i recently learned that solicitors have to have a solicitor’s permit from your city in order to solicit at your door, and that 99 times out of 100 they won’t have it on them, which means you can shame them, especially if you have a ‘no soliciting’ sign, which i do. i got my first solicitor since then just now.

Fuck yea! Liked your dog telling them what the deal was.

Should have told him to PM you.

4 minutes ago, HenryJames said:

Should have told him to PM you.

shoulda shoulder checked him.

What if your rich, British cousin dies, leaves you a bunch of money and the estate’s solicitor shows up to give you a check? I guess you’ll be shit out of luck.

Having worked a shitty door to door job in my youth, I can tell you that solicitors love houses with No Solicitors signs, as they often (but not always, so save yourself the diatribe this time around, Slorch!) indicate "a person who knows that they will buy whatever you're selling lives here."

Wouldn't it be easier to set up an elaborate greeting system that uses massive speakers to broadcast a fart noise at 200 db while also releasing copious amounts of fart spray right at anyone on your front porch?

Okay, maybe not "easier," but "cooler?"

Me: did you see the no soliciting sign?

Them: no, where?

Me: right there /points right next to them

Them: oh whoops. Anyway since I have you…

Is how it’s always gone since I put the sign up. I’m sure the training gives them ways to ignore it.

Edited February 19Feb 19 by Pato del Muerto

Open door. See someone I don’t know. Close door. Go on with my day.

Back before moving to the boonies, I'd yell "Just a minute!" Then just ignore them.

40 minutes ago, Your Mom said:

Open door. See someone I don’t know. Close door. Go on with my day.

Doorbell rings. It’s not the mailman or ups. Not a cop and doesn’t look like process server. Completely ignore until they go away

14 minutes ago, Sawbonz said:

Doorbell rings. It’s not the mailman or ups. Not a cop and doesn’t look like process server. Completely ignore until they go away

I’m white, my brother is and dad was a cop, and I’m still not opening that door if it’s a cop.

1 hour ago, Your Mom said:

Open door. See someone I don’t know. Close door. Go on with my day.

the sign is up because i have chronic illness which causes me to sleep during the day and be awake at night. people ringing the doorbell and waking me up is a big deal. sleep deprivation makes everything worse with mental illness. the sign is on the door for a reason.

32 minutes ago, Derka said:

the sign is up because i have chronic illness which causes me to sleep during the day and be awake at night. people ringing the doorbell and waking me up is a big deal. sleep deprivation makes everything worse with mental illness. the sign is on the door for a reason.

This for me today. I almost lost my fucking shit on a salesman. My wife had to calm me down. Son has the flu, I'm not feeling great. Fucker knocks on my door despite the no soliciting sign. Dogs go berserk. I'm only half awake and thing its my wife getting home with the other kid. Then the fuckers knocks again. Wakes me and my son up. Normally, I'm pretty polite to people because I know their job sucks, but this guy was even beyond normal pushing. So I told him to leave.

Couple minutes later my wife gets home from picking up other kid from school. Dogs are barking for longer than normal. I walk outside thinking she might need help with something. That fucking salesman is trying to talk her up while she's trying to get my daughter out of the car.

I walked out with a baseball bat and asked why he was still on my property. "Hey dipshit. You know this is Texas right? And I have a a fucking ring doorbell that's recording this and our previous conversation where I told you to leave. Now I'm going to tell you to get the fuck off my property before I invocate the Castel law with my fucking bat. "

I was fucking pissed. I think the fact that he was close to my wife and daughter and I was fucking tired really fucking made me lose it.

1 hour ago, Derka said:

the sign is up because i have chronic illness which causes me to sleep during the day and be awake at night. people ringing the doorbell and waking me up is a big deal. sleep deprivation makes everything worse with mental illness. the sign is on the door for a reason.

That sucks.

They’re not as easy to find, of course, but they also make signs saying "night shift worker - please don't ring the bell" or something to that effect. Probably won't discourage the most determined, stupid, and/or entitled assholes, but it would probably keep at least some of them from bothering you.

Edited February 20Feb 20 by Prepuce of Doom
Added "That sucks."

I have a different attitude. Other than scouting groups, salespeople get to deliver their greeting, before I send them away from my door. We buy those cookies and popcorn.

