There's just no stopping in the white zone...

[pokeNbeans 203]

Christ, you're as bad as your mother! 

Oh, really, Vernon! Why pretend? We both know perfectly well what it is you're talking about. You want me to have an abortion.   

 

[pokeNbeans 203]

What a pisser.

[mdmost 43016]

He's all over the place...900 feet up to 1300 feet. What an asshole!

That's Mike from Breaking Bad. 

Edited April 3, 2018 by mdmost

[Knoxtnhorn 6065]

Well let's see.  First the Earth cooled.  Then the dinosaurs came but they got too big and fat so they died.  Then the Arabs came in Mercedes Benzes....

Roger, Roger.  What's our vector, Victor?  Do we have clearance, Clarence?

[mdleast 8298]

Shiiitt

(Golly!)

[RPM 26337]

Captain Oveur, Emergency call from Mr.Hamm on line 5.

Alright, give me Hamm on five and hold the Mayo.

[RoundRobin 828]

I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defence. And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs.

The hell I don't!! LISTEN KID! I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes.

[SKJ 1311]

Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em

leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

[RPM 26337]

Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em

leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

Excuse me... I speak jive.

[South Austin 52557]

[Loose Stool 112]

Don't call me Shirley!

[pokeNbeans 203]

Shep, no! He gets so excited when new people are here.

[BigDHornfan 6549]

It looks like a big Tylenol!

[Kel Varnsen 8540]

[Dutchrudder 11150]

Cream?
No, I take it black, just like my men.

[Al Czervik 1229]

And Leon's getting larrrrrrger!

[Dutchrudder 11150]

Never read all these jive quotes before, but it's pretty entertaining. Can't imagine what the public backlash would be for a movie that wrote something like this today. Still brilliant comedy 38 years later.



First Jive Dude: Shiiiiit, maaaaan. That honky muf' be messin' mah old lady... got to be runnin' cold upside down his head, you know?

[subtitle: GOLLY, THAT WHITE FELLOW SHOULD STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE OR I WILL PUNCH HIM]

Second Jive Dude: Hey home', I can dig it. Know ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap up on you, man!

[subtitle: YES, HE IS WRONG FOR DOING THAT]

First Jive Dude: I say hey, sky... subba say I wan' see...

Second Jive Dude: Uh-huh.

First Jive Dude: ...pray to J I did the same-ol', same-ol'!

[subtitle: I KNEW A MAN IN A SIMILAR PREDICAMENT, AND HE ENDED UP BEING SORRY]

Second Jive Dude: Hey... knock a self a pro, Slick! That gray matter backlot perform us DOWN, I take TCB-in', man!

[subtitle: DON'T BE NAIVE ARTHUR. EACH OF US FACES A CLEAR MORAL CHOICE]

First Jive Dude: Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em...

First Jive Dude, Second Jive Dude: ...leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

[subtitle: EARLY TO BED, EARLY TO RISE, MAKES A MAN HEALTHY, WEALTHY AND WISE]

First Jive Dude: COL' got to be! Y'know?

[subtitle: HOW TRUE!]

First Jive Dude: Shiiiiit.

[subtitle: GOLLY]

[next2naus 439]

I served over Unger who was under Dunn.

 

Over Macho Grande? I'll never get over Macho Grande

 

Him John..BIG TREE

[pokeNbeans 203]

I want the kids in bed by nine. I want the dog fed, the yard watered, and the gate locked. And get a note to the milkman -- no more cheese!

[RPM 26337]

Oh my God! The autopilot... it's deflating!

Don't panic, on the belt line of the outomatic pilot there's a tube, now that is the manual inflation nozzle. Take it out and blow on it.

[HiggyBaby 2545]

Great interview about the jive talk scenes a few years ago.

Also, have here been any great parody comedies since Hot Shots? Pretty sure the Zuckers were in a league of their own. Brooks too.

[Dutchrudder 11150]

My favorite parody or "movie movie" since 2000 is Not Nother Teen Movie, but I saw it in the theater when I was 16. Hit all the right notes for a teenager, plus my older brother took me to see it, and was my "guardian" to get me in. Watched it again last year and lots of jokes still made me laugh out loud. Not anywhere near as good as Airplane, but it may be the best the 2000s have to offer.

 

I also really liked the first Scary Movie, but I think that's about it for the modern era.

[Hawndoh 2386]

I’m surprised no one has made a really good parody movie of super hero/comic book stuff since the rise of marvel movies  

I guess CGI budgets would be too much for a comedy. 

Edited April 4, 2018 by Hawndoh

[Duckman 82]

Nervous?

Yes

First time?

No, I've been nervous lots of times.

[mdmost 43016]

Captain, how soon can you land?

I can't tell.

You can tell me, I'm a doctor.

No, I mean I'm just not sure.

Can you take a guess?

Not for another 2 hours.

You can't take a guess for another 2 hours?

[retread 2951]

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue
 

[TheStoicPaisano 9923]

Now pinch-hitting for Pedro Borbon, Manny Mota...

Mota...

Mota...

[Loose Stool 112]

Ever been in a Turkish prison?

[Surly Bevo 25119]

My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.

When will you be back?

I can't tell you that. It's classified.