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The GQP: Trumpist Death Cult

Hugo Stiglitz

By Hugo Stiglitz
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aggie08
aggie08

This is such unbridled horseshit. I live in fucking California, and I'm not sure if I've ever seen a Fuck Trump shirt/flag/bumper sticker/whatever in person. I can't go a day without seeing Let's Go B

Jive Turkey
Jive Turkey

Did not have former Skid Row lead singer Sebastian Bach talking shit to MAGA cult members on my bingo card. But here we are.  

Ghost of LL
Ghost of LL

Yep. I was a George Will/Ronald Reagan/Al Laffer conservative.  I genuinely thought that if you cut taxes for the upper classes, then they would spend and invest and the economic result of that w

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BamaATL

BamaATL 16592

Posted
Posted
18 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

These people are as if there was some type of moron called an "anti-seatbelter" (I actually knew a couple of such morons back in the day, when seatbelt laws were being passed).  "Seatbelts actually kill people!  My uncle's best friend died when his car went off a bridge and fell into the Dingleberry River, and he drowned because he was trapped inside!  Everyone knows that you're actually safer if you're thrown clear of a wreck anyway.  I read a story about a gal who burned to death because she was belted in and her car caught on fire!  No way you'll find me putting on one of those Death Cinches!"

The problem being that YES, you can find a negative outcome anecdote for, well, pretty much EVERYTHING.  So, YES....someone has surely died BECAUSE they had a belt on.  And YES, someone has surely died from pretty much EVERY medical treatment (you can die from a damned aspirin).  But they refuse to accept the other side of the ledger: for every one person harmed by a seatbelt, 100 are saved from death or serious injury.  Mathematically, you are much better off wearing a seatbelt than not.

Same with the COVID vaccine.  A novel virus is now killing at a much lower rate because the entire population is now positive for antibodies (through either vaccination or infection).  The vaccine unquestionably saved lives in the near term.  And I'm positive that many people have had a negative reaction to it, some serious.  But...MATH.  These positions are for people who are really, really, really bad at math.

Shocks me not that Travis Tritt is one of them.

Drowning in the Dingleberry RIver is paints quite the mental picture.  Sounds horrible.  

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26246

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

There's a local roofing company that has an ad on tv that's just all of their employees in a field saying the pledge of allegiance and then giving a Trump like thumbs-up at the end. Not one word about roofing or anything. Civil religion is fucking weird.

Did they say the Pledge in American, or Messican?

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Fastbreak

Fastbreak 3956

Posted
Posted
So I went and found this tweet in TT's feed. I was expecting to see at least some dissent but I scrolled through about 50 responses and every single one of them was thanking him for his bold stand, etc. Usually, there's a smattering of opposing thought but not a single one in this case. It was bizarre.

Twitter only feeds what you want. There are no opposing views shown to people.
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Macanudo

Macanudo 12925

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I really hope this is a joke, but won't be surprised if you're serious.

It's not.    This person was also all in on the Ivermectin horse paste train too during Covid.   He and is wife were buying it up whenver they found more at a Tractor Supply or local feed store.   They were taking it regularly as a prophelactic because she teaches school so they wanted to boost their immune systems.   I had already cut ties with them by the time Covid rolled around but it was fun hearing about how they both had regular bouts of diarrhe.   They could not be convinced that it was from the Ivermectin.    

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Biff Tannen

Biff Tannen 45491

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, tx ind said:

Imagine how much money you could print with an aggy themed Trump supporting roofing company, it would monopolize the Katy/Cypress market.

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

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Stilicho

Stilicho 1397

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

1. start a church

2. ???

3. profit

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89395

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, Macanudo said:

I used the term "tilting at windmills" with one of them once and they got all bent out of shape about how windmills cause cancer.  It was then that I knew we couldn't be friends anymore.

Next time they tell you that everybody is asleep and only they are awake, tell the they are work.

1 hour ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

Eddie Murphy Agree GIF by Coming to America

Start a social media account spouting MAGA bullshit, and then put out some clever t-shirts and other merch that's print-on-demand so you don't have to maintain an inventory.

