Anything new in Key West?

[Shaddie 1651]

Ok. Laugh at me all you want. Happy wife, bearable life or something like that.

Been 10 years and it was ok, not great then. Any good breakfast spots, new things to do, or new things to see?

 

[Armybrat 40936]

Ok, bumping this dead thread.

Several friends are planning to meet in Key West in late January. We never have been there, so need info/advice on decent (but not bankroll-busting) places to stay. What’s the easiest way to fly there from Austin? Rent a car in town or drive down from Miami?

Edited April 12, 2019 by Armybrat

[Bill Brasky 1465]

I like flying into Miami or Ft. Lauderdale and taking a rental car down.   Maybe stay a night on the mainland because if you leave at the wrong time the traffic will be a bitch around Key Largo and Islamorada.   I usually stay at a place within stumbling distance of Duval St. since its usually a party trip.   I also get a rental with a kitchen because I usually like cooking breakfast or lunch on my own and then dining out at night.  

[Ted Lange 16144]

For breakfast/brunch, Blue Heaven. https://www.blueheavenkw.com/

 

[Johnny Sack 8397]

I think it's a dump.  Rent something in Marathon instead.

[Kennythetiger 9483]

2 hours ago, Armybrat said:

Ok, bumping this dead thread.

Several friends are planning to meet in Key West in late January. We never have been there, so need info/advice on decent (but not bankroll-busting) places to stay. What’s the easiest way to fly there from Austin? Rent a car in town or drive down from Miami?

You might watch out for the Mile 0 Fest, unless that's why you're going.  I myself would love to hit it sometime, but it may clog up your hotels, restaurants, etc.  It was Jan 29-Feb 2 this year.

[Gil Bang 26052]

Brat, the drive down from Miami is something.   I'd recommend that. 

We stayed an a super cool place that was affordable.  Parking can be a motherfucker, so rent the smallest car that you can be comfortable in. 

I made the mistake of renting a big SUV because I was gonna need to haul some shit back in Palm Beach a few days later.  I fucked up.

The driveway into the hotel was so narrow that I backed out, looking at my right mirror and dragging my left hand long the block wall along the drive.

I'll look at my old credit cards and find the place we stayed.  It was back off Duval street far enough to not be too noisy.   

[Gil Bang 26052]

t

 

The driveway as referenced above.  Still working on the name of the joint. 

Edited April 13, 2019 by Gil Bang

[DalTxHornFan 3119]

SW has direct flights from AUS to FLL.  Easy and fast drive down south from the airport to Homestead on the tollways west of Miami (I don't like Miami much).  There is a great Hard Rock casino on that route if you wanted to do a night on the mainland before hitting the Overseas Highway.  That can be a really cool drive over the bridges from island to island if traffic isn't screwed up.  With only two lanes most of the way down, it doesn't take much for traffic to get screwed up. 

Eat some conch in Key Largo on the way down.  The Garden of Eden nightclub would be a must for your crew!  https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g34345-d575431-Reviews-Garden_of_Eden-Key_West_Florida_Keys_Florida.html

[After irth 1245]

Key West Harbor Inn. Tracy and her staff are the best. Cozy, comfy, breakfast and happy hour included. Far enough from Duval to be quiet, but still right in the middle of everything. 

Also...the above rec on Blue Heaven is seconded here. 

[Bill Brasky 1465]

yeah parking is a mother fucker in Key West, but it is entertaining to watch all the idiots on mopeds wipe out 

[MrPhlegm 3413]

Flying into MIA or FLL is an either or. FLL is a 20 mile longer drive but an easier airport. Fl turnpike and turnpike extension will take you to Florida City. From Florida City you can go the way most everybody goes or take Card Sound Road. Both ways take you to Key Largo.

Fish House in Key Largo is legit. Pennecamp State Park is nearby for snorkeling. They used to have a discount on the 9am snorkeling trip. We used to do that and then hit up the Fish House for lunch.

For your rent car get a convertible. 7 mile bridge is spectacular with the top down.

