Colonoscopy

[Tex Long 4660]

20 hours ago, Underdog said:

You start with a roux… 

Listen to this man. You ALWAYS start with a roux.

[CoTex 1177]

Ate about 2/3 a tub of bluebell on Tuesday night, with bourbon drizzled over it, because I’m a Texan.

Woke up Wednesday - black coffee and had a nice giant shite mid-morning.  Then, at 5pm, I hammered 1/2 of gavilyte jug and proceeded to unload.  Chased it with an orange Gatorade because I like orange Gatorade.  Turns out that’s a really good indicator of where things are because… 1 hour later everything was orange.

10pm - other half of gavilyte. Then Big bottle of Yellow Gatorade.

Soupass until midnight and then sleep.

 

to be continued.

[CoTex 1177]

Woke up with a little soup in the chute.  Sprayed that out - clearish yellow.  Went to surgery center.

Anesthesia is really cool.  At first everything got weird / muffled.  I said “weird/muffled” and they said “that’s the —-caine.”  The other stuff may burn in your arm a little.  Then I said “I feel it in my arm…”. Then I woke up.

3 polyps.  Biopsies pending.  Glad I did it and as far as the doctor, nurses, everyone that cared for me - they were awesome.

For posterity:

1.  You do/can dream under anesthesia.  I did.

2.  I was afraid I would say something while woozy and my wife would hold that shit against me.  Not an issue - when I woke up I was in control.

3.  Anesthesia hits hard.  It’s not like “had one too many shots and went to sleep.”  More like a deer when the bulllet hits it before it ever hears a sound.  Out.

4.  Be nice to the nurses, etc., and odds are they will give you a smooth ride.  I can’t imagine what that would have been like if they were bitchy.

5.  I’ll go back as often as necessary.  Comparing it to a day in my normal life - not that bad.  Prep tastes like lemon flavored laguna madre water and you’ll squirt every ounce back out, but other than it’s just an inconvenience.

If this buys me 1 more year of life, 5 more years of life, 20?  Worth every bit of hassle.

[Jerry Callo 8958]

3.  Anesthesia hits hard.  It’s not like “had one too many shots and went to sleep.”  More like a deer when the bulllet hits it before it ever hears a sound.  Out.

It's like you're listening to Don't Stop Believing and then everything goes black.

[CoTex 1177]

16 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:

It's like you're listening to Don't Stop Believing and then everything goes black.
 

My experience was sorta like this, except I was consciously trying to record the memory and experience what it felt like when the juice kicked in.  I've never shot junk like the drag rats with their needle habits.  I figured this was as close as I would get.  Wanted to experience it - curiosity and what not.

In my mind it was going to be like when you're really really drunk, and then fade to black.  Multiple steps down the ladder to darkness.  I even told the nurse that and she said "some people say it burns in their arms, some say cold."  I was ready to ride the white horse like Lou Reed and Townes Van Zandt.  This was my moment - I was laser focused.

Then, 

1. My arm feels something - I'm getting the juice.

2. Wake up.

3.  What the f happened?  I missed it.

If they have something stronger on the doctor's drug cart, keep that shit away from me. This stuff was like a light switch.

I can see why Michael Jackson and Prince got hooked on this stuff.  It's a weird control thing.  No lying in bed counting sheep, no "I wonder what I have to do tomorrow?  Did I remember to set an alarm?  What's that noise I heard?"  Just I/O.

[blacklab 12059]

It was really bizarre.

I've never been under before, no surgeries, no broken bones. Even when they put the stent in my heart I was awake and watching them do it.

Watched her put shot in IV, tasted something, woke up in recovery room.

Didn't even have a chance to say, "thanks for the one price on this, usually I have to pay $200 extra for butt stuff"

[AUinHsv 584]

Ditto the comment on dreaming. I told them I had just started a cool dream when they woke me up. Guy laughed and said they shoot for REM stage.

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

6 hours ago, CoTex said:

Just I/O.

Great. Now I’ll worry all night long about getting my boat worked on. 