Use places like https://depositphotos.com (check the licenses for the images) to put together good slogans/logos/whatever for your merch.

Profit.

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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19330

Posted
Posted
45 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

Next time they tell you that everybody is asleep and only they are awake, tell the they are work.

Eddie Murphy Agree GIF by Coming to America

Start a social media account spouting MAGA bullshit, and then put out some clever t-shirts and other merch that's print-on-demand so you don't have to maintain an inventory.

Use places like https://depositphotos.com (check the licenses for the images) to put together good slogans/logos/whatever for your merch.

Profit.

A "MAGA 10 Commandments" t-shirt would kill.  

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Doc Sam Beckett

Doc Sam Beckett 5782

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

Wanna grab some beers? Day drinking solves all issues 

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89395

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

A "MAGA 10 Commandments" t-shirt would kill.  

Talk to this person

https://www.writersresist.com/2019/07/11/ten-commandments-from-the-book-of-maga/

I.     I alone am your news, you shall not have other news besides me.
II.    Thou shalt not make unto thee global waming or covfefe.
III.   Thou shalt not take the name of thy Lord, your vain president.
IV.   Remember which came first, the wheel and the wall.
V.    Honor thy twitter and fox.
VI.   Thou shalt not kill unless invoking the second amendment.
VII.  Thou shalt not commit adultery above one hundred thirty thousand.
VIII. Thou shalt not be caught stealing.
IX.   Though shalt only bear witness to false and alternate facts.
X.    Thou shalt only covet thy partisan goods.

10-CommandmentsMAGA.jpg?fit=809,1280&ssl

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26246

Posted
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

Or in a way that doesn't involves going up on top of roofs.

Edited by RDCanecutter
hay drogas
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Macanudo

Macanudo 12925

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

I too am unemployed and would gladly join you in fleecing the stupid.  Let's do this.

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Longhorn_Fan68

Longhorn_Fan68 33831

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I am currently unemployed and most likely looking to switch careers.  I'm getting closer and closer to just finding a way to grift these stupid fucks.  I just need to do it in a way that doesn't actually support the Rs or their dotard cult.

 

4 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

I too am unemployed and would gladly join you in fleecing the stupid.  Let's do this.

Do either of you play guitar because boy do i have an idea for you. 

the office television GIF

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19449

Posted
Posted

Some of the dumbest shit we've concocted on here over the last few years would, in my professional finance opinion, actually have legs and make a shit-ton of money.  I come back to not even the Brisket conundrum of "Oh, if only we didn't have morals."  Because we really don't, we just behave slightly more decently than MAGA nation, nothing to pat ourselves on the back for.  I honestly don't engage in it because all it takes is one acolyte with technical prowess to find out who I am in real life and threaten my children.  And then I do something stupid and end up in real life jail over a story they won't believe even later in life.  

So many ways to fleece these fuckers.  You only have to do it for a few days to clear six-figures and then shut it all down.  While most of them won't admit to being made a fool, all it takes is one who knows he was fucked over and can track us down.  

But i still come back to one solid, twisted albeit, idea I posted on here like 3 years ago.  The Trump Presidential Library Advance Committee.  We are raising $750,000 to form a group of architects, advisors, historians, site planners, designers, and political consultants to help us select a site and begin initial design work that would celebrate the achievements of the Trump Administration for generations of Americans to enjoy.  Please help us with a $250 donation to allot for initial meetings, travel, and logistics.  Something, something, something,  yada yada yada.  Get some bullshit rendering, photos of Trump signing hugely significant papers, etc.  List some bullshit names as the exploratory committee with all the proper certifications of their fields of expertise.  Deploy it on the right social media accounts.  We move it through a 50-state federally chartered bank in our portfolio company.  We'd be in the millions of dollars within a week, before anybody had any idea about any of it.  And yes, ACH re-routing in this day and age is comically easy.  Just let it sit in the Caymans for a year and bring it back in bits and pieces via Stripes issuing bank status.  

