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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread

Prepuce of Doom

By Prepuce of Doom
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AUS-97HORN

AUS-97HORN 11758

Posted
Posted (edited)
33 minutes ago, mycox said:

Pizza commercials saying they guarantee no one will touch your pizza once it's out of the oven. Ummm...thanks? This is now a thing since March 2020?

remember that the average IQ of an American is a fucking 98.  Thats average.... meaning half the motherfuckers in this country are 98 or below.

They have to be told shit like this because they honestly dont think about/know it. 

 

 

as for the Pharma commercials.... In less than the last week ive now counted no less than  *SEVEN*  fucking commercials for different brand name drugs that claim they can fix psoriasis. 

dont believe me?  Skyrizi, Talz, Enbrel, humira, Tremfya, Illumya & Stelara

 

SEVEN.     and the absolute worst commercial is the fucking skyrizi one where they made a god damned jingle that claims, and I quote..... "Nothing is everything"

Edited by AUS-97HORN
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Dennis Taylor
Dennis Taylor

So, like an OnlyFansville? 

Goo Punch
Goo Punch

man FUCK all of these bullshit-ass holiday commercials trying to tug at your fuckin heart strings like that has fucking dick to do with buying a car or a computer or whatever. this latest one i saw wa

Jameslaw121
Jameslaw121

The other day at work, we had about 10-12 people in out lobby - probably 20' by 30' room, but the cleaning crew was trying to finish vacuuming. I was trying to get people out of their way when one of

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Dennis Taylor

Dennis Taylor 18818

Posted
Posted
On 4/17/2020 at 3:06 PM, mycox said:

Pizza commercials saying they guarantee no one will touch your pizza once it's out of the oven. Ummm...thanks? This is now a thing since March 2020?

do you really want to know the answer to that?

Spoiler

are you sure? 

Spoiler

https://www.kvue.com/article/news/local/police-georgetown-pizza-worker-placed-private-parts-on-pie/269-310045726

 

 

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Trey3216

Trey3216 15346

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, hundredTT said:

Been binge watching Naked and Afraid. Almost every break they play those “save the dogs” commercials with the sad music and are like 3 fucking minutes long. Rage. 

Yeah, the Saturday Criminal Minds marathon was like repeatedly hitting your fingers with a sledgehammer 

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Deamerxt

Deamerxt 51

Posted
Posted (edited)

This fucking prick.

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/n78K/troy-bilt-save-50-on-the-reliable-pony-42-song-by-a-ha

I hope he falls UNDER his own mower and it shreds the ever-loving shit out of him. Not enough to die right away, of course. He needs to still be bleeding out on his perfectly manicured lawn about 20 minutes later when his entire neighborhood (maybe even the whole county) gets fucking carpet bombed straight to hell.

Edited by Deamerxt
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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted
On 4/19/2020 at 2:05 PM, Deej said:

Not a commercial, but I get an email from my bank telling me what they are doing to prevent the spread of coronavirus. All my banking is done remotely. Protect me from from fraud, motherfuckers.

Yes, banks...particularly their branches are proving more worthless than usual.  Got a warning of a fraud alert in the D.C. area again.  somebody trying to use a CC# same as mine so they processed two and froze the last two.  Exchange was just brilliant.

"So you are disputing the charges?"
"Yeah, I wasn't in D.C."

"You weren't there for business or leisure?
"During a pandemic lockdown, you think I went to take in the Washington Monument?"

"Well sir, we have to ask because it could have been a last-minute decision to travel there."
"Okay, assume I traveled there....did you see charges for airline tickets, or gas stations between here and D.C., or a hotel, or anything else associated with travel?"
"Well no, just these two purchases at Best Buy.  travelers often need last minute electronics or smart devices while traveling for work."

"What does it say I bought at Best Buy?  

"A laptop computer.  And a 60" flat screen TV."

"Uh-huh, and a 60" TV seems like something I'd fly back home with from D.C?"

If they added one part of common sense to their fraud protection systems, half the identity fraud would be gone.  But the Best Buy employees were in on it (it wasn't the card itself, it was my info made to get a quick in-store credit).  And Wells Fargo doesn't give a shit because they buy insurance against their own fraud detection to cover their losses.  

