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Going on my first cruise


Mo Horn

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38 minutes ago, BearSchlong said:

I hope she's not shopping.  She's probably bringing you home one of those oversized Invicta "divers" watches.

The only tolerable place on that ship is one of those half shell cabana lounges on the Serenity deck.

Also, tell her to go to the steakhouse and get the "art at the table" desert, it's mildly amusing.

I tried to be a cruise fan, gave it my honest effort, but failed.

Bahahaha, when my stepdad passed away, my mom had about 35 watches to divvy up between his 2 daughters, his grandson, me and my nephew.

I'd say 25 of them were those shitty Invicta watches.  Hard pass. 

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1 hour ago, Moby Ric said:

She is shopping on the boat today but she won't buy me some shitty watch.  She knows my tastes pretty well.  

You realize at the end of the cruise you're going to get a huge charge on your credit card for add on expenses. It's so easy to just swipe you ship ID and not think that there's real money tired to every swipe, especially on your first cruise. I think there are some bankruptcy lawyers here who can be of service. 

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11 minutes ago, Mo Horn said:

You realize at the end of the cruise you're going to get a huge charge on your credit card for add on expenses. It's so easy to just swipe you ship ID and not think that there's real money tired to every swipe, especially on your first cruise. I think there are some bankruptcy lawyers here who can be of service. 

Not worried about any of that.  

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8 hours ago, Mo Horn said:

You realize at the end of the cruise you're going to get a huge charge on your credit card for add on expenses. It's so easy to just swipe you ship ID and not think that there's real money tired to every swipe, especially on your first cruise. I think there are some bankruptcy lawyers here who can be of service. 

We were on a cruise in Norway on Holland America) that sailed from Rotterdam. The last night we were in the piano bar and a die starts screaming in half dutch half English about his closing statement. He had a $9400 bill from his extendd family traveling with him he was unaware of. 

(Side note: cruising Norway is an amazing experience)

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So no real report today.  They had afternoon tea, then went to an art auction.  I told her good luck at dinner tonight, she responded with they are not sitting at the table tonight.  They are doing a captain dinner thing and if that did not work out she was doing buffet.  They were in the room by 9:30.  Typing this I just realized I may be the proud owner of some new cruise art,  paging mitchcumstien.

Meanwhile my job is taking care of the MIL's cat.  It is very particular, and mad the MIL is gone.

edit.  Fix the shitty spell check on your site fat chewy.

Edited by Moby Ric
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7 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

gosh, hope I run into them. I love cruise ship people. They aren't like Walmart people, at all.

Think you have missed the point.  Wife is not a cruise person, and is not enjoying this trip.  Part of the reason is the low brow people on the boat.

In Cozumel today.  Should be interesting.

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So they shopped in town today and apperantly the locals were willing to haggle a good amount on their stuff.  So I can only imagine what has been purchased.  She texted me that the family they had issues with the first night was right behind them coming into dinner, and are currently sitting next to them.  Same guy is giving that table the same treatment she got the other night.  I guess when you are on the Spirit Airlines of the sea you just have to suffer.  We will see if there is more to report later.

On my end, fuck the cat.  I get over there to feed it and change the liter.  Well the cat shit all over the bed and the house smells like well cat shit.  JFC, I clean it all up and wash some stuff.  And the cat is just sitting there looking stoned with a no fucks given look.  The cat is pissed.  

Edited by Moby Ric
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I get the cruise hate.  

1. It starts with the cruise line you choose. Choose wisely and it's a fun, no need for a car  trip.

2. Choose poorly, and you're on a Carnival lines boat. They're kinda hit  or miss on their quality.

3.  Always select a balcony stateroom

4. Get the all you can drink ticket, and tip out the first day.

5. Don't think you're better than everybody around you, and just enjoy, meeting cool, and bizarre people all week.

6.  Always get back to the ship before it leaves for the next port.

7.  Just have fun.

8. Oh yeah make up a good biography about yourself being a marine biologist or professional snake wrangler.

Edited by Onboard 2.0
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2 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I get the cruise hate.  

