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Blotto

Blotto 23560

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https://gizmodo.com/tiktok-star-who-sells-her-farts-in-jars-starts-selling-1848305521

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A reality TV star who sells her farts in jars has decided to stop selling them, despite making $1,000 per jar. But fans of her work shouldn’t worry too much. She’s still going to sell her farts as non-fungible tokens, more commonly known as NFTs.

Stephanie Matto, who appeared on the reality TV show “90-Day Fiance” and gained a huge following on TikTok, says she had to go to the hospital recently with gastric complications because she was eating so many high-fiber foods to produce more and more farts.

“I thought I was having a stroke and that these were my final moments,” Matto told the UK’s Jam Press about her unexpected trip to the hospital near her home in Connecticut. “I was overdoing it.”

Matto, who refers to herself as a fartrepreneur, started farting in jars and selling them online in November and documented the foods she was eating on TikTok to keep up her flatulence, like beans, protein muffins, and eggs. Matto was reportedly taking in roughly $50,000 per week through her highly profitable endeavor but it wasn’t long before the strain became too much.

“I didn’t tell my doctors about the farting in the jar but I did tell them about my diet. It was made clear that what I was experiencing wasn’t a stroke or heart attack but very intense gas pains,” Matto told Jam Press.

“I was advised to change my diet and to take a gas suppressant medication, which has effectively ended my business,” Matto continued.

But while Matto has semi-retired from the real-world fart jar business, she’s still pursuing the world of NFTs, where she sells cartoon images of her fart jars. Non-fungible tokens are most often associated with jpeg images, but they’re essentially a decentralized receipt on the blockchain that can be any kind of hyperlink.

Matto has launched a website selling 5,000 fart jar NFTs for .05 ether, which at the current exchange rate works out to about $191, not including ethereum’s notoriously high gas fees. In this case, ether’s gas fees, which are just transaction fees for the blockchain, are rather appropriately named.

Randy Taylor. 

Idk where you people come from. Idk if you test your products... Your quality of your products... 

Your products are very delicious. 

Love your jar of farts for several months but I cant get a group of 5 off on a damn digital fart. 

I don't mind paying you a little more money for a real fart in a jar. But you don't have it anymore. You got a NFT fart. And you got 4 men who weigh over 450 pounds a piece. A gimp that's a little plump. Tough gimp. And you gon' try and get us all off with a damn NFT fart? It ain't gonna work and I'm not gonna purchase your product any more, or ever again. 

I'd sure like a reply and I'd sure like you to go back to your real farts in a jar cause I'm not gonna buy it otherwise. I'll just have my own farts made like I used to back in July. 

It's not as tasty as yours is but it'll work. 

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Shayla Bastarche, of Alberta, Canada, said she saw a Craigslist ad selling Sphynx kittens for just $650. She met the seller in a gas station parking lot at night — perhaps the first clue something was off with the whole deal — and purchased two cats, one for her and one for her friend.

Eventually, the subterfuge was revealed when the cats sprouted fur two weeks later. Bastarche owns two genuine Sphynxes, and she was amazed at the lengths to which someone had gone to shave the bogus “hairless” cats.

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/watch-scammer-shaving-kittens-selling-181913119.html

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Hornius Emeritus

Hornius Emeritus 12480

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Man pays former employee with 91500 oily pennies. Some great quotes in this article:
 

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In March of last year, Flaten found 91,500 pennies in his driveway, according to the suit. "Defendants left a copy of Mr. Flaten’s paycheck with an expletive written on the outside."



 

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"Ahh, the pennies. What started out as a gotcha to a subpar ex-employee, sure got a lot of press. Unfortunately, by law, we cannot disclose his shortcomings. Let us just say that maybe he stole? Maybe he killed a dog? Maybe he killed a cat? Maybe he was lazy? Maybe he was a butcher? Maybe he liked self-gratifying himself in clients’ cars?  Whatever you want to think is your prerogative. But know that no one would go to the trouble we did to make a point without being motivated."




https://www.nbcnews.com/news/feds-sue-auto-repair-shop-paid-former-employee-pennies-rcna11339

 

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Parliament

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Authorities say 27 people were rescued from a floating chunk of ice that broke away from shore in the bay of Green Bay in eastern Wisconsin.