 

Anyway, I don't like the way the guy looks in the new KIA ads here in Austin.  He looks like he has a fat guy's meth problem. 

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NorthLoop

NorthLoop 14195

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Posted
On 5/5/2020 at 8:28 PM, Lobo said:

Yes, banks...particularly their branches are proving more worthless than usual.  Got a warning of a fraud alert in the D.C. area again.  somebody trying to use a CC# same as mine so they processed two and froze the last two.  Exchange was just brilliant.

"So you are disputing the charges?"
"Yeah, I wasn't in D.C."

"You weren't there for business or leisure?
"During a pandemic lockdown, you think I went to take in the Washington Monument?"

"Well sir, we have to ask because it could have been a last-minute decision to travel there."
"Okay, assume I traveled there....did you see charges for airline tickets, or gas stations between here and D.C., or a hotel, or anything else associated with travel?"
"Well no, just these two purchases at Best Buy.  travelers often need last minute electronics or smart devices while traveling for work."

"What does it say I bought at Best Buy?  

"A laptop computer.  And a 60" flat screen TV."

"Uh-huh, and a 60" TV seems like something I'd fly back home with from D.C?"

If they added one part of common sense to their fraud protection systems, half the identity fraud would be gone.  But the Best Buy employees were in on it (it wasn't the card itself, it was my info made to get a quick in-store credit).  And Wells Fargo doesn't give a shit because they buy insurance against their own fraud detection to cover their losses.  

 

Anyway, I don't like the way the guy looks in the new KIA ads here in Austin.  He looks like he has a fat guy's meth problem. 

Lol your first mistake was banking with WF. 

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hundredTT

hundredTT 578

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, BayouBill said:

The new progressive commercials with the councelor helping people not be like their parents is pretty good stuff. The lady talking on her speaker phone at the store and the guys looking at the blue hair guy is great.

I enjoy those too. But still fuck progressive for those “Jaime” commercials where he leaves himself voicemails. I swear they come on every break when I listen to sports shows on IHeartRadio. I will roundhouse that motherfucker if I ever see him in person. 

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Deej

Deej 76768

Posted
Posted

What's with the commercial (don't even know what it's for) with some computer animated girl telling some real girl thank you for helping her when she was being bullied or something. Was Max Headroom being an asshole towards her?

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Dennis Taylor

Dennis Taylor 18818

Posted
Posted
11 minutes ago, Deej said:

What's with the commercial (don't even know what it's for) with some computer animated girl telling some real girl thank you for helping her when she was being bullied or something. Was Max Headroom being an asshole towards her?

Never seen it. Maybe its on your favorite pron site. If so, its for touching yourself 

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mr. sunshine

mr. sunshine 2825

Posted
Posted
On 5/5/2020 at 8:28 PM, Lobo said:

Yes, banks...particularly their branches are proving more worthless than usual.  Got a warning of a fraud alert in the D.C. area again.  somebody trying to use a CC# same as mine so they processed two and froze the last two.  Exchange was just brilliant.

"So you are disputing the charges?"
"Yeah, I wasn't in D.C."

"You weren't there for business or leisure?
"During a pandemic lockdown, you think I went to take in the Washington Monument?"

"Well sir, we have to ask because it could have been a last-minute decision to travel there."
"Okay, assume I traveled there....did you see charges for airline tickets, or gas stations between here and D.C., or a hotel, or anything else associated with travel?"
"Well no, just these two purchases at Best Buy.  travelers often need last minute electronics or smart devices while traveling for work."

"What does it say I bought at Best Buy?  

"A laptop computer.  And a 60" flat screen TV."

"Uh-huh, and a 60" TV seems like something I'd fly back home with from D.C?"

If they added one part of common sense to their fraud protection systems, half the identity fraud would be gone.  But the Best Buy employees were in on it (it wasn't the card itself, it was my info made to get a quick in-store credit).  And Wells Fargo doesn't give a shit because they buy insurance against their own fraud detection to cover their losses.  

 

Anyway, I don't like the way the guy looks in the new KIA ads here in Austin.  He looks like he has a fat guy's meth problem. 