Folks seeking work receive my attention, and consideration. Folks who ask for charity receive charity. But, if you knock on my door for political purposes beware. If you serve the party that embraced fascism, I will harangue you until you step off my property.

1 hour ago, Willfully Horn said:

I have a different attitude. Other than scouting groups, salespeople get to deliver their greeting, before I send them away from my door. We buy those cookies and popcorn.

Folks seeking work receive my attention, and consideration. Folks who ask for charity receive charity. But, if you knock on my door for political purposes beware. If you serve the party that embraced fascism, I will harangue you until you step off my property.

The problem is that door-to-door sales is hardly an honest outfit these days. Whether it's sex trafficked magazine salespeople or grifting roofers or dishonest solar panel people, it's just easier and safer to be firm, but polite, in that you are not interested in the least bit.

Plus I built this house like 2 years ago on a fresh lot. I know dang well there is no need for a roof or foundation and I'll never ever pay for the eyesore scam of solar and I have pest control and lawn maintance spoken for and I have good home security already; there is literally nothing that can be brought to my attention via door to door that is of value.

Edited February 20Feb 20 by Vegas64

11 minutes ago, Vegas64 said:

I'll never ever pay for the eyesore scam of solar

The first guy I knew to install solar, way back when, was extolling its virtues, telling me it would pay for itself in a couple of years, and afterwards would be money in the bank.

Claims it paid for itself in fewer moths than those in a year.

I met the woman who spearheaded Austin’s drive for residential solar. Claimed the whole project was close to failure, because she would not budge on payments to those whose property generated energy. She held out, and won. She is one of the good guys, and I continue to raise my glass to her.

But, sure, solar arrays are an eyesore. Nothing is more beautiful than the comfort of conformity.

8 hours ago, Your Mom said:

Open door. See someone I don’t know. Close door. Go on with my day.

I see them ahead of time, especially when we had dogs( RIP.) No chance I'm opening the door.
If I'm piddling in the garage or the yard and they walk up, it's

"I'm not interested."

"But I haven't spoken yet." or "I'm not selling anything."

Get off my property and do not come back.

They don't have the right to interrupt my day. they can rightly fuck off.

If I answer the door, I'm polite. Within 15 seconds, they know that I'm not going to buy anything so they can move on.

11 hours ago, Your Mom said:

Open door. See someone I don’t know. Close door. Go on with my day.

Last week, we had someone ring our bell with a political flyer; they asked for my wife by name. I told them she had died. Radio silence as I shut the door.

8 hours ago, Willfully Horn said:

But, sure, solar arrays are an eyesore. Nothing is more beautiful than the comfort of conformity.

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels, ammirite?

17 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Having worked a shitty door to door job in my youth, I can tell you that solicitors love houses with No Solicitors signs, as they often (but not always, so save yourself the diatribe this time around, Slorch!) indicate "a person who knows that they will buy whatever you're selling lives here."

16 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Me: did you see the no soliciting sign?

Them: no, where?

Me: right there /points right next to them

Them: oh whoops. Anyway since I have you…

Is how it’s always gone since I put the sign up. I’m sure the training gives them ways to ignore it.

No soliciting signs actually attract solicitors, as they believe if they can sell something to you they can sell it to anyone.

9 hours ago, Vegas64 said:

The problem is that door-to-door sales is hardly an honest outfit these days. Whether it's sex trafficked magazine salespeople or grifting r

Shit I wouldn’t mind being sex trafficked. All I gotta do to make that happen is sell magazines??

16 minutes ago, Helobious said:

No soliciting signs actually attract solicitors, as they believe if they can sell something to you they can sell it to anyone.

While they do attract solicitors, your reason is entirely wrong. These people aren't looking for a challenge.

Ours says "No Soliciting: Don't Make It Awkward" - it works.

If I don't know you, I'm not opening the door. If I'm in the office on the 2nd floor and see someone walking around, I'm quick to yell "solicitor!" to the family so stay away from the front windows. Nope. Not buying. Nope. No. Actually, you don't hear me say no because you're never going to talk to me. Last time I bought something from a solicitor it was maybe 10-12 years ago and it was a guy from AT&T who got me off of F'ing Comcast.

9 minutes ago, NorthLoop said:

While they do attract solicitors, your reason is entirely wrong. These people aren't looking for a challenge.

Ours says "No Soliciting: Don't Make It Awkward" - it works.

