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2019 Texas Football Season - "#8 Go Fuck Yourself Bitch"

Xcalibur

By Xcalibur
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Junior Miller
Junior Miller

Brilliant. Sign letter of intent and transfer to Texas with zero intention of ever playing a game. Sit out year. Transfer back to USC. Sit out year. Play one bad ass season and go pro with almost zero

Junior Miller
Junior Miller

1996 and 2007 we're much different times than Jan 20, 2017 to today.  The gulf in culture is far more pronounced and cultural battle lines much more clear today.  All of you sensitive rednecks ca

Harry Ellis
Harry Ellis
SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48155

Posted
Posted

This is some grade A level knobbery. My wife had dreamed of a fall wedding much of her life, but I went ahead and was the dream crushing asshole that informed her that a fall wedding on any date, much less the Texas/OU weekend, was a non starter. Outside of the fact I wasn't having it, I certainly wasn't going to either a.) Force a large portion of my friends to miss college football or b) have a wedding where a large portion of my friends wouldn't attend. Shit, I'm still irritated that she managed to squeeze our son's birthday at the end of November. 

 

Also, speaking of knobs, Jeremy Clark is a giant one. 

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BERT

BERT 4381

Posted
Posted
12 hours ago, d.plainview872 said:

Got dammit. Recieved a wedding invitation from my cousins girlfriends family for Oct. 12. Fuck did I type that out correctly?

"What invite? I didn't receive any invite."

That's how you handle that one, rookie. 

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jimmyjazz

jimmyjazz 46111

Posted
Posted
On 8/24/2019 at 5:15 PM, BigVegasHorn26 said:

Notre Dame (can accept), Michigan (ok maybe), Ohio State (lolok), and Oregon (wtf?) were the four helmets ahead. 

Michigan is a no-brainer. 

Notre Dame's helmet is only iconic because Notre Dame's program is iconic. 

Ohio State?  It's silver with a red and white stripe.  I guess the dozens of buckeye stickers they hand out like candy help?

Oregon . . . come the fuck on.

 

I'd probably put Clemson and Georgia on that list, although UGA basically lifted it from the Green Bay Packers.  (Contrary to legend, Grambling's version came later.)

I might even consider UCLA, given how unique it is.  Or USC (California version).

 

Now, if you really want to get twisted on this, here's a Bleacher Report ranking that DOESN'T INCLUDE TEXAS IN THE TOP 25:

Some idiots try to rank helmets

 

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48155

Posted
Posted
13 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Michigan is a no-brainer. 

Notre Dame's helmet is only iconic because Notre Dame's program is iconic. 

Ohio State?  It's silver with a red and white stripe.  I guess the dozens of buckeye stickers they hand out like candy help?

Oregon . . . come the fuck on.

 

I'd probably put Clemson and Georgia on that list, although UGA basically lifted it from the Green Bay Packers.  (Contrary to legend, Grambling's version came later.)

I might even consider UCLA, given how unique it is.  Or USC (California version).

 

Now, if you really want to get twisted on this, here's a Bleacher Report ranking that DOESN'T INCLUDE TEXAS IN THE TOP 25:

Some idiots try to rank helmets

 

I think you lost everyone at Bleacher Report. You might as well have posted a link to Billy Liucci's helmet rankings on Texags.

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Ricky Butler

Ricky Butler 2732

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

This is some grade A level knobbery. My wife had dreamed of a fall wedding much of her life, but I went ahead and was the dream crushing asshole that informed her that a fall wedding on any date, much less the Texas/OU weekend, was a non starter. Outside of the fact I wasn't having it, I certainly wasn't going to either a.) Force a large portion of my friends to miss college football or b) have a wedding where a large portion of my friends wouldn't attend. Shit, I'm still irritated that she managed to squeeze our son's birthday at the end of November. 

Did you consider becoming a grown-up?

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UDontKnow

UDontKnow 10447

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

This is some grade A level knobbery. My wife had dreamed of a fall wedding much of her life, but I went ahead and was the dream crushing asshole that informed her that a fall wedding on any date, much less the Texas/OU weekend, was a non starter. Outside of the fact I wasn't having it, I certainly wasn't going to either a.) Force a large portion of my friends to miss college football or b) have a wedding where a large portion of my friends wouldn't attend. Shit, I'm still irritated that she managed to squeeze our son's birthday at the end of November. 

 

Also, speaking of knobs, Jeremy Clark is a giant one. 

Image result for silly gif

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48155

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Ricky Butler said:

Saturdays in the fall are sacred. Morning kickoffs at Iowa State...

Let me help you out. I fixed it for you.

I celebrate the entire college football catalog, sir. I've worked hard to cordon off those days with my wife, and giving up real estate you've earned is rarely a good idea.  I enjoyed having a wedding where dozens of people weren't focused on their phones or TVs at the reception.Fortunately, I have a kick-ass wife and our marriage seems to not have suffered from having a wedding in July versus October. How's your marriage? 

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Ricky Butler

Ricky Butler 2732

Posted
Posted
40 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Let me help you out. I fixed it for you.

