Texas vs. OU Sat 12/1 @11:00 AM

[Huckleberry 32710]

6 minutes ago, Constant said:

Scathing. Flies in the face of most of the sentiment on this board around this game, but scathing nonetheless. 

What a witty retort. I'm going to have to assume that you chose a profession where people who score too high on intelligence tests have their applications rejected for being too smart, amirite?

[Eggo 3976]

12 minutes ago, Constant said:

Scathing. Flies in the face of most of the sentiment on this board around this game, but scathing nonetheless. 

So Oklahoma fans aren't putting importance around this game?

[phdhorn 6224]

16 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Wait so let me get this straight - our biggest legend is the head coach that won 3 titles, but your biggest legend is the head coach that never won a title with upper-classmen that he recruited? Not YOUR head coach that won 3 and went back to back? That sounds pretty embarrassing and like you're the one shifting gears. 

Show me where I defined "winningest" as regular season wins, please

Their greatest legend was Bud Wilkinson.  Awesome coach and great man (stories of his selflessness are too numerous to list).  He was truly their best legend ever.

After him, the entire program, university, and state went to shit.  As in liquid diarrhea.

I wake up every day in Texas, and not Oklahoma.  If nothing else, that is why life is worth it.

[BERT 4351]

14 minutes ago, phdhorn said:

Their greatest legend was Bud Wilkinson.  Awesome coach and great man (stories of his selflessness are too numerous to list).  He was truly their best legend ever.

After him, the entire program, university, and state went to shit.  As in liquid diarrhea.

I wake up every day in Texas, and not Oklahoma.  If nothing else, that is why life is worth it.

is there another kind?

Edited November 30, 2018 by BERT
why in the fuck did it make "liquid" smaller???

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

Constables are the ones that couldn’t become real cops. What a shame.

[ztejas 43292]

33 minutes ago, Constant said:

I don’t even know what the hell you’re talking about any more. I assumed by “winningest” you meant “most wins”. I see now thats not how your brain works. 

I know. It's tough to follow. I guess you were hungover at most of your Philosophy 101 classes. Or maybe just too dumb to understand words with more than 5 letters in them. 

"winningest" is an informal term, and one that google has my back on: having achieved the most success in competition.

So have a nice day and as always OU sucks.

 

[Hagbard Celine 10772]

The Admiral's TrapMetrics (TM) Forecast

1. The surface.  These teams have never played each other on a fast track.  The Cotton Bowl carpet sponge is just a different surface.  That more than anything is the biggest delta between Fair Park and the Deathstar.  I have no idea how it plays out but my guess it helps the D's neutralize the opposing O's.  Therefore, I'm predicting a much lower score than everyone else expects, something like 5 scores to 3.

2. The mixed seating.  Yeah, there are "sides".  But the momentum polarity will not be there.  Just like aggy, the burglars have a single riff they play over and over and over, and that's going to get lost in the cacophony of white noise.  In fact, the bands can't both be miked, how would you mix that through the sound system?  What's the upshot of mixed seating?  We have a secret weapon that the burlgars do not.  TEXAS.  FIGHT.   We can deploy and use that weapon in this environment.  The burglars do not have anything similar.

3. The Ewok.  Play man, spy him with our fastest DB, and bring the house.  Every.  Fucking.  Play.  All.  Day.  Long.  Dare them to run the Ewok.  He scores when he breaks contain.  He also fucks up when you get to him early.

4. There's a 100% chance that 0u sucks.

[ztejas 43292]

4 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

Barry Switzer is, and always will be, the defining coach for the modern OU football program.  He turned them into a full on black hat wearing outlaw program that will (a) accept any reprobate as long as it gets them wins, and (b) embrace and actually revel in how they cut corners to win.  

It actually makes for a great rival.  They’re completely abhorrent in every way, but they’re open and proud of it.  So, you get to feel like you have the high ground, and they aren’t annoying and hypocritical like aggy trying to tell us how really they’re the good guys.  They just own being the college football equivalent of wrestling villains.

Thank you.

[staboner 4959]

ya'll motherfuckers going crazy on this page

i like funny dick drawings 

 

[phdhorn 6224]

12 minutes ago, BERT said:

is there another kind?

Yes, there is the applesaucy kind.  You know, like sloppy joe meat in a lot of sauce.  That's bad, but not the putrid, illness-stinking-worst-level-somewhere-between-Tomato-soup-and-chicken-broth-density liquid diarrhea.  Oklahoma is the kind of liquid shit you have after a combination of the flu, shitty Keystone Light beer, Cheetos, hot sauce, and 3 Twinkies.  So the answer is of course...