Every donor is promised an early hard-hat tour of the site which will be some 12-month lease bullshit tract of land we get for a $25,000 legit hold in escrow under some name that doesn't matter because we're gonna let 'em keep the money.  When these thousands of idiots show up, they're given a hard hat and a Flavor-Aid beverage inside their schwag bag.  Admittedly, the mass murder part is probably where my plan goes off the rails.  Speaking of rails.  For another $250, you can get the Key to the Library (one of a limited 500).  Comes with a generous heaping of blow on the end you can do with Don, Jr. in the on-site Port-a-Let.  Who's in?  

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19449

Posted
Posted
Just now, RDCanecutter said:

I think I'm disqualified. I recently talked some elderly Alabama women into admitting a young woman into our art club even though she had done a painting depicting witchcraft. Distinct lack of burnings.

I can't define irony, but I know it when I don't see it in a painting.  

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 47836

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Posted
14 hours ago, Longhorn_Fan68 said:

it is quite remarkable how maga took over Fredericksburg. still, I give it less than a year.

It can't be that remarkable, it is the same way they've taken over Wimberley, Dripping Springs, Kyle, Budha, Boerne, and they seem keen on pretty gobbling up all over the Hill Country or any place that could be conceived us as semi-rural. 

As for Freedom Winery, if their product is decent they'll make it. But Wine drinkers are fickle, if it's a shit product which I assume it will be, actual wine drinkers won't buy it, but the poors will. If it's a good product, for the price, they'll probably get everyone. Trump Burger is still far and away the busiest restuarant in belleville save the belleville meat market, not that this is an apples to apples comparison. 

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The Royal We

The Royal We 3065

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Posted
3 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

Trump Burger is still far and away the busiest restuarant in belleville save the belleville meat market, not that this is an apples to apples comparison. 

It's hard for me to explain the shame I feel that this shit is in my hometown. (it's not really that hard)

It's Bellville, btw. And the Bellville Meat Market is a treasure.

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 53978

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Posted
4 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

It's hard for me to explain the shame I feel that this shit is in my hometown. (it's not really that hard)

It's Bellville, btw. And the Bellville Meat Market is a treasure.

My idiot sister lives in Bellville.  That should bring more shame to the town than Trump Burger.

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 47836

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, The Royal We said:

It's hard for me to explain the shame I feel that this shit is in my hometown. (it's not really that hard)

It's Bellville, btw. And the Bellville Meat Market is a treasure.

I don't really feel obligated to correct the spelling, but fair enough. And the meat market is nice. My father in law owns property in Cat Spring. I do not relish visiting, like ever. 

2 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

My idiot sister lives in Bellville.  That should bring more shame to the town than Trump Burger.

I mean, what exactly is she doing to bring the shame? "Working" at Smokey's Ice House?

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Pancho

Pancho 44434

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You can’t make this shit up. On CNN now, Rep. Gimenez (R) of Florida says the evidence for Menendez is “overwhelming” and he should resign. When Boris asks him “so should Santos resign as well, would you call on him to do that?” And the radical republican says “well…it’s up to him.”

 

Radical republicans - the party of hypocrisy

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C-Man

C-Man 27029

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19 hours ago, Macanudo said:

I too am unemployed and would gladly join you in fleecing the stupid.  Let's do this.

I'm employed but happy to join you two miscreants in any endeavor that separates MAGA dipshits from their money -- and makes a nice little vacation fund for yours truly.

 

18 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Some of the dumbest shit we've concocted on here over the last few years would, in my professional finance opinion, actually have legs and make a shit-ton of money.  I come back to not even the Brisket conundrum of "Oh, if only we didn't have morals."  Because we really don't, we just behave slightly more decently than MAGA nation, nothing to pat ourselves on the back for.  I honestly don't engage in it because all it takes is one acolyte with technical prowess to find out who I am in real life and threaten my children.  And then I do something stupid and end up in real life jail over a story they won't believe even later in life.  

So many ways to fleece these fuckers.  You only have to do it for a few days to clear six-figures and then shut it all down.  While most of them won't admit to being made a fool, all it takes is one who knows he was fucked over and can track us down.  