[Steamboat1874 4087]

https://www.webcamtaxi.com/en/usa/florida/sloppy-joes-duval-street.html

 

[Kennythetiger 9483]

What the fuck was that from Phlegm?

[MAUFRAIS 6642]

I like me some Pepe’s.


Also, you should definitely go to the garden of eden with your old balls gross.

[Pescado_Rojo 19441]

American also has a direct flight from AUS to MIA. 

[Prepuce of Doom 21110]

If you fly into MIA or FLL and drive down, take the Card Sound Road route and find out what the maximum speed of your rental car is. You can even drive it once at a reasonable speed just to make sure that no cops are hiding, then flip a U-turn, hit Vmax, turn around again, hit Vmax again, and go on your original route. Fun way to spend 15 minutes.

And that's going to be the last opportunity for you to drive fast on that trip, so just resign yourself to it and fall in line. Don't bother getting impatient - there's nothing you can do about it. 

Stop at Keys Fisheries & Marina in Marathon for a lobster reuben, some stone crabs, and peel and eats. You can watch your food come in off the boat if you happen to get there at the right time. 

https://www.keysfisheries.com/

Edited April 17, 2019 by Prepuce of Doom

[BottleRocket 647]

Can’t you fly in to Ft Myers and take the Key West Ferry Express? That’s the way to do it.

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

Just found this thread. I am in Key West at least twice a year, I live about 4.5 hours away. Here are my random thoughts/suggestions:

• if you like driving, aren't in a rush the drive down the overseas highway is nice (once) some great restaurants along the way I would recommend the Square Grouper at MM 25
• if you want to do the drive, fly into MIA or FLL, rent a car there and leave it in key west and fly out of key west. You do not need a car on the island and the drive back sucks
• the ferry from Fort Myers is a good way to go, takes about 3.5-4 hours, during season you can also catch a ferry out of Marco Island. If you go down on a holiday weekend there are often strippers on the boat heading down
• strip clubs are hit and miss there, the main ones are Red Garter, bare assets and Teasers
• I stay at the Hyatt Centric on Front, mainly because I have tons of points that makes it cheap but there are a wide range of places to stay, if you want to hit Duval I would stay in old town, it may be a little more expensive but you will save on cabs
• great breakfast places - two friends, breakfast club too, moon dog cafe
• if you are a diver the Vandenberg is a great dive, I use southpoint divers
• lunch and dinner I usually just eat at the bar I am currently in, but Hogfish is good - it is actually on Stock Island
• you can do the normal bars Sloppy Joes, Irish Kevins, Captain Tony's etc - tons of good entertainers
• if you are a microbrew fan, waterfront brewing is pretty good, decent food as well
• if you need to kill some time during the day away from the bar and do not want to go out on the water, the Key west cemetery is pretty cool - there are more dead people on the island than living people
• if you are hungover, IVs in the keys is awesome, takes about 45 minutes, re-hydrates you and gets rid of 90% of your hangover
• Jet ski tour of the island is a good way to see it from the water
• If you can get a table outside on the rail at Amigos at night the food is meh,  but it is entertaining to watch the drunk people try and throw a quarter in the Grouper's mouth at Captain Tonys
• If there is a decent concert at the Ampitheater, it is a great venue, built last year - I saw slightly stoopid, matisyahu and tribal seeds there in June. only draw back was there was not a lot of shade from the sun
• They say the only way to get arrested in Key West is to be an asshole or hassle the chickens

 

[Gil Bang 26052]

3 hours ago, Ogie Ogilthorpe said:

Just found this thread. I am in Key West at least twice a year, I live about 4.5 hours away. Here are my random thoughts/suggestions:

