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Required Reading for any Longhorn ×

do you ever yearn?

Kel Varnsen

By Kel Varnsen
in Movies and TV

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They really should be using a medical dictionary

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csb/ An old friend of mine used to regularly appear on ABC's show with George Stephanopoulus who is married to Schmoopy/Ali Wentworth in real life.  It was their 10th or 15th or some  anniversary.  And they took some close friends out to dinner, including James Carville and Mary Matalin since they're all in the TV political commentator world.  He said Ali/Schmoopy is incredibly annoying in real life, and George gets super annoying when he's with her too.  His description of her reminded me of another Seinfeld girlfriend-christine taylor (Ben Stiller's wife).  Everybody wondered what George sees in her but pretends to be really happy for them out of loyalty.  FWIW-he said Carville and Matalin are just filthy around each other, foul language and sexual innuendo non-stop.   /csb

Caught a rerun the other night of when Jerry is dating "The Masseuse", played by Jennifer Coolidge.  We had just got done days before watching White Lotus (both seasons), and wife and I were just like, "Holy shit, it's Tanya!"  Freaked me out that Coolidge was just 32 in that episode (she was only 38 in "American Pie").  She was very attractive though and taller than Jerry.  Episode also featured Lisa Edelstein, who I find sexy as hell but doesn't count as a Jerry girlfriend (she dated George, which is another intra-thread topic because he inexplicably pulled some vicariously hot ass for Larry David).  I forgot that the actor who played Joel Rifkin was also Henri on Cheers, one of my favorite characters on that show.  And the tiny role of ticket guy in this episode went on to play Bob Barnes in "Longmire", a pretty meaty multi-season role. 

All that packed into what was actually not that strong of an episode.    

 

Hottest girlfriend/date of George's?  GO! 

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Good call.  That's Rena Sofer who looks a whole helluva lot like Lisa Edelstein in real life and on the show.  For a minute, I actually thought that was one of those instances where the same actress plays two different roles, seasons apart, on the show.  Mind blown.  

I'd say those two and Marcy "yadayada" are the triumverate of ass for George.  Add in Nina, if you want a Mount Rushmore of Mounting.  

Obviously George's least attractive ladyfriend would have been Carrie, the daughter of the lady he needed money from.  Honorable Mention to She-Jerry.  

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Any other show, i'd roll my eyes at the same exact joke situation used thrice for the same laugh.  Kramer has no explanation for what he'd wear after returning his pants, Peterman as a charlatan passing off the perfect irony as his own pants store story.  And then Kramer in the dressing room needing Jerry's help because he sold Bania his suit and has nothing to wear home because he didn't think it through.  A multi-episode arc based on a completely idiotic premise that involves almost no deftness or wit.  And yet, I think about one of those three scenes on a weekly basis for the rest of my life.  

"I line up my cold cuts on the couch next to me  but they slipping into my foot bath!"  

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1 hour ago, 4th&Five said:

She was hosting the baby shower at Jerry’s apartment. 

To be fair, she was the pregnant woman that the baby shower was for. Elaine was hosting it at Jerry’s apartment. 
 

To be more fair, I only point this out because my wife has been tasked with setting up her cousins baby shower for the past two months and I have heard every single detail of that process and I want to stab myself in the eardrum. 

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Yeah, she was on SNL for a full season IIRC.  But wasn't in many sketches.  Was an up-and-comer in the improv world IRL.  I think Seinfeld was her first spot on a sitcom.  I thought she was pretty good in it, not a lot to work with script-wise for her character.  She parlayed that into "Mr. Show" where I thought she was awesome in an ensemble cast.  She's been funny here and there in stuff, and her standup is also up-and-down.  But overall, despite being shitty in real life, she's pretty damn funny and has you have to give kudos to her 30-year run in comedy.  That's not nothing.  

Another intra-thread derail.  Female comics from Seinfeld.  We've gone through the male ones.  But how would you rate the female ones?  Silverman?  Kathy Griffin?  Carol Leifer?  Was Lisa Lampanelli ever in an episode?  I swore that she was.  Not many to choose from versus male counterparts but such was the era.  Certainly helped launch a number of 'comedic actresses' careers along the way though. 

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