9.3.18 Coach Herman press conference (Noon)

[Sheep Have Wool 1,053]

4 minutes ago, Goodman said:

Sam is mentally broken not actually good at college-level football and needs to RS this year use up his eligibility or transfer as quickly as possible, only way to get over his mental yips here a solid QB.

FIFY

[phdhorn 6,224]

Don't know, but keep watching.  Maybe it'll feature Tom Herman trying to pull a win out of his ass.

[Doc Sam Beckett 5,792]

7 minutes ago, bigup2dahorns said:

So in summary: no pizza question

[LonghornGoodfella 114]

Not sure why anyone was hoping or expecting anything different. The coaching staff is clueless and the media is more concerned about not losing their access so no tough questions are asked. 

[Bluemoon3287 56]

What the hell - give the HC to Orlando and bring in Kings Kliffsberry as the OC and quaterback recruiter - to hell with it

[campcrunk 2,438]

45 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

You know what happens to Lenny at the end of Of Mice and Men....

“I can still tend the rabbits, Mr. Del Conte? I didn't mean no harm, Mr. Del Conte.”

[Red Five 40,846]

If the team is wound so tight that they come out in the opener looking comatose, that’s 100% on the head coach. I get the feeling Tom doesn’t see it that way.

 

[phdhorn 6,224]

I'm still up here in College Park cleaning out my deceased mother's absolute galactically-sized junkpiles from her house we're fixing up, in 93 degree weather and 80% humidity.

And it appears it was still the better option over listening to that steaming pile of AIDS-infested bile.  Wow.

[Bluemoon3287 56]

Can anyone think of another QB in the Big 12 they wouldn’t rather have  ? For God’s sake, this kid is worse than last year....

[Sejjr 3,246]

Tom Herman is such a narcissistic d-bag. Of course, he starts the PC with a "look how smart I am" reference. This shit show is just getting started. Jesus...aggy has to be filling up a fucking water tower with all the extra jizz. Tom has lost a massive amount of fan support in a matter of days...I can't wait till he starts talking about "friends of the program." 

[ClubWhatever 12,120]

15 minutes ago, Goodman said:

Sam is mentally broken and needs to RS this year, only way to get over his mental yips here.

It’s not mental yips.  He’s just not a good college QB.  

[Coelenterate Fuccboi 13,091]

Saban’s discussion with Gary Johnson would have likely revolved around, “We sucked Gary! If don’t want this shitty feeling anymore, we need to hold each other accountable and stop sucking”.

[Agent 13 314]

So what does it actually take to become an accredited reporter for an entity? Why can't Surly have someone in the room asking questions? Obviously, said "reporter" would be outfitted in a fedora with an absurdly large camera complete with over-sized flash bulb.  He could go by the name "Chick" or something equivalent.

[The People’s Elbow 707]

7 minutes ago, Red Five said:

If the team is wound so tight that they come out in the opener looking comatose, that’s 100% on the head coach. I get the feeling Tom doesn’t see it that way.

 

It’s a chickenshit excuse to shift the blame to the team. Tom’s a fucking coward.

[Doc Sam Beckett 5,792]

3 minutes ago, Agent 13 said:

So what does it actually take to become an accredited reporter for an entity? Why can't Surly have someone in the room asking questions? Obviously, said "reporter" would be outfitted in a fedora with an absurdly large camera complete with over-sized flash bulb.  He could go by the name "Chick" or something equivalent.

Yes, Derka Goo from the Surl, what's your question? 

[Wally Pryor 5,261]

17 minutes ago, Goodman said:

Sam is mentally broken and needs to RS this year, only way to get over his mental yips here.

No amount of redshirting is going to address the fact that he's not a good D-1 quarterback, and that's not going to change.  With the worst of it being really shitty decision-making, especially when the game is on the line.   That's cancerous to your team and only an idiot would allow it to continue. 

Even if the idiot has a business card that says "Mensa" on it. 

[Surly Bevo 24,908]

2 minutes ago, Agent 13 said:

So what does it actually take to become an accredited reporter for an entity? Why can't Surly have someone in the room asking questions? Obviously, said "reporter" would be outfitted in a fedora with an absurdly large camera complete with over-sized flash bulb.  He could go by the name "Chick" or something equivalent.

We could outsource our questions to Scoops Callahan

 

 

[EE2B 1,565]

So I guess we still haven’t found the fucking fairy dust?

[Blotto 23,491]

2 minutes ago, Doc Sam Beckett said:

Yes, Derka Goo from the Surl, what's your question? 

We need to keep our secret weapon under wraps until it's time for the Shaka press conferences.

