

Horn80 6131

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On 5/22/2019 at 6:40 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Pay close attention to how she sings. It's apparently all just one single undivided noise.

I hate this commercial more and more with each exposure. 

But, but the drama if she will make the stage!

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Deej

Deej 76842

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On 6/8/2019 at 6:52 PM, lemonandaturd said:

Here in Austin, every Scott Elder used car commercial is a beating.   The shotgun wielding cowboy in "Used Cars" had a much better sales pitch.  

Hey, now...he's the Mitsubishi dealer these days. 

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ztejas

ztejas 43496

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There's some world cup/soccer commercial featuring chicks playing (think Alex Morgan is shown scoring a goal). It then cuts to like 2 seconds of Messi watching the clip on his phone nodding and smiling. 

I don't have a problem with the ad, but I need to know the $ amount that Messi was paid for that 2 seconds of screentime. I want this information. 

Edited by ztejas
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