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Uncle Rico can't even throw the ball 80 yards, you dumbass...

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Your Mom

Your Mom 4852

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This is just from some random website, nothing official, and the measurement looks a little off in some of them... But suffice to say the biggest arms in the NFL rarely go beyond 65 yards.

Edited by Your Mom
Edited to say fuck you NFL for not allowing imbedding of stupid shit like this.
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Ok so recap of today's festivities...

First off, the weather was awesome. Calm, sunshiny, and a brisk 50 degrees. We came expecting someone to back out but the main shit-talkers showed. We gave them choice of NFL ball or collegiate, inflated to their whim, with a handpump and needle available. We have a very large warehouse and we offered them indoors or out and they agreed on outdoors because of possibility of hitting lights in warehouse.  So we go outside and the other "helper" and I start measuring off distance at 25' increments. 

We get to 150' and call out that it is 50 yards to that mark.  The original discussion was 80 yards and then it came down to 65. We went ahead and measured out to 240'.  One of the guys exclaims, 'Wow, eighty yards is farther than I thought it was."   du-uhhhh!!!!!!!!  We all bust out laughing and tell him, "No shit.  that's why we called you on it, but you kept on and on and on.  So here we are..."

I am playing catch with the other guy for warm up and they start trying to talk me into trying.  I tell them fuck no.  I throw a pretty ball at 25-30 yards.  That's it for me.  Maybe 25 years ago i would have hit 55-60, but not now.  No way.  Helper2 is warming up the other guy and he tells them to kick rocks.  We weren't the ones running our mouths... Meanwhile 2 of our younger college boys show up and start throwing.  One played college hoops at the DIII level or some shit.  very humble guy.

So contestant 1 starts trying longer throws and eventually hits 45 yards.  We ask him when he's going to do one that counts. So he has two attempts that go about 45 yards again. contestant2 disappears... we are LOAO as he eventually returns.  He attempts 3 throws and hits 40 yards.  This is the guy who originally said 80.  College hoops guy walks up and hits 50 yards twice.  He never talked shit, just wanted to see what he could throw.

I originally proposed the Uncle Rico day to shut these guys up from talking like they could chunk the hell outta the football.  Well that premise was a complete and utter failure.  Now they are talking about having a 'mini Olympics' in the Spring so they can 'train(LOFL!!!!!!!!!!!)' for it.

We, the coworkers, have already determined that it will be offsite and there will be tailgating while these 2 boys entertain us with:

100m dash

40m dash

Baseball relay of some sort starting with third to home and working their way out to left field fence.  Showing off their awesome arms again.

pushups

400m race/ one lap around track.

3 other events TBA.

WTF hath we wrought?  LOLz.  Hopefully the EMTs are not too far from the park.

sorry no film of the events today.  Company is pretty firm on that shit, regarding events on site.

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BrazilHorn

BrazilHorn 6633

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1 hour ago, slorch said:

Ok so recap of today's festivities...

First off, the weather was awesome. Calm, sunshiny, and a brisk 50 degrees. We came expecting someone to back out but the main shit-talkers showed. We gave them choice of NFL ball or collegiate, inflated to their whim, with a handpump and needle available. We have a very large warehouse and we offered them indoors or out and they agreed on outdoors because of possibility of hitting lights in warehouse.  So we go outside and the other "helper" and I start measuring off distance at 25' increments. 

We get to 150' and call out that it is 50 yards to that mark.  The original discussion was 80 yards and then it came down to 65. We went ahead and measured out to 240'.  One of the guys exclaims, 'Wow, eighty yards is farther than I thought it was."   du-uhhhh!!!!!!!!  We all bust out laughing and tell him, "No shit.  that's why we called you on it, but you kept on and on and on.  So here we are..."

I am playing catch with the other guy for warm up and they start trying to talk me into trying.  I tell them fuck no.  I throw a pretty ball at 25-30 yards.  That's it for me.  Maybe 25 years ago i would have hit 55-60, but not now.  No way.  Helper2 is warming up the other guy and he tells them to kick rocks.  We weren't the ones running our mouths... Meanwhile 2 of our younger college boys show up and start throwing.  One played college hoops at the DIII level or some shit.  very humble guy.