Right. They love the "no soliciting sign" because to them it's like the fat person who has to write "no ice cream" on the fridge. The implication being their self-control and ability to say no in person is so weak they are trying to not even have to get in any situation with a salesperson.

And honestly? Valid because door to door salespeople are extremely manipulative and pushy and psychologically trained to get to a "yes" and run over the timid, elderly, weak, etc.

When they bang on my door I rack my shotgun right next to it.

Very effective.

This is Texas, Derka. You can just shoot solicitors.

Can't find it, but some comedian did a bit about how when we were growing up, the doorbell ringing was a happy surprise. Hey! I wonder who's at the door?! Kids running to the door and sliding on their socks to see who it is.

Now, the doorbell rings and the adults in the house get wide-eyed and look at each other while hushing their kids. Folks ducking down, peaking through the blinds like a scene from The Quiet Place

My No Soliciting sign is not an invitation.

It is a declaration, and if you ignore it; well fuck you and any respect you thought you deserved.

5 hours ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

Last week, we had someone ring our bell with a political flyer; they asked for my wife by name. I told them she had died. Radio silence as I shut the door.

Lol.

This reminds me when I or my roommates would get collection agencies calling on the landline (remember those?) and asking if so and so were home by name.

I'd ask "who's calling" and they,d say something like "oh, I'm Frank an old friend."

Id say "well we haven't seen him in a couple of weeks, and we,re really worried. We've already filed a missing persons report. If you hear from him please tell him to give us a call."

I won't answer the door for salesmen either, but if they catch me working in the garage, which is often, I will usually interrupt and tell them one of the following:

"I'm a renter. Don't have a say in a god damn thing. Good luck, though."

"We're being foreclosed on. Move out in a few days. Haven't told the wife and kids yet. You want to do it for me?"

"We actually like the poor condition of our windows as our rare and contagious medical condition is a bit less of a struggle when there's a draft."

"Sorry, just got out of prison. Not comfortable with nonviolent interactions just yet." (This one works best if you're holding a tool or something else dangerous-looking.

I also used to try to look nutty and crazy in the eyes, and just as unpleasant as possible in general, and then offer them a beer. No one wants to walk into an enclosed space with a psychopath. The key is to appear genuinely excited that someone showed up at your house unexpectedly, because you have something evil in mind and just need a victim. It's a bit like the old Reverse-Mormon where you invite them in only to try and convert them to a different religion of your choosing. One guy actually took me up on the beer, so it got scratched from the list.

1 hour ago, Foosters said:

Can't find it, but some comedian did a bit about how when we were growing up, the doorbell ringing was a happy surprise. Hey! I wonder who's at the door?! Kids running to the door and sliding on their socks to see who it is.

Now, the doorbell rings and the adults in the house get wide-eyed and look at each other while hushing their kids. Folks ducking down, peaking through the blinds like a scene from The Quiet Place

Sabastian

Invite them in, but with one quid pro quo before you’ll buy anything: they gotta watch the 2nd half of the wolves match and punch themselves in the package at the end.

15 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

They’re not as easy to find, of course, but they also make signs saying "night shift worker - please don't ring the bell" or something to that effect

Were they out of “PLEASE COME ROB MY HOME AT NIGHT. I WON’T BE THERE” signs?

Maybe try a sign that says "NO SOLICITORS - I'M BUSY JERKING OFF, AND IF YOU KNOCK ON MY DOOR, I EXPECT YOU TO HELP ME FINISH?" Either it drives away solicitors, or you get a free handie. Win-win.

“I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO TELL YOU WHY EVERYTHING YOU THINK ABOUT RELIGION IS INCORRECT”

I’ve sold things door-to-door, and I would havevabsolutely run from that front porch sign.

28 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Maybe try a sign that says "NO SOLICITORS - I'M BUSY JERKING OFF, AND IF YOU KNOCK ON MY DOOR, I EXPECT YOU TO HELP ME FINISH?" Either it drives away solicitors, or you get a free handie. Win-win.

On of the typically unspoken benefits to living on acreage: No D2D salesHoles.

& In my roofing work, I rarely knocked D2D unless I had already contracted a project due to an insurance claim & then saw someone within a couple of houses over. If they were in the yard / garage etc. "Fred Smith just signed" & not at all harangue if they decline.

