Official 2018 bitch about family/holiday drama thread

[BearSchlong 8134]

2 hours ago, Flg8rfan said:

Recovering addict as in recently trashed his parents house while they were on vacation and sold stuff for drug $, multiple rehab stints (typically leaving mid program), and other psychological issues that we’ve heard exist, just not a lot of detail type of recovering addict. I’m not even sure if we’re going to be putting knives at the place settings, lol.

I’m sure I’ll have stories for here on Friday.

Ah I see.  That little fucker would have been banned from my house, he needs consequences, but that's another thread. 

[MissingInAction 25246]

59 minutes ago, Pokoloco said:

Wife asked her mom to bring rolls. My MIL said she can't because she doesn't get paid until the 26th. She can't fucking afford rolls.

Buy a can of frozen biscuits, stick the receipt on them, then put them on the counter when she shows up. 

 

$2.09

[GhostOfTomJoad 9381]

Can't afford rolls? Shit, how much money do you think your wife's gonna slip her during dinner after the sob stories of "I don't know if I've got enough gas in my tank to get home" and "I hope it doesn't get too cold tonight since my electricity is turned off?"

 

Not family related, but definite fucking drama hit our house yesterday. Brined my turkey & was doing general feast prep when I reached under the kitchen sink & found 1/4" of water on the bottom of the cabinet. Fuck. Leak in the faucet head was dripping down into the cabinet. Picked up a new, better one at Home Depot & spent the afternoon replacing the old one which wouldn't budge. Two of my buddies came over to help & we eventually ended up taking out the whole sink & moving it to the backyard where we were finally able to bust out the old faucet. What should've taken 90 minutes tops ended up being a 4 hour pain in the ass. But I'm thanking my lucky stars this happened on Tuesday & not Thursday morning during feast prep with everything closed down.

[wd40 1976]

this thread is like crack on so many levels

[Pokoloco 1282]

3 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Can't afford rolls? Shit, how much money do you think your wife's gonna slip her during dinner after the sob stories of "I don't know if I've got enough gas in my tank to get home" and "I hope it doesn't get too cold tonight since my electricity is turned off?"

The good news is Trix won't do shit for her, she has no sympathy.  

The reason she's always broke?  when she's not losing at the slots, she spends the rest of it on buying stupid shit off of QVC and HSN.

[noharleyyet 2853]

Attempting to mitigate the ratio of holiday fun to dysfun, bride and I are escaping to Santa Fe Turkey Day morning for a weekend of adult beverage hazed consumerism. The reality of full bore Christmas gifting and hosting drama a full month away. The concept of well behaved small grandchildren only admittance sounding entirely rational.

 

[Okie State 3848]

The good news is Trix won't do shit for her, she has no sympathy.  
The reason she's always broke?  when she's not losing at the slots, she spends the rest of it on buying stupid shit off of QVC and HSN.

QVC and HSN are like drugs for poor people.

[Al_4_ISU 12516]

53 minutes ago, noharleyyet said:

Attempting to mitigate the ratio of holiday fun to dysfun, bride and I are escaping to Santa Fe Turkey Day morning for a weekend of adult beverage hazed consumerism. The reality of full bore Christmas gifting and hosting drama a full month away. The concept of well behaved small grandchildren only admittance sounding entirely rational.

 

Can we talk about Christmas gifting?

I hate giving other adults gifts, and I don't want them in return.  Leave gifts for the kids, and just enjoy each other's company.  Use the money you would have spent on said gifts on buying the things you actually need for yourself and give others the same consideration.

God, I hate that part of Christmas.

[Pokoloco 1282]

Also, in lieu of rolls, the MIL is bringing my wife's heroin addict nephew with her.  He and my alcoholic son could have a "fuck up off".

[ztejas 43608]

10 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Can we talk about Christmas gifting?

I hate giving other adults gifts, and I don't want them in return.  Leave gifts for the kids, and just enjoy each other's company.  Use the money you would have spent on said gifts on buying the things you actually need for yourself and give others the same consideration.

