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Santa isn't real

Wally Fairway

By Wally Fairway
in Daily Texan

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LongestHorn

LongestHorn 759

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3 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Good one ^^^.  We used to put the kids to bed, and then go up on our one story roof above their bedroom, and ring bells, and stomp around a bit.  You could hear screams thru the roof that would cause hearing impairment.

I threw mule deer shit on the roof of our house Christmas Eve in Boulder 2005.  By Christmas afternoon, the news broke and kids were streaming down the sidewalk to see the reindeer shit.  Totally worth it.  Would not do it again.

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Wally Fairway

Wally Fairway 5,571

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14 minutes ago, cabowabo said:

Santa Claus is as real as Jesus and God.

What in the fuck are you talking about - ain't nobody started a war because of Santa Claus; nor does Santa run a real estate and Ponzi scam to solicit donations in exchange for a happy afterlife. Get your crazy talk outta this happy Christmas thread.

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Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9,083

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Just now, Wally Fairway said:

What in the fuck are you talking about - ain't nobody started a war because of Santa Claus; nor does Santa run a real estate and Ponzi scam to solicit donations in exchange for a happy afterlife. Get your crazy talk outta this happy Christmas thread.

Hey doesn't however seem to exploit "little people" in his toy sweat shop. So there's that I guess.

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Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21,865

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Yes until around age 5, then you make up the Santa's helper bit.  Agree on the others.  Tooth Fairy is very strange, seems like the tooth turning into money would be a better bit.  We don't really do anything with the bunny in our house.  My wife is catholic so kids get the religious version of Easter over the bunny version.  They still do an egg hunt though but there is no lore behind it. 


And rich kids' teeth are worth more than poors' teeth.
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NotActuallyALonghorn

NotActuallyALonghorn 4,976

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19 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Well he is a Western European invention after St. Nicholas I believe.  Not sure why in the fuck there has to be a discussion about his skin color though.  If he's black, brown, yellow or white, so be it.

Maybe there should be a draft like Chapelle did on his show, the white people get Santa, the brown/black folks get Jesus... seems fair... 

Well if he was black, he wouldn't last long. A strange black man sneaking around in folks' houses is gonna get shot pretty quick in some parts of the country.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28,794

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Holy Shit. I remember when Santa showed up at my house when I was five. I knew it was somebody in a Santa suit, I never knew who. I think it was my uncle. I sat on the laps of a few Santas in shopping malls when I was a kid. I knew they weren't Santa either. I was making out a gift list for my parents. I knew who was buying them. I knew Santa wasn't real before I was ever told. That happened probably when I was six.

Eleven or twelve? Man, I'd be concerned. 

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Texas_Rocks

Texas_Rocks 346

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people forget what it's like to be kids. or some people are just miserable cunts.
you know that you can celebrate the pagan festivities of christmas and still teach them the meaning of christmas.  crazy idea, i know. 
you mean allow them to be kids and enjoy the happiest days of the year for kids AND get to teach them what the true meaning is from a religious stand point?  no wai!  get out of here with that reasonable idea!!


It’s sad that there are adults out there that want to take that joy away from children because of their own miserable lives.
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Richard Kimball

Richard Kimball 1,496

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Many moons ago, in the early eighties, I played Santa Claus at Highland Mall. 

A couple of kids came up. They were wearing T-shirts with the name of their church on it. I said, "My memory isn't as good as it used to be, but do you still live in Pflugerville?" 

They both turned around and said, "Mom! It's HIM! It's really him!" 

Two UT linemen got their picture taken sitting on my lap. I think they did it on a dare, but those guys were big. One on each knee, my head was at armpit level. 

Fun times. 

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Okie State

Okie State 3,821

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I've always found it really bizarre when adults want to ruin it for kids. You literally have the entire rest of your life to see the world for how it really is.

I loved Christmas as a kid mostly due to my Grandma and the unique traditions at her house for Christmas Eve. It's even better now that I have my own kids. Their innocence and pure joy is really something to experience.

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mdmost

mdmost 43,011

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I think we're at the point with our oldest (just turned 11) that she might still believe because she thinks it will hurt our feelings if she doesn't. She talks about the other kids her age who don't believe but seems to brush it off. She's never directly asked so we feel no need to unleash to her that the world is less magical than she thinks it is.

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Modessit

Modessit 5,603

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When I was getting to the age of disbelief, my mom and dad would still tell me he was real. I'd search the house for the gifts. We lived in a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, Iowa. We left to go to midnight mass and when we came back we found Santa had come while we were gone. My mom still won't tell me how they did it and just says, "It was Santa."

I used to watch out the window while it was snowing to see if I could see Santa arrive. There was a radio tower about a mile away with a red light blinking on top and I'd think it was Rudolph.

My kids - 5 and 2 - are absolutely in love with Santa although the youngest is too scared to sit on his lap.

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Bama Chick

Bama Chick 28,596

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Santa still brings presents even though my kids are 16 and 20.

They still say “Thanks Santa!” but I then get a hug and a kiss on the cheek to let me know they appreciate who really did all the work.