[FriendofaFriend 93]

So up until now "we are a 7-6 team till we prove other wise" but now we lose to Maryland and the loss is "not what defines us. Total BS

[Treefidy 1,463]

27 minutes ago, bschoolprof said:

I didn't think it was possible, but I actually feel much worse after watching that.  I was expecting Mack-like platitudes.  But that PC was very revealing:

1) Mensa has no fucking idea what to do, despite his claim that the staff gets paid to figure out the "whys"

2) He doesn't think they (the coaches) have done anything wrong.  He's going down with the ship with Sam and Beck in tow and fuck everyone else.  

He'll be gone in about 15 months.  

The part about tempo working because the players just got to go play and not think, and it worked.  Then "maybe we need to start games that way, I don't know". or close to that statement is all the evidence you need that he doesn't have a clue what the problem is or how to fix it.  

He needs to scale back the spending, maybe see if he can profit off some appreciated value in his home and downsize, leave most of the nonessentials boxed in storage and get on the phone with a financial advisor stat.  He's going to be back at a mid-major making 15-20% of his current salary before next Christmas. 

[bschoolprof 6,252]

3 minutes ago, Treefidy said:

He needs to scale back the spending, maybe see if he can profit off some appreciated value in his home and downsize, leave most of the nonessentials boxed in storage and get on the phone with a financial advisor stat.  He's going to be back at a mid-major making 15-20% of his current salary before next Christmas. 

We are going to pay him ~$25 million regardless of what happens.  I think he'll be fine.  

[David Dennison 18,851]

15 minutes ago, The People’s Elbow said:

It’s a chickenshit excuse to shift the blame to the team. Tom’s a fucking coward.

Yeah, that was bad. Throwing your team under the bus when it's clearly coaching decisions that are deficient is a terrible look.

[Tex Long 4,383]

3 minutes ago, bschoolprof said:

We are going to pay him ~$25 million regardless of what happens.  I think he'll be fine.  

Not necessarily. There could be more to his titty-bar adventures with Zach.

THK5S??

[GotThatFire 166]

 Was the “of mice and men” reference a way of saying the players are retarded? 

[Tex Long 4,383]

Just now, GotThatFire said:

 Was the “of mice and men” reference a way of saying the players are retarded? 

Here ya go, hold this rabbit.

[Redneck Mutha 7,954]

20 minutes ago, EE2B said:

So I guess we still haven’t found the fucking fairy dust?

Snorted it all up at the scrip club. 

[Red Five 40,846]

Also, of our 22 starters, 19 are upperclassmen. Good to know they supposedly completely freeze up at the thought of playing a football game, to the point where you’re comparing them to Lenny choking rabbits.

[scottsins 1,966]

6 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Also, of our 22 starters, 19 are upperclassmen. Good to know they supposedly completely freeze up at the thought of playing a football game, to the point where you’re comparing them to Lenny choking rabbits.

I would be really concerned about this issue, if it was legitimate and not just Mensa bullshit.

[runthebone 7,967]

1 hour ago, Skyline said:

...

 

 

John Burt...now that's a name I have not heard in a long, long time. 

[Tracer Bullet 183]

10 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

 Was the “of mice and men” reference a way of saying the players are retarded? 

It was Herman humblebragging that he's read Steinbeck novels

[TexasBeta 1,261]

It was Herman humblebragging that he's read Steinbeck novels

My 13 year old kid has read Steinbeck. Maybe he should coach the Horns. POS Herman. He never elevates his players only himself.

[David Dennison 18,851]

2 minutes ago, Tracer Bullet said:

It was Herman humblebragging that he's read Steinbeck novels

Is it really humblebragging when you reference a book from high school English?

I'd be more impressed with a difficult Faulkner novel. (Sam as Benjy?) Or hell, if he really wants to be a smarty pants, toss out an Absalom, Absalom! reference.

[pacman 7,355]

26 minutes ago, David Dennison said:

Yeah, that was bad. Throwing your team under the bus when it's clearly coaching decisions that are deficient is a terrible look.

But it is exactly his MO. Beck, herman have no coaching failures, only failures are the players.

[Surly Bevo 24,908]

8 minutes ago, David Dennison said:

Is it really humblebragging when you reference a book from high school English?

I'd be more impressed with a difficult Faulkner novel. (Sam as Benjy?) Or hell, if he really wants to be a smarty pants, toss out an Absalom, Absalom! reference.

Actually it was perfect.  OMAM is a novella, so a little longer than a short story but not a full blown novel in length and it ultimately ends in dreams being crushed and a bullet to the dome.  Seems appropriate. 

Edited September 3, 2018 by Surly Bevo

[Skipper 6,128]

My favorite Shaggy.....err...Surly tradition is the press conference thread after a loss, LOL.  I'm as pissed as anyone but there is literally nothing any coach can say in a press conference that's going to satisfy anyone after a shitty loss.  It was the same with Mack, same with Strong, same with Herman and will be the same with the next guy.  

