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2019 Texas Football Season - "#8 Go Fuck Yourself Bitch"

Xcalibur

By Xcalibur
in Football

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Junior Miller
Junior Miller

Brilliant. Sign letter of intent and transfer to Texas with zero intention of ever playing a game. Sit out year. Transfer back to USC. Sit out year. Play one bad ass season and go pro with almost zero

Junior Miller
Junior Miller

1996 and 2007 we're much different times than Jan 20, 2017 to today.  The gulf in culture is far more pronounced and cultural battle lines much more clear today.  All of you sensitive rednecks ca

Harry Ellis
Harry Ellis
NeverMarryAStripper

NeverMarryAStripper 21912

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Curry Shoff can watch me fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

Curry Shoff was merely pointing out the stupidity contained in Max Meyer's SI article, but I guess you can still fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

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Patricio Swayze

Patricio Swayze 17058

Posted
Posted
Curry Shoff was merely pointing out the stupidity contained in Max Meyer's SI article, but I guess you can still fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

Yeah, it’s too late. I already finished. Sometimes there is collateral damage in a war. Now I am going throw Max’s cat (we all know he is a cat person) in a wood chipper.
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Bevo

Bevo 13590

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4 minutes ago, Machinator said:

 

We were clearly one of the top 2 best teams in the Big 12 last year and the core of the team is back. At the end of the year we would have also been one of the top 2 teams in the PAC, Big10 and SEC. We will miss a corner and a LB off of last year's team so there may be some growing pains, but with the recruiting the way it has been, I think defense will be about equal to what we saw last year towards the end of the year. On offense, I think we will be better. Our line should be better, our wide receivers are at least as good and overall there is a lot of excellent experience returning. So given that we will have one of the Top 5 offenses in college football and will return a pretty strong defense that won't have many mental lapses, I see improvement from last year's team. Given that our in conference schedule will be easier than last year, I think we will see greater margins of victory and fewer losses overall. Without hiccups, LSU and OU (twice) will be the 3 games that either allow us to compete in the playoffs or send us to a non-playoff bowl game.

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closetojumping

closetojumping 62763

Posted
Posted

 

22 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Dude was probably just looking for a hot take. But I don't think it's unreasonable to see Texas finishing at 8-4 this year, which would put us right on the fringe of being ranked. 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

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satyanash

satyanash 14567

Posted
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23 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

We are all shocked that this your take. Shocked.

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

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texifornia

texifornia 57032

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

Let's be honest, satya saying the floor is still a winning record is a HUGE vote of confidence in this team.

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BigBenBamboozle

BigBenBamboozle 1957

Posted
Posted (edited)
4 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

Injuries, how do they work??  If Texas lost some combo of Sam, Shack, Shark or the top two RBs for extended time this season, it's pretty damn possible.  We won all of three games last year by more than a touchdown.  What a stupid take.. 

Edited by BigBenBamboozle
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satyanash

satyanash 14567

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

I assumed I didn't have to clarify that I wasn't including a bowl game. But sure, 9-4/8-5 depending on what happens then.

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6th Street

6th Street 6444

Posted
Posted
9 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

If we lose Sam for an extended period, 8-4 is definitely possible 

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Fico

Fico 1790

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, Machinator said:

satyanash probably predicted Texas to go 9-3 with a Holiday Bowl appearance in 2005.

It's not unreasonably, the 2004 team needed a last second field goal to beat a slow Big 10 team.  To much sunshine being pumped prior to 2005.  Our QB has only had one decent year.... /satyanashin2004...probably. 

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closetojumping

closetojumping 62763

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, BigBenBamboozle said:

Injuries, how do they work??  If Texas lost some combo of Sam, Shack, Shark or the top two RBs for extended time this season, it's pretty damn possible.  We won all of three games last year by more than a touchdown.  What a stupid take.. 

The premise was based around a final top 25 ranking. The laughably stupid take is yours, piling on top of sarvanaash’s initial handwringing dipshittery. 

5 minutes ago, satyanash said:

I assumed I didn't have to clarify that I wasn't including a bowl game. But sure, 9-4/8-5 depending on what happens then.

I’m sorry for you that basic reading skills are required to converse capably here. Context clues are indeed required. A team cannot finish a winning season with only 12 events on their record unless it faced a bowl ban (Missouri) or a natural disaster. So the premise of 8-4, while attempting to address the concept of “Texas finishes unranked”, is fucking idiotic bandwidth drain. 

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Eggo

Eggo 3978

Posted
Posted
22 minutes ago, satyanash said:

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

I appreciate your Stoic approach to this negative visualization so that you're pleasantly surprised, but maybe just shut the fuck up. 

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