I celebrate the entire college football catalog, sir. I've worked hard to cordon off those days with my wife, and giving up real estate you've earned is rarely a good idea.  I enjoyed having a wedding where dozens of people weren't focused on their phones or TVs at the reception.Fortunately, I have a kick-ass wife and our marriage seems to not have suffered from having a wedding in July versus October. How's your marriage? 

It was just a joke, and it's fine.

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fellside

fellside 1114

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, GotThatFire said:

“Just need QB”  might truly be the funniest thing I’ve ever read within the sports Internet world. 

TCU fans are convinced it'll be a quick bounce back because of what they did after the terrible 4-8 year in 2013.  But there are some key differences.

1. They completely changed their offense to air raid and brought in two OCs in 2014. Now they're trying to slightly adjust to a more Baylor style without changing staff.

2. Texas was dogshit the last time they turned it around. And Oklahoma was a level below what they are now.

3. They had an elite talent at qb.

Patterson's a great coach but I don't think it's a given that they compete for conference titles again this decade.  The stars aligned for them last time. 

Edited by fellside
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Katfid54

Katfid54 8635

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Ricky Butler said:

Texas/OU is sacred. Morning kickoffs at Iowa State...

 

1 hour ago, SydneyCarton said:

Let me help you out. I fixed it for you.

I celebrate the entire college football catalog, sir. I've worked hard to cordon off those days with my wife, and giving up real estate you've earned is rarely a good idea.  I enjoyed having a wedding where dozens of people weren't focused on their phones or TVs at the reception.Fortunately, I have a kick-ass wife and our marriage seems to not have suffered from having a wedding in July versus October. How's your marriage? 

 

1 hour ago, Ricky Butler said:

It was just a joke, and it's fine.

I've been too busy having sex with my supermodel wife to read any of these posts.

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sushihorn

sushihorn 3233

Posted
Posted
38 minutes ago, fellside said:

TCU fans are convinced it'll be a quick bounce back because of what they did after the terrible 4-8 year in 2013.  But there are some key differences.

1. They completely changed their offense to air raid and brought in two OCs in 2014. Now they're trying to slightly adjust to a more Baylor style without changing staff.

2. Texas was dogshit the last time they turned it around. And Oklahoma was a level below what they are now.

3. They had an elite talent at qb.

Patterson's a great coach but I don't think it's a given that they compete for conference titles again this decade.  The stars aligned for them last time. 

4.  TCU no longer has the best defensive coaching staff in the league.  He might not have the 2nd best staff now.

5.  Texas is not only on the rise.  The coaches seem to be doing a much better job of evaluating and developing recruits.  Those were two areas that TCU exploited in the past to compete with the big name programs.  That's going to be harder for them now.

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Huckleberry

Huckleberry 33081

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Ricky Butler said:

Texas/OU is sacred. Morning kickoffs at Iowa State...

It's almost like you don't realize that Saturdays move on the calendar because the number of days in the year is not divisible by 7. What was a boring road game against a hapless Rice squad in 1984 became an amazing win over Oklahoma in 2018 (October 6th).

Or that schedule formats change. What was a meaningless bye week Saturday in early September in 2002 is the biggest home game in years in 2019 (September 7th).

Wives are weird and like to celebrate anniversaries and shit. Avoiding fall weddings entirely is the only solution.

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BigHorn'13

BigHorn'13 3386

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, fellside said:

TCU fans are convinced it'll be a quick bounce back because of what they did after the terrible 4-8 year in 2013.  But there are some key differences.

1. They completely changed their offense to air raid and brought in two OCs in 2014. Now they're trying to slightly adjust to a more Baylor style without changing staff.

2. Texas was dogshit the last time they turned it around. And Oklahoma was a level below what they are now.

3. They had an elite talent at qb.

Patterson's a great coach but I don't think it's a given that they compete for conference titles again this decade.  The stars aligned for them last time. 

 

57 minutes ago, sushihorn said:

4.  TCU no longer has the best defensive coaching staff in the league.  He might not have the 2nd best staff now.

5.  Texas is not only on the rise.  The coaches seem to be doing a much better job of evaluating and developing recruits.  Those were two areas that TCU exploited in the past to compete with the big name programs.  That's going to be harder for them now.

TLDR-- they're starting Alex fucking Delton. Frog ain't winning shit

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Ricky Butler

Ricky Butler 2732

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36 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

It's almost like you don't realize that Saturdays move on the calendar because the number of days in the year is not divisible by 7. What was a boring road game against a hapless Rice squad in 1984 became an amazing win over Oklahoma in 2018 (October 6th).

Or that schedule formats change. What was a meaningless bye week Saturday in early September in 2002 is the biggest home game in years in 2019 (September 7th).

Wives are weird and like to celebrate anniversaries and shit. Avoiding fall weddings entirely is the only solution.

It was a joke, but your response is a prime example of why I couldn't resist making it.

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SydneyCarton

SydneyCarton 48155

Posted
Posted
41 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Some jackass stole all of BJ Foster's stuff

 

If I was a raging drug fiend, who HAD to pick a mark to steal some shit to pawn so I could get high...no matter how fucked up I was, I'm pretty sure I'd have picked a different mark than a University of Texas football player, much less the guy who possibly is the hardest hitter on the team. 

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