Official 2018 bitch about family/holiday drama thread

[Johnny Sack 8397]

40 minutes ago, Lobo said:

 Harry Potter theme is really not that bad    

 There’s an outside chance are young family will buy the house in a few years and actually not mind that that is the Decour 

 My 41-year-old sister-in-law has decorated her home in a farm dog theme.   As they have no children and are considering moving back to her hometown, I can only assume the resale market will involve exclusively serial killers And or the president of the James Herriot fan club of eastern Kansas.  Yep, same girl that wants to do a family reunion in Branson.  I offered Austin, Texas but she felt there’s “not that much to do down there.”   

Yes it is. 

And no there isn’t.  

[SHOOTER12 8819]

1 hour ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

I actually felt really guilty about my drunk post from 2 days ago.  I normally don't talk behind the backs of others.  That being said, this thread does serve as a bit of - crap, I'm drawing a blank on the word... 

Did I mention that my 40 year-old SIL is decorating her house in a Harry Potter theme?  No, she doesn't have children.

Also, my MIL spent last weekend at Comicon or some shit.

Don't feel guilty, it's called venting and it's healthy.

[SHOOTER12 8819]

44 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

What is farm dog theme? 

Yes, inquiring minds want to know and all that stuff.

[4th&Five 41586]

2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Sounds exactly like my parents.

They piss and moan about me not coming around. Then act like complete cunts when I do.

Yep. We’ve had it out with them a few times over the years so it’s pretty much all been aired out. After this long you just accept that they’re not going to change.

[luke duke 6413]

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

 Harry Potter theme is really not that bad   

Yes it is. Sorry you're a dork.

[luke duke 6413]

1 hour ago, Johnny Sack said:

Yes it is. 

And no there isn’t.  

lol

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

Yes, there's a tremendous market for Harry Potter themed houses. 

[Guest Lobo]

 I was just trying to look on the bright side for the sake of his sister-in-law’s resale value      

The number of posters on this site that have read those books and seen those movies without children is beyond disturbing

 

[Parliament 14283]

If she feels "unwelcome," let her keep thinking it. Problem will solve itself.

[Chewbacca 7782]

6 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

You don't understand how it works.  She won't do that, because any place is fine with her.

Fuck picky eaters who make everyone else cater to their pickyness.

[Guest Lobo]

34 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

Fuck picky eaters who make everyone else cater to their pickyness.

Don't me started on that one.  My youngest SIL is called a "Vegetarian" by her other siblings and parents.  I think they think means some sort of net positive out in the real world.  But she eats chicken strips, and pepperoni pizzas in real life and somehow they think that qualifies her as a vegetarian.  It was cute when she was 10, idiosyncratic at age 20, now she's closing in on 30 (I think 28 or 29 this autumn) and they think it's charming.  I could give a shit.  15 years ago, I made the mistake of offering her a chicken fajita taco and she broke down crying and fainting in my own home and I was villified by my wife and her family for being so insensitive.  Then she asked me for coaching advice on lunch interviews.  I apparently said something to the effect of, "Be prepared to not ask of chicken tenders since you're 27 and asking for a salary above $35,000."  She also cried then.  She only eats certain pizzas, chicken tenders, and a few other items.  So basically, she's a degree holding 28 year old acting like a  6 year old.  And they bend over backwards for her, but I asked a few questions and I'm the asshole.  Anyway, to the above post...what can you do?  

[usmc0331horn 965]

10 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Don't me started on that one.  My youngest SIL is called a "Vegetarian" by her other siblings and parents.  I think they think means some sort of net positive out in the real world.  But she eats chicken strips, and pepperoni pizzas in real life and somehow they think that qualifies her as a vegetarian.  It was cute when she was 10, idiosyncratic at age 20, now she's closing in on 30 (I think 28 or 29 this autumn) and they think it's charming.  I could give a shit.  15 years ago, I made the mistake of offering her a chicken fajita taco and she broke down crying and fainting in my own home and I was villified by my wife and her family for being so insensitive.  Then she asked me for coaching advice on lunch interviews.  I apparently said something to the effect of, "Be prepared to not ask of chicken tenders since you're 27 and asking for a salary above $35,000."  She also cried then.  She only eats certain pizzas, chicken tenders, and a few other items.  So basically, she's a degree holding 28 year old acting like a  6 year old.  And they bend over backwards for her, but I asked a few questions and I'm the asshole.  Anyway, to the above post...what can you do?  