1. It starts with the cruise line you choose. Choose wisely and it's a fun, no need for a car  trip.

2. Choose poorly, and you're on a Carnival lines boat.(not even gonna give them the courtesy or respect of calling it a ship line.

3.  Always select a balcony stateroom

4. Get the all you can drink ticket, and tip out the first day.

5. Don't think you're better than everybody around you, and just enjoy, meeting cool, and bizarre people all week.

6.  Always get back to the ship before it leaves for the next port.

7.  Just have fun.

8. Oh yeah make up a good biography about yourself being a marine biologist or professional snake wrangler.

Username checks out.  

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34 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I get the cruise hate.  

1. It starts with the cruise line you choose. Choose wisely and it's a fun, no need for a car  trip.

2. Choose poorly, and you're on a Carnival lines boat.(not even gonna give them the courtesy or respect of calling it a ship line.

3.  Always select a balcony stateroom

4. Get the all you can drink ticket, and tip out the first day.

5. Don't think you're better than everybody around you, and just enjoy, meeting cool, and bizarre people all week.

6.  Always get back to the ship before it leaves for the next port.

7.  Just have fun.

8. Oh yeah make up a good biography about yourself being a marine biologist or professional snake wrangler.

Good suggestions. The only cruise I've been on was with Carnival because we went with others who cruise at least 2 times a year. They have major status and got us great rates, and some extra perks. I loved it and understand the allure of cruising. I also get why some hate it, and why Carnival gets the bad rap. So if we were to book another one solo, what's the best line? I'm interested in food, onboard entrainment (couldn't care less about the gambling) and excursions. I guess the answer may be different depending on where we're cruising. 

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17 minutes ago, Mo Horn said:

Good suggestions. The only cruise I've been on was with Carnival because we went with others who cruise at least 2 times a year. They have major status and got us great rates, and some extra perks. I loved it and understand the allure of cruising. I also get why some hate it, and why Carnival gets the bad rap. So if we were to book another one solo, what's the best line? I'm interested in food, onboard entrainment (couldn't care less about the gambling) and excursions. I guess the answer may be different depending on where we're cruising. 

Yeah carnival gets a bad rap and deservedly so depending on the ship, and when you go. 

We did one of the carnival cruises with our kids, and didn't really have any major complaints, but had similar perks packages y'all had it sounds like. You always wanna go a bit upscale if you can to get the best experience if possible.

Holland America is nice (from our 2x experience ), also some of the smaller lines that do European canal barge cruises, and the mediteanaran coast are pretty nice.

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Docked, off the boat and on the way home.  But dinner last night had yet another show. Apparently dude did not get something he wanted threw a fit and then threw his plate off the table.  It hit another couple and covered them in food.  The cruise people had to ask them to move to another table.

Home note, MIL's cat did not shit everywhere today.  

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We did a big family inside passage Alaskan cruise from Vancouver to Seward AK on Celebrity a few years ago.  Spectacular scenery that would be difficult to see any other way.  Port stops in Ketchikan, Juneau, Hoonah and Skagway.  I would actually consider doing that again someday, but the idea of a traditional Caribbean cruise makes me wretch.

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2 hours ago, Moby Ric said:

Docked, off the boat and on the way home.  But dinner last night had yet another show. Apparently dude did not get something he wanted threw a fit and then threw his plate off the table.  It hit another couple and covered them in food.  The cruise people had to ask them to move to another table.

Home note, MIL's cat did not shit everywhere today.  

Wow, that would be a first for any restatuent setting ship or not for me.

Unfortunate for your family 

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Wife, her mom and godmother did Boston to Quebec City on Norwegian Gem, aft suite with a butler and a smaller dining room that seats about 50. Almost 4K/person but excursions and booze included. Arcadia National Park, Peggy's Cove, Halifax, Prince Edward Island, places like that. During peak fall leaf season.

Cruises like that are just an efficient way so see pretty places.

