Jump to content

News stories that remind you of Surly

Longboard Horn

By Longboard Horn
in Lulz

 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 1.9k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

RPM
RPM
Armybrat
Armybrat
Parliament
Parliament

Posted Images

Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21842

Posted
Posted

Future surlyites go to kindergarten:

https://news.yahoo.com/class-kindergartners-accidentally-drank-tequila-141411019.html?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly9sLmZhY2Vib29rLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAAE0CrigGAUCR9eUeniFkcFUeY4Z8NKi7rPHLUedethdSbZ7AovaOstCJHVHV0F_WYW6oi4YbIb5vz6X--4RdEl54kI7__4scDwys6Sv6_7zprPKvMwKzqVgwEshsz0Q8yIr0sgNJwN6JTpfVn2FkpGyiy66lS0KoOZCyX5wKq8eN

Quote
INSIDER

A class of kindergartners accidentally drank tequila during snack time at a Michigan school

Yelena Dzhanova
Sat, April 16, 2022, 7:14 AM·2 min read
 
 
A margarita on the rocks with a salted rim, garnished with a lime wedge
 
Fudio/Getty Images

  • A kindergarten class in Michigan accidentally drank tequila during snack time.

  • A student brought in Jose Cuervo's ready-to-drink margaritas and the children thought it was juice.

  • One of the kids "felt woozy" and a "little dizzy" after having four or five sips, a parent said.

A kindergarten class in Michigan accidentally consumed tequila during snack time, Fox 2 Detroit reported.

One of the kids brought a bottle of ready-to-drink Jose Cuervo margaritas to Grand River Academy Livonia in her backpack, according to the news outlet.

Several students drank it. One kindergartner "felt woozy" and a "little dizzy" after having four or five sips from a Dixie cup, a parent told Fox 2 Detroit.

The kindergartners who drank the margaritas told their parents they thought it was juice. But the kindergartner who initially brought the drink in knew it was alcoholic, Fox 2 Detroit reported.

"The girl poured it in her cup and she drank it and the girl ended up telling her what it is, and she went and told the teacher there is liquor in this cup, and the teacher gave her a funny face," Dominique Zanders, a mother of one of the kindergartners, told Fox 2 Detroit.

In a statement, the school said faculty called poison control when they learned the children had been drinking margaritas, according to Fox 2 Detroit.

"While we try to keep an eye on everything our students bring to school, that's simply not possible," the school said in its statement. "It's unfortunate that these types of adult beverages can be easily mistaken for child-friendly drinks."

"I'm not sure if they are short-staffed or whatever, it shouldn't have happened," Zanders told Fox 2 Detroit.

The school said parents were notified immediately and told that their kids were okay.

Outraged parents are blaming the child's own parents.

"If your child knows what it is, nothing wrong with it. But they should know not to touch it," Alexis Smith told Fox 2 Detroit. "That it's not for kids."

"I had a small conversation with my daughter — nothing big — and she told me the girl knew it was liquor," Smith said.

Grand River Academy Livonia did not immediately respond to Insider's request to comment.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Parliament

Parliament 14255

Posted
Posted

Thinking of sending nudes that no one asked for? Think again.

The act will be illegal in Virginia starting July 1 after a recently passed law states that any adult who sends an unsolicited “intimate image” electronically to another adult could be fined $500. The bill comes after a similar bill passed in Texas in 2019.

According to the new law, an “intimate image” means a “photograph, film, video, recording, digital image or other visual reproduction of a person aged 18 or over who is in a state of undress in a manner to expose the human male or female genitalia”.

 

https://goodwordnews.com/it-is-illegal-to-send-unsolicited-nudes-to-virginia-as-of-july-1/

Link to comment
Share on other sites
'stache

'stache 21802

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Parliament said:

Thinking of sending nudes that no one asked for? Think again.