[crimsonlonghorn 2306]

2 hours ago, Constant said:

I’m glad y’all are already setting the table with excuses. Whats shaggy/surly without a little referee blaming and conference conspiracy worries 24hrs prior to kickoff? Sound like that school in College Station. 

Whatchoo talking about Okie?

[crimsonlonghorn 2306]

53 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

What a witty retort. I'm going to have to assume that you chose a profession where people who score too high on intelligence tests have their applications rejected for being too smart, amirite?

[totallynotabuttpirate 5348]

26 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Constables are the ones that couldn’t become real cops. What a shame.

Aren't they elected in most places? I would think running a campaign and getting elected is a bigger challange then becoming a cop. 

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

Aren't they elected in most places? I would think running a campaign and getting elected is a bigger challange then becoming a cop. 

You think he is an elected constable? Hahaha. Man, this okie bitch is a deputy. Doing traffic duty outside the courthouse.

[texifornia 56572]

 

[Longhorn Fever 267]

58 minutes ago, Hagbard Celine said:

The Admiral's TrapMetrics (TM) Forecast

1. The surface.  These teams have never played each other on a fast track.  The Cotton Bowl carpet sponge is just a different surface.  That more than anything is the biggest delta between Fair Park and the Deathstar.  I have no idea how it plays out but my guess it helps the D's neutralize the opposing O's.  Therefore, I'm predicting a much lower score than everyone else expects, something like 5 scores to 3.

2. The mixed seating.  Yeah, there are "sides".  But the momentum polarity will not be there.  Just like aggy, the burglars have a single riff they play over and over and over, and that's going to get lost in the cacophony of white noise.  In fact, the bands can't both be miked, how would you mix that through the sound system?  What's the upshot of mixed seating?  We have a secret weapon that the burlgars do not.  TEXAS.  FIGHT.   We can deploy and use that weapon in this environment.  The burglars do not have anything similar.

3. The Ewok.  Play man, spy him with our fastest DB, and bring the house.  Every.  Fucking.  Play.  All.  Day.  Long.  Dare them to run the Ewok.  He scores when he breaks contain.  He also fucks up when you get to him early.

4. There's a 100% chance that 0u sucks.

I am with you for the most part. I guess I am wondering if I need to bring out the old Animal House "On a roll" quote about your conclusion on number 2.

I have been to a lot of Texas-OU games. The OSoners have that Boomer Sooner cheer, no doubt burgled from us, that they do like Texas Fight. Crap, that idoit Billy Sims does it at the Heisman ceremony every time there is an OSoner nominated.

Maybe you have a point about the mixed seating. Perhaps they won't have enough intelligence to get it coordinated from all points in the stadium. Hmm...

What time is it again?

Edited November 30, 2018 by Longhorn Fever
Forgot to ask the time.

[ztejas 43292]

1 hour ago, Hagbard Celine said:

Therefore, I'm predicting a much lower score than everyone else expects, something like 5 scores to 3.

Hop on board, Admiral. 31-14 in the game prediction thread and I'm sticking with it. 

Now - I'm factoring Kyler Murray exploding into 100 pieces sometime during the 2nd quarter into that equation. Not sure if you adjusted for that or not before navigating. 

[Constant 6722]

56 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

 

You think he is an elected constable? Hahaha. Man, this okie bitch is a deputy. Doing traffic duty outside the courthouse.

 

Absolutely right. 

[Sejjr 3246]

[HOOK'EMHOOAH 1606]

2 hours ago, closetojumping said:

Meh. Without paying players to attend the embarrassing shithole you call a state and school, OU has never won a national title. Not once has your program won a title in which it didn't have sanctions immediately follow in the aftermath. Kind of the same, but different, I guess. 

Objectively speaking, there would be 2 championships that did not have any incursions from the NCAA stepping in for major violations in 1950 and 2000. Thats a 50 year span between legitimate, uncontested titles. The above image outlines pretty much what you said though. Never the less, FIVE national titles that really can't be claimed because of the way the school and coaches do business is squarely on them. It cant be repeated enough times that oklahoma can't produce without cheating.

Now, @Constant would you care to try again and fucking own these facts? I'm willing to bet you won't because you don't live in reality and couldn't stand to bear that the objective facts are not on your side.

[6th Street 6358]

BJ Foster needs to be assigned to Murray on every play

[Anastasis 23403]

Lets do this.