[HRSchenker 2335]

I had a lithotripsy done last summer and it just seemed like a seamless transition from my doc saying "alright here's the operating room" to "alright let's send you to recovery". I don't remember dreaming or anything going black. Just like an on/off switch

[Bookman 4755]

I have one in a few hours. I've been up since 3:30 a.m. drinking the potion of despair. 

[CoTex 1177]

6 hours ago, Bookman said:

I have one in a few hours. I've been up since 3:30 a.m. drinking the potion of despair. 

It is amazing that someone hasn't come up with a better flavor for that shit.  Lemon laguna madre flavor is what I got.  Why not hide that shit in some french onion soup?  Salty and I can eat the f out of some FOS.  If not that, some miso soup.  A little different, not exactly mom's chicken soup, but way way better than the current option.

I would slurp either one of those down with a smile.

[Bookman 4755]

Well, I'm done. I have no memory of what happened, except someone saying "We're done." They said they weren't going to knock me out 100% but the effect seems the same to me. 

[nnm 37885]

13 hours ago, Bookman said:

Well, I'm done. I have no memory of what happened, except someone saying "We're done." They said they weren't going to knock me out 100% but the effect seems the same to me. 

Was this your doctor?

[dcbc 14644]

Ate a big plate of curry-fried noodles at a noodle bar last night.  Black coffee this morning and a stool softener.  Expelled the noodles around noon.  A couple of cups of chicken broth for lunch and some green Jello for a snack around 3 pm.  Counting down to the prep at 5.  Gatorade at the ready.  Watery a-noose incoming.  New tube of Desitin waiting.  Bidet is about to get a workout.  Procedure is at 8:30 a.m. Friday. 

[CycleTex87 3020]

Good luck, we're all counting on you.

 

[nnm 37885]

1 hour ago, dcbc said:

Ate a big plate of curry-fried noodles at a noodle bar last night.  Black coffee this morning and a stool softener.  Expelled the noodles around noon.  A couple of cups of chicken broth for lunch and some green Jello for a snack around 3 pm.  Counting down to the prep at 5.  Gatorade at the ready.  Watery a-noose incoming.  New tube of Desitin waiting.  Bidet is about to get a workout.  Procedure is at 8:30 a.m. Friday. 

This post went downhill after the promising “curry fried noodles” start. 2/10, would not read again. 

[dcbc 14644]

A packet of Crystal LIght lemonade in the prep is a game changer.  Thank you internet.

[nnm 37885]

Make sure you do the prep on the right day …

 

[dcbc 14644]

All done.  Just made myself an omelette and sending my kid for a cheeseburger later.

1 small polyp.  Not pre-cancerous this time.  New guidelines say come back in 7 years, but my doc said 5 would be fine. 

Propofol is lovely.

 

Not going to trust a fart for the next 24 hours.

[MonkeyDoughnut 10785]

13 hours ago, nnm said:

Make sure you do the prep on the right day …

 

Awesome....

[KaiserSoze 1016]

Props to all who have contributed to this thread. I had my first one yesterday and reading the posts in this thread was super helpful in the week or so leading up to it.

As others have said, the procedure itself is a breeze and Propofol is impressive. After they told me they were about to start the Propofol I recall hearing 5 or so beeps from whichever machine was beeping and then I woke up in the recovery room 20-30 minutes later feeling completely fine.

The prep process wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting- my doc prescribed Suprep and mixing it with almost frozen water the taste was 99% masked. The volume wasn't bad either. If I had to do it again that way I'd be fine with it, but next time I might go for the pills others have mentioned (by the time I saw that was an option I'd already picked up the Suprep kit).

I hit Taco Deli for lunch afterward and then took a long nap at home. The staff where I went were all excellent- very friendly, helpful, easygoing, and professional (Northwest Hills Surgical Hospital). I highly recommend them if they're convenient to you. 

[Steel Shank 9552]

5 hours ago, KaiserSoze said:

Props to all who have contributed to this thread. I had my first one yesterday and reading the posts in this thread was super helpful in the week or so leading up to it.

