Santa isn't real

[Guest Lobo]

1 hour ago, Wally Fairway said:

Anal???

Yeah, that checks out.  

[workswithseed 2,139]

If Santa isn't this guy, I don't think could ever believe in Santa.

[phdhorn 6,224]

22 hours ago, Lobo said:

I do know some people with kids that are like 19 and then also a 5 year old.  And I wonder what the hell those people did during the interim years?  

Played in the NBA.

[Wally Fairway 5,600]

3 hours ago, workswithseed said:

If Santa isn't this guy, I don't think could ever believe in Santa.

yeah - when Santa has to run you down on his motorcycle, that guy definitely is not going on the nice list

[ztejas 43,741]

I was told as a child,

"Listen, you might want to pack a few of your things together before going to bed. The former bishop of Turkey will be coming tonight along with six to eight black men. They might stuff you into a sack and take you to Spain, or they might just pretend to kick you. We don’t know for sure, but we want you to be prepared."

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

2 hours ago, ztejas said:

I was told as a child,

"Listen, you might want to pack a few of your things together before going to bed. The former bishop of Turkey will be coming tonight along with six to eight black men. They might stuff you into a sack and take you to Spain, or they might just pretend to kick you. We don’t know for sure, but we want you to be prepared."

You have some straight up shitty childhood memories 

[ztejas 43,741]

1 hour ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

You have some straight up shitty childhood memories 

David Sedaris. Worth the listen if you haven't yet. 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

2 minutes ago, ztejas said:

David Sedaris. Worth the listen if you haven't yet. 

Some of his stuff, but not had the pleasure of that little nightmare.

[ztejas 43,741]

1 minute ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Some of his stuff, but not had the pleasure of that little nightmare.

Oh. Dude. Give it a listen. 

 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

Yeah good stuff. The wife loves his work

[BlueGreySky 1,032]

his christmas story about working as an elf in a department store is also pretty good...

 

[Beau Vine 54,843]

 

[LongestHorn 759]

If there's no Santa, then who is being tracked East of Bamako, West Africa?

https://santatracker.google.com/tracker.html

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Oh Florida
https://wsvn.com/news/local/florida-man-screams-santa-isnt-real-to-kids-during-holiday-festival/
 

CAPE CORAL, Fla. (WSVN) — A holiday event meant to fill families with excitement had the opposite effect after it was crashed by a man with a message for the children in the audience.
According to WBBH, Cape Coral’s Festival of Lights was crashed by a man holding a giant sign as he yelled at children and families, telling them Santa isn’t real and that parents were lying to their children.
Video of the incident was captured by one woman who said the man yelled for hours at the event.
“There’s no Santa Claus!” the man is heard yelling in the clip. “They’re all lies!”
One mother said some children left the event in tears.
According to WBBH, police were at the event, but they said they couldn’t do anything because the man was exercising free speech.
They added that the only way they could intervene is if the man used a voice enhancer, such as a megaphone, or if he created a riot.

Phlegm???
Naw, I'd yell

HAKKUNAKAH HARRY IS NOT REAL!

It was Bill Nelson.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Greatest courtroom scene evah.

[Anastasis 23,498]

On 12/19/2018 at 9:03 AM, Lobo said:

I do know some people with kids that are like 19 and then also a 5 year old.  And I wonder what the hell those people did during the interim years?  

In the butt, Bob. 

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

I do know some people with kids that are like 19 and then also a 5 year old.  And I wonder what the hell those people did during the interim years?  

Pooper

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Santa most assuredly IS REAL. I have talked to him. He goes to WDW every January. He usually wears a Santa themed Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and flip flops. We cast address him as Santa.

If you are 13 or older you are not allowed into the parks in a costume but Santa is always in costume and is allowed in which means he is not in a Santa costume but is in his own clothes, Santa clothes.

Santa LIVES!


FUCK THE HATERS and as always OU sucks.

[Planet Houston 4,943]

On 12/6/2018 at 9:16 AM, DixonHur said:

What an idiot.  If Santa doesn't exist, then who the hell has been eating my cookies on Christmas Eve for the past 47 years? 

This hits close to home, as I am currently eating Santa’s cookies (and feeling every bit as round as his fat ass). 

Merry Christmas, assholes.