 

 

[ztejas 43292]

22 minutes ago, HOOK'EMHOOAH said:

Objectively speaking, there would be 2 championships that did not have any incursions from the NCAA stepping in for major violations in 1950 and 2000. Thats a 50 year span between legitimate, uncontested titles. The above image outlines pretty much what you said though. Never the less, FIVE national titles that really can't be claimed because of the way the school and coaches do business is squarely on them. It cant be repeated enough times that oklahoma can't produce without cheating.

Now, @Constant would you care to try again and fucking own these facts? I'm willing to bet you won't because you don't live in reality and couldn't stand to bear that the objective facts are not on your side.

This is petty (but hilarious). Texas had a major violation in 1965 - should we not count the two titles closely preceding that? Do you count your losses to SMU in the 80s? (when everyone in the conference was cheating)*

I know I'm standing on an unfriendly hill here but let's not go full-send aggy.

Edited November 30, 2018 by ztejas
Fuck aggy

[Dnaguy 11780]

9 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

Lets do this.

 

 

 

[ztejas 43292]

25 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

BJ Foster needs to be assigned to Murray on every play

.

Edited November 30, 2018 by ztejas
I'm a pussy

[HOOK'EMHOOAH 1606]

6 minutes ago, ztejas said:

This is petty (but hilarious). Texas had a major violation in 1965 - should we not count the two titles closely preceding that? Do you count your losses to SMU in the 80s? (when everyone in the conference was cheating)*

I know I'm standing on an unfriendly hill here but let's not go full-send aggy.

If major violations occured, then they negate whatever happened on the field. As far as specific losses to specific teams go during the season, yeah they still count; the game was played and whatever the result of the game was is recorded. They just won't count as victories for the teams that were cheating. This is why when the NCAA hands down punitive action they make a declaration that the institution must vacate wins, but not losses.

So the best practice is to just not do things that are violations and this wont happen. Essentially,  "don't start no shit, won't be no shit."

[BarStella 13]

34 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

BJ Foster needs to be assigned to Murray on every play

BJ Foster needs to be assigned to him on one* play and target that gnome fuck into the ground. He can have a G2 and vodka and watch the W from the locker room. 

[ztejas 43292]

9 minutes ago, HOOK'EMHOOAH said:

If major violations occured, then they negate whatever happened on the field. As far as specific losses to specific teams go during the season, yeah they still count; the game was played and whatever the result of the game was is recorded. They just won't count as victories for the teams that were cheating. This is why when the NCAA hands down punitive action they make a declaration that the institution must vacate wins, but not losses.

So the best practice is to just not do things that are violations and this wont happen. Essentially,  "don't start no shit, won't be no shit."

Every major program worth a shit cheats. What it comes down to are 3 factors:

1. How egregious are you (OU - very egregious. Texas - pretty egregious but more sound morally)

2. How good are you at not getting caught (OU - decent to poor at not getting caught. Texas - pretty damn good at not getting caught)

3. How much does the NCAA want to fuck you (OU - not a high priority target for the NCAA. Too much $$$. Texas - NCAA would rather take a sharp stick to the eye)

If you cover the bases on #s 1 and 3 then #2 doesn't matter. See: every major SMU violation since the death penalty. If #3 is "they don't" then #1 doesn't matter and #2 rarely does. See: the SEC. 

I'll call this my 1-2-3 rule and I'm sure someone has made a similar observation somewhere along the line. 

Bama is a fun one to do:

1. Hilariously egregious

2. VERY good (there's a reason Saban has a fistful of title rings) - and in the middle of nowhere

3. Lol 

USC:

1. Pretty shady but not the worst

2. Alright - tough to get away with stuff in the middle of LA.

3. Only if they absolutely have to, i.e. it winds up as a national story.

[ztejas 43292]

Btw this is a super fun site to play around on. You can start with the blue bloods of cheating and go from there. Listed by total # under "Institutions" https://web3.ncaa.org/lsdbi/search?types=major&q=

For example, this one is absolute horseshit and never would happen if SMU wasn't the nation leader in rule #3 (or was better at #2 - which we fucking suck at): https://web3.ncaa.org/lsdbi/search/miCaseView?id=709

Edited November 30, 2018 by ztejas

[ztejas 43292]

Anyway,

 

OU Sucks

[HenryJames 65915]

38 minutes ago, ztejas said:

This is petty (but hilarious). Texas had a major violation in 1965 - should we not count the two titles closely preceding that?