The act will be illegal in Virginia starting July 1 after a recently passed law states that any adult who sends an unsolicited “intimate image” electronically to another adult could be fined $500. The bill comes after a similar bill passed in Texas in 2019.

According to the new law, an “intimate image” means a “photograph, film, video, recording, digital image or other visual reproduction of a person aged 18 or over who is in a state of undress in a manner to expose the human male or female genitalia”.

 

https://goodwordnews.com/it-is-illegal-to-send-unsolicited-nudes-to-virginia-as-of-july-1/

So tits are still fine? I can live with that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 36360

Posted
Posted

Florida bride and caterer charged with lacing wedding food with cannabis

Hearst Television
April 21, 2022
 
   

1200x0.jpg

Two Florida women face felony charges after being accused of lacing food with marijuana at a wedding.

…

Cady says a friend at her table suspected it: "He's like, 'Are we stoned right now?' And everyone was just kind of looking around at each other laughing and we absolutely were. We were high as a kite, out of our minds."

….

https://www.chron.com/news/article/Florida-bride-and-caterer-charged-with-lacing-17116575.php

Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 36360

Posted
Posted

Maybe appropriate skill for the SB thread:

These male spiders catapult at impressive speeds to flee their mates before they get eaten.
After males of the orb-weaving spider Philoponella prominens mate with a female, they quickly launch themselves away, researchers report today (April 25, 2022) in the journal Current Biology. Using a mechanism that hadn’t been described before, the male spiders use a joint in their first pair of legs to immediately undertake a split-second catapult action, flinging themselves away from their partners at impressive speeds clocked at up to 88 centimeters per second (cm/s).

https://scitechdaily.com/male-spiders-catapult-off-their-mates-to-avoid-sexual-cannibalism-high-speed-video/amp/

Link to comment
Share on other sites
'stache

'stache 21802

Posted
Posted (edited)

JFC, one of you assholes working for Ulta marketing? Thought about putting this in the lol thread but not sure if even this place shares the depth of my dark humor. Maybe holy shit?

 

C087C117-7A0F-49C4-9288-C22AD40E0B33.jpeg

Edited by 'stache
Link to comment
Share on other sites
BearMace

BearMace 2195

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, 'stache said:

JFC, one of you assholes working for Ulta marketing? Thought about putting this in the lol thread but not sure if even this place shares the depth of my dark humor. Maybe holy shit?

 

C087C117-7A0F-49C4-9288-C22AD40E0B33.jpeg

For those like me who were unaware, Kate Spade committed suicide by hanging in 2018. Legit holy shit. 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Horn Under a Bad Sign

Horn Under a Bad Sign 20395

Posted
Posted
On 4/26/2022 at 6:36 AM, nnm said:

Maybe appropriate skill for the SB thread:

These male spiders catapult at impressive speeds to flee their mates before they get eaten.
After males of the orb-weaving spider Philoponella prominens mate with a female, they quickly launch themselves away, researchers report today (April 25, 2022) in the journal Current Biology. Using a mechanism that hadn’t been described before, the male spiders use a joint in their first pair of legs to immediately undertake a split-second catapult action, flinging themselves away from their partners at impressive speeds clocked at up to 88 centimeters per second (cm/s).

https://scitechdaily.com/male-spiders-catapult-off-their-mates-to-avoid-sexual-cannibalism-high-speed-video/amp/



Is that your tibia-metatarsus joint or are you just happy to see me?

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
crash_davis

crash_davis 23107

Posted
Posted

what's worst? child porn or peeing in customers' milkshakes? but at least they aren't serving horse meat.

https://www.thenewstribune.com/news/nation-world/national/article261464192.html

"A child porn investigation took another disgusting turn when Vancouver police officers found a video of a man peeing in milkshake mix at an Arby’s restaurant, Washington authorities reported.

The man, a night manager at the restaurant, told police he urinated in the milkshake mix for sexual gratification at least twice, Vancouver police said in a news release."

