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Barry Switzer is on the other side of the bar.

drifter379

By drifter379
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Ignatius

Ignatius 4125

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Posted

I’ll PayPal you the price of 4 peach schnapps shots and a 100% tip for the bartender and $100 for you to defray your current tab if you send them to him, get the bartender to say “This is from SurlyHorns.com” and post the video. 

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Braff Zacklin

Braff Zacklin 13675

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36 minutes ago, Fondren & Main said:

Go talk to him you fucking weirdo.

 

19 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

I’d enjoy getting drunk with him. I picture him telling some pretty good stories. 

He's pretty approachable, from what I heard.

Buddy at a newspaper I used to work at many years ago was out drinking when a colleague called him up and told him to get over to ____ ASAP. Buddy shows up and, lo and behold, it's Switzer. They throw back a few and buddy works up the nerve to ask for an autograph. Switzer grabs a napkin and writes,

Quote

To Lance,

Fuck you!

Barry Switzer

Buddy kept the napkin as a souvenir and was always happy to show it off and retell the story. Seemed plausible.

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

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28 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

I’d enjoy getting drunk with him. I picture him telling some pretty good stories. 

 

21 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

You're probably right.  

The guy is fucking great socially and isn't gonna turn into some dipshit 'durrrrr, Texas sucks durrrrr'.  Say hi, and shoot the shit. 

Doubt any of you would ever admit it, but you'd love to bullshit and have beers with Barry over Mack.  Maybe milk and cookies with Sally...

 

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

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7 minutes ago, Braff Zacklin said:

 

He's pretty approachable, from what I heard.

Buddy at a newspaper I used to work at many years ago was out drinking when a colleague called him up and told him to get over to ____ ASAP. Buddy shows up and, lo and behold, it's Switzer. They throw back a few and buddy works up the nerve to ask for an autograph. Switzer grabs a napkin and writes,

Buddy kept the napkin as a souvenir and was always happy to show it off and retell the story. Seemed plausible.

I rest my case. 

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Surly Bevo

Surly Bevo 25655

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2 minutes ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Doubt any of you would ever admit it, but you'd love to bullshit and have beers with Barry over Mack.  Maybe milk and cookies with Sally...

Mack would have orange slices though...which might come in handy depending on what you're drinking

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Landomatic

Landomatic 3813

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I’ve met him out in Dallas twice.  He was pretty damn cool both times.  Very approachable.  One time I was with an ousux buddy and we saw him during Texas ou at ZaZa.  We were all pretty fucked up and he did a couple shots with us and hung out for a while.  Eventually, his PR handler had to come escort him outa there.  Other time was at the bar at Nick and Sams.  Just standing around drinking and shootin the shit with him and his people.  He’d have probably hung out with us all night if our table hadn’t been ready.  Fucker loves to drink from my two experiences.  I wanted to hate him but he was a pretty cool old bastard.

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

Posted
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Just now, Surly Bevo said:

Mack would have orange slices though...which might come in handy depending on what you're drinking

Meh, damn blue moon.  Get me some local swill if it has to be beer.  Otherwise let's stick to bourbon, scotch, whiskey...not necessarily in that order. 

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Landomatic

Landomatic 3813

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5 minutes ago, ChiTownDoc said:

The guy is fucking great socially and isn't gonna turn into some dipshit 'durrrrr, Texas sucks durrrrr'.  Say hi, and shoot the shit. 

Doubt any of you would ever admit it, but you'd love to bullshit and have beers with Barry over Mack.  Maybe milk and cookies with Sally...

 

This ^

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ztejas

ztejas 44114

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44 minutes ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Meh, damn blue moon.  Get me some local swill if it has to be beer.  Otherwise let's stick to bourbon, scotch, whiskey...not necessarily in that order. 

Blue moon fucking sucks and if you serve it with an orange slice you might as well call an Uber and go peg your boyfriend at that point in the night. 