So contestant 1 starts trying longer throws and eventually hits 45 yards.  We ask him when he's going to do one that counts. So he has two attempts that go about 45 yards again. contestant2 disappears... we are LOAO as he eventually returns.  He attempts 3 throws and hits 40 yards.  This is the guy who originally said 80.  College hoops guy walks up and hits 50 yards twice.  He never talked shit, just wanted to see what he could throw.

I originally proposed the Uncle Rico day to shut these guys up from talking like they could chunk the hell outta the football.  Well that premise was a complete and utter failure.  Now they are talking about having a 'mini Olympics' in the Spring so they can 'train(LOFL!!!!!!!!!!!)' for it.

We, the coworkers, have already determined that it will be offsite and there will be tailgating while these 2 boys entertain us with:

100m dash

40m dash

Baseball relay of some sort starting with third to home and working their way out to left field fence.  Showing off their awesome arms again.

pushups

400m race/ one lap around track.

3 other events TBA.

WTF hath we wrought?  LOLz.  Hopefully the EMTs are not too far from the park.

sorry no film of the events today.  Company is pretty firm on that shit, regarding events on site.

Add a beer mile

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7 minutes ago, BrazilHorn said:

Add a beer mile

I'm trying to work guns into it...LOL

I suggested a biathlon, H-town style.  Run a quarter mile and shoot at a target... repeat.

Now I recall the game of H-O-R-S-E being discussed.

We are definitely open to suggestions.

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Armybrat

Armybrat 40908

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9 hours ago, Incredulity said:

I would make a big wager they are under 40 yards.

40-50 for a person who has training and is athletic is really good.

NFL QB's with BIG arms push 90yds.

 

About 80 years ago my dad saw Jim Thorpe throw the rock from goal line to goal line in a halftime exhibition at Missouri.

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RPM

RPM 26353

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Posted
1 hour ago, slorch said:

I originally proposed the Uncle Rico day to shut these guys up from talking like they could chunk the hell outta the football.  Well that premise was a complete and utter failure.  Now they are talking about having a 'mini Olympics' in the Spring so they can 'train(LOFL!!!!!!!!!!!)' for it.

We, the coworkers, have already determined that it will be offsite and there will be tailgating while these 2 boys entertain us with:

100m dash

40m dash

Baseball relay of some sort starting with third to home and working their way out to left field fence.  Showing off their awesome arms again.

pushups

400m race/ one lap around track.

3 other events TBA.

WTF hath we wrought?  LOLz.  Hopefully the EMTs are not too far from the park.

You better have CPR and AED refresher training the day before. I also propose they be named the Gurney Games.

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Sandman

Sandman 3412

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Posted

My friend came over to watch fireworks a couple of years ago and brought his teenaged son. I only have girls, so I always break out the Wilson 1001 whenever the opportunity presents itself. The boy plays football at school, so he started running routes and I was slinging passes like crazy. But after a while my arm...just wouldn't work right anymore. I literally couldn't throw a ball more than 10 feet. It was such a helpless feeling.

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Vic Mackey

Vic Mackey 47149

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Posted (edited)
20 hours ago, Your Mom said:

This is just from some random website, nothing official, and the measurement looks a little off in some of them... But suffice to say the biggest arms in the NFL rarely go beyond 65 yards.

Yes but this is live game action. Just standing around with no defense to worry about and in warmup clothes, I am sure some of them could get further than that. I bet Jamarcus Russell and Jeff George and some others could throw it about 75-80 in those conditions.

Edited by Vic Mackey
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texasdago

texasdago 7579

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11 minutes ago, Sandman said:

My friend came over to watch fireworks a couple of years ago and brought his teenaged son. I only have girls, so I always break out the Wilson 1001 whenever the opportunity presents itself. The boy plays football at school, so he started running routes and I was slinging passes like crazy. But after a while my arm...just wouldn't work right anymore. I literally couldn't throw a ball more than 10 feet. It was such a helpless feeling.

