do you ever yearn?

[Guest Lobo]

Wait, you were wearing the pants you were planning to return?   What were you gonna wear home?

[Biff Tannen 45494]

Newman you wouldn't eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

12 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Newman you wouldn't eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.

VILE WEED!!!

[4th&Five 41460]

10 hours ago, Lobo said:

Wait, you were wearing the pants you were planning to return?   What were you gonna wear home?

 Elaine, are you listening?! I didn't even get there!

[futureman 22415]

nm

Edited October 30, 2018 by futureman

[Guest Lobo]

1 hour ago, 4th&Five said:

 Elaine, are you listening?! I didn't even get there!

I always thought he said, "Elaine, are you listening?  I didn't even make it to the pants store!"  At least that's what we yell out in my house when my wife and I don't understand one another from across the house.

[Biff Tannen 45494]

1 hour ago, 4th&Five said:

 Elaine, are you listening?! I didn't even get there!

I believe this is correct.

[Guest Lobo]

Well, shit.  Don't know where we got that line from.  Anyway...

"That's perfect irony, Elaine!"  

[futureman 22415]

22 hours ago, Lobo said:

Well, shit.  Don't know where we got that line from.  Anyway...

"That's perfect irony, Elaine!"  

it really is.  as you described it I wondered if it wasn’t an intentional bit between you and your wife. 

[Guest Lobo]

Unintentional irony then.  She gives me shit to this day about throwing out lines to movies, but dammed if she doesn't know 5,000 Seinfeld lines verbatim.  the trick though, of course as this thread proves, is putting them out there at the appropriate time. 

Looking back today, I'm racking my brain for any Halloween related Seinfeld episodes, as every other sitcom does in the modern era.  And I got nothing.  Some holiday related episodes come to mind (T-Day thru Hanukkah/Christmas/New Year), but nothing for Halloween.  Several of Jerry's girlfriends plus Elaine I wouldn't have minded seeing in some slutty costume.  

(munches chips and slams diet cola), "Uh, okay...AND WE'RE BACK!"  

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

12 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Unintentional irony then.  She gives me shit to this day about throwing out lines to movies, but dammed if she doesn't know 5,000 Seinfeld lines verbatim.  the trick though, of course as this thread proves, is putting them out there at the appropriate time. 

Looking back today, I'm racking my brain for any Halloween related Seinfeld episodes, as every other sitcom does in the modern era.  And I got nothing.  Some holiday related episodes come to mind (T-Day thru Hanukkah/Christmas/New Year), but nothing for Halloween.  Several of Jerry's girlfriends plus Elaine I wouldn't have minded seeing in some slutty costume.  

(munches chips and slams diet cola), "Uh, okay...AND WE'RE BACK!"  

But I don't want to be a pirate!

 

[Guest Lobo]

It aired almost six weeks before Halloween, but I'll award you partial credit...

[Biff Tannen 45494]

[futureman 22415]

this obviously wasn’t from the show but it is pertinent.  

 

[Biff Tannen 45494]

This man has candy I'm going with him goodbye.

[futureman 22415]

you wanna move it along with the three musketeers?

[Biff Tannen 45494]

I can't see, I can't breathe, but we gotta get the candy, let's keep going!

[Kel Varnsen 8430]

It’s a Twix! They’re all Twix!

[Guest Lobo]

That’s quite a feedbag you’re working on there...

[pokeNbeans 203]

It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your
knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be
dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

39 minutes ago, pokeNbeans said:

It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your
knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be
dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.

Are you an assassin?

[futureman 22415]

12 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Are you an assassin?

I work for your mail order catalog. 

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

You're an errand girl sent by grocery clerks to collect a bill.

[ohchaucer 1443]

You're not a little anything, Newman.

[Biff Tannen 45494]

I thought you said people dress up when they go to the opera?

People do.  I don't.

[4th&Five 41460]

I never understood why George’s tux was short. Did he grow in his 20’s?

[UTGrad98 2258]

"Because I could get uromysitisis poisoning and die. That's why. "

[Biff Tannen 45494]

Was your father also in a red chinese prison?

[ohchaucer 1443]

I choose not to run!

[PencilPusher 454]

That's totally inappropriate. It's lewd, lascivious, salacious, outrageous!

[Guest Lobo]

The man's a goblin.  By the time this case gets to trail, he'll be nothing more than a shrunken head! 

[Biff Tannen 45494]

Goblin is one of the best words in the English language.

[ohchaucer 1443]

Yo face is my case!

[Biff Tannen 45494]

Who could love me?

[futureman 22415]

I looooove edmund fitzgerald’s voice. 

[SimonBolivar 10925]

Oh, yeah. Ghandi loved Triscuits

[HornOnTheBayou 8881]

He used to dip his bald head in oil and rub it all over my body.

[WhatTheBuck 28711]

The Mahatma?

[SimonBolivar 10925]

Who takes care of your boy during the day?

 

[4th&Five 41460]

It’s not a pet! It’s a wild invalid. 

[SimonBolivar 10925]

You know it happens to everybody. It happened to Houdini. And he could get out of a trunk under water with his hands in chains! But he had a problem with that. The miracle is that it ever happens.

[WhatTheBuck 28711]

Your whole building smells like potatoes.

[oSuJeff97 3435]

We had a funny guy in Korea. Tailgunner. They blew his brains out all over the Pacific. Nothing funny about that.

[Biff Tannen 45494]

Here's your pizza peabrains.

[Guest Lobo]

Man, that's a lot of potatoes  

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

Here's your pizza peabrains.

Now I remember why we stopped coming here.

[Guest Lobo]

And two grape sodas. 

[ohchaucer 1443]

Well, can I at least steal the battery?

[Guest Lobo]

That was my  mail-order bride!  

[Biff Tannen 45494]

You can count on Slippery Pete.