[PilotsError 2,286]

1 minute ago, Skipper said:

My favorite Shaggy.....err...Surly tradition is the press conference thread after a loss, LOL.  I'm as pissed as anyone but there is literally nothing any coach can say in a press conference that's going to satisfy anyone after a shitty loss.  It was the same with Mack, same with Strong, same with Herman and will be the same with the next guy.  

Disagree.  Coaches can state they see the same thing the fans do, which is obvious to most fan bases.  Let us know you see the problems and will address them.  That's it.  But refusing to acknowledge them just shows us how clueless a coach is.

[clapclapclap 9,000]

I'm already tired reading Of Mickey Mouse Mensa.

[NBMisha 224]

Living off da fat of da land used to be a good gig for UT.  Now its just a dream.

 

I'm done with TH.

[Lucid 3]

You guys need to cool it with all the analysis, or else youre gonna get paralysis

[LonghornGoodfella 114]

Just now, Lucid said:

You guys need to cool it with all the analysis, or else youre gonna get paralysis

Sorry but this is what 10 years of absolute suckage and false belief in the kool-aid does to a fan base. Let us have something god damn it. 🙂

[Born Burnt 6,177]

Anyone else notice that the graphic showing our schedule during the press conference said we are playing OU at the "Cottone Bowl" So they moved the game to Sicily?

[ImissWallyPryor 9,046]

2 hours ago, Hooky Hornstein said:

PS - not to objectify folks of the female variety but I’m an old man, I ain’t picky and I’m constantly aroused but I wouldn’t take a BJ from any of those Tulsa girls.

well just a BJ.  

Maybe some anal.  Nothing face to face.

Hooky:

[tantric superman 4,667]

So you guys are saying Faulkner's As I Lay Dying might've been a better reference?

We will beat Tulsa, and Stanford will bitchslap USC, who will still be reeling when we beat them.

You boys will feel a bit better in two weeks.

[campcrunk 2,438]

Sigh.... I had such high hopes for this hire. Those hopes were blunted by the whole Casey Horny thing (for which I wanted Herman disciplined in some way even after Fenves made him can CH). But it's becoming more and more apparent to me that UT hired a made-in-Taiwan John Mackovic with every bit of the narcissistic arrogance and none of the offensive acumen. At least Mackovic could pull an amazing play call out of his ass every now and then. I've seen nothing to suggest that Herman is capable of doing anything like that at this point...

The fact that Herman has insisted on running this same garbage offensive system no matter what and regardless of whether it fits the roster's talent is is just beyond baffling. Even GDGD, for all of his many, many, many, many, many faults, would usually at least try to tailor the offensive system to the team talent (the ridiculous "OMG GARRETT GILBERT PRO STYLE POWER RUN AMAZING" and "Vince Young: Pocket Passer GREAT SUCCESS" debacles aside).

Let that sink in for a moment: our current offensive genius head coach currently appears less competent than Greg fucking Davis. If that doesn't make you shudder, cringe, and possibly even vomit, all I can think is that the disaster on Saturday has rendered you completely emotionally numb to Texas football - and I don't blame you one bit.

Fun fact about actual intelligent people: they don't need a super special magical membership card to show everyone how smart they are. Everything about Herman screams "insecure fraud" to me and I think he's in WAY over his head.

I would love to be wrong, but...

Edited September 3, 2018 by campcrunk

[Lat22 4,010]

Close? What the hell are we close to? Lot of positives? Jesus H. Christ. 

[GSU&UT 1,798]

42 minutes ago, Skipper said:

My favorite Shaggy.....err...Surly tradition is the press conference thread after a loss, LOL.  I'm as pissed as anyone but there is literally nothing any coach can say in a press conference that's going to satisfy anyone after a shitty loss.  It was the same with Mack, same with Strong, same with Herman and will be the same with the next guy.  

I didn't watch this or any of Strong's PCs but I get the strong sense that at least Charlie took the blame, Herman seems to be desperately deflecting.

[TriStone 1,724]

2 hours ago, bigup2dahorns said:

Herman made the call to go with Porter in the second half. Said we need experience at that point in the game on the road coming off the rain delay

Well, that's just indefensible.

[Wishbone 4,759]

5 hours ago, Rockethorn1978 said:

 Someone needs to ask him

”ed orgeron probably can’t even spell his name but changed OC after having a better season than you, do you feel like the smartest man in the room still?”

Yeah, not only that, but the OC he changed out just kicked your ass as an interim head coach in the first game of the season which you just spent the last year preparing for while he was dealing with a negative spotlight beaming down on their entire program.

[stork642 4,498]

37 minutes ago, tantric superman said:

So you guys are saying Faulkner's As I Lay Dying might've been a better reference?

We will beat Tulsa, and Stanford will bitchslap USC, who will still be reeling when we beat them.

You boys will feel a bit better in two weeks.

You haven't heard?   The rest of the season has been forfeited after the loss to Maryland.  And we're firing a coach after 12 games total.  

Edited September 3, 2018 by stork642