What would you do different if you could do it again

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

4 day work week, bro. That's what you were thinking.

Well, it was a 9/80 schedule which I was working at the other place. Significant pay increase though, but I would take a cut to find something not so shitty.

[Sbbruin 21900]

10 hours ago, Baboontyme said:

I would have dropped out of college and become a carnie. I'd have to start from the bottom but the goal would be the Tilt-a-whirl. 

[Sbbruin 21900]

I had a classmate in graduate school approach me about working for this coffee company that was going to be opening a bunch of stores in California as soon as I graduated.  The rub was you had to work in one of the stores for like 6 months to a year before getting a "corporate" position.  I said "fuck that."  It may have been short-sighted.  They had something like 120 stores at the time.  They have a few more than that now.  I might have told myself not to dismiss it so quickly.  

[Buffsoldier 1895]

I wouldn't let myself suffer and be abused, lied to, stolen from, manipulated and disrespected for 5 straight years while she was on her alcoholic and pill-addicted rampage. 

This is not to say I wouldn't have helped, I wouldn't have loved, and I wouldn't have tried my damndest to bring her out.  Of course I would have.  But I'd have recognized a year, maybe eighteen months or so in that it wasn't going to change, or at least it wasn't going to change with me in the picture, and I'd have pulled myself and my daughter out of that descent into hell.  My daughter would've only been 2-2 1/2 then, and I'd have saved her from going through that at the worst possible time (according to the Parental Responsibility Evaluator age 5-7 is the worst time for a child to go through a divorce, psychologically speaking), and just as importantly, I'd have saved myself 3 or so years that I can never get back.

Or at least I'd tell my 20 yr old self to look out for that at age 40 or so....

[El Diablo 4232]

1 hour ago, Sbbruin said:

If a carny ever ran for President, I'd vote for him. But a carny isn't going to run for President because it's against their honor code and an insult to their integrity. 

[WhatTheBuck 28811]

I could write a book. I could probably fill several chapters on opportunities with young women that were staring me in the face but I was too young and naive to see them. That includes what had to be an open invitation to have sex with two women at the same time. 

I wish I would've written down the bread recipe from the bakery I worked at. I wish I had purchased a copy of The Joy of Cooking when I was 20 and gotten interested in cooking earlier. 

I wish I had gone to see Frank Zappa in 1988. I figured I'd have plenty of other chances to see him. I didn't know that would be his last rock 'n' roll tour. 

I should've taken Spanish in college instead of French. I've retained some French, but I took Spanish in high school and it would've been easier and a lot more productive to take it in college. 

One little change I'd make if I had it do over again, one that would've probably had a huge impact, would be to go back to when I was 18 and filling out paperwork at freshman orientation. Regarding dorm room assignments, I was given three choices: A) I am a non-smoker and I don't want smoking in my room; B) I am a smoker and I plan on smoking in my room; C) I'm not a smoker but I don't care if people smoke in my room. I wasn't a smoker but I thought I'd be open minded so I chose option C. I wanted to meet and get to know a wide variety of people and option A seemed exclusionary. Silly me. I got placed in a room with three smokers. By the end of the year, I was a smoker too. 

Edited May 14, 2019 by WhatTheBuck

[Helobious 9467]

I told this story once on TOS, but I watched one of my closest childhood friends lose his way in life. He lived 2 houses down from me since third grade. We played outside together, went to pool parties, had sleepovers, played a fuckload of video games, all of it. He’d always been a super nice kid to everyone, a fantastic baseball player. No one ever made me feel more comfortable on the mound as he did when he was behind the plate. 

Looking back, he had a far worse home life than I realized (and that almost always catches up to you eventually). Finally freshman year of high school he starts hanging out with a rougher crowd. Stopped playing sports, grew a little more distant, got into drugs. I had a very “you do you” attitude towards it all. We stayed casual friends but I completely stopped hanging out with him, even though he tried reaching out to me several times. He dropped out and got his GED, joined the marines but got kicked out of basic after he got caught with  drugs of some kind. He came back to Texas, and about 3 weeks later he overdosed on heroin and died. 18 years old.

I think I shouldn’t have given up on him so quick, and that things could’ve turned out different. I wish I could go back and help him.

[Okie State 3848]

I would have pushed myself more in school and the first five to ten years of my career. I cruised through those years without really challenging myself too much.

[Bill Brasky 1465]

I wish I would have made more of an effort with regards to my personal finances, instead of just partying it all away.   Even saving 100 dollars a month starting at 20 years old would have added up to quite a bit.   

[tx 3 putt 77587]

I wish I would have hit my second golf shot the first time around 

[drewlaws 126]

I wish I would have bought a house in central Austin in 2009-2010 rather than get a new car I didn’t really need. A house was a stretch budget wise at the time. That cost me at least a couple hundred grand worth of extra equity to start my 30s with.