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Good suggestions. The only cruise I've been on was with Carnival because we went with others who cruise at least 2 times a year. They have major status and got us great rates, and some extra perks. I loved it and understand the allure of cruising. I also get why some hate it, and why Carnival gets the bad rap. So if we were to book another one solo, what's the best line? I'm interested in food, onboard entrainment (couldn't care less about the gambling) and excursions. I guess the answer may be different depending on where we're cruising. 
We have enjoyed Royal Caribbean line.
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5 hours ago, Moby Ric said:

Docked, off the boat and on the way home.  But dinner last night had yet another show. Apparently dude did not get something he wanted threw a fit and then threw his plate off the table.  It hit another couple and covered them in food.  The cruise people had to ask them to move to another table.

 

Was he Slow Donnie?

 

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13 hours ago, SurlyGator said:

We did a big family inside passage Alaskan cruise from Vancouver to Seward AK on Celebrity a few years ago.  Spectacular scenery that would be difficult to see any other way.  Port stops in Ketchikan, Juneau, Hoonah and Skagway.  I would actually consider doing that again someday, but the idea of a traditional Caribbean cruise makes me wretch.

My MIL is a big cruise person and we’ve done the Alaska cruise with her twice (Celebrity and Princess). I don’t remember much about the Princess cruise because we had two kids under 4 at the time so we didn’t do too much other than watch the kids.

Did the Celebrity cruise in 2019 and had a blast. Kids were old enough to roam the ship with their cousins while we worked out, got massages, or hung around the pool (or bars) during the days at sea. There was some pretty good live entertainment at night and the excursions were fun. We had balconies so it was great to sit in quiet and check out the scenery. 

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So now that she is home I have more to tell.  The dinner guy who was just out of control apparently was all over the ship pissing everyone off.  They couldn't shake this guy.  They get off the elevator he is there, they go to the show, he is there announcing to the theatre his arrival.  Up in the adult only area where people go for the quiet he is screaming his displeasure about things.  4,000 people on a ship and he is everywhere.

Food was a step above Country Kitchen Buffet in her opinion.  Drinks were meh.  She was so ready to get home and felt that every time she sat to relax it was time to get up and do something.  Pool was insufferable with the crowds etc.  She compared it to being trapped in an RV on vacation.  

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It's been a long time (20+ yrs) since I went on a cruise, but I took a Royal Caribbean 3 day out of Miami. The food was finominole and they had a dress code. The room made an RV look like a Presidential palace.

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It's been a long time (20+ yrs) since I went on a cruise, but I took a Royal Caribbean 3 day out of Miami. The food was finominole and they had a dress code. The room made an RV look like a Presidential palace.
Did you get an interior room? Ours has been with a balcony, which makes the room seem bigger. Plus it has a little seating area between the bathroom and bed. We were on Harmony of the Seas.
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  • 9 months later...

Read most of this stuff.  The only Surly rule I will intentionally violate is the anti-Carnival rule: 

The wife has allegedly wanted to go on a cruise forever.  She visited the Navy son a couple of years ago in Hawaii and was allowed on his boat for a very short 2-3 hour ride.  It's evidently much smaller than a cruise ship and she got seasick.  

Since we both have full-time jobs(my Alaska teacher pay is much higher than her Texas clerical pay)  and the kids are gone, I offered the following strategy:  I pay for the cruise, port taxes, fees, and gratuities for both of us and one soda package;  she pays for any excursions and upgrades in dining and any b.s. souvenirs. 

What I didn't tell her at first was I priced in the Spa Cloud 9 package from Carnival. This is a multi-tiered strategy...1. keep her from getting bored, sitting in the sun and burning all day 2. give her something she really likes 3. give me a chance to take a nice long, comfortable shower in the spa area, as opposed to the tiny little shower in the stateroom.

