Jump to content

News stories that remind you of Surly

Longboard Horn

By Longboard Horn
in Lulz

 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 1.9k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

RPM
RPM
Armybrat
Armybrat
Parliament
Parliament

Posted Images

crash_davis

crash_davis 23113

Posted
Posted

what's the point in living??

https://gizmodo.com/man-allergic-to-orgasms-antihistamine-1849654242

In a recent case study, doctors describe the unfortunate tale of a man who developed an allergy-like reaction to his own orgasms. The bizarre and rare affliction left him unable to pursue sexual and romantic relationships.

The condition is known as postorgasmic illness syndrome, or POIS. Sufferers (almost always men) experience symptoms similar to hay fever or a flu following ejaculation, such as fatigue, itchy eyes, stuffy or runny nose, and even memory problems. These symptoms appear after every or nearly every orgasm, usually within seconds but sometimes up to hours later, and they can last anywhere from two to seven days.

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 36415

Posted
Posted

Wonder what his Surly handle was . . . so much surly here . . .

https://nypost.com/2022/10/25/worlds-dirtiest-man-amou-haji-dead-at-94/

‘World’s dirtiest man’ Amou Haji — who last showered 60 years ago — dead at 94

An Iranian hermit who had been unofficially dubbed the “world’s dirtiest man” after not showering for some 60 years has died at age 94, state media reported.

Amou Haji – not his real name, but an endearing nickname given to elderly people – reportedly died Sunday in the village of Dejgah.

Haji, known for his grime-covered skin and matted hair, abstained from washing because he believed soap and water would make him sick. He lived in isolation for most of his life in an open brick hut, which villagers made after he started sleeping in a hole in the ground.

Locals attributed Haji’s eccentricity to “emotional setbacks” in his youth. In 2014, the Tehran Times reported that Haji also avoided fresh food, opting instead for rotted porcupine, and smoked a pipe of animal excrement. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 36415

Posted
Posted

https://nypost.com/2022/10/31/how-picking-your-nose-could-increase-risk-of-alzheimers/

How picking your nose could increase risk of Alzheimer’s and dementia

 

Don’t go digging for gold in your golden years.

New research suggests that picking your nose could increase your risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease and related dementia.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
DigglerontheHoof

DigglerontheHoof 21200

Posted
Posted
On 10/25/2022 at 12:56 PM, nnm said:

Wonder what his Surly handle was . . . so much surly here . . .

https://nypost.com/2022/10/25/worlds-dirtiest-man-amou-haji-dead-at-94/

‘World’s dirtiest man’ Amou Haji — who last showered 60 years ago — dead at 94

An Iranian hermit who had been unofficially dubbed the “world’s dirtiest man” after not showering for some 60 years has died at age 94, state media reported.

Amou Haji – not his real name, but an endearing nickname given to elderly people – reportedly died Sunday in the village of Dejgah.

Haji, known for his grime-covered skin and matted hair, abstained from washing because he believed soap and water would make him sick. He lived in isolation for most of his life in an open brick hut, which villagers made after he started sleeping in a hole in the ground.

Locals attributed Haji’s eccentricity to “emotional setbacks” in his youth. In 2014, the Tehran Times reported that Haji also avoided fresh food, opting instead for rotted porcupine, and smoked a pipe of animal excrement. 

I think I was behind this dude at a 7-11 last week.  At least it smelled like it. 

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
RPM

RPM 26321

Posted
Posted

LEXINGTON, Ky. —
A University of Kentucky student has been arrested for physically and verbally assaulting another student.

Sophia Rosing has been charged with assault, public intoxication, disorderly conduct and assault of a police officer.

Arrest records show Rosing was arrested at Boyd Hall by UK police.

She was then booked into the Fayette County Jail, initially, as Jane Doe.

sophiarosing-jpg-1667775572.jpg?resize=6

Video has since surfaced online showing Rosing attacking another student who was on duty as a desk clerk in the school dormitory at the time.

In the video, Rosing appears to attempt to run the student over with a shopping cart that was in the building lobby. Rosing is also heard saying the n-word more than 200 times.

According to her arrest citation, Rosing told police that she "has lots of money and gets special treatment." The citation also said she kicked and bit a police officer during her arrest.

UK released a statement saying they are investigating the incident. UK President Eli Capilouto says the actions in the video are "deeply antithetical to what we are and what we always want to be as a community."

The university has launched an investigation into the incident.