[52-80 19271]

12 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

I had a classmate in graduate school approach me about working for this coffee company that was going to be opening a bunch of stores in California as soon as I graduated.  The rub was you had to work in one of the stores for like 6 months to a year before getting a "corporate" position.  I said "fuck that."  It may have been short-sighted.  They had something like 120 stores at the time.  They have a few more than that now.  I might have told myself not to dismiss it so quickly.  

you fucked up.  couldve been assistant to the regional barista now.

[52-80 19271]

9 hours ago, Helobious said:

No one ever made me feel more comfortable on the mound as he did when he was behind the plate. 

 

Sounds kinky.

[Nueces River Rat 5554]

Someone mentioned going back and buying  Apple stock...  

I was 20 in Jan 1992  and stock price was at  $2.31 per share in Jan of that year.   Damn missed opportunity there.

Microsoft was trading at $2.50 per share.   It has split a thousand times since then too.

 

So yea I would pick me up a few shares of each for sure.

[TwiceHorn 31587]

22 hours ago, Nueces River Rat said:

I guess if I could go back 27 years and some change,  I'd put my mindset on focusing on my math and science skills  a tad more than I did back then.   But I guess I'd have to go back even a few years before then such as 7th or 8th grade and pound that into my young skull.  I mean I know of people who were slackers when it came to math and science in middle and high school who turned out to be good engineers, doctors, and other professions were you need good math and science skills to at least progress through a degree program at reputable institution of higher learning.   Of course like most jobs in the real world, you will learn most of what makes you good eventually by getting your hands dirty and not sitting at a desk calculating away at some formula to come to a solution.  But none the less, something clicked in their heads and they got after it which means I certainly could have done the same damn thing.   

But why would I focus on the math and science thing?   I love architecture and if I had to do a career rewind, that's a path I would take.   I've always admired folks I know in the field who can conceptualize things and make them happen.  Plus they  acquire knowledge  which helps them with their everyday tasks such as fixing things around the house,  etc.   I'm a damn idiot when it comes to doing some of those things and either have to read up or ask someone to help.  Or worse yet pay someone to do it.  

The other thing, I would have told my lazy ass to continue working out after high school   instead of lying around after class or work and getting fat along with eating/ and overdrinking crap.    About five years ago, I said enough of that sort of lifestyle and started hitting the weights and cardio hard and it's paid off.  I'm probably in the best shape since  my high school athletic days and I'm certainly surpassing  weightlifting benchmarks I probably wouldn't have even gotten close to in high school.   I can't  imagine what kind of shape I'd be in even if I did half the regimen I do know all through my twenties and into the thirties.   

I'll make you feel a little better on the architecture thing.  First, some may not realize it, but it is a very rigorous degree.  Arguably (barely), the toughest major at UT.  Second, it requires a rather peculiar mix of scientific/mathematical aptitude and artistic talent.  Third, it can be a brutal career path that starts very slow (and low-paid) and may never pick up speed.

Finally, like art, you can have all the technical proficiency in the world, and a good bit of artistic talent, but if people don't like (or don't see) your designs, you won't enjoy the level of success you might envision.

Quote

I've always admired folks I know in the field who can conceptualize things and make them happen.  Plus they  acquire knowledge  which helps them with their everyday tasks such as fixing things around the house,  etc.   I'm a damn idiot when it comes to doing some of those things and either have to read up or ask someone to help.  Or worse yet pay someone to do it.  

This applies to most engineering disciplines as well.  And some artsy things like industrial design, even interior design and landscape architecture.

I thought I wanted to be an architect for a while, spoke to some architects, and realized a lot of the foregoing and majored in mechanical engineering.  No ragrets.

I recently had a meeting with a guy that is an architecture graduate from Tech (yeah, yeah).  He's an oilfield welder now.  Still designing and creating stuff, mostly tools for oilfield welders.

Edited May 14, 2019 by TwiceHorn

[South Austin 52636]

4 minutes ago, TwiceHorn said:

I'll make you feel a little better on the architecture thing.  First, some may not realize it, but it is a very rigorous degree.  Arguably (barely), the toughest major at UT.  Second, it requires a rather peculiar mix of scientific/mathematical aptitude and artistic talent.  Third, it can be a brutal career path that starts very slow (and low-paid) and may never pick up speed.

Finally, like art, you can have all the technical proficiency in the world, and a good bit of artistic talent, but if people don't like (or don't see) your designs, you won't enjoy the level of success you might envision.

This is everything I've heard about architecture.  Seems like becoming a physician is an easier career path.

Besides, why be an architect when you can be a city planner?

[Guest Lobo]

Very true about architecture.  I wanted to be one up until high school when I learned maths were not my strongsuit.  Perhaps that's why I always identified with Larry David/George Costanza/Art Vandelay.  But the architect/planning firm i work very closely with, he tells me time and time again...there is no money left in being an architect.  Unless you can in on the development side.  So they're left to pimp themselves out, forego their full freight and get a piece of the development side instead.  It's been lucrative, but a tough row to hoe.  

Plus, have you looked at new buildings lately?  Nobody is paying for design anymore.  They ain't exactly paying