My SiL mostly also eats chicken fingers and she’s 30. I blame her parents.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

26 minutes ago, usmc0331horn said:

My SiL mostly also eats chicken fingers and she’s 30. I blame her parents.

Saw that whole chicken fingers are all they'll eat with several of the neighborhood families.  Fuck that, our kids ate what we ate. We made them try different food from an early age.  It cost us more at restaurants, But we never had any of that picky eater shit.  

The night our 9 yr old son asked the waiter to bring an order of Calamari for the table, and was their beef Angus we knew we'd created a monster.

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

Need pics of farm dog themed house

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

4 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Need pics of farm dog themed house

Well it's a dog house shaped like a barn of course.... d'uh....

[Nolacycling 893]

Yearly conversation w/mom.

Her: Are you going to come home to Iowa for xmas?

it's her home. Never did any growing up there.

Me: Why would I visit Iowa in the dead of winter, when I live in Corpus Christi? I enjoy summertime there, why don't you visit me?

Well guess I made my point, she will visit this winter. For 3 months. 

[EE2B 1565]

Yearly conversation w/mom.
Her: Are you going to come home to Iowa for xmas?
it's her home. Never did any growing up there.
Me: Why would I visit Iowa in the dead of winter, when I live in Corpus Christi? I enjoy summertime there, why don't you visit me?
Well guess I made my point, she will visit this winter. For 3 months. 

Did you tell her to bring her own chair?

[Al_4_ISU 12477]

When I think "farm dog" theme, I'm imagining our farm dog growing up.

To achieve maximum accuracy this place will need to have various livestock limbs drug into the front yard, and a dog house full of straw with old couch cushions inside the garage

[Chewbacca 7782]

Saw that whole chicken fingers are all they'll eat with several of the neighborhood families.  Fuck that, our kids ate what we ate. We made them try different food from an early age.  It cost us more at restaurants, But we never had any of that picky eater shit.  
The night our 9 yr old son asked the waiter to bring an order of Calamari for the table, and was their beef Angus we knew we'd created a monster.

Yeah, my 2 always want sushi for their birthdays. I have to order some rolls first because they will eat all the nigiri in about 2 minutes.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

28 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

9 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Saw that whole chicken fingers are all they'll eat with several of the neighborhood families.  Fuck that, our kids ate what we ate. We made them try different food from an early age.  It cost us more at restaurants, But we never had any of that picky eater shit.  
The night our 9 yr old son asked the waiter to bring an order of Calamari for the table, and was their beef Angus we knew we'd created a monster.

Yeah, my 2 always want sushi for their birthdays. I have to order some rolls first because they will eat all the nigiri in about 2 minutes.

Greedy little bastards !!!!

[SydneyCarton 48150]

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

On 7/13/2019 at 9:09 AM, slorch said:

First time on a family vacation with multiple families involved, staying at mega house in NM.  This vacation was planned half a year ago, and we followed through on it despite having my MIL's funeral this past Monday. It was supposed to have no children, with an emphasis on the girl cousins on my wife's side of family getting together. One of them started to bring one of their kids, but caught on that this was not what everyone else wanted for the vacation.  They actually did not come at all, which is fine.  We all get here on the following Tuesday.  Everything's cool, but they want to go to bed around 9:30 PM.  Hey, we just had a major emotional event with the funeral and it it has been particularly exhausting for my wife and SIL.  I get it.  We crash and start the real vacation on Wed AM.

I wake up at 6AM Texas time...because that's when I virtually always get up when I'm not working.  I piddle on the computer, sit outside on the deck and watch deer coming in the eat the corn from below the 2nd story deck.  We're in the mountains and it's about 58 degrees.  Perfect.  Absolutely refreshing on vacation. Everyone else starts getting up around 9, we visit, and then everyone gets showered and dressed to go into town at 11:00AM for lunch.  The town has a crapton of shops and places to look, with an emphasis on New Mexico/ SW culture and decor.  I hate shopping, but when I am here with the wife, enjoy meandering through the shops and looking at what they have,  Wife is completely looking forward to shopping all day, or at least from lunch till dinner.  This is her wheelhouse for vacation fun time.