The Brown County Sheriff's Office said no injuries were reported in the incident that happened Saturday morning north of Green Bay, in the arm that's part of Lake Michigan.

https://www.wpr.org/27-people-rescued-floating-ice-chunk-green-bay#:~:text=Authorities say 27 people were,that's part of Lake Michigan.

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nnm

nnm 36491

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9 hours ago, Hornius Emeritus said:

Man pays former employee with 91500 oily pennies. Some great quotes in this article:
 



 




https://www.nbcnews.com/news/feds-sue-auto-repair-shop-paid-former-employee-pennies-rcna11339

 

Yeah, that guy (the employer) is a little off.  It's like he is a CR regular that just started to act out his rantings in the real world.

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Kyrie Eleison

Kyrie Eleison 9312

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https://nation.lk/online/impotent-man-s-partner-accidentally-deploys-insulation-foam-inside-his-urethra-during-sex-act-166307.html?utm_source

Impotent man's partner accidentally deploys insulation foam inside his urethra during sex act

An American man may never be able to use his penis again after his partner accidentally sprayed expanding foam up his urethra in a sex act gone wrong. 

The 45-year-old patient had to have a new opening cut between his scrotum and his anus to urinate when the foam hardened and became 'anchored' in his penis.  

Medics who treated him said he will only qualify for reconstructive surgery if he passes a psychiatric evaluation. 

The unidentified man was struggling with impotence, and had been inserting various objects into the opening of his penis during sex to stay erect.  

But things went horribly wrong during one of these sessions when the man's partner tried to use the straw of a can of weatherproofing spray to keep him firm. 

At some point the man's partner accidently hit the button on top of the can, deploying the foam inside of his penis.

The foam, normally used for home insulation, hardened and the man was left with several masses in the inside of his member and bladder. 

A CT scan revealed the masses of the hardened insulation foam sprayed into the man's penis and bladder (shown, arrows). The 45-year-old and his partner had been inserting objects into his penis in a misguided attempt to treat his erectile dysfunction but their efforts went horrifically wrong when they used the straw connected to a can of weatherproofing foam

Pictured here is the total amount of insulation foam removed from the man's bladder and penis after it was unintentionally sprayed inside him. Some of the pieces measured up to 10cm in length and up to 4.3cm in width

The pieces of foam that became trapped inside the man's penis. These pieces proved too hard to remove by pulling them out of the penis so instead doctors opted to remove them by cutting a hole in the man's perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus. Some of these pieces were  up to 16mm in length

Urologists who detailed the incident in Urology Case Reports said the man waited three weeks to seek medical attention.

He only went for treatment after finding it increasingly sore and difficult to urinate. By the time he arrived at hospital he was passing blood.

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Kyrie Eleison

Kyrie Eleison 9312

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A Man Chopped Off His Penis With Scissors in a Fit of Cannabis-Induced Psychosis, Doctors Say

A man in Thailand’s bong session went disastrously wrong, according to his doctors. In a new case report, they describe how he “completely amputated his penis” using scissors, apparently due to a rare episode of cannabis-induced psychosis. Though the man’s delusional symptoms faded after being admitted to the hospital and his injuries were treated, doctors weren’t able to reattach the lost appendage.

 

The 23-year-old man had reportedly been a regular cannabis user for the past two years but had stopped for the preceding three months. He then got back into his habit by smoking two bongs of cannabis, equivalent to two grams worth, according to the paper. Two hours later, he began to experience an unwanted erection, along with a severe and persistent sharp pain in his penis; he also reported that his glans (the tip of the penis) looked “distorted” to him. In an attempt to stop the pain, he decided to grab a pair of scissors and to “trim the penile skin several times.” Eventually, he severed his penis clean off, leaving behind an inch-long stump.

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nnm

nnm 36491

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14 hours ago, Kyrie Eleison said:

A Man Chopped Off His Penis With Scissors in a Fit of Cannabis-Induced Psychosis, Doctors Say

A man in Thailand’s bong session went disastrously wrong, according to his doctors. In a new case report, they describe how he “completely amputated his penis” using scissors, apparently due to a rare episode of cannabis-induced psychosis. Though the man’s delusional symptoms faded after being admitted to the hospital and his injuries were treated, doctors weren’t able to reattach the lost appendage.