Image result for colt mccoy locker room alabama

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SpiralOut

SpiralOut 1818

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I played football in high school in a small west Texas town.  Our QB was a scrambler and yeah, we didn't throw the ball all that much.  We did great running and also having our super mobile QB scramble around, but we only completed maybe 5 passes a game, if that.

Anyway, one day at the end of practice we're on the field and it was kind of like Slorch's situation with some non-QB guys bragging about how far they could toss the rock.  They all failed miserably like we knew they would.  Then, our Center picks up the ball.  Nice guy, but definitely not at all athletic.  Just a shortish, pudgy dude who was already going bald at 18.  Probably the weakest blocker on the line, but always got his assignments right and did his job.  We're like, "Billy, there ain't no way you're gonna try throwing that ball.  Put it down."  He looks at us, smiles, and throws the most beautiful spiral I've ever seen in my life from the goal line to the opposing 40.  We're all so in shock no one really says anything.  He grabs another ball and does it again.  Now we're all freaking out.  We ask him why he's never told us about his sweet throwing abilities.  He says, "Because no one ever asked." 

/csb

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Macanudo

Macanudo 13012

Posted
Posted (edited)
21 hours ago, slorch said:

Ok so recap of today's festivities...

First off, the weather was awesome. Calm, sunshiny, and a brisk 50 degrees. We came expecting someone to back out but the main shit-talkers showed. We gave them choice of NFL ball or collegiate, inflated to their whim, with a handpump and needle available. We have a very large warehouse and we offered them indoors or out and they agreed on outdoors because of possibility of hitting lights in warehouse.  So we go outside and the other "helper" and I start measuring off distance at 25' increments. 

We get to 150' and call out that it is 50 yards to that mark.  The original discussion was 80 yards and then it came down to 65. We went ahead and measured out to 240'.  One of the guys exclaims, 'Wow, eighty yards is farther than I thought it was."   du-uhhhh!!!!!!!!  We all bust out laughing and tell him, "No shit.  that's why we called you on it, but you kept on and on and on.  So here we are..."

I am playing catch with the other guy for warm up and they start trying to talk me into trying.  I tell them fuck no.  I throw a pretty ball at 25-30 yards.  That's it for me.  Maybe 25 years ago i would have hit 55-60, but not now.  No way.  Helper2 is warming up the other guy and he tells them to kick rocks.  We weren't the ones running our mouths... Meanwhile 2 of our younger college boys show up and start throwing.  One played college hoops at the DIII level or some shit.  very humble guy.

So contestant 1 starts trying longer throws and eventually hits 45 yards.  We ask him when he's going to do one that counts. So he has two attempts that go about 45 yards again. contestant2 disappears... we are LOAO as he eventually returns.  He attempts 3 throws and hits 40 yards.  This is the guy who originally said 80.  College hoops guy walks up and hits 50 yards twice.  He never talked shit, just wanted to see what he could throw.

I originally proposed the Uncle Rico day to shut these guys up from talking like they could chunk the hell outta the football.  Well that premise was a complete and utter failure.  Now they are talking about having a 'mini Olympics' in the Spring so they can 'train(LOFL!!!!!!!!!!!)' for it.

We, the coworkers, have already determined that it will be offsite and there will be tailgating while these 2 boys entertain us with:

100m dash

40m dash

Baseball relay of some sort starting with third to home and working their way out to left field fence.  Showing off their awesome arms again.

pushups

400m race/ one lap around track.

3 other events TBA.

WTF hath we wrought?  LOLz.  Hopefully the EMTs are not too far from the park.

sorry no film of the events today.  Company is pretty firm on that shit, regarding events on site.

Tell them it's going to be like the original Olympics.  

 

 

 

 

  [Stephon Marbury and Kevin Garnett].....  All nude[/Stepon Marbury and Kevin Garnett]

Edited by Macanudo
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LebongJames

LebongJames 1813

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I don’t know how far I can throw a football but at the Ole Miss game in 2013 we snuck beer from the Corral Club back to our seats about 40 rows up. After quite a few terrible plays and being over served I chunked my beer 1/4 full from the stands to the closest hash line. Not a classy thing to do but it is still brought up with my college buddies every game we watch together now. It was a heave.