We eat lunch and  go to one furniture store which has some really, really cool stuff that we like. we are there for 45 min or so.  BIL has to go back to house for some meds, which is about 10 miles away up the mountain.  OK, whatever.  I am the DD for the trip, so I take him.  When we get to the house, he says he's going to take a nap and he'll catch us at dinner.  No worries.  I go back down to catch up with the ladies. I get back and the other ladies are ready to go back to house... it is 2:30.  Really?  My wife is disappointed, but whatever.  maybe everyone is still tired from the funeral( and week preceding.)  We go back to house and within 15 min, everyone is asleep except wife and I.  WTF?  I am all about resting up and getting refreshed on vacation, but I didn't come all the way out here to fucking sleep all gotdam day. You motherfuckers didn't even get out of the rack until 9.  So...I start drinking.  LOlz.

It gets up to about 95 that day, which is very warm for the area.  AC is set on 78 and doors are wide open towards the back deck, which is usually awesome when the highs are in the 70's/80's. AC has no chance to keep up. I am sweating my ass off...on vacation.  Wife can see I am starting to get pissed/ increase pace on the beer.  We talk and I tell her I understand all of the tiredness of the others and what not, but I am not doing that all day for the rest of the week  We have 3 vehicles and we are not locked in to doing everything together, especially if that is limited to 3 hours of fun shit per day.  Nobody is more than 6 years older than I am.  I am 48.  This fucking place is starting to feel like an old folks home.

Thursday- cold front blows in and it is freaking awesome in the low 70's all day.  Doors are shut because it is too cold.  Are you fucking kidding me?  It is spectacular weather versus a Texas summer and NOW you want to close the doors out to the deck? I open every window in our bedroom and turn the fan on...LOlz  Same morning schedule and we drop the ladies off after lunch while my BIL and I go to GoCart/ arcade place.  I play pinball for about 3 games and offer to pay for his games, but he cannot see the game in what was admittedly terribad lighting.  We go ride the go-carts which is pretty fun.  We do 2 races.  "We better go check on the girls..."  Waaat?  It's been like an hour.  We show up and the ladies are in a small winery.  they had only gone to 2 shops.  "welp.  Let's go back up to the house..."

OMFG!!!  Even my wife is wondering WTF.   We get up to the house and I tell everyone I am leaving and going to casino.  i leave for about 3-4 hours, get back at 7 pm.  Dinner is half over and they are getting ready to call it a night. Unbelievable.

Yesterday...virtually the same routine, only when we get back to the house, BIL turns on Foxnews and insists that we should catch up on current events.  At this point, I feel like I am in a very, very bad movie spoofing how rotten vacations can be. I tell wife I 'm not sitting there watching the agitation channel all afternoon.  We (thankfully) decide to all go out to casino and try their very nice taproom and eat dinner.

Dinner was nice and the drinks were excellent.  When we got there though, we went in the casino and it was already, "Isn't it time to go eat?"  "There is nothing to do here."

I'm sorry we left your fucking nap mat at the house you motherfuckers.

We had debated going home today after lunch or tomorrow.  Yeah, we gone today.  I cannot handle this any more.  All that's missing is Nurse Ratchet.  I guess the scary part is wondering if I am that close to being "old."  I swear it was 3-4 hours of activity per day and then it was nap time.  Fuck that.  Never again. I hung out with my grandparents a lot of my life and they were way the fuck more active than that at a much older age.  We like doing shit on vacation... not sitting at the house all fucking day. WE COULD DO THAT AT FUCKING HOME!!!! We went on vacation to do things we don't get to see and do all of the time.

Any of you assholes go on vacation to sleep?  I mean 4-5 days in a row?  grown ass adults with no kids...

If you ARE limited in your desire for activities, DO NOT insist that we all do everything together.  This is what we're doing... you can come and go as you please.