God, I hate that part of Christmas.

Last Christmas I just took a couple books off the shelf at work and gave them to my parents.

Merry Christmas. 

[ztejas 43608]

4 minutes ago, Pokoloco said:

He and my alcoholic son could have a "fuck up off".

Dad - is that you?

[ztejas 43608]

23 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Or, if her only extended family (aunt/uncle and 2 cousins from Chicago) are home, there will be an inevitable political conversation in which her cousins (who are intolerantly left wing - and I say this as a left winger) tell my father in law (who is basically just uniformed and sorta populist, but likes Trump) that he's a racist

Hang on a sec - the cousins - from Chicago - are the one's labeling racists?

[Al_4_ISU 12516]

21 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Hang on a sec - the cousins - from Chicago - are the one's labeling racists?

Yes.  Both of the cousins live in Seattle now, but are from Chicago originally, where the aunt & uncle (their parents) still live.  One lived in NYC for a bit, and they're both extremely judgmental and intensely left wing (no CR - like I said earlier, I'm left of center myself - I'm just not into attacking people for their politics).  Basically, my MIL's tendency to judge the shit out of everyone is well preserved in that blood line (MIL's sister's kids).

At least their husbands are good dudes that like to drink beer.

Edited November 21, 2018 by Al_4_ISU

[BigDHornfan 6564]

My wife and my 20 year old niece aren't speaking and the wife has put her foot down that she's not allowed in our house.  That means that my mother and her husband aren't coming so half the family isn't alienated.  So now nobody is coming.  I take that as a fucking win!  And we were already planning on having a 2nd thanksgiving at the MIL's house on Saturday so I am off the hook on cooking tomorrow.  I plan on drinking bourbon all day and watching football.   Should be a great day. 

[Guest]

Pics of niece?

[Telegraph_it 3360]

Thanksgiving dinner #1 of 4 starts tonight at the inlaws. The meal sounds legit with the main course being fried shrimp. Problem is the inlaws are renovating their house and adding an addition.  Place reeks of fumes. Probably going to get diabeetus. 

Also my wife cannot stand her SIL. I always like to push buttons to get the fireworks going. 

[GhostOfTomJoad 9381]

Survived the run to Total Wine for beer. Got enough to get me through the Texas game Friday if I pace myself. Passed HEB on the way. Parking lot looked like they were filming a new Road Warrior movie.

[BigDHornfan 6564]

2 hours ago, slorch said:

Pics of niece?

🖕

[Archer 474]

11 minutes ago, BigDHornfan said:

🖕

[Guest]

34 minutes ago, BigDHornfan said:

🖕

Could you at least share the 'beef' between your wife and the niece?

#phrasing

[BigDHornfan 6564]

Could you at least share the 'beef' between your wife and the niece?
#phrasing

My niece is a moody cunty bitch and my wife called her on her shit.
All that needs to be said.

[Moby Ric 2058]

So met the BIL's GF.  She is in her 20's, not hot. He is in his 40's.  Covered in tat's and a lip ring (nttawwt) Has no job and no prospects.  I had to buy some Clamato Budweiser by request for them.  FIL is a a real old school asshole.  This is going to go over well.

[BradInATX 9208]