She didn't like the idea.  The princess is holding out for not paying anything. Not gonna happen.  I can find someone else to go if it comes down to it.  Since my birthday is in late December, I have now postponed my plan until 2023.  So here is the strategy: 

1. The cruise is a birthday present to myself-go and pay for the little stuff or don't--your choice. 

2. I am paying for a Cloud 9 Spa package balcony room....and still getting a pretty good deal. 

3.  Because I am used to living in a very isolated part of the world and not having access to something as simple as a glass of orange juice, I will cash in big-time on the soda package.  My research indicates:  

a. four kinds of juice available 

b. a glass of soda or juice is allowed every 10 minutes

c. there is a track to run/walk around the ship

d. by the time I sail, the soda package will probably be $15 per day.  

Walk around the track, get a juice, walk around the track, Get a soda, ad infinitum, or ad nauseam! whichever comes first.  Since I am an early riser, I will break even by 10:00 a.m. every day.  Shoot I will even throw in a glass of water every third drink as well.  Guaranteed I will be the first passenger to find all of the convenient restrooms.  No internet, no problem.  Re: the Wal-Mart factor, I can ignore anybody and anything.  Kind of like ignoring a Native drunken Alaskan in a dry village.  Just part of the scenery.   

The cool thing about Carnival is how they have stepped up their food game.  By December 23 we will have the current stars, Guy Fieri's Burger joint no extra charge, the Mexican food place no extra charge, etc.  and by December 23 we will most likely have Shaq's Chicken joint - no extra charge.

The days of settling for a buffet are long gone.  I've been watching the Youtubes recently and the trend in food is the upscale, upsell.  Just something to be aware of.  

I've done so much research on this stuff I am sure it will all change by 23 and I will have to re-learn it.  No problem.  I have all the time in the world in rural northern Alaska.  Since 2019, I completed two Master's Degrees to get to the top of the salary chart, so something needs to fill the time.  About 80% of the time I really get off on the boredom, as crazy as it sounds.  I have been visiting the wife in Texas for 10 days now, and wow! the commute stress of driving the crowded highways vs. the commute stress of walking 200 yards in -40 degrees is an absolute no-contest.  For next year, I got permission and already moved closer to school, so when I go back in late July, my commute will be cut in half, down to 100 yards.

Questions:  

1. For a first-timer - 5 day, 6 day, does it matter? I know not to get anything less than a 5 day. 

2.  I am not checking luggage.  After four years in Alaska, that is the one thing that carries over into real life.  If you can help it, keep your luggage with you as much as possible. I'm taking a carryon or 2 with a 12 pack of Dr. Pepper or Coke in it.  Try for early check-in or does it matter?  

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2 hours ago, JGrayDBU said:

Read most of this stuff.  The only Surly rule I will intentionally violate is the anti-Carnival rule: 

The wife has allegedly wanted to go on a cruise forever.  She visited the Navy son a couple of years ago in Hawaii and was allowed on his boat for a very short 2-3 hour ride.  It's evidently much smaller than a cruise ship and she got seasick.  

Since we both have full-time jobs(my Alaska teacher pay is much higher than her Texas clerical pay)  and the kids are gone, I offered the following strategy:  I pay for the cruise, port taxes, fees, and gratuities for both of us and one soda package;  she pays for any excursions and upgrades in dining and any b.s. souvenirs. 

What I didn't tell her at first was I priced in the Spa Cloud 9 package from Carnival. This is a multi-tiered strategy...1. keep her from getting bored, sitting in the sun and burning all day 2. give her something she really likes 3. give me a chance to take a nice long, comfortable shower in the spa area, as opposed to the tiny little shower in the stateroom.

She didn't like the idea.  The princess is holding out for not paying anything. Not gonna happen.  I can find someone else to go if it comes down to it.  Since my birthday is in late December, I have now postponed my plan until 2023.  So here is the strategy: 

1. The cruise is a birthday present to myself-go and pay for the little stuff or don't--your choice. 

2. I am paying for a Cloud 9 Spa package balcony room....and still getting a pretty good deal. 

3.  Because I am used to living in a very isolated part of the world and not having access to something as simple as a glass of orange juice, I will cash in big-time on the soda package.  My research indicates:  

a. four kinds of juice available 

b. a glass of soda or juice is allowed every 10 minutes

c. there is a track to run/walk around the ship

d. by the time I sail, the soda package will probably be $15 per day.  