About 15 years ago some parolee in Illinois, which I’ve never visited, gathered enough of my personal info to open credit lines in my name. Among other things he bought a plasma TV at a Circuit City in Chicago. My wife called and managed to speak to the salesman who sold him the TV. Fucker sold him another one the next day 

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RPM

RPM 26319

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Lhorn said:

I kinda like the Geico commercial about the new homeowners with the Ratt problem.  I think their next commercial should be new homeowners with a W.A.S.P. problem.

I have a serious issue with the clogging problem. I could permanently fix that in under a minute.

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RamjetFDO

RamjetFDO 10575

Posted
Posted

The Vuse (ecig) commercial with the (worse than usual) self-referential rap ...

Unstoppable!
Who us? Yes!
Passion. Check!
Drive. Check!

Can't believe these are still being marketed, and so blatantly to a particular audience like this. Couple that with such bad music and lyrics that only the most out-of-touch Larry Tate/Darren Stevens ad agency could've thought this would be cool.

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lemonandaturd

lemonandaturd 4285

Posted
Posted

I don't care for the Good Rx commercial with the poor woman dragging her two kids to the pharmacy and fretting about the cost of her kid's medicine.  Then she hands the pharmacist her $1,000 smart phone to look up Good RX discounts.  Her priorities are straight no doubt.   

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elfenix

elfenix 34238

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Posted

fuck these lit mobile power bank unboxing ads.   that fat fucking thing is so packed full of features (charge your phone 8 times! flashlight! solar charging! wireless charging! micro usb charging (wtf? it's 2020 where's usb C?), carabiner loop) that they forgot the most important feature which is being able to carry the fucking thing without a sherpa. 

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AUS-97HORN

AUS-97HORN 11758

Posted
Posted

just saw my first copper MASK commercial.....   all the other copper stuff is annoying as hell, but this fucking one is just rage inducing

 

what in the fuck is copper going to solve in my mask?        at least they could have made it 4 masks for $20 or something.

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Al Czervik

Al Czervik 1229

Posted
Posted
23 hours ago, AUS-97HORN said:

Fuck Sam Adams.

 

I really like their beer, but these new Boston cousin commercials are fucking horribad. 

Al has many cousins from Boston, fortunately none are like this douche in the commercials.  But Al has seen plenty of guys like this, Peter Griffins are a dime a dozen up there too.  However, the commercials are a little spot on and entertaining.  

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DougO

DougO 5245

Posted
Posted
On 5/5/2020 at 8:28 PM, Lobo said:

Yes, banks...particularly their branches are proving more worthless than usual.  Got a warning of a fraud alert in the D.C. area again.  somebody trying to use a CC# same as mine so they processed two and froze the last two.  Exchange was just brilliant.

"So you are disputing the charges?"
"Yeah, I wasn't in D.C."

"You weren't there for business or leisure?
"During a pandemic lockdown, you think I went to take in the Washington Monument?"

"Well sir, we have to ask because it could have been a last-minute decision to travel there."
"Okay, assume I traveled there....did you see charges for airline tickets, or gas stations between here and D.C., or a hotel, or anything else associated with travel?"
"Well no, just these two purchases at Best Buy.  travelers often need last minute electronics or smart devices while traveling for work."

"What does it say I bought at Best Buy?  

"A laptop computer.  And a 60" flat screen TV."

"Uh-huh, and a 60" TV seems like something I'd fly back home with from D.C?"

If they added one part of common sense to their fraud protection systems, half the identity fraud would be gone.  But the Best Buy employees were in on it (it wasn't the card itself, it was my info made to get a quick in-store credit).  And Wells Fargo doesn't give a shit because they buy insurance against their own fraud detection to cover their losses.  

 

Anyway, I don't like the way the guy looks in the new KIA ads here in Austin.  He looks like he has a fat guy's meth problem. 

 

I got a Best Buy card a few years when buying a TV, to get an extra discount. I'll never do that again. Worst card ever, terrible service, the website is crap, they kept shifting access to the site and integrating with BB page, etc...

Just say no.

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mr. sunshine

mr. sunshine 2825

Posted
Posted (edited)

Prescription otezla. Because you really, really want to show off your lobster earrings repeatedly to your friends, food truck employees and the general public. Because you’re going to eat some lobster, you’re a rebel and YOU’VE GOT LOBSTER EARRINGS ON GODDAMMIT

Edited by mr. sunshine
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