It's a long ass rant, and I apologize; but Christ almighty, I do not understand people sometimes.

 

Virtually nothing you and your clan did would be on my family’s list of mountain vacation activities. The problems start there. 

[Beau Vine 54379]

3 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Yearly conversation w/mom.

Her: Are you going to come home to Iowa for xmas?

it's her home. Never did any growing up there.

Me: Why would I visit Iowa in the dead of winter, when I live in Corpus Christi? I enjoy summertime there, why don't you visit me?

Well guess I made my point, she will visit this winter. For 3 months. 

Thoughts and prayers.

[Guest Lobo]

1 hour ago, ImissWallyPryor said:

Virtually nothing you and your clan did would be on my family’s list of mountain vacation activities. The problems start there. 

Sounds like the exact same vacation could have been had near an Oklahoma gaming town.  

[Chewbacca 7782]

1 hour ago, ImissWallyPryor said:

Virtually nothing you and your clan did would be on my family’s list of mountain vacation activities. The problems start there. 

Yeah, I must have missed the hiking, fishing, mountain biking and four wheeling parts of his story.

[Armybrat 40873]

3 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

Brat gets Vegas.

Having spent a fuck ton of time there both business (actual job and semi-pro poker) and for fun only it amazes me how many people are clueless on how to get it done.

His timing is fucking perfect and missed the bulk of waiting, idiots and nonsense.

Boss as hell indeed.

Brat is also annoyed at other parents bringing kids to Vegas. He has had enough of the stroller toe to last a lifetime.

[Beau Vine 54379]

13 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Saw that whole chicken fingers are all they'll eat with several of the neighborhood families.  Fuck that, our kids ate what we ate. We made them try different food from an early age.  It cost us more at restaurants, But we never had any of that picky eater shit.  

The night our 9 yr old son asked the waiter to bring an order of Calamari for the table, and was their beef Angus we knew we'd created a monster.

I've said this on other threads, but I'm blown away by how few of our daughter's friends' parents actually ever cook.  She said that of all the times she has eaten dinner at her best friend's house, the only things her mother has ever "cooked" for dinner were frozen pizza or frozen chicken strips. 

[gernblansten 3197]

1 minute ago, Beau Vine said:

I've said this on other threads, but I'm blown away by how few of our daughter's friends' parents actually ever cook.  She said that of all the times she has eaten dinner at her best friend's house, the only things her mother has ever "cooked" for dinner were frozen pizza or frozen chicken strips. 

It's way to cheap and easy for people to eat crap food.

[T’Boo Ted Marshall 2739]

Dogs playing poker theme>Farm dog theme.

[Al_4_ISU 12477]

35 minutes ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

Dogs playing poker theme>Farm dog theme.

You're telling me you don't want a gnawed off cow leg in your front yard?

[workswithseed 2110]

1 hour ago, gernblansten said:

It's way to cheap and easy for people to eat crap food.

Yeah, and you have less to clean up afterwards, I don't know seems like a win win to me. 

[ABSR 5321]

7 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Yearly conversation w/mom.

Her: Are you going to come home to Iowa for xmas?

it's her home. Never did any growing up there.

Me: Why would I visit Iowa in the dead of winter, when I live in Corpus Christi? I enjoy summertime there, why don't you visit me?

Well guess I made my point, she will visit this winter. For 3 months. 

Did you spell days wrong? 

 

Holy shit!  How can someone thinks visiting for anywhere near this long is appropriate.

[Sam Lin 3560]

On 7/18/2019 at 12:51 AM, Armybrat said:

He has had enough of the stroller toe to last a lifetime.

Is that like camel toe?

[Armybrat 40873]

50 minutes ago, Sam Lin said:

Is that like camel toe?

Only if the mom pushing her kid’s stroller over your toe is wearing yoga pants.

[Guest Lobo]

ArmyBrat is old enough to remember when two talking camels would come upon one another in the old testament, look at each other's hooves and shout, "Outer Labia!"  

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

9 minutes ago, Lobo said:

ArmyBrat is old enough to remember when two talking camels would come upon one another in the old testament, look at each other's hooves and shout, "Outer Labia!"  