As others have said, the procedure itself is a breeze and Propofol is impressive. After they told me they were about to start the Propofol I recall hearing 5 or so beeps from whichever machine was beeping and then I woke up in the recovery room 20-30 minutes later feeling completely fine.

The prep process wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting- my doc prescribed Suprep and mixing it with almost frozen water the taste was 99% masked. The volume wasn't bad either. If I had to do it again that way I'd be fine with it, but next time I might go for the pills others have mentioned (by the time I saw that was an option I'd already picked up the Suprep kit).

I hit Taco Deli for lunch afterward and then took a long nap at home. The staff where I went were all excellent- very friendly, helpful, easygoing, and professional (Northwest Hills Surgical Hospital). I highly recommend them if they're convenient to you. 

I think it's nice that you had a pleasant anal intrusion experience. I'm going in next month and hope my experience is as pleasant, no, dare I say, as enjoyable, as yours.

[nnm 37885]

6 hours ago, KaiserSoze said:

Props to all who have contributed to this thread. I had my first one yesterday and reading the posts in this thread was super helpful in the week or so leading up to it.

As others have said, the procedure itself is a breeze and Propofol is impressive. After they told me they were about to start the Propofol I recall hearing 5 or so beeps from whichever machine was beeping and then I woke up in the recovery room 20-30 minutes later feeling completely fine.

The prep process wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting- my doc prescribed Suprep and mixing it with almost frozen water the taste was 99% masked. The volume wasn't bad either. If I had to do it again that way I'd be fine with it, but next time I might go for the pills others have mentioned (by the time I saw that was an option I'd already picked up the Suprep kit).

I hit Taco Deli for lunch afterward and then took a long nap at home. The staff where I went were all excellent- very friendly, helpful, easygoing, and professional (Northwest Hills Surgical Hospital). I highly recommend them if they're convenient to you. 

You could have just had the Taco Deli as the prep. It does a pretty good job cleaning out the colon. 

[BabaYaga 15552]

Had mine this morning.  Baylor Frisco.  Doctor had on Longhorn scrubs.  Prep isn't all that bad.  Found an old lego and a dozen marbles.....is that bad?

*anyone have a hookup for Propanol?  Asking for a friend....

[Mo Horn 8937]

1 minute ago, BabaYaga said:

Had mine this morning.  Baylor Frisco.  Doctor had on Longhorn scrubs.  Prep isn't all that bad.  Found an old lego and a dozen marbles.....is that bad?

*anyone have a hookup for Propanol?  Asking for a friend....

I'm sure Michael Jackson had some left over

[HouTex 1921]

I had my second one last week.  My first was 10 years ago.  Propofol is a great thing.  I was beginning an awesome dream when I woke up.  The prep is way better now than 10 years ago.  What amazes me is how painless it is post procedure—especially compared to a digital prostate exam which is about the most unpleasant thing I ever do and the pain lingers for about two days. There is zero discomfort after a colonoscopy, at least for me: 

[SurlyGator 959]

14 hours ago, HouTex said:

I had my second one last week.  My first was 10 years ago.  Propofol is a great thing.  I was beginning an awesome dream when I woke up.  The prep is way better now than 10 years ago.  What amazes me is how painless it is post procedure—especially compared to a digital prostate exam which is about the most unpleasant thing I ever do and the pain lingers for about two days. There is zero discomfort after a colonoscopy, at least for me: 

Perhaps you got the bonus upgrade over digital at no extra charge...

[HiggyBaby 2617]

This guy is great 

 

[Underdog 29132]

Waiting in the lobby while the wife gets her poop chute checked, place smells like shit. 

[The Royal We 3100]

Welp, it's my time in the barrel tomorrow. Starting my prep around noon today. I've got broth and green jello for sustenance and frost Gatorade to mix the colon blow with.

We had a water line bust under the slab in our bathroom on Sunday and I got the fear thinking about going through the prep without my bidet. Luckily the plumbers were able to locate the leak and fix it on Monday.

[nineliveslost 2989]

My prep starts at 4pm today. Alien probe tomorrow at 545am. A little nervous since screening came back positive and I am a colonoscopy virgin. 