But i still come back to one solid, twisted albeit, idea I posted on here like 3 years ago.  The Trump Presidential Library Advance Committee.  We are raising $750,000 to form a group of architects, advisors, historians, site planners, designers, and political consultants to help us select a site and begin initial design work that would celebrate the achievements of the Trump Administration for generations of Americans to enjoy.  Please help us with a $250 donation to allot for initial meetings, travel, and logistics.  Something, something, something,  yada yada yada.  Get some bullshit rendering, photos of Trump signing hugely significant papers, etc.  List some bullshit names as the exploratory committee with all the proper certifications of their fields of expertise.  Deploy it on the right social media accounts.  We move it through a 50-state federally chartered bank in our portfolio company.  We'd be in the millions of dollars within a week, before anybody had any idea about any of it.  And yes, ACH re-routing in this day and age is comically easy.  Just let it sit in the Caymans for a year and bring it back in bits and pieces via Stripes issuing bank status.  

Every donor is promised an early hard-hat tour of the site which will be some 12-month lease bullshit tract of land we get for a $25,000 legit hold in escrow under some name that doesn't matter because we're gonna let 'em keep the money.  When these thousands of idiots show up, they're given a hard hat and a Flavor-Aid beverage inside their schwag bag.  Admittedly, the mass murder part is probably where my plan goes off the rails.  Speaking of rails.  For another $250, you can get the Key to the Library (one of a limited 500).  Comes with a generous heaping of blow on the end you can do with Don, Jr. in the on-site Port-a-Let.  Who's in?  

Fuck it -- I'm in! The personal insurance/private client market is fucking brutal right now.

/corbinbernsenletsfuckinggoGIF

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 47836

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13 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Which cult are we talking about? Trumpism or Mormonism? Wasn’t Joseph Smith a con man who bore some similarity to Trump?

I listened to a 6 or so podcast on Mormonism. Joseph Smith’s family worked land, and he fucking haaaaaaaaated it. To avoid that life, he started out as a treasure hunter/grave robber, where he took money from people to lead them to treasure, usually Indian graves. He then tried to be an author, but sucked at it. He then tried to turn that book into a religion. A religion, btw, steeped in the racism of the day,  claimed that Mormons were a lost tribe of white men from Israel that came to America thousands of years ago, and did war with the evil red offshoots of Satan, or some shit. In other words, Indians. 
 

Naturally, plenty of folks gravitated to a new religion, one where conveniently only  Smith could have any access to the sacred texts so they had to listen to what he said. He was a profligate, so when he repeatedly had affairs on his wife and got caught, he changed the sacred texts saying there had been a revelation and now men needed multiple wives. Preferably young. 
 

So yeah, pretty similar to Donald trump. A lazy fuck prone to grift who skated most of his life and left one of the largest religions in the world as his legacy. Just like Trump. 
 

L Ron Hubbard famously said if you want to make real money, you need to start a religion. And I believe he got that from learning about Smith. 

Edited by SydneyCarton
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Js1

Js1 85085

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Posted
1 hour ago, SydneyCarton said:

I listened to a 6 or so podcast on Mormonism. Joseph Smith’s family worked land, and he fucking haaaaaaaaated it. To avoid that life, he started out as a treasure hunter/grave robber, where he took money from people to lead them to treasure, usually Indian graves. He then tried to be an author, but sucked at it. He then tried to turn that book into a religion. A religion, btw, steeped in the racism of the day,  claimed that Mormons were a lost tribe of white men from Israel that came to America thousands of years ago, and did war with the evil red offshoots of Satan, or some shit. In other words, Indians. 
 

Naturally, plenty of folks gravitated to a new religion, one where conveniently only  Smith could have any access to the sacred texts so they had to listen to what he said. He was a profligate, so when he repeatedly had affairs on his wife and got caught, he changed the sacred texts saying there had been a revelation and now men needed multiple wives. Preferably young. 
 

So yeah, pretty similar to Donald trump. A lazy fuck prone to grift who skated most of his life and left one of the largest religions in the world as his legacy. Just like Trump. 
 

L Ron Hubbard famously said if you want to make real money, you need to start a religion. And I believe he got that from learning about Smith. 

I hope Smith and Trump’s similarities continue, if you know what I mean 

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