Walk around the track, get a juice, walk around the track, Get a soda, ad infinitum, or ad nauseam! whichever comes first.  Since I am an early riser, I will break even by 10:00 a.m. every day.  Shoot I will even throw in a glass of water every third drink as well.  Guaranteed I will be the first passenger to find all of the convenient restrooms.  No internet, no problem.  Re: the Wal-Mart factor, I can ignore anybody and anything.  Kind of like ignoring a Native drunken Alaskan in a dry village.  Just part of the scenery.   

The cool thing about Carnival is how they have stepped up their food game.  By December 23 we will have the current stars, Guy Fieri's Burger joint no extra charge, the Mexican food place no extra charge, etc.  and by December 23 we will most likely have Shaq's Chicken joint - no extra charge.

The days of settling for a buffet are long gone.  I've been watching the Youtubes recently and the trend in food is the upscale, upsell.  Just something to be aware of.  

I've done so much research on this stuff I am sure it will all change by 23 and I will have to re-learn it.  No problem.  I have all the time in the world in rural northern Alaska.  Since 2019, I completed two Master's Degrees to get to the top of the salary chart, so something needs to fill the time.  About 80% of the time I really get off on the boredom, as crazy as it sounds.  I have been visiting the wife in Texas for 10 days now, and wow! the commute stress of driving the crowded highways vs. the commute stress of walking 200 yards in -40 degrees is an absolute no-contest.  For next year, I got permission and already moved closer to school, so when I go back in late July, my commute will be cut in half, down to 100 yards.

Questions:  

1. For a first-timer - 5 day, 6 day, does it matter? I know not to get anything less than a 5 day. 

2.  I am not checking luggage.  After four years in Alaska, that is the one thing that carries over into real life.  If you can help it, keep your luggage with you as much as possible. I'm taking a carryon or 2 with a 12 pack of Dr. Pepper or Coke in it.  Try for early check-in or does it matter?  

Just took a Carnival cruise a few weeks ago out of San Fran to Ensenada. It was my second cruise. First one was Royal Caribbean. RC had much better food. The Carnival buffet was just horrible all the way around. But the pizza place that stayed open to very late was very good. Guy Fieri’s hamburger place was also good, surprisingly since they had all these cooked patties sitting there as they took they took care of the line of people. Thought the burgers would be cold but they werent.

We don’t do the excursions. When we get to Mexico just head to el centro and walk around and look for some good cheap eats and drinks.

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18 minutes ago, RPM said:

They charge for food and drinks on cruises now? Last one I took was RC in the 90's but the only thing I paid extra for was premium booze.

They don’t charge for buffet or regular dining room. They charge for a few specialty restaurants and cokes and booze. They let you bring a 12 pack of cokes and a I believe a bottle of wine on.

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  • 5 months later...

Necro bump:

Just returned from my first cruise; Mexican Riviera (Puerto Vallarta, Cabo, and Ensenada) out of San Pedro on Celebrity.

I fucking LOVED it.  The weather was perfect, the ship was immaculate...everywhere you looked, somebody was cleaning something.  We had a balcony stateroom, and it was absolutely fine.  It was twice the size of the hotel room we had in Tokyo. 

The food was terrific. We bought a dining package and upgraded to the premium restaurants 2 nights. 

The booze was flowing (bought the drink package).  I drank like a fucking fish. 

Didn't do any excursions, because we've done so many mexican vacations, but we did go ashore at each port and do our own thing.   Actually witnessed the start of the Baja 1000 in Ensenada, which was a sight to see. 

Lots of great entertainment aboard. 

The crew was amazing.  They hailed from 62 Countries, and all were pleasant and fun to talk to.  

We hit the buffet a time or two at off-hours and found it to be really good.  Easily better than any Vegas buffet that I've seen.  There was a poolside burger joint that made a solid burger. 