Another is go directly next door on either side & would mention the customer's name then ask if we could (on the day of install) go into their yard to recover shingle wrappers & sweep for misc. nails, etc.

I try to not be the "pushy SalesHole" dude. I guess to the traveling Storm Chaser industry I don't have that "Killer / high volume" instinct.

1,X,?

On 2/20/2026 at 4:38 AM, Iceman said:

I see them ahead of time, especially when we had dogs( RIP.) No chance I'm opening the door.
If I'm piddling in the garage or the yard and they walk up, it's

"I'm not interested."

"But I haven't spoken yet." or "I'm not selling anything."

Get off my property and do not come back.

They don't have the right to interrupt my day. they can rightly fuck off.

I had a guy come down my driveway while I was washing my car. After telling him twice that I was not interested in anything he might be peddling and he still wouldn't leave, I sprayed the shit out of him with the hose.

I'm super polite but have found the best way to get the door to door guys to disqualify me almost immediately is when I tell them "Yep, build the house in 2023, just got the 24 month term alarm/security paid and now month to month, but am happy to compare your pricing and take your product just have 0% interest in signing anything outside of a month to month like I have right now" and they run for the hills. Heck I want to chit chat and have a conversation and I'm halfway following them off the driveway with how eager they are to get away from me when they know I'm never going to sign a long term deal.

Edited May 18May 18 by Vegas64

Literally the greatest thing I've ever seen, but no way the story's gonna do it justice...

When we lived in Wimberley, our house had a glass storm door on the front. The problem with the door is that it wouldn't latch; if you pushed on it, it was going to open out to the porch.

At the time, we also had Zeus, who was 150 pounds of excitement and energy and the doorbell always fired him up:

When he was young and strong, Zeus could literally rise up on his back legs, standing like a bear. He would do this to sniff you right in the face (he was probably over 6 feet tall when standing up like this).

So anyways, one Saturday in the fall, I'm lying on the couch watching football and I can see these two LDS-type women canvassing our street, but it looks like they've passed our house. But all of a sudden the doorbell rings. And I immediately hear both dogs come running from the back of the house. We had a tile runway leading to the front door, so the dogs come tearing down that trying to get to the door; Zeus tries to stop but goes sliding into the door, which he bumps open, and he continues to slide out onto the porch. About this time, I'm just getting up off the couch and I see Zeus out on the porch with this lady who's dressed like she came from church. Zeus hops up, and then rises up on his back legs and sniffs this lady right in the face. This lady had a look of absolute terror on her face; I can still see this scene vividly in my mind. I run outside, grab him and pull him back in and try to apologize while not laughing.

The two women head off without speaking to me, and the next week, when I again see them canvassing my street, I notice that they completely skipped my house.

Good boy, Zeus. If they had heard him yawn they would have shit themselves.

We ignore them but what if?

On 2/20/2026 at 1:13 PM, Samson's Wig said:

No one wants to walk into an enclosed space with a psychopath. The key is to appear genuinely excited that someone showed up at your house unexpectedly, because you have something evil in mind and just need a victim.

I have yet to do it, but have a fantasy of opening the door and pulling them inside and asking if they’ve got the stuff. When they look at me all confused I say “Fat Tony sent you right?” And then when they are even more confused I panic, shove them out, tell them not to tell anyone anything, and slam the door.

13 hours ago, Underdog said:

We ignore them but what if?

Publishers Clearing House started in 1953 as a family business that sold magazine subscriptions by mail. Yet, the sweepstakes company, as it became known as, filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in April 2025, in New York — one of the states with the highest bankruptcy rates in America. The judge approved a bidding plan in May , signed off on the sale in June, and the deal was finalized July 2025 .

During the proceedings, many former sweepstakes winners stopped getting their prize checks. After the sale officially closed, the company's new owners, ARB Interactive, stated it would only continue paying prize money that was awarded on or after July 15, 2025 — the date they took control — with any winnings from before that date having to go through the bankruptcy process. ARB did say it would make a few exceptions, like covering two SuperPrizes that hadn't been awarded yet, and up to $975,000 connected to the May 31, 2025 SuperPrize. However, past winners had to fill out a Proof of Claim form and the deadline to file was July 14, 2025.

Read More: https://www.moneydigest.com/1943090/whatever-happened-publishers-clearing-house/