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The GQP: Trumpist Death Cult

Hugo Stiglitz

By Hugo Stiglitz
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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19327

Posted
Posted
Just now, WhatTheBuck said:

Huh? They’re the largest Christian denomination in the world. They decided which books go in the Bible. They basically created the religion.

You don't know many strip mall Pentecostal preachers, do you. This dude goes to a church where they speak in tongues.  

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Goredho

Goredho 17302

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

This is hilarious. No one gives a fuck 

 

There's a juxtaposition going on for us Americans right now between both real tyranny in the Ukraine and ridiculously baseless outrage here at home as well as real bravery and leadership in the Ukraine vs selfish opportunism here at home.

 

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Mrs Whiggins

Mrs Whiggins 13049

Posted
Posted (edited)
32 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Huh? They’re the largest Christian denomination in the world. They decided which books go in the Bible. They basically created the religion.

You say this because you are someone who considers world history and events. It isn't a stretch to argue that a number of Americans are not far removed from calling Catholics 'those papist heathens' (yes, I understood what I just wrote) and some who are not removed from that type of thinking at all. American religion is little different than any other place in the world--one schism after another.

Edited by Mrs Whiggins
explanatory addition
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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28700

Posted
Posted
17 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

You don't know many strip mall Pentecostal preachers, do you. This dude goes to a church where they speak in tongues.  

I’ve been around a little bit. I’ve been to tent meetings in cow pastures and county fairgrounds. I’ve heard my mom speak in tongues in a little classroom at IUSB (Indiana University South Bend) where god-only-knows who the preacher was that was speaking. She practices selective amnesia and has excised that little episode from her memory. Doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Funny, you’d think if someone was so filled with the Holy Spirit, they’d remember it and go back for more.

I was raised in the Anabaptist tradition. I endured 18 years of forced indoctrination in the Mennonite church. (My mom even advised me to attend Hesston College in Kansas, and that was AFTER we visited their awful campus on a family vacation). I have/had an uncle and a grandfather who were born to Amish families. The Anabaptist story is filled with tales of cruelty, torture, and death meted out upon early church leaders by the Catholics. I’ve heard some pretty prejudicial things about the Catholics come out of the mouths of my family members. It doesn’t mean the  Catholics aren’t Christians.

That uncle, btw, was the same one who brought the Jerry Falwell-distributed Clinton Chronicles video tape to my mom’s place on Christmas in 1994. If I had my life to live over, I’d eject it from the VCR, smash it, and beat him about the head and neck with the broken shards shouting, “You can’t possibly be this fucking stupid!”

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Kyrie Eleison

Kyrie Eleison 9312

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

I saw a FB post from a HS classmate that said something to the effect of "President of Ukraine is Jewish, Putin is a conservative christian...just saying"

every fucker who harps this needs to be told that abortion is legal and free in Russia, and Russia has the highest abortion rate per capita in the world.  

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Burt

Burt 4062

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Posted
1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

I’ve been around a little bit. I’ve been to tent meetings in cow pastures and county fairgrounds. I’ve heard my mom speak in tongues in a little classroom at IUSB (Indiana University South Bend) where god-only-knows who the preacher was that was speaking. She practices selective amnesia and has excised that little episode from her memory. Doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Funny, you’d think if someone was so filled with the Holy Spirit, they’d remember it and go back for more.

I was raised in the Anabaptist tradition. I endured 18 years of forced indoctrination in the Mennonite church. (My mom even advised me to attend Hesston College in Kansas, and that was AFTER we visited their awful campus on a family vacation). I have/had an uncle and a grandfather who were born to Amish families. The Anabaptist story is filled with tales of cruelty, torture, and death meted out upon early church leaders by the Catholics. I’ve heard some pretty prejudicial things about the Catholics come out of the mouths of my family members. It doesn’t mean the  Catholics aren’t Christians.

That uncle, btw, was the same one who brought the Jerry Falwell-distributed Clinton Chronicles video tape to my mom’s place on Christmas in 1994. If I had my life to live over, I’d eject it from the VCR, smash it, and beat him about the head and neck with the broken shards shouting, “You can’t possibly be this fucking stupid!”

Yeah, but did they handle rattlesnakes???

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NWBuck

NWBuck 8543

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Posted
33 minutes ago, Burt said:

Yeah, but did they handle rattlesnakes???

Lost an uncle that way... up in the hollers of West (By Gawd) Virginia.

When my dad heard about it and said "Well... must not have had enough faith", Uncle Ray's mom replied "Faith? Hell, he didn't have enough common sense"

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28700

Posted
Posted
40 minutes ago, Burt said:

Yeah, but did they handle rattlesnakes???

That I have never witnessed. But we washed each other’s feet. And we drank grape juice at Communion and told ourselves that the wine in Jesus’ day was non-alcoholic.

Q: What happens when you take a Mennonite fishing? 
A: He drinks all your beer.

Q: What happens when you take two Mennonites fishing? 
A: They don’t drink any of your beer.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28700

Posted
Posted
18 minutes ago, NWBuck said:

Lost an uncle that way... up in the hollers of West (By Gawd) Virginia.

When my dad heard about it and said "Well... must not have had enough faith", Uncle Ray's mom replied "Faith? Hell, he didn't have enough common sense"

Consarnit. Can’t resist.

 

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Pato del Muerto

Pato del Muerto 52321

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Posted
11 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

That I have never witnessed. But we washed each other’s feet. And we drank grape juice at Communion and told ourselves that the wine in Jesus’ day was non-alcoholic.

Q: What happens when you take a Mennonite fishing? 
A: He drinks all your beer.