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Fudge Nuggets

Fudge Nuggets 19223

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Posted (edited)
On 11/15/2018 at 5:35 PM, Onboard 2.0 said:

I seem to remember Bert Jones, Colts QB in the 70's could throw a football the furthest I ever saw.  

My cousin lived just down the road from him when Bert was in his prime.  One time when he was back in Louisiana during the offseason I happened to be visiting my cousin.  Of course we future Pro-Bowlers and all the other kids in the vicinity wanted to see him do his thing at the local HS field.  Memory may be exaggerating, but I'm pretty sure he could hit 75 yards consistently without too much warm up.  I believe he had an 80+ yarder or two in there, but these weren't regulation NFL balls as far as I recall.

I saw a kid from Alamo Heights (can't remember the name and I don't think he even played ball for them) throw a ball 70 yards in intramurals once.  So that was pretty cool... too bad the nearest receiver was only 20 yards downfield at the time.

Edited by Fudge Nuggets
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Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9083

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1 minute ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

My cousin lived just down the road from him when Bert was in his prime.  One time when he was back in Louisiana during the offseason I happened to be visiting my cousin.  Of course we future Pro-Bowlers and all the other kids in the vicinity wanted to see him do his thing at the local HS field.  Memory may be exaggerating, but I'm pretty sure he could hit 75 yards consistently without too much warm up.  I believe he had an 80+ yarder or two in there, but these weren't regulation NFL balls as far as I recall.

I saw a kid from Alamo Heights (can't remember the name and I don't think he even played ball for them) throw a ball 70 yards in intramurals once.  So that was pretty cool... too bad the nearest receiver was only 20 yards downfield at the time.

Yeah, I thought he was on some news show where they were highlighting his ability to throw it an insanely long distance flat footed.

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gsoda3

gsoda3 3282

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UT IM balls were awful. Small and slick. Made it really hard to throw. We always used our own ncaa sized ball. I reffed a game once where Huston street threw one of those IM balls from inside his own end zone to the other side of the opponent's 20 while scrambling to his right. That's > 60 yards.

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, ImissWallyPryor said:

Boxing would be a hoot. 

Oh that was one of our first suggestions, but it would basically be a light heavyweight vs a flyweight type bout.  That, and we have to go to work the following Monday... 

"Hey what happened to your face?"  LOLz.

They also said boxing was a skill, so none of their events is 'skill related."  Everything is basically speed/ endurance, but not requiring better 'ability.'

Their arguing over their levels of physical fitness is what precipitated this little duel...

Edited by slorch
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RPM

RPM 26353

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Farthest throw I've ever seen in person was Brett Favre in a playoff game at Texas Stadium in 94. He chunked a Hail Mary from around his own 30 and it made the endzone. He bent over backward farther than I'd ever seen a QB wind up before. Looked like Stretch freakin' Armstrong. The ball wasn't more than a foot or so off the ground then he put everything he had into it. It was a thing of beauty. Too bad it was incomplete. All I could say was, "whoa".

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Goo Punch

Goo Punch 4275

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the furthest I ever threw a football was 57 yards in high school after injuring my left knee (plant leg). I kept playing pickup football with my friends as an all time qb, and having to make every throw for three months off my back leg got my arm stronger than it had ever been. After I came back threw a ball from the 50 yard line at PHS 7 yards deep into the end zone. It's nowhere close to as far as some of my other friends could throw, but it felt pretty awesome to me.

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Goo Punch

Goo Punch 4275

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oh yeah it was an NCAA ball ^^^^

 

also, biggest arms i've seen/heard about:

Michael Vick

Ell Roberson

Kordell Stewart

Brett Favre

John Elway

Rick McIvor

Joe Flacco

there was that one QB who ended not being any good but they had video of him throwing like 60 yards off a knee. Kyle Boller or someone?

Daunte Culpepper

Randall Cunningham

Allen Iverson

 

my dad said he saw Elway throw a baseball from the warning track to home plate on a frozen rope

 

also The Ocho should air football throwing contests like those long drive contests they do

also MTV should bring back Rock n Jock

 

 

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