Rosing is set to appear in court for her arraignment Monday afternoon.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
demos

demos 3003

Posted
Posted
Sorry for partying.

Reminds me of the story about Bob Bullock. Was drunk, walked out to the parking lot, climbed in the back of a car and passed out. Lady comes out later, gets in her car and starts it up. Bob Bullock sits up in the back and says, “Hi, I’m your comptroller, Bob Bullock.”
  • Haha 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites
crash_davis

crash_davis 23113

Posted
Posted

There's wanting to bang your sister, and then there's wanting to bang your sister's dead body...

I will hold judgement until I see pics of sister, nekkid if possible.

 

https://www.jpost.com/breaking-news/article-722225

The victim said that her brother “entered my room at night, suddenly pulled out a knife and started to stab me in the head. I ran out of the room; [if not] he would have killed me – I don’t know what happened to him,” according to N12.

"[He] entered my room at night, suddenly pulled out a knife and started to stab me in the head. I ran out of the room or he would have killed me, I don't know what happened to him."

Police claim that the motive for the attempted murder was the defendant’s wish to have sex with his sister’s corpse.

The defendant said in his interrogation that he is a fan of necrophilia movies, and that is why he planned to kill his sister, according to N12.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
crash_davis

crash_davis 23113

Posted
Posted

Maneka hit Precious with a $22 meat log

https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stupid/meat-beat-plea-deal-642815?ICID

Garner reached into Jackson’s cart and removed the $22 meat log. Cops described the tube of ground beef as a “blunt object” in an arrest report (a Walmart meat log is seen in the above police photo).

Garner, investigators charged, struck Jackson “a couple of times in the face with a ten pound log of prepackaged ground beef.” Garner was arrested at the scene and a relative subsequently took custody of her son.

Jackson was not injured by the meat blows. 

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GoPokes83

GoPokes83 2240

Posted
Posted
Maneka hit Precious with a $22 meat log
https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stupid/meat-beat-plea-deal-642815?ICID
Garner reached into Jackson’s cart and removed the $22 meat log. Cops described the tube of ground beef as a “blunt object” in an arrest report (a Walmart meat log is seen in the above police photo).
Garner, investigators charged, struck Jackson “a couple of times in the face with a ten pound log of prepackaged ground beef.” Garner was arrested at the scene and a relative subsequently took custody of her son.
Jackson was not injured by the meat blows. 

10 pounds of hamburger for 22 dollars? Count me in!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Parliament

Parliament 14260

Posted
Posted

This is 30 minutes from where I grew up.  So it literally hits close to home.  Rumor is there are sixty THOUSAND of those little aholes running around.

https://www.wtol.com/article/life/animals/25-to-40-thousand-minks-released-in-van-wert-county/512-5f4cebd4-7316-4684-a3ce-47c4bea5a8a5#amp_tf=From %1%24s&aoh=16685359797391&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&ampshare=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.wtol.com%2Farticle%2Flife%2Fanimals%2F25-to-40-thousand-minks-released-in-van-wert-county%2F512-5f4cebd4-7316-4684-a3ce-47c4bea5a8a5

Screenshot_20221115-135708_Chrome.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Wally Fairway

Wally Fairway 5550

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, crash_davis said:

Maneka hit Precious with a $22 meat log

https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stupid/meat-beat-plea-deal-642815?ICID

Garner reached into Jackson’s cart and removed the $22 meat log. Cops described the tube of ground beef as a “blunt object” in an arrest report (a Walmart meat log is seen in the above police photo).

Garner, investigators charged, struck Jackson “a couple of times in the face with a ten pound log of prepackaged ground beef.” Garner was arrested at the scene and a relative subsequently took custody of her son.

Jackson was not injured by the meat blows. 

Hotdogs Throw GIF - Hotdogs Throw Face - Discover & Share GIFs

Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 36415

Posted
Posted
On 11/15/2022 at 10:36 PM, Parliament said:

This is 30 minutes from where I grew up.  So it literally hits close to home.  Rumor is there are sixty THOUSAND of those little aholes running around.

https://www.wtol.com/article/life/animals/25-to-40-thousand-minks-released-in-van-wert-county/512-5f4cebd4-7316-4684-a3ce-47c4bea5a8a5#amp_tf=From %1%24s&aoh=16685359797391&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&ampshare=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.wtol.com%2Farticle%2Flife%2Fanimals%2F25-to-40-thousand-minks-released-in-van-wert-county%2F512-5f4cebd4-7316-4684-a3ce-47c4bea5a8a5

Screenshot_20221115-135708_Chrome.jpg

big-lebowski-scared.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites
ScottS

ScottS 1062

Posted
Posted

We salute the Marine Corps vet who chugged a beer from her prosthetic leg at a Lakers game

Quote

There’s no wrong way to drink a beer, but this is just about as right a way as you can get. 