Q: What happens when you take two Mennonites fishing? 
A: They don’t drink any of your beer.

Out west that’s a Mormon joke

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 53964

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Huh? They’re the largest Christian denomination in the world. They decided which books go in the Bible. They basically created the religion.

My dad, who has a PhD in Education, believes Catholics aren't Christians.

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 53964

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38 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

That I have never witnessed. But we washed each other’s feet. And we drank grape juice at Communion and told ourselves that the wine in Jesus’ day was non-alcoholic.

Q: What happens when you take a Mennonite fishing? 
A: He drinks all your beer.

Q: What happens when you take two Mennonites fishing? 
A: They don’t drink any of your beer.

Here's how it goes down here:

Why do you take two Baptists fishing?

Because if you only take one, he'll drink all your beer.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28700

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53 minutes ago, NWBuck said:

I see Jerry, and raise you Wendy

 

Interesting. Never heard of him before.

Speaking of Catholicism, if you’ve got the time, Julia Sweeney was brilliant with this piece. (It’s 2 hours long so you have to set aside a big chunk of time for it. But it’s worth it.)

 

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Burt

Burt 4062

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Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

That I have never witnessed. But we washed each other’s feet. And we drank grape juice at Communion and told ourselves that the wine in Jesus’ day was non-alcoholic.

Q: What happens when you take a Mennonite fishing? 
A: He drinks all your beer.

Q: What happens when you take two Mennonites fishing? 
A: They don’t drink any of your beer.

One of my wife's best friends is a former Mennonite. She still occasionally struggles with looking over her shoulder to make sure no one sees her doing anything "immodest."  And her parents live 4 houses down from us so if she comes over to have a drink we have to have it either indoors or out in my BBQ shack. Too risky to do it in the backyard out in the open because her mom may go walking on the trails out beyond our yard and see her. 

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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18 minutes ago, Burt said:

One of my wife's best friends is a former Mennonite. She still occasionally struggles with looking over her shoulder to make sure no one sees her doing anything "immodest."  And her parents live 4 houses down from us so if she comes over to have a drink we have to have it either indoors or out in my BBQ shack. Too risky to do it in the backyard out in the open because her mom may go walking on the trails out beyond our yard and see her. 

Your wife’s friend renounced her Mennonite faith, is trying to wash herself of her immodesty, likes to hide from her parents, comes down to your house to booze it up with you and your wife, and (your words) “has to have IT out in your BBQ shack (presumably code for ‘BSDM sex shed’)”???

Is that what you’re telling us? 
 

this penthouse letter is off to a strange start…but I’ll allow it. 

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Mrs Whiggins

Mrs Whiggins 13049

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12 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Myself, who has a phd in nothing, believes the vast majority of Christians aren’t Christians. 

When I was a little girl in Sunday school, one of the songs we sang had the line (and title), they will know we are Christians by our love, by our love.  I was raised in the Methodist tradition, but that hymn was penned by a Catholic priest who based the lyrics upon John 13:35 (paraphrased): "By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Your statement is easily on point.

 

 

 

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The Original Greaser Bob

The Original Greaser Bob 2785

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8 hours ago, Burt said:

One of my wife's best friends is a former Mennonite. She still occasionally struggles with looking over her shoulder to make sure no one sees her doing anything "immodest."  And her parents live 4 houses down from us so if she comes over to have a drink we have to have it either indoors or out in my BBQ shack. Too risky to do it in the backyard out in the open because her mom may go walking on the trails out beyond our yard and see her. 

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NameAlreadyInUse

NameAlreadyInUse 5104

Posted
Posted
17 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Out west that’s a Mormon joke

 

16 hours ago, Hugo Stiglitz said:

 

I grew up in the south plains, where the water is more naturally fluoridated than almost any place on earth.  As a result, many people where I grew up had these water stains on their teeth.  Despite this, and despite the fact that it is plainly obvious that the people of the south plains aren't big government sheep, my grandparents, who also lived out their for 40 years, believed this bullshit 100%. About 30 years ago, I asked my grandmother when she became a sheep to big government since she spent 40 years drinking that water, unfiltered, right out of the tap.  Or when her neighbors did. Or her children did.  Or when I did. She admitted maybe she didn't think that one through and neither her or my granddad ever brought that particular bullshit up again.  

I definitely didn't eradicate the John Birch craziness from that household but I did at least make headway on a topic here or there.  

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NameAlreadyInUse

NameAlreadyInUse 5104

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I will say that the 1:33 mark was pretty fucking funny.  You only need to watch it for a couple seconds.  "Scientist" with a snake around his neck while a golden sits in the back of the room smiling for the camera.  No context provided for why those animals showed up or disappeared at all.

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 53964

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1 hour ago, NameAlreadyInUse said:

I will say that the 1:33 mark was pretty fucking funny.  You only need to watch it for a couple seconds.  "Scientist" with a snake around his neck while a golden sits in the back of the room smiling for the camera.  No context provided for why those animals showed up or disappeared at all.

I laughed at the token black guy popping in at 1:55 to just...point?

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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A politician used the words "prophylactic" and "oral" several times in the same sentence.  

I leave American politics for a few hours and y'all turn my country into Bourbon Street?  

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TexEx15

TexEx15 17444

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Posted
7 minutes ago, DDD Dad said:

Party of family values:

 

Not just any affair.

”…Taylor had a monthslong affair with a Plano woman, Tania Joya, who alleged he paid her $5,000 to keep quiet.”

Where have I seen that before.

Also,

“Joya is known as a former jihadist who was once married to a commander for the Islamic State. Tabloids have referred to her as “ISIS bride.””

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