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
crash_davis

crash_davis 23107

Posted
Posted

holy shit. imagine eating mostly only potato chip sammiches for 23 years.

https://www.newsweek.com/woman-tries-first-proper-meal-after-23-years-only-eating-potato-chips-1710109

A woman who lived on a diet of cheese and onion flavored potato chip sandwiches for 23 years has finally eaten a proper meal – after being hypnotized.

Zoe Sadler, 25, of Coventry, England, has munched on Walkers potato chips in buttered white bread since she was a toddler.

She scoffed two packs of her favorite potato chips every day for more than two decades after other foods left her feeling physically sick.

Zoe Sadler, 25, has munched on Walkers potato chips in buttered white bread since she was a toddler.LEILA COKER/ZENGER

NEWSWEEK NEWSLETTER SIGN-UP >

"My mom and dad say I tried other foods as a toddler but I always turned my nose up or refused to put them in my mouth," she said.

"Apparently the only thing mom could get down me were potato chips which I used to suck until they were soft.

"I remember being at school when I was little and having potato chip sandwiches in my lunch box. They were the only thing I liked to eat.

"I usually had a bowl of dry cereal for breakfast and then a potato chip sandwich for lunch and another one for dinner.

NEWSWEEK SUBSCRIPTION OFFERS >

"Sometimes I'd try other flavor chips because the texture wouldn't bother me.

"Christmas was always hard for me because I'd never want very much to eat.

"I'd be able to have a Yorkshire pudding but never with gravy."

Zoe Sadler, 25, of Coventry, England, ate two packs of her favorite potato chips every day for more than two decades after other foods left her feeling physically sick.LEILA COKER/ZENGER

After developing multiple sclerosis three years ago, Sadler decided to improve her health and turned to hypnotherapist David Kilmurry for help.

After undergoing two two-hour hypnotherapy sessions, Sadler has been able to enjoy her first taste of fruits and vegetables alongside other foods.

She said: "I was diagnosed with MS and I just thought, I need to get healthier and feel better.

"I looked around on the internet and read some articles where David had helped other fussy eaters so I contacted him.

"We had two two-hour sessions which felt like they lasted five minutes each and after the second one I was able to try loads of different foods.

"I can't believe how nice strawberries are and I even tried a Wagamama chili squid which was really spicy.

"I'm looking forward to trying curry and lots of other different foods."

Warehouse operative Sadler, who weighs 126 pounds and fits into size 8 dresses, lives with fiancé Jason Fox, 28, a carpenter.

Sadler was also motivated to overcome her obsession with potato chip sandwiches in time to enjoy a hearty meal at her wedding next March.

Zoe Sadler, 25, of Coventry, England, has munched on Walkers potato chips in buttered white bread since she was a toddler.LEILA COKER/ZENGER

She added: "I really don't just want to be eating potato chip sandwiches on my wedding day. Now I'm looking forward to planning our wedding day menu with Jason."

London-based therapist and hypnotist David Kilmurry hypnotized Zoe after diagnosing her with Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID).

He said: "Huge credit to Zoe on her recovery; her progress has been phenomenal and has superseded my expectations.

"In a very short amount of time with myself and at home, she has been calmly eating new meals and incorporated many new high-grade fruits and vegetables to her 'safe' foods list.

"Recently diagnosed with MS, it is dangerous for her to live on a diet of just potato chip sandwiches, even if you counteract it with exercise.

"Straight after hypnotism in the chair, Zoe was open to trying new fruits and vegetables including cabbage, blueberries, and left with a pot of nuts, cranberries and several other foods which she excitedly ate."

Link to comment
Share on other sites
JSB

JSB 677

Posted
Posted
10 hours ago, RPM said:

 

CSB, when I was 7 my family stayed the night in a permanent tent you could rent in Yosemite. In the morning, I went outside and there were a few bison nearby. I walked up and pet one for a few minutes. Scared the shit out of my parents when they came out of the tent, but I thought it was pretty awesome.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...