At Monday’s basketball game between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Indiana Pacers, Marine Corps veteran Annika Hutsler filled her prosthetic leg with beer and chugged it while featured on the Crypto.com Arena’s Jumbotron. 

Hutsler was, of course, named the “Fan of the Game,” as if there could possibly be any other worthy contenders. That title earned her a $100 gift card, but more importantly, she’ll probably never have to pay for another beer ever again.

A woman just took off her prosthetic leg and drank a beer out of it at the Lakers game. Needless to say, she was named the fan of the game pic.twitter.com/rFskWi6sXb

— Greg Beacham (@gregbeacham) November 29, 2022

Hutsler enlisted in the Marine Corps in 2017, training as an electronics maintenance technician at Twentynine Palms, California. She first began experiencing pain in her right leg during boot camp, although it was initially diagnosed as a stress fracture. Nine months later, though, an MRI revealed a tumor growing on her foot. 

Hutsler was transferred to the U.S. Marine Corps Wounded Warrior Regiment in July 2018, but after months of surgeries and physical therapy, she was told that her foot would have to be amputated within five to 15 years. Instead, Hutsler decided to get it over with and have the leg amputated immediately.

“I had just turned 22 at the time,” Hutsler told Marine Corps Times earlier this year. “I was like, I’m not going to waste my 20s knowing that I’m going to get my leg cut off. I’d rather be able to live a successful life with amputation than wait around for an amputation to happen.”

Hutsler medically retired in January 2020 as a lance corporal but hasn’t slowed down, competing in snowboarding, track, field, shooting, swimming, archery, wheelchair rugby, and seated volleyball at events for disabled military veterans like the Warrior Games. Now, she can add champion beer drinker to that list. 

So cheers to Annika Hutsler, who found the best possible way to watch the Lakers lose. Cheers! 

 

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Armybrat

Armybrat 40850

Posted
Posted
On 11/7/2022 at 9:15 PM, shadow_operative2.0 said:

Any word 200 times takes some commitment. 

 

Buddy walked into the wrong apartment & passed out on the chick’s living room couch back in the day. He was also awoken to the sound & feel of steel bracelets. 

I did that at the River Oaks apartments north of DKR after a complex-wide party in 1966. 
Chick woke me up around 3am by spraying Cool Whip on my face. 
Didn’t call the cops though, and I left.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
elfenix

elfenix 34243

Posted
Posted

 

FARTS SAY MORE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH THAN YOU THINK — NOW, SCIENTISTS ARE LISTENING

Quote

WHAT’S NEW — Ancalle and Maia Gatlin, an aerospace engineer at the Georgia Tech Research Institute (GTRI), created a mechanical device loaded with pumps, nozzles, and tubes meant to recreate the physics — and sounds — of human bodily function. They named it the Synthetic Human Acoustic Reproduction Testing machine (yep, S.H.A.R.T.).

S.H.A.R.T. is now preparing an AI algorithm to one day pick up on deadly diseases like cholera and stop an outbreak in its tracks, according to a presentation at last week’s American Physical Society’s annual Fluid Dynamics conference. Ancalle and Gatlin’s results haven’t yet been published in a peer-reviewed journal.

https://www.inverse.com/innovation/fart-monitoring-ai

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
RPM

RPM 26321

Posted
Posted

News stories that remind you of aggy

German police seek help in solving bull sperm heist

BERLIN (AP) — Police in western Germany are appealing for help in cracking a potentially very cold case.

Authorities say about 60 containers of bull sperm were stolen from a farm in the town of Olfen, 90 kilometers (56 miles) northeast of Cologne, late Monday or early Tuesday.

Police said in a statement Wednesday that while it’s unclear how the rustle happened, the precious cargo needs to be supercooled with liquid nitrogen at –196 Celsius degrees (–320 Fahrenheit) so it isn’t spoiled.

They are seeking tips from the public that might lead to the recovery of the sperm, which was intended for artificial insemination.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...