My mother is an extreme narcissist/manipulator, to the point where up until recently, I was the only of her children that hadn't cut her off. Every holiday is a complete stress bomb where she demands that we spend both holidays (Thanksgiving/Christmas) with her. Completely unreasonable given that both my parents and my wife's are divorced, so we've got four families to cater to every holiday, scattered from Waco to New Braunfels. Every god damn year we swear we aren't caving, and every year we end up driving from Austin to Waco to New Braunfels to Wimberley in 24-48 hours on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Mostly to appease her, and because all of our parents, save my dad, host their own holiday and refuse to drive to anyone.
Anyway, she was an absolute terror during my wife's recent pregnancy (baby born in September). Threw a legitimate fit like you'd see a child throw because I pushed back on her inviting 10+ people to my baby shower, that my wife either don't know, or barely know. Decided to stop participating, and didn't show up to the baby shower of her first and only grandchild. Threw another shit fit when I told her that we didn't want family in the room for the baby's delivery (they could come after we moved into recovery). Then, the final meltdown came because of social media. I texted her saying we were on our way to the hospital, and she immediately posted on Facebook that she was going to be a grandma tonight - before we had a chance to tell even the rest of our immediately family. My wife's dad found out we were having a baby via that post. We managed to calm it down, but that's the type of stress you don't need the day and day after you deliver a kid. When I told her that was inconsiderate, she had a complete meltdown, and told me that she was done with me. On the day my son was born.
So anyway, that's not really related to the holidays, but that's my vent.
On the bright side, now that we have the baby, we're drawing a line in the sand on the holidays. All of the family has been notified that for Thanksgiving, we pre-ordered a brisket and some other stuff from Franklin's and will load up on wine and booze. We aren't leaving the house. If anyone wants to come by, that's great, come on by. But don't ask me about side dishes or timing or plans, because there are none, except to drink, eat, and watch football at some point. We're doing the same for Christmas. Frankly, we don't give a shit if anyone even shows. I'm sort of hoping that nobody does, except maybe my dad, her mom, and my brothers, AKA  the sane wing of my extended family.
First time I've looked forward to the holidays in at least 20 years. Fuckin' eh right.
 
 

I'm ready gents. Got some sides coming via parents and brothers, but the beef, bourbon and beer is all I am concerned about. One day I'll buy my son a bottle of Weller for getting us out of all the family BS and letting us start this new low-maintenance tradition.

Challenge will be making it through the Saints game before I hit the brisket and booze coma.


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[Guest]

No French dressing?

[burntorangebongos 10752]

niiiiiiice meat!

[Anastasis 23471]

I’m just splaying out rep. Sitting here with my relatively functional dysfunctional family hammering 1910, wine and paella. 

[BradInATX 9208]

1 minute ago, Anastasis said:

I’m just splaying out rep. Sitting here with my relatively functional dysfunctional family hammering 1910, wine and paella. 

How is the 1910? Keep hearing good things, just waiting to open it. I might say F it and open it tonight and pre-game Thanksgiving.

[BradInATX 9208]

Nm.. it's delicious

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[Gil Bang 26070]

slightly off-topic, but bitching about Tday related:

I''ve received "Happy Thanksgiving" emails today from every motherfucker that I've ever done business  with, and also from every motherfucker that would like to do business with me.

Sorry to break it to you, Mr. Title rep, but my Tday won't be better because you clogged up my email inbox.

[Chewbacca 7788]

What do people think about the 1910 vs the 1920?

[burntorangebongos 10752]

6 minutes ago, Gil Bang said:

slightly off-topic, but bitching about Tday related:

I''ve received "Happy Thanksgiving" emails today from every motherfucker that I've ever done business  with, and also from every motherfucker that would like to do business with me.

Sorry to break it to you, Mr. Title rep, but my Tday won't be better because you clogged up my email inbox.

oooooohhh, just the right amount of Surly, bro. WTF damn peepo!

[Anastasis 23471]

18 minutes ago, BradInATX said:

Nm.. it's delicious

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
 

I will come back when I have not rep my friend. 

[Anastasis 23471]

5 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

What do people think about the 1910 vs the 1920?

Love both.

[Incredulity 11684]

The holidays are just about the only time my wife and I fight.  Guess what, it’s caused by her mother.  It’s such a fucking cliche I can hardly stand it.  I sit there and watch this shit storm coming from miles away every year, just can’t get out of the way.  It is actually impressive the amount of effort she puts into being a victim/pity case/cunt.

[BradInATX 9208]

What do people think about the 1910 vs the 1920?

Both are good, but this 1910 is fantastic.

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[Chewbacca 7788]

I have not seen 1910 up here yet. 1920 is everywhere.

[Bill Brasky 1470]

I enjoy being not invited to Thanksgiving because "the house is already too crowded"

3 bed, 2 bath house, 1 bedroom made into an office, 1 bedroom made into a workout room, leaving an air mattress, another air mattress, a couch, a sofa, and the master bedroom for 5 people with me being the 5th.   

