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The GQP: Trumpist Death Cult

Hugo Stiglitz

By Hugo Stiglitz
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aggie08
aggie08

This is such unbridled horseshit. I live in fucking California, and I'm not sure if I've ever seen a Fuck Trump shirt/flag/bumper sticker/whatever in person. I can't go a day without seeing Let's Go B

Jive Turkey
Jive Turkey

Did not have former Skid Row lead singer Sebastian Bach talking shit to MAGA cult members on my bingo card. But here we are.  

Ghost of LL
Ghost of LL

Yep. I was a George Will/Ronald Reagan/Al Laffer conservative.  I genuinely thought that if you cut taxes for the upper classes, then they would spend and invest and the economic result of that w

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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what were the metrics on "education", quality of K-12 or just %with college/post-graduate degrees?  I don't think a college degree is all its cracked up to be anymore, but there is certainly something severely lacking in K-12 education in red, southern/western/great plains states.  I did one year of high school at what was, at the time, considered to be an upper-tier school in San Antonio.  My senior year.  And outside of the AP classes, the shit seniors were taking was stuff I did in grades 7-9.  I can only imagine how horrific it is in places like Mississippi or Arkansas.  But of course, those people are also taught to believe they aren't the problem, it's students of color dragging that rankings down.  

I can't imagine waking up in the morning, looking in the mirror and having the only thing going for me is, "At least I'm white."  I suppose they'd put that atop their resume, if they ever bothered to craft one.  

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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19431

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On 1/11/2023 at 1:47 PM, Nice Guy Eddie said:

When I see 1776 on a shirt, bumper sticker or whatever, I assume its a Trumpiss.   (intentional spelling)

Same with "Patriot". It's become the sure-fire tell on par with "Christian" for companies I'd never want to do business with. Patriot Insurance, Patriot Roofing, Patriot Plumbing, etc, etc. 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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At $275/dipshit, even just getting 25% of that cut at this event and lots more like it in the near future plus all kinds of free media appearances...I think Kyle has realized going to college right now would be a mistake.  The grift has a couple more years left in the cycle.  He's a moron, but he's not that big a moron.  He sees the writing on the wall and knows this is his time to earn and burn.  He can always get some Liberty University online degree down the road.  I'm sure he'd like the typical on-campus college experience, but he knows deep down that's not possible given his profile.  Plus, he's probably 20 minutes away from getting an honorary doctorate from Palm Beach Atlantic University.  

It seems like most hard-core MAGA voters I know have a similarly-feeling spouse.  I can only think of 2 or 3 couples I know where one spouse is a batshit Trumpkin lunatic and the other one is a moderate.  They tend to work in pairs.  Whether one of them convinced the other, I dunno. 

But I picture one of our surly MAGA dipshits near Conroe telling their wife, "Hey honey, I'm off the brewpub!"  

Wife: "Yeah, I noticed a $275 charge to the card for that place.  Is it some kinda charity deal or what?"

Surly MAGA: "Uh, not really.  It's all you can eat or drink.  You'd know some of the other husbands going."


Wife: "Um, okay.  That seems like a steep tasting price though.  At least get a receipt for our taxes."

Surly MAGA: "Well, it's not tax deductible.  But I get to meet Kyle Rittenhouse!" 

Wife: "You're paying $275 to drink beer with an underage minor?"

Surly MAGA: "You don't understand.  If I don't go, the media, big tech, and the libs win!"

Wife: "You realize you sound insane?"

Surly MAGA: "Also, can you drop me off and pick me up and give a ride home to Daryl, Jake, and Doug?  It's surge pricing on Uber."

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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I'm sure one of the owners is a swell guy who is friends with somebody on here, but I can't help myself sometimes:

https://www.southernstarbrewing.com/taproom

or call 936-441-2739

If you're raising money for a scholarship or sick kids and have, as the featured guests of honor, some underage kids as the draw...you're allowed to use an on-premise brewery/winery/distillery and charge accordingly.  If you're just a publishing/media company, you cannot have as the draw, for profit, an underage minor at an on-premise brewery/winery/distillery and charge money.  under-21 Kyle can't launch a political campaign or run for Senior class president or raise money for gun safety awareness as the featured guest at a 51% on-premise brewery/winery/distillery.  Or so I told them TABC said as much.  A few more emails or calls from some of y'all and this thing will be cancelled.  Obviously, they'll move it.  But fuck 'em.  30 seconds of my time will take them 30 hours of legwork.  Never mind how many people will request a refund.  