[MissingInAction 25546]

Just had my annual check up and will be scheduled for my first probing in a few months.

Btw they don't finger your prostate anymore. It's all screened through blood work.

Dr said she could if I wanted that. I joked that she's got small hands but that's gonna be a no.

Edited Wednesday at 04:50 PM by MissingInAction

[HouTex 1921]

21 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Just had my annual check up and will be scheduled for my first probing in a few months.

Btw they don't finger your prostate anymore. It's all screened through blood work.

Dr said she could if I wanted that. I joked that she's got small hands but that's gonna be a no.

Of course anticipating the usual and predictable Surly retort, but I asked my doctor two months ago about the recent change to no-digital exams and he said he doesn't buy it--at least in my case.  My father, and his father, beat prostate cancer so he recommends I continue with the digital exam.  So I still endure the horror.

[MissingInAction 25546]

8 minutes ago, HouTex said:

Of course anticipating the usual and predictable Surly retort, but I asked my doctor two months ago about the recent change to no-digital exams and he said he doesn't buy it--at least in my case.  My father, and his father, beat prostate cancer so he recommends I continue with the digital exam.  So I still endure the horror.

I picked my dr specifically for her tiny build anticipating the shame.

[The Royal We 3100]

JFC, stop this train I want to get off.

[nineliveslost 2989]

1 minute ago, The Royal We said:

JFC, stop this train I want to get off.

I'll be experiencing the same in 3.5 hours. Hold my beer 

Last night was taco night 

[nnm 37885]

2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Dr said she could if I wanted that. I joked that she's got small hands but that's gonna be a no.

She did not make that offer in her capacity as your doctor. 

[huge 3831]

4 minutes ago, nnm said:

She did not make that offer in her capacity as your doctor. 

Not even the head nurse?

[MissingInAction 25546]

2 hours ago, nnm said:

She did not make that offer in her capacity as your doctor. 

[nineliveslost 2989]

the prep has started 

[nineliveslost 2989]

First dose of funny lime soda water down.

Now 40 oz of water over the next 4 hours

I feel absolutely nothing except hungry  

[The Royal We 3100]

9 minutes ago, nineliveslost said:

First dose of funny lime soda water down.

Now 40 oz of water over the next 4 hours

I feel absolutely nothing except hungry  

I keep thinking it's over and then 10 minutes later I have to do the truffle shuffle to the toilet. How is there anything left inside me?

And yea, I'm ready to eat. Going to be full-on hangry by 8 am tomorrow morning.

[nineliveslost 2989]

1 minute ago, The Royal We said:

I keep thinking it's over and then 10 minutes later I have to do the truffle shuffle to the toilet. How is there anything left inside me?

And yea, I'm ready to eat. Going to be full-on hangry by 8 am tomorrow morning.

its been 20 minutes and just a small fart. 

[royiv 9749]

51 minutes ago, nineliveslost said:

its been 20 minutes and just a small fart. 

Don’t trust any farts from this point forward.

[The Royal We 3100]

59 minutes ago, nineliveslost said:

its been 20 minutes and just a small fart. 

I think it took about 35-40 minutes for the fun to start for me. 

[nineliveslost 2989]

1 hour ago, The Royal We said:

I think it took about 35-40 minutes for the fun to start for me. 

That.was...interesting. Sort of like food poisoning 

Drinking gatorade and ready for round 2 of the dose at 8pm

[nineliveslost 2989]

Oh wow.  It doesn't stop.  

[The Royal We 3100]

I had some chicken broth for dinner and I should have just poured it into the toilet. 

[nineliveslost 2989]

7 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

I had some chicken broth for dinner and I should have just poured it into the toilet. 

Same dinner. Chicken broth is not good. 

chugging second gatorade. 

I am going to eat so fucking much tomorrow 

[Armybrat 41361]

42 minutes ago, nineliveslost said:

Same dinner. Chicken broth is not good. 

chugging second gatorade. 

I am going to eat so fucking much tomorrow 

We stopped by Whataburger after my last butt scope five years ago. 
Had a sweet & spicy double burger and a large chocolate shake.