It's always a good time to drop this:

 

[KaiserSoze 998]

 

 

[Guest Lobo]

I'd like my MIL and/or FIL to come visit to watch the little one while we take the older one on a trip.  they can't make it because they have to hang back and make pies for a family reunion.  When I offered to buy flights for them so they could skip the 26 hours of round-trip driving, they said they didn't want to fly because they'd only done it twice and felt the third time would mean certain death.  I reminded them we lose 40 Americans each year to flying (usually very small planes) and we lose 40,000 Americans to vehicular deaths.  They were not phased and are apparently not coming.  

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

10 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I'd like my MIL and/or FIL to come visit to watch the little one while we take the older one on a trip.  they can't make it because they have to hang back and make pies for a family reunion.  When I offered to buy flights for them so they could skip the 26 hours of round-trip driving, they said they didn't want to fly because they'd only done it twice and felt the third time would mean certain death.  I reminded them we lose 40 Americans each year to flying (usually very small planes) and we lose 40,000 Americans to vehicular deaths.  They were not phased and are apparently not coming.  

Holy shit 3x ?!!  I'm on seriously borrowed time !!

[TrashMaster G 17588]

On 7/17/2019 at 8:22 AM, Nolacycling said:

Yearly conversation w/mom.

Her: Are you going to come home to Iowa for xmas?

it's her home. Never did any growing up there.

Me: Why would I visit Iowa in the dead of winter, when I live in Corpus Christi? I enjoy summertime there, why don't you visit me?

Well guess I made my point, she will visit this winter. For 3 months. 

You done fucked up.

[Nolacycling 893]

2 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Holy shit 3x ?!!  I'm on seriously borrowed time !!

 

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

I'd like my MIL and/or FIL to come visit to watch the little one while we take the older one on a trip.  they can't make it because they have to hang back and make pies for a family reunion.  When I offered to buy flights for them so they could skip the 26 hours of round-trip driving, they said they didn't want to fly because they'd only done it twice and felt the third time would mean certain death.  I reminded them we lose 40 Americans each year to flying (usually very small planes) and we lose 40,000 Americans to vehicular deaths.  They were not phased and are apparently not coming.  

Uh, I'm  confused on what tix you offered, so...

If they don't want tix to visit you and help you out, then they don't like you.

If they turned down tix to go to a remote family reunion in return for helping you out, then they don't like you.

They don't like you.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21920]

Maybe they just don’t like your kids

[Guest Lobo]

Reason I offered to buy their tickets is because they’ve flown twice in 70 years.  When I say “offer”, they’ll pay me back.  They just don’t know how to buy airline tickets.  They could make their reunion with  pies and still make it down here if they took the four total days of driving out of the equation.  But as usual, they won’t because air travel remains a dangerous mystery to them.  Just a rant; thanks for listening.  

[Nolacycling 893]

45 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Reason I offered to buy their tickets is because they’ve flown twice in 70 years.  When I say “offer”, they’ll pay me back.  They just don’t know how to buy airline tickets.  They could make their reunion with  pies and still make it down here if they took the four total days of driving out of the equation.  But as usual, they won’t because air travel remains a dangerous mystery to them.  Just a rant; thanks for listening.  

They don't like you.

[mulletpelini 5215]

and your kids

[Nolacycling 893]

8 hours ago, Lobo said:

Reason I offered to buy their tickets is because they’ve flown twice in 70 years.  When I say “offer”, they’ll pay me back.  They just don’t know how to buy airline tickets.  They could make their reunion with  pies and still make it down here if they took the four total days of driving out of the equation.  But as usual, they won’t because air travel remains a dangerous mystery to them.  Just a rant; thanks for listening.  

I totally get you. Mom wouldn't fly for extended visit because of dog. Just couldn't solve the problem of travelling w/dog in her own mind. I've never done it either, but I know it happens! Dog passed and problem solved. 

[ABSR 5321]

54 minutes ago, Nolacycling said:

I totally get you. Mom wouldn't fly for extended visit because of dog. Just couldn't solve the problem of travelling w/dog in her own mind. I've never done it either, but I know it happens! Dog passed and problem solved. 

So you are telling Lobo to kill their dog?