1. The University followed the practice of placing visiting prospective student-athletes in off-campus, commercial housing and providing them with cash per diem meal allowances. Several prospects charged meals at the motel in which they were housed, were provided free meals by hosts serving for the University and consequently, were not called upon to use the money provided by the university for meals.
2. In two instances the university paid the costs of room and several meals for friends who accompanied prospective student-athletes on their trips to visit the institution's campus.
3. In one instance a prospective student-athlete was transported from his home to Austin and return in a company-owned aircraft. No one except the company's pilot accompanied the young man on this trip.

’Major.’

[tantric superman 4667]

This is gotta be one of the weirdest pre-game threads in the history of this board and its successor, I would think.

I've got a grin a mile wide and I feel like I have a buzz even though I have yet to drink today because we have gone from losing to Maryland to playing in the championship game.  We're flawed as heck but fun to watch.

Plus, we're underdogs which makes it that much more fun.

Longhorn bunny says chill.

[ShowmeyourTDs 1140]

3 hours ago, Constant said:

Bob Stoops went to Iowa. 

That totally explains the his love of dicks.

https://www.intomore.com/culture/three-out-of-four-americans-have-dildos/da3667b2959c4614

[ztejas 43292]

1 minute ago, HenryJames said:

1. The University followed the practice of placing visiting prospective student-athletes in off-campus, commercial housing and providing them with cash per diem meal allowances. Several prospects charged meals at the motel in which they were housed, were provided free meals by hosts serving for the University and consequently, were not called upon to use the money provided by the university for meals.
2. In two instances the university paid the costs of room and several meals for friends who accompanied prospective student-athletes on their trips to visit the institution's campus.
3. In one instance a prospective student-athlete was transported from his home to Austin and return in a company-owned aircraft. No one except the company's pilot accompanied the young man on this trip.

’Major.’

Right. The distinction of what constitutes "major" is silly. See the SMU example I cited. Impermissible text messages to parents? What the fuck does that even mean? 

If it's something that isn't morally wrong (like UT's 1965 slap on the wrist - guessing a couple of those early OU ones were similar), then who gives a shit. Fuck the NCAA. If it's something that is harming the well-being of everyone involved with the program (OU's lack of control in the 1980s) OR if it's so stupidly egregious that you were bound to get fucked at some-point (SWC recruiting in the 1980s. I mean Jesus) then take your penalty and sit down. 

[Levi 2576]

I’m tired of seeing that there is no way Texas beats them 2 times(not saying on this site but everywhere else). If people can’t see after watching the first game that Texas played well and how it was not a fluke, then they are dumb. 

Turnovers are a part of the game and Ou had more and Texas took advantage of it. That’s usually how a team wins, especially in the big12. Will it be harder to beat them 2 times? Hell yeah it will be but Texas will do it because they’re a damn good football team that played well. 

[ztejas 43292]

2 minutes ago, tantric superman said:

This is gotta be one of the weirdest pre-game threads in the history of this board and its successor, I would think.

I think you meant predecessor but to be fair there really isn't precedent for having to beat OU's ass twice in one season. I blame Jerryworld. And myself. 

[sidis 9772]

ou sucks.

fuck those piece of shit cocksuckers.

[Johnny Sack 8397]

8 hours ago, closetojumping said:

I second this question, seriously. I haven't scouted out the scuttlebutt on their boards regarding injury and haven't read much in the media publications. I believe their top 3 safeties are out and that they're starting two freshmen, but outside of that I know very little.

Calcaterra is back to full strength, right?

I know we can expect multiple drama queens on the DL to go down to injury, have to helped off the field and force a referee timeout, and then miraculously come back in two series later. Gallimore is almost a guarantee for this, and the #72 seems to really enjoy doing it as well. This is known in my world as the Antwan Kirk-Hughes maneuver, and these pussies do it about as well as the original master.

Doug Smith for the Oilers used to do that every fourth play or so in the 80s.  He wasn’t trying to slow down the offense.  He wasn’t just fat and needed a breather. 

[ztejas 43292]

1 minute ago, Johnny Sack said:

Doug Smith for the Oilers used to do that every fourth play or so in the 80s.  He wasn’t trying to slow down the offense.  He wasn’t just fat and needed a breather. 

Earl Campbell used to do it multiple times a game. But that was after rattling off 50 yard touchdown runs so they didn't need him out there anyway.

[Johnny Sack 8397]

4 hours ago, Constant said:

Without Royal you have one national championship and an unnamed stadium. But whatever, it’s irrelevant. 