 

The 23-year-old man had reportedly been a regular cannabis user for the past two years but had stopped for the preceding three months. He then got back into his habit by smoking two bongs of cannabis, equivalent to two grams worth, according to the paper. Two hours later, he began to experience an unwanted erection, along with a severe and persistent sharp pain in his penis; he also reported that his glans (the tip of the penis) looked “distorted” to him. In an attempt to stop the pain, he decided to grab a pair of scissors and to “trim the penile skin several times.” Eventually, he severed his penis clean off, leaving behind an inch-long stump.

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Parliament

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17 hours ago, Kyrie Eleison said:

A Man Chopped Off His Penis With Scissors in a Fit of Cannabis-Induced Psychosis, Doctors Say

A man in Thailand’s bong session went disastrously wrong, according to his doctors. In a new case report, they describe how he “completely amputated his penis” using scissors, apparently due to a rare episode of cannabis-induced psychosis. Though the man’s delusional symptoms faded after being admitted to the hospital and his injuries were treated, doctors weren’t able to reattach the lost appendage.

 

The 23-year-old man had reportedly been a regular cannabis user for the past two years but had stopped for the preceding three months. He then got back into his habit by smoking two bongs of cannabis, equivalent to two grams worth, according to the paper. Two hours later, he began to experience an unwanted erection, along with a severe and persistent sharp pain in his penis; he also reported that his glans (the tip of the penis) looked “distorted” to him. In an attempt to stop the pain, he decided to grab a pair of scissors and to “trim the penile skin several times.” Eventually, he severed his penis clean off, leaving behind an inch-long stump.

Well THAT's a mistake he'll never make again.

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nnm

nnm 36491

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9 minutes ago, huge said:

There was a lot of dark shit in that one that I don't like.

Seriously. Those are some twisted people who it appears committed horrific crimes against children. Hopefully, as both a pedo and a former cop, scumbag husband will get earthly justice meted out by his fellow inmates. 

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dingleberryswitzer

dingleberryswitzer 2724

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On 1/18/2022 at 12:26 PM, Kyrie Eleison said:

https://nation.lk/online/impotent-man-s-partner-accidentally-deploys-insulation-foam-inside-his-urethra-during-sex-act-166307.html?utm_source

Impotent man's partner accidentally deploys insulation foam inside his urethra during sex act

An American man may never be able to use his penis again after his partner accidentally sprayed expanding foam up his urethra in a sex act gone wrong. 

The 45-year-old patient had to have a new opening cut between his scrotum and his anus to urinate when the foam hardened and became 'anchored' in his penis.  

Medics who treated him said he will only qualify for reconstructive surgery if he passes a psychiatric evaluation. 

The unidentified man was struggling with impotence, and had been inserting various objects into the opening of his penis during sex to stay erect.  

But things went horribly wrong during one of these sessions when the man's partner tried to use the straw of a can of weatherproofing spray to keep him firm. 

At some point the man's partner accidently hit the button on top of the can, deploying the foam inside of his penis.

The foam, normally used for home insulation, hardened and the man was left with several masses in the inside of his member and bladder. 

A CT scan revealed the masses of the hardened insulation foam sprayed into the man's penis and bladder (shown, arrows). The 45-year-old and his partner had been inserting objects into his penis in a misguided attempt to treat his erectile dysfunction but their efforts went horrifically wrong when they used the straw connected to a can of weatherproofing foam

Pictured here is the total amount of insulation foam removed from the man's bladder and penis after it was unintentionally sprayed inside him. Some of the pieces measured up to 10cm in length and up to 4.3cm in width

The pieces of foam that became trapped inside the man's penis. These pieces proved too hard to remove by pulling them out of the penis so instead doctors opted to remove them by cutting a hole in the man's perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus. Some of these pieces were  up to 16mm in length

Urologists who detailed the incident in Urology Case Reports said the man waited three weeks to seek medical attention.

He only went for treatment after finding it increasingly sore and difficult to urinate. By the time he arrived at hospital he was passing blood.

This sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen.  The next batch of foam is going to come with a disclaimer on the can “do not insert this in any body orifice, doing so may result in bodily harm and being called a dipshit by your bros”

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