As Brisket says, the Cruelty is the point.  And I am cruel to the Cruel.  Because Fuck Them.  

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105438

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1 minute ago, StassneyHorn said:

Not gonna lie, I’m anti-museum. Can’t think of a shittier way to waste a day on vacation than going to a museum to pretend to give a shit about something that I’m only gonna leave with a sore back/aching feet from walking and reading all day.

Point Candace

Spoken like someone who's never been to the Iceland Phallological museum......

original-64c02bac1ff34ca6ad571ba9559ea0b

 

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GenXer

GenXer 3032

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I called to praise them on their support to re-introduce  the FCC Fairness Doctrine as that appears to be their motive given the event’s description and point out it’s illegal for their keynote speaker to attend.  But their voicemail is full.

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Posted
Posted (edited)
7 minutes ago, StassneyHorn said:

Not gonna lie, I’m anti-museum. Can’t think of a shittier way to waste a day on vacation than going to a museum to pretend to give a shit about something that I’m only gonna leave with a sore back/aching feet from walking and reading all day.

Point Candace

I like museums with actual artifacts. I want to see George Washington's wooden teeth. I want Lincoln's top hat. A natural history museum with a bunch of taxidermy animals? Boring.

Although Opossum World in New Zealand is pretty legit:

Opossum World teaches visitors about brushtail possums, the scourge of New Zealand

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GenXer

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Posted
Posted
12 minutes ago, StassneyHorn said:

Not gonna lie, I’m anti-museum. Can’t think of a shittier way to waste a day on vacation than going to a museum to pretend to give a shit about something that I’m only gonna leave with a sore back/aching feet from walking and reading all day.

Point Candace

I’m team museum. I’m taking my nephew to tour a few NE law schools in a couple weeks. Looking forward to seeing the Gutenberg Bible at Yale.

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Posted
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3 minutes ago, GenXer said:

I’m team museum. I’m taking my nephew to tour a few NE law schools in a couple weeks. Looking forward to seeing the Gutenberg Bible at Yale.

You don't have to go all the way to New Haven to see that.

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1 minute ago, C-Man said:


And cancelled:

abccd4fb667fc1114ceaab875f60e612.jpg

The only thing worse than putting this on is cancelling it and putting out a statement that "we feel this event doesn't reflect our values."

Then why green light it in the first place?

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SimonBolivar

SimonBolivar 10960

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50 minutes ago, StassneyHorn said:

Not gonna lie, I’m anti-museum. Can’t think of a shittier way to waste a day on vacation than going to a museum to pretend to give a shit about something that I’m only gonna leave with a sore back/aching feet from walking and reading all day.

Point Candace

I'm 100% the opposite. I'd drive 50 miles in the wrong direction to hit up a well curated museum 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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Posted (edited)
55 minutes ago, C-Man said:


And cancelled:

abccd4fb667fc1114ceaab875f60e612.jpg

Gee whiz, I certainly didn't see this coming.  And not after I said that TABC counsel would be in touch shortly and gave them Brisket's bar card#.  As stated above, how did they just find out that Rittenhouse was divisive and underage?  I mean, I've planned events before.  We don't run FBI background checks on speakers and emcees, but we sure as shit do a cursory google search.  

Fuck, I had the assistant manager speaking nervously but obviously in aggregate with others...this thing cratered a lot faster than I thought.  I guess the part where I promised them I'd make sure I photographed Kyle drinking a beer at the event, albeit in the corner, may have been a bit much.

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StassneyHorn

StassneyHorn 6643

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When this blows up and all the people in Conroe who never cared about it find out, what alternative will they flock to that weekend to support?Should we setup some tshirt stands at a breastraunt or other brewery in town? “I stand for the flag and Kyle, and kneel only to God” merch 

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48203

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2 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Hosted by Southern Star

I'm not shocked that a Brewery in Conroe will have right leaning politics. That being said, glad to add them to the list of beers I'll never have again.