We used to do the cookies and milk thing. We also used to sprinkle “Reindeer Food” (dry oatmeal mixed with red and green glitter) in the yard. Then after the kids were asleep we’d take the dog to leave “reindeer prints” and my husband would walk in it with his hunting boots on for Santa prints. They used to loose their minds finding “evidence” in the tracks left in the reindeer food.

But I must admit I freaking jumped for joy once they stopped believing because that meant I was fucking DONE with that stupid ass Elf On The Shelf.

God, it was such a pain in the ass to move that creepy fucker around every night. And heaven forbid I forgot - then the kids got all freaked out they made the elf mad and I’d have to bullshit some excuse about why he didn’t move.

Those bitches that invented that mess got rich but I still curse them for adding more stress to an already busy and stressful time for parents of little kids.

I still hate that creepy little fucker.

Good riddance, Cornelius.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28,794

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1 hour ago, skeeter said:

05_gahanwilson_christmas.jpg

csb...

I've only been to a Playboy Club once. I was 18 and it was to see Gahan Wilson speak. It was pretty cool. I went with my older brother. It probably would've been more fun if I was old enough to drink. We stayed for his lecture and left.

He's a funny, twisted dude. I've always been a fan of his work. 

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Bama Chick

Bama Chick 28,596

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How in the fuck does a dog print look anything like a deer track? Lol


lol Toddlers don’t know anything about animal tacks. Plus, it was in dry oatmeal and glitter - it wasn’t exactly a plaster cast. Anything that looked vaguely like an animal print worked.

By the time the boy started hunting and knew the difference he didn’t believe in Santa any longer.

It was fun and I love the memories of all those Christmases from when the kids were little but I’m sure glad I’m done with that.

It’ll be nice to watch them have to do all that when they have kids. And grandma gets to kick back with some milk punch and give unwanted advice.
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Macanudo

Macanudo 12,999

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13 hours ago, Bama Chick said:

God, it was such a pain in the ass to move that creepy fucker around every night. And heaven forbid I forgot - then the kids got all freaked out they made the elf mad and I’d have to bullshit some excuse about why he didn’t move.

Mine pretty much just spend the entire time at/near the wine rack/liquor cabinet.   I explained to my kids when they were pretty young what a bender was and why Pablo and Dante spend most of the time there among the bottles.    Elfing ain't easy.

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BillyGoatHill

BillyGoatHill 4,312

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My daughter grew up with the ex, but we split the holidays and summers with her throughout the years....not sure if it was during one of her Christmas breaks or during the summer months, but when she was around 5, I saw her looking through some photo albums and she asked where a picture of me was taken. (I had met her mom while I was in the Air Force and I had gone on two missions to the polar ice cap above Greenland in '85 and '86. The first year was above 89 degrees and just south of the actual "pole").

Without giving her question much thought, I told her, "that is when your dad was in the military and that is at the North Pole".....All she heard was North Pole and immediately blurted out, "North Pole?,... Did you see Santa?" Of course I lied and told her yes and that I been to his house. It worked great to keep her in line while she was younger, but the lie eventually spread to her younger cousins as she told them about her dad and the time he had dinner with Santa at his house.

They are all college age or older now, young adults who occasionally give me grief about the story of their Uncle and Santa. A story which they used to tell their friends as proof when their friends would say "Santa isn't real!!"

They tell me now that it wasn't right telling them that, but I always use the line that others have stated on this thread,........Those that do not believe, do not receive.

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Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9,083

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Yeah, no it's not. Not if you have any kind of social skill set that would allow you to move freely among the normal people of the world. It's fucked up, and while I can and do laugh at it's sick humor, its not something I'd put out there for kids to see.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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All this bullshit is why I'm raising my daughters as Jehova's Witness.  When they get old enough to start asking about the existence of Santa Claus, I can merely point to the teachings of Charles Russell and remind them that not only is Santa Claus not real, but all holidays are lies perpetrated by sinners and Christmas is nothing more than an illusion churning along on commerce-dependent inertia.  So as to not feel alienated by their peers at school, in early January before the spring semester begins, they will receive a commemorative PBS tote bag containing new socks and multi-vitamins.

 

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SubliminalHorn

SubliminalHorn 6,809

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On 12/6/2018 at 12:52 PM, Longhorn94 said:

Like others on this thread, our approach has been simple. If you believe in Santa, he is real. If you do not believe, the magic of christmas no longer exists. and NO ONE wants that. I repeat, NO ONE wants the magic of Christmas to stop. My jr in college at UT still believes in the magic of Christmas and still gets excited when he hears Santa's sleigh bells ring right after I finish reading the Night Before Christmas. Santa has impeccable timing. He along with our 4 other children all run to their beds and cover up their heads and go to sleep when they hear those bells... 

 

As for why people want their kids to be grateful to Santa instead, its not about credit or gratefulness. Its about believing in the greater good and that if you are a good person then good things will come your way. Its about encouraging believe in innocence and doing the right thing and not worrying about who gets credit for it. Trust me when Santa is putting together a basketball goal AND a trampoline on Christmas Eve and doesnt get a wink of sleep before the kids wake up, he doesnt give a damn who gets credit. He just wants to see those smiles on his kids faces.

Your son who is a junior at UT still gets excited about Santa and runs upstairs, covers his head, and goes to sleep? Really?

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