 

Edited November 22, 2018 by Bill Brasky

[Guest Lobo]

My in laws also feel that a good night sleep is only something for the idle rich.  Our guest room is about to be a nursery. The bedroom downstairs has a decent sized closet and bathroom but has always been outfitted as an office since we bought the house.  Both the wife and I work from home several hours a week.

Clean hotels down the street for a low rate and comfy lodging for everyone, including my toddler and pregnant wife?   Nah!  Not with this fucking crew.  Six grown adults strewn about the common living spaces of my home on air beds and sofas. The three+ of us left to negotiate their luggage and shoes and electronics like a shitty Atari game.  Nice people though.  

[LTbear 4172]

On 11/20/2018 at 11:43 AM, Al_4_ISU said:

Our main issue is managing appearances.  My parents are divorced and fucking hate each other, and her parents are married.  I have a lot of extended family on my dad's side who live within an hour of us, and they're a god damned hoot, so I usually try to add that to mix.  

There's not that much drama other than trying to figure out who gets what day.  We came up with a system where every 3 years one set of parents gets to pick their choice of day between Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day.  We try to give her folks a few extra days (usually in the post Thanksgiving weekend) to make up for my family getting more individual specific holidays.  My dad always takes Thanksgiving (doesn't give a shit about Xmas), and my mom always takes Xmas (doesn't give a shit about Thanksgiving), but whenever it's her folks year to take first pick, they can never make their minds up, and that's where the drama starts. 

If I try to get things wrapped up so everyone can have a plan and move forward with life, my MIL blows up, and accuses me of having to control everything, and guilt trips my wife over it.  Then she acts like my family always gets favoritism (we spend far more casual time with my wife's family throughout the year) because she's incapable of seeing anything beyond her tiny self-centered worldview.  She's just a generally negative and unappreciative person who constantly judges the outside world, but holds her little clan (which I can never be part of) to a different standard.

My FIL, on the other hand, is a fucking blast.  He's always cooking up something crazy and getting Bloodys, beers, and rye flowing early.  Eventually, my MIL will start in with "JESUS BOB.  HOW MUCH HAVE YOU HAD TO DRINK" and he starts yelling.  Or, if her only extended family (aunt/uncle and 2 cousins from Chicago) are home, there will be an inevitable political conversation in which her cousins (who are intolerantly left wing - and I say this as a left winger) tell my father in law (who is basically just uniformed and sorta populist, but likes Trump) that he's a racist, and yelling happens.  This is when I go out to the kitchen and start watching football.  Then my wife comes at me later and says "you know, it would be nice if you were a little more engaged with my family".  When I point out to her that her 26 year old brother who still lives at home spent all but 2 hours of the day smoking weed and playing video games in his bedroom, she says "he can do that", openly acknowledging the double standard and revealing that this whole spiel came from her mom.

We've already done my mom's (last Saturday) and will see my dad on Thursday.  Friday is the big meal with her family, and the Chicago contingent (at least her aunt and uncle) will be back.  Chicago uncle (grew up in same town where her folks did and still live) will want to watch Iowa/Nebraska, so at least someone else will be making the call to put football on.  

Jesus 

[Guest]

17 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Yes.  Both of the cousins live in Seattle now, but are from Chicago originally, where the aunt & uncle (their parents) still live.  One lived in NYC for a bit, and they're both extremely judgmental and intensely left wing (no CR - like I said earlier, I'm left of center myself - I'm just not into attacking people for their politics).  Basically, my MIL's tendency to judge the shit out of everyone is well preserved in that blood line (MIL's sister's kids).

At least their husbands are good dudes that like to drink beer.

You know what I love about politics on family get togethers?

The results of your decisions/ philosophies are readily available for everyone to see.

If someone gets ugly/ judgmental, we're going all the way down that fucking road.

The key to stemming this bullshit tide, is to be so brutally honest that the fucksticks don't even dare going there.  So let's just play it safe and talk about booze and jason garrett, OK?