I've got no issues at all with Celebrity, and would recommend them.  Yes, there were some fat, ugly passengers poolside, but there were some smoke shows too.  And very few children aboard, which was nice. 

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12 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

I enjoy traveling on a ship, period. 

I used to enjoy getting shitfaced.

I still like traveling on a ship.  Fuck all the fatsos and stupid games.

I participated in 1 "stupid game".  Name that tune, Beatles Edition.  I fucking destroyed the joint.

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We took our kids on a Disney Cruise in October.  Ship was very clean and had lot of fun options for all of us. Booze options were pretty decent and not too expensive IMO compared to other cruise lines I have been on.   

The poolside options were great for munchies.  Disney's island was really cool.  I streamed the OU beatdown while hammering back beers on the beach that day. 

We didn't go anywhere near the pools that allowed kids as they were crammed.

Our kids, 7 and 10, wanted to spend most of their time in the kids club once they found out how much fun it was. 

We docked one day next to a Carnival ship and it was like a Cadillac parked next to a Malibu.  Even kids noticed how filthy the Carnival ship looked and that it was full of whales.  

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  • 2 months later...

Well, we pulled the trigger.  I have gone on 3 Carnival cruises (2 with my grandmother when she retired, 1 for a work event).  All 3 were fun in their own way, but nothing I would ever do again.  We have resisted cruising for 25 years.

Virgin has changed the equation.  We dug into what they are doing and became intrigued.  It's adults only.   This not only means no endless games of Marco Polo in the pools, but the entire experience is geared to adults:  adult humor, adult language, cocktail forward, no Broadway shows, adult and sex friendly shows. The ice cream bar is called "lick me till I scream".   While the cruises are "vanilla" and mostly populated by straight couples and straight singles (they have solo cabins), the experience is tailored to be very welcoming for everyone (LGBT, all gender identifications, curious, etc.), including the upside pineapple lifestyle crowd.  Apparently, it is not for the socially conservative. This all sounds perfect for us (same sex couple).

The food is set up around specialty restaurants that seem to be very good (all included with no extra charge) with no formal dining hall or buffets.  There are no old fashioned "activities" (although there is drag bingo), no silly art auctions or photographers on board, and you have to sorta find your way through the day with all the fun stuff they are doing around the ship and at night, the clubs rock.  The staff is paid well and is very happy to provide good service.

This is all from reviews I have read.  We are doing a Mediterranean cruise out of Barcelona September (including a night in Ibiza).  I'll report back then.  They are sailing out of Florida now for Caribbean cruises. 

 

 

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41 minutes ago, DFWTexEx said:

Well, we pulled the trigger.  I have gone on 3 Carnival cruises (2 with my grandmother when she retired, 1 for a work event).  All 3 were fun in their own way, but nothing I would ever do again.  We have resisted cruising for 25 years.

Virgin has changed the equation.  We dug into what they are doing and became intrigued.  It's adults only.   This not only means no endless games of Marco Polo in the pools, but the entire experience is geared to adults:  adult humor, adult language, cocktail forward, no Broadway shows, adult and sex friendly shows. The ice cream bar is called "lick me till I scream".   While the cruises are "vanilla" and mostly populated by straight couples and straight singles (they have solo cabins), the experience is tailored to be very welcoming for everyone (LGBT, all gender identifications, curious, etc.), including the upside pineapple lifestyle crowd.  Apparently, it is not for the socially conservative. This all sounds perfect for us (same sex couple).

The food is set up around specialty restaurants that seem to be very good (all included with no extra charge) with no formal dining hall or buffets.  There are no old fashioned "activities" (although there is drag bingo), no silly art auctions or photographers on board, and you have to sorta find your way through the day with all the fun stuff they are doing around the ship and at night, the clubs rock.  The staff is paid well and is very happy to provide good service.

This is all from reviews I have read.  We are doing a Mediterranean cruise out of Barcelona September (including a night in Ibiza).  I'll report back then.  They are sailing out of Florida now for Caribbean cruises. 

 

 

Celebrity had daily organized meetups both for LGBTQ and for "Friends of Bill W"

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