Without cheating you have zero.  

[HOOK'EMHOOAH 1606]

I'm not an apologist by any stretch of the imagination. So each school's violations stand for themselves and Texas' are no different. They were violations at the time of occurence regardless of whatever standard might've changed since they happened, meaning minor infractions are still infractions. What happened in the 60's is wholesale entirely different than what happened in the 80's. But it doesn't take away from the fact that a better way of managing the methods to ensure money wasnt passed on to recruits could've and should've been done more appropriately. Such as not letting anyone keep whatever was left from the per diem and requiring a receipt turned in with the returned money following the meal (provided meals were allowed to be covered for recruits on official visits, I'm not sure as to what the specific rule was regarding that at the time per the NCAA). I have no problem looking back at past events and recognizing the issue or problem for what it was objectively, even when it comes to something I hold in high regard. Actually, most especially when it comes to things I hold in high regard. I can do this because I know the things I hold in high regard will stand up to scrutiny and prevail.

[Johnny Sack 8397]

1 hour ago, 6th Street said:

BJ Foster needs to be assigned to Murray on every play

BJ Foster needs to knock the fuck out of that midget and make him quit.  

[BarStella 13]

1 minute ago, Johnny Sack said:

BJ Foster needs to knock the fuck out of that midget and make him quit.  

Tell BJ there's a BJ waiting for him if he makes Kylie bleed from her VJ.

[BarStella 13]

You know all that "baking" Sally did? There was a bit more than flour and eggs going into that mixing bowl. 

[Dilligas 666]

5 hours ago, Constant said:

I’m glad y’all are already setting the table with excuses. Whats shaggy/surly without a little referee blaming and conference conspiracy worries 24hrs prior to kickoff? Sound like that school in College Station. 

Yeah sorry, but I’ve got to agree with this fine upstanding Sooner. Don’t need to be making excuses for kicking that sooner ass tomorrow.

Appreciate your service Constant.

But OU Sucks

[closetojumping 62263]

1 hour ago, HOOK'EMHOOAH said:

Objectively speaking, there would be 2 championships that did not have any incursions from the NCAA stepping in for major violations in 1950 and 2000. Thats a 50 year span between legitimate, uncontested titles. The above image outlines pretty much what you said though. Never the less, FIVE national titles that really can't be claimed because of the way the school and coaches do business is squarely on them. It cant be repeated enough times that oklahoma can't produce without cheating.

Now, @Constant would you care to try again and fucking own these facts? I'm willing to bet you won't because you don't live in reality and couldn't stand to bear that the objective facts are not on your side.

I am pretty sure the 2000 title was followed by the Big Red Sports scandal which ultimately had a penalty with it from the NCAA, even as dickless as they'd become. We can sit here and say "well, that was Bomar and Peterson, not the 2000 crew" and I'd say, "right, it was just that one time and not an institutional standard of ongoing behavior that had its whistleblown". Also, the violations in 1956 were suspected to have gone backwards since the end of WWII, and they were penalized according to that logic if memory serves. The way OU leveraged dirty money and the GI fund to their advantage in the late 40's into the 50's is a well-established and examined circumstance, contributing in a very large way to Bud Wilkinson's historic winning streak.

[Irish Wrist Watch 1349]

I wouldn't be surprised to see an illegal/late hit on each QB mañana.

[ztejas 43292]

9 minutes ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

I wouldn't be surprised to see an illegal/late hit on each QB mañana.

For OU it would be more of a late "tap"

[Blanton 170]

17 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I am pretty sure the 2000 title was followed by the Big Red Sports scandal which ultimately had a penalty with it from the NCAA, even as dickless as they'd become. We can sit here and say "well, that was Bomar and Peterson, not the 2000 crew" and I'd say, "right, it was just that one time and not an institutional standard of ongoing behavior that had its whistleblown". Also, the violations in 1956 were suspected to have gone backwards since the end of WWII, and they were penalized according to that logic if memory serves. The way OU leveraged dirty money and the GI fund to their advantage in the late 40's into the 50's is a well-established and examined circumstance, contributing in a very large way to Bud Wilkinson's historic winning streak.

Fuck ‘em. 

This is how you measure champions in college football. 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/MacArthur_Bowl

[GotThatFire 166]

 I had a dream last night that Sam got injured and then so did Shane. Then Rising came into the game and we still won that shit 

 Maybe it was part dream part nightmare. I don’t know but it definitely confirmed that indeed, ou sucks.