Conspiracy theories are for the birds.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

Quote

The CIA assassinated John F. Kennedy after he refused to kill and replace billions of birds with drones. The U.S. government is sequestering a team of Boeing engineers in Area 51 for a secret military mission. Our tax dollars have been funneled into building the “Turkey X500,” a robot used to hunt large birds.

 

I would love to be making this up.

Are Birds Actually Government-Issued Drones? So Says a New Conspiracy Theory Making Waves (and Money)

[Telegraph_it 3358]

Ho lee fuk. 

[futureman 22510]

I think shit like this (and the flat-earth folks, etc) is a product of boredom.  these are bored people who are just trolling and it’s mildly amusing to them because of the shock it delivers to normal people.  I have a hard time accepting that anyone really believes it.  perhaps I’m overestimating humanity, though. 

well after actually reading the article it’s just bored college kids trolling for mild amusement.  I was right!  I am a genius. 

Edited November 18, 2018 by futureman

[WhatTheBuck 28794]

As God is my witness, I thought the Turkey X500 could fly. 

[deadshank 24653]

You’d be paranoid too if the whole world was against you. 

[RPM 26328]

It's all in accordance with the Trilateral Commission's plan.

[RDCanecutter 26458]

If by "Government", you mean pre-Lizard-People Dwarven crafters in the service of the Knights Templars, then sure, birds are "Government" drones.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

I fuuuucking, knnnnew it !!!

[Guest Lobo]

Then I'm can oralthernonlogist.  

[Beau Vine 54319]

I for one welcome our new bird drone overlords.

[HornsOverIthaca 2335]

Birds barbershop has always been questionable.

[OrangEngr 1035]

Fuckin' grackles

[SurlyBDR 22814]

Who's the piece of shit responsible for programming said drones to shit all over my car every time I wash it?

 

I want to take a shit on his windshield now

[Neonmoon 38130]

Birds serve zero purpose. Fuck birds

[Biff Tannen 45695]

1 hour ago, BurntEyes said:

You see.. the lack of respect is at the core of all your issues.

Bow down before the ones you serve or you're going to get what you deserve.

Maybe he'd rather die than give you control.

[WhatTheBuck 28794]

2 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

Birds serve zero purpose. Fuck birds

Sounds like Thanksgiving at the Neonmoon household probably sucks. 

[Yarbr 123]

I plan on taking out 6 duck drones tomorrow morning.

[SurlyBDR 22814]

2 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

You see.. the lack of respect is at the core of all your issues.

Bow down before the ones you serve or you're going to get what you deserve.

I wish I could see your face in the morning when you see that log on your windshield!

[Rimbo 26020]

2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

Maybe he'd rather die than give you control.

God, money... I'd do anything for you.

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4976]

11 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

Birds serve zero purpose. Fuck birds

What do you eat on Tuesday?

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

2 minutes ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

What do you eat on Tuesday?

Is Tuesday bird day like Good Friday is no meat day ?

[El Diablo 4232]

15 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:

If by "Government", you mean pre-Lizard-People Dwarven crafters in the service of the Knights Templars, then sure, birds are "Government" drones.

It's not a coincidence that Ben Franklin, a Mason, wanted the Turkey X500 to be the national bird. 

[Player 4575]

It ain’t cool being no jive turkeyX500 so close to thanksgiving.

[RollLeft 5045]

[Fudge Nuggets 19209]

15 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

I for one welcome our new bird drone overlords.

They are going to start eating us on Tuesdays.

[El Diablo 4232]

3 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

They are going to start eating us on Tuesdays.

If Tuesday is anything like this Monday has been, they can have my ass.

[Pogo 284]

That's not why the CIA killed JFK?  🧐

[Dolemite 143]

 

[DougO 5253]

The drone I ate for dinner yesterday was dry as fuck.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

Needed more 30 weight oil?

[Guest Lobo]

He’s a menace to everything in the sky.

yes, birds too.  

[ulukinatme 1764]

On 11/19/2018 at 10:11 AM, Fudge Nuggets said:

They are going to start eating us on Tuesdays.

Not before I've had my snow coffee

 

[Reagan1k 3024]

All this time I thought the metal I find in ducks, geese, and dove was shot......This explains everything.

[ADHD 28]

The CIA put a microchip in my rooster.

[workswithseed 2108]

On 12/5/2018 at 12:25 AM, ADHD said:

The CIA put a microchip in my rooster.

They just wanted to grab your cock.