The grift is amazing. A kid who murdered someone as a teenager, who has no college education whatsoever, is now a qualified voice to tell us about CENSORSHIP? God, people are stupid and dying to be grifted. What a sad state we are in as a country and species. I mean, if you are a dumb motherfucker and squinted, you can make a case that he would at least be able to speak to the topic of gun control, or self defense. But Censorship? Fuck. 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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I like how they're playing it off like, "We didn't know how polarizing this could be, we're just simple cave men making beer for other simple people."  Bullshit.  You knew this printing company (they're right down the road and have hosted events there before), you know Kyle and his baggage, and you knew who'd be attending.  The fucking guest list had to go through your site affiliate to show proof of age to register.  

I think I'm gonna call them back and say, "Whoops, I was wrong.  I totally made up that TABC bullshit.  You are totally clear to host Kyle and this event after all."

Like the keg delivery guy in "Dazed and Confused"........"Whoops, wrong Southern Star altogether.  Inconvenience for you."

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48203

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1 hour ago, jimmyjazz said:

I'm sure there is some calculation that "justifies" hosting an event featuring that kid on site, but I'd never do anything remotely so political if I were a business owner.

Maybe I'm just not smart enough to be a business owner.

Same. There is a local restaurant near us that we used to frequent, because it had an outdoor playground for our son, which is not all that common in our area of Houston. And this one was a few blocks away. We were regulars for about 2 years...until they started putting up Lets Go Brandon and other political messages on their marquee. We have been back exactly once because someone else planned something and invited our son. I'll never for the life of me understand why a business of any kind would risk offending a percentage of their patrons by making political stands. I wont visit a place on general principle of their stupid fucking business acumen, much less when you throw on that I disagree with their shit politically. 

1 hour ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

The only thing worse than putting this on is cancelling it and putting out a statement that "we feel this event doesn't reflect our values."

Then why green light it in the first place?

Eh. I can make a plausible case that some 20 year old chick who maybe graduated HS but never left Montgomery county probably answered the phone and booked the space without thinking about it because...why think about it. It's a booked space. Of course, on the other hand, it's Montgomery county so I assume she probably squealed when she heart Rittenhouse was a guest speaker, who the fuck knows. Either way, I'm still not drinking their shit beer ever again. Not that I often did before, but sometimes it was the best of a bunch of bad options. 

26 minutes ago, StassneyHorn said:

When this blows up and all the people in Conroe who never cared about it find out, what alternative will they flock to that weekend to support?Should we setup some tshirt stands at a breastraunt or other brewery in town? “I stand for the flag and Kyle, and kneel only to God” merch 

I'm sure they'll have Spindletap booked shortly, since it's owned by Aggies. 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19452

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"Cancel Culture"/"Woke Bullshit" will obviously be thrown around in the days to come.  But two things:

1.  It's not "cancel" to not host an event at a 51% brewery with a 20 year old kid.  

2.  How do you say, "We're apolitical...But we feel this event doesn't reflect our values..."???  If you're apolitical, you wouldn't have hosted it in the first place.  It's not that it's a question of reflecting values, it's that if you're apolitical...it wouldn't have been a consideration with which to begin.  Like a pro-vegan animal rights group doesn't just up and say, "We're vegan, BUT  we can't in good faith host a fundraiser at Franklin BBQ after all."  Your first claim and premise is the guiding principal.  Everything before the "But" is bullshit.  I will say, it was a solid finish though with "We make beer for people who like beer."  That was obviously on a sticky note on the office computer for a moment just like this and it delivered.  I still think I'm gonna call tomorrow and say we fucked up and TABC says it's totally cool that they host the event.  The sticking point wasn't politics, it was paranoia about getting negative press on a brewery making a celebrity out of an underage minor who wasn't showing his tits.  Even though he now has tits.  

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NAVY

NAVY 6747

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Posted
3 hours ago, StassneyHorn said:

Not gonna lie, I’m anti-museum. Can’t think of a shittier way to waste a day on vacation than going to a museum to pretend to give a shit about something that I’m only gonna leave with a sore back/aching feet from walking and reading all day.

Point Candace

Take him to the museum 

07D5E112-CF10-4FA4-B30C-77067CDA7F5A.png

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