• if you like driving, aren't in a rush the drive down the overseas highway is nice (once) some great restaurants along the way I would recommend the Square Grouper at MM 25
• if you want to do the drive, fly into MIA or FLL, rent a car there and leave it in key west and fly out of key west. You do not need a car on the island and the drive back sucks
• the ferry from Fort Myers is a good way to go, takes about 3.5-4 hours, during season you can also catch a ferry out of Marco Island. If you go down on a holiday weekend there are often strippers on the boat heading down
• strip clubs are hit and miss there, the main ones are Red Garter, bare assets and Teasers
• I stay at the Hyatt Centric on Front, mainly because I have tons of points that makes it cheap but there are a wide range of places to stay, if you want to hit Duval I would stay in old town, it may be a little more expensive but you will save on cabs
• great breakfast places - two friends, breakfast club too, moon dog cafe
• if you are a diver the Vandenberg is a great dive, I use southpoint divers
• lunch and dinner I usually just eat at the bar I am currently in, but Hogfish is good - it is actually on Stock Island
• you can do the normal bars Sloppy Joes, Irish Kevins, Captain Tony's etc - tons of good entertainers
• if you are a microbrew fan, waterfront brewing is pretty good, decent food as well
• if you need to kill some time during the day away from the bar and do not want to go out on the water, the Key west cemetery is pretty cool - there are more dead people on the island than living people
• if you are hungover, IVs in the keys is awesome, takes about 45 minutes, re-hydrates you and gets rid of 90% of your hangover
• Jet ski tour of the island is a good way to see it from the water
• If you can get a table outside on the rail at Amigos at night the food is meh,  but it is entertaining to watch the drunk people try and throw a quarter in the Grouper's mouth at Captain Tonys
• If there is a decent concert at the Ampitheater, it is a great venue, built last year - I saw slightly stoopid, matisyahu and tribal seeds there in June. only draw back was there was not a lot of shade from the sun
• They say the only way to get arrested in Key West is to be an asshole or hassle the chickens

 

Hey Ogie...last time I was in Key West there was a checkpoint at the end of the island.  Anybody with pets had to get them checked.  Something about deer ticks.  Is that still going on?

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

I saw that a few years back in Key Largo, but haven't seen it in a while. I think it would also only be an issue if you were to spend time on Big Pine with the key deer.

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

1 hour ago, Ogie Ogilthorpe said:

I saw that a few years back in Key Largo, but haven't seen it in a while. I think it would also only be an issue if you were to spend time on Big Pine with the key deer.

it could be a seasonal thing too. It wasn’t there in June or January but last summer I took my boat down so I wouldn’t know if it a summer issue

[Uncle Boobs 1248]

t
 
The driveway as referenced above.  Still working on the name of the joint. 

That's tighter than a frog's ass.

[Gil Bang 26052]

going in wasn't so bad.  Backing out was a motherfucker.

[Gil Bang 26052]

On 4/12/2019 at 5:26 PM, Gil Bang said:

t

 

The driveway as referenced above.  Still working on the name of the joint. 

Just came across the receipt.   "Casa 325".  325 Duval. http://casa325.com/

 

 

 

 

 

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

On 4/12/2019 at 10:13 AM, Armybrat said:

What’s the easiest way to fly there from Austin? Rent a car in town or drive down from Miami?

yep.

[tantric superman 4668]

On 4/12/2019 at 9:04 PM, After irth said:

Key West Harbor Inn. Tracy and her staff are the best. Cozy, comfy, breakfast and happy hour included. Far enough from Duval to be quiet, but still right in the middle of everything. 

Hey all, any more recommendations on "quiet enough places" would be appreciated.   We'd rather be off whatever main drag there is, and are plenty happy walking around everywhere.   Wife will probably want to a couple of very nice restaurants.

(Thanks for the input on parking...)

[Gil Bang 26052]

The main drag is Duval.

[MAUFRAIS 6642]

[bmbmd 1027]

It's worth noting (imo) that the old Fox series "Key West" is up on YouTube.  The quality is poor, but man I loved that show. Fisher Stevens and young Jennifer Tilly.  

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

20 hours ago, tantric superman said:

Hey all, any more recommendations on "quiet enough places" would be appreciated.   We'd rather be off whatever main drag there is, and are plenty happy walking around everywhere.   Wife will probably want to a couple of very nice restaurants.