If I ever meet Switzer in a public setting I don't want to remember anything after the 3rd drink

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 55824

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

I’d enjoy getting drunk with him. I picture him telling some pretty good stories. 

No shit.  I'd buy him a shot of whisky and ask him about Jerry Jones.  

Yeah, he's Satan, but don't you think Satan has better stories than Jesus?

Edited by Beau Vine
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closetojumping

closetojumping 65246

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What a bunch of fucking benedict arnold dipshits on this thread. The fucking guy runs Texas down on television to this day. He drove the best coach Texas has ever seen to an early retirement due to his rampant fucking cheating. He ran the most outlaw piece of shit program in the history of the sport until Penn State and Baylor. He legitimately brought the institution of college football down 2-3 notches by cheapening it with his cheating, whether with his OC’s wife or with players from Texas or simply by lowclassing the fucking rank and file of the hallowed halls of the game. 

That considered, wait until he goes to the restroom, follow him into a stall with one of the cocktail drink swords you’re currently picking your teeth with, cut his throat from ear to ear with it and write “OU Sucks” on the walls and mirrors with his gushing blood. Fuck. It’s like amateur hour in here. 

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

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6 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

What a bunch of fucking benedict arnold dipshits on this thread. The fucking guy runs Texas down on television to this day. He drove the best coach Texas has ever seen to an early retirement due to his rampant fucking cheating. He ran the most outlaw piece of shit program in the history of the sport until Penn State and Baylor. He legitimately brought the institution of college football down 2-3 notches by cheapening it with his cheating, whether with his OC’s wife or with players from Texas or simply by lowclassing the fucking rank and file of the hallowed halls of the game. 

That considered, wait until he goes to the restroom, follow him into a stall with one of the cocktail drink swords you’re currently picking your teeth with, cut his throat from ear to ear with it and write “OU Sucks” on the walls and mirrors with his gushing blood. Fuck. It’s like amateur hour in here. 

Yeah, I'm sure everyone here agrees.  But have a couple drinks and hear some stories first.  

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closetojumping

closetojumping 65246

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Just now, ChiTownDoc said:

Yeah, I'm sure everyone here agrees.  But have a couple drinks and hear some stories first.  

I’ve partied with plenty of colorful people and know how to have a fucking crazy time myself. You’re a biased dipshit on this and your opinion is both predictable and banal. Barry Switzer can die of gonorhea and rot in hell, and you are free to follow him there and join that party. I don’t need to wrestle pigs in order to say I’ve had a hell of a time. 

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

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12 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I’ve partied with plenty of colorful people and know how to have a fucking crazy time myself. You’re a biased dipshit on this and your opinion is both predictable and banal. Barry Switzer can die of gonorhea and rot in hell, and you are free to follow him there and join that party. I don’t need to wrestle pigs in order to say I’ve had a hell of a time. 

Nah, I've had a beer with a few Texas legends in my time.  They were good people and pretty chill.  If you get this bent out of shape in 'real life' over sharing drinks with a rival I worry for  your mental health...then again your username is 'close to jumping'.  Anyways, you got me, touche. 

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drifter379

drifter379 1116

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That considered, wait until he goes to the restroom, follow him into a stall with one of the cocktail drink swords you’re currently picking your teeth with, cut his throat from ear to ear with it and write “OU Sucks” on the walls and mirrors with his gushing blood. Fuck. It’s like amateur hour in here. 



I should have gone with this option.
After I got my drink I flashed him the hook ‘em. He winked and smiled and will live another day.
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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21323

Posted
Posted (edited)
2 minutes ago, markstanco said:
3 hours ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:
I’d enjoy getting drunk with him. I picture him telling some pretty good stories. 

I hate ND but I sat at a table with lou Holtz for 90 minutes once and I loved listening to his stories.

WHY DIDNT YOU STABBED HIM 

DURRRRRRR

Edited by ChiTownDoc
Oh, and how the fuck did you understand him?
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