Edited November 22, 2018 by slorch

[LongestHorn 759]

On 11/8/2018 at 9:22 PM, YoungCounty said:

This is by far my favorite thread of the year. 

My sister is a complete bitch. Holidays make it worse. She is the type that posts shit on Facebook in October about being excited that the Hallmark channel will soon be showing 55 straight days of Christmas movies. Or whatever the fuck that channel does. 

She is so full of shit. In real life, she usually brings my mom to tears each Christmas. It’s a complete shit show. I dread it. My wife, kids and I go simply for my mom. 

This year my sis scheduled some sort of family portrait thing the Tuesday before thanksgiving. I 100% guarantee it will be a disaster and people will leave pissed off with several in tears. Going to be a horrible start to the holidays. 

But we go to my wife’s side the day after, and they kick ass. Can’t wait. Christmas is even better, because her mom pays for hotel rooms for all adults for one night while she watches all the grandkids. We get to go bar hopping for the night, getting shit faced liked we did when we were in our 20’s. 

[luke duke 6420]

I enjoy being not invited to Thanksgiving because "the house is already too crowded"
3 bed, 2 bath house, 1 bedroom made into an office, 1 bedroom made into a workout room, leaving an air mattress, another air mattress, a couch, a sofa, and the master bedroom for 5 people with me being the 5th.   
 

So what’s the difference between a couch and a sofa?

[Al_4_ISU 12516]

6 hours ago, LTbear said:

Jesus 

I actually felt better after reading through this thread.

[GhostOfTomJoad 9381]

Holy shit. Just took my dog for a walk around 5:45AM. Pitch dark out, & I only turn on my headlamp flashlight when I need to pick up her poop so we were pretty stealthy. Come around a dark corner a couple streets from my house to hear a front door slam loudly followed by a man's voice saying "I fucking KNEW she was going to pull this bullshit today" before he climbed into his truck to speed off somewhere. He never saw me or didn't care I was there to witness his outburst (I'm just thankful my dog didn't compound things by taking a growler in his front yard). I was laughing like a fool for the rest of the walk. 

I sincerely hope it was a poster from here & we're gonna get the rest of the story.

Edited November 22, 2018 by GhostOfTomJoad

[DejaVu 39]

Everyone brought their pets to my sister’s house this year. I’m sitting on the couch with three dogs snoring away on it. Everyone else in the house is still asleep. I walked all the dogs and fed them this morning. I’m the only one feeding them or walking them. Apparently, this is a service that I provide for free and spares everyone the expensiveness of kenneling, which is what I did with my own dog in order to travel here. 

My niece has asked me to lend her cash three times since I’ve arrived. She asked for $400. She’s 12. I mentioned this to my sister, who just shrugged. 

[Bill Brasky 1470]

38 minutes ago, luke duke said:

 

So what’s the difference between a couch and a sofa?

 

is loveseat the right word?  couch seats 3, sofa seats 2 

[Post Oak 20312]

13 hours ago, BradInATX said:

I'm ready gents. Got some sides coming via parents and brothers, but the beef, bourbon and beer is all I am concerned about. One day I'll buy my son a bottle of Weller for getting us out of all the family BS and letting us start this new low-maintenance tradition.

Challenge will be making it through the Saints game before I hit the brisket and booze coma.


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Wow.  On my way and

 

[Parliament 14357]

My sister is a CPA, married to a veterinarian. Brother is a Colonel in the US Army. He commands tanks or some goddamn thing. He goes through girlfriends like they're candy. Current gf is a gymnastics coach. Whatever. She annoys me. Dad is OCD about cooking. He frets for MONTHS ahead of the holiday about the right seasoning, rub, etc.

Anyway, with the bad economy I haven't been getting much work. But do you think they'll help me? Lol no. Even with my chronic back problems (old football injury) they don't give me shit. Screw 'em.

[Anastasis 23471]

Pics of coach?

[Anastasis 23471]

Oh and you sound like a free loader.