(Thanks for the input on parking...)

Anywhere off Duval will be quiet enough, as I mentioned in an earlier post I stay at the Hyatt Centric, great location on Front Street, 5 minute walk to Duval/Malory Square also near Key West Bight which has some nice places as well. The Pier house is right beside the Hyatt, never stayed there but I hear it is nice.

There is also another Hyatt (sunset house I think) and Margaritaville which is the old westin right by Mallory Square. Can have more foot traffic there because of the cruise ships.

There are a tine of B&Bs that are off Duval that are supposed to be pretty good if you like the B&B thing.

[tantric superman 4668]

Wife told me she made a reservation at Casa Marina Key West (because it looked the quietest).  Trying to switch flights to go straight into Key West. 

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

12 hours ago, tantric superman said:

Wife told me she made a reservation at Casa Marina Key West (because it looked the quietest).  Trying to switch flights to go straight into Key West. 

Nice place, try Louie's back for dinner, right near the hotel

[tantric superman 4668]

Louie's looks perfect.  Thanks.

Last request and I will leave you alone. 

Wife would like to get on the water on a nice boat (catamaranish) for a couple of hours and go see something.  (Dolphins, Cuban pirates, manatees) without getting in the water.

I'd love to get my fat ass in the water (snorkel-ish, not a scuba guy).  

Any recs for particular go-to excursions/companies would be appreciated. 

 

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

51 minutes ago, tantric superman said:

Louie's looks perfect.  Thanks.

Last request and I will leave you alone. 

Wife would like to get on the water on a nice boat (catamaranish) for a couple of hours and go see something.  (Dolphins, Cuban pirates, manatees) without getting in the water.

I'd love to get my fat ass in the water (snorkel-ish, not a scuba guy).  

Any recs for particular go-to excursions/companies would be appreciated. 

 

The big operators on the island are Sebago and Fury. They run big catamarans out of the bight. If you go to the bight there are tons of other operators as well ranging in size and price, it also happens to be where Key West Brewery is for some pints and decent food.

If you are staying at the Casa Marina, ask the concierge their, I met her at a Slightly Stoopid concert there June and she has been doing it for years so she will have the best recommendations based on what you are looking for. I can't remember her name for sure but I think it was Sara.

[tantric superman 4668]

Damn, I feel like I'm set.  Just got to finalize my wardrobe.  My chacos gonna be funky by the end of this trip!

 

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

Just got back from Key West, found a new bar just off Duval on Simonton in the same plaza as DIvers Direct, The Retro room. A laid back place good craft beer selection. If you want to take a break from the Duval scene it is a nice refuge. A bit more of a local place.

 

[midtown 3348]

On 4/19/2019 at 10:11 PM, BottleRocket said:

Can’t you fly in to Ft Myers and take the Key West Ferry Express? That’s the way to do it.

You can take the ferry or take the puddle jumper at night from RSW.   It flies low and right along the coast.   Really great view.

I haven't been down there in 10 years but I agree with a lot of the above comments on restaurants.   The best way to describe Key West is that it's basically New Orleans but on an island.

[Ogie Ogilthorpe 639]

1 hour ago, midtown said:

You can take the ferry or take the puddle jumper at night from RSW.   It flies low and right along the coast.   Really great view.

I haven't been down there in 10 years but I agree with a lot of the above comments on restaurants.   The best way to describe Key West is that it's basically New Orleans but on an island.

The flights from RSW stopped a few years ago, Cape Air and Silver Airways used to do it. Now the only option is to charter a plane out of Naples or Marco. If you have a group of people it is worth it but is pricey for 1 or 2 people.

[midtown 3348]

Well shit. That sucks. I guess when they expanded the airport to allow bigger planes it made that route obsolete.

[DallasGatr 216]

It ain’t cheap but Sunset Key is the only way to do Key West. You stay in paradise and play with the unwashed on Duval.

[tantric superman 4668]

Had a good time.  The jet ski trip around the Island was essential.  I really liked the vibe, but we were pre-Spring  break so pretty chill.  Going to try to get on the water a lot more next time.

Why the fuck don't people jump in the water more in February?  Water was wonderful and bracing.  The folks who lined the pool sunning themselves got to watch the fat loco old mexican go in and out of the pool, perfecting his stroke.  

Not a big drinker, so can't report on the best bars.  Me and the wife got our steps in.

I thought the Hemingway House, and the Truman Little Whitehouse were great.  Coast Guard Museum (USS Ingram) was a great little find.  Learned a whole hell of a lot.

Eats:  Nine One Five - terrific.  Lower Duval.

Louie's Backyard - great service, food really a bit on the heavy side.

Cafe Marquesa - dawdling service.

Martin's - sat us in a pinch with no reservations.  Solid.

Breakfasty/Lunchy - I thought Moondog cafe was good and liked sitting on that porch.

Saw a bit of live music -- couple of good bands but most of the live music was pretty terrible.

Casa Marina - vastly overpriced but easy and really liked the location.  Really liked how easy this town is to walk. 

Yeah, will try to figure out a better and quicker trip in next time.  The drive from Ft. Lauterdale much too long.  February though cool seems like a good month for visiting.

[immamac 43230]

Headed there to do this. This thread was mega helpful will post updates. 

[StassneyHorn 6648]

Just got back from 4 days there for a bachelor party. Didn’t splurge on food much, Amigos had great tacos and prime viewing to watch people throw coins into the grouper and ppl watch. Tacos were just as great when I went sober. The sloppy Joe at Sloppy Joes isn’t built for inflation and hard to justify 12 dollars for taco meat on a bun with a pickle. Please don’t fight me.

Red Garter > Teasers for strip club experience. Has two stages, an upstairs if you want to give them all your money and still leave holding your dick in your hand, and an outside area that has a band playing. Never made it to bare assets. Russians overwhelmingly make up the ladies.

Dont get sucked into a catamaran trip. We thought ours was private but there must have been 100+ others with families. Billed as a Rum n Reggae trip, got our money back after a friend was told he was too drunk to be on the boat so that was a great save. Wish I would’ve done the jet ski tour. The seaweed stench was pretty bad at some of the beaches but looked like the city was cleaning up when we’re leaving.

Hadn’t seen Dante’s mentioned. Great pool party spot to lose your mind on bachelor/eye parties or divorce/birthday parties.

[midtown 3348]

2 hours ago, StassneyHorn said:

Red Garter > Teasers for strip club experience. Has two stages, an upstairs if you want to give them all your money and still leave holding your dick in your hand, and an outside area that has a band playing. Never made it to bare assets. Russians overwhelmingly make up the ladies.

[Gil Bang 26052]

I'm in the middle of two weeks in Key Colony Beach on Marathon.  It's a little warm this time of year, but not crowded at all.  

House-sitting (and dog sitting) in a fucking waterfront mansion.  Sitting on the patio now, looking across the pool at the Atlantic. 

[Shoxthemonkey 1983]

On 5/10/2023 at 11:43 AM, Gil Bang said:

I'm in the middle of two weeks in Key Colony Beach on Marathon.  It's a little warm this time of year, but not crowded at all.  

House-sitting (and dog sitting) in a fucking waterfront mansion.  Sitting on the patio now, looking across the pool at the Atlantic. 

I'll be driving through Marathon this coming Tuesday evening. I'll buy your supper and drinks if you will stand by the road with a piece of cardboard that you have scrawled with "Muledick!".

 

[Gil Bang 26052]

1 minute ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

I'll be driving through Marathon this coming Tuesday evening. I'll buy your supper and drinks if you will stand by the road with a piece of cardboard that you have scrawled with "Muledick!".

 

Headed back to Miami Tuesday afternoon.    Sorry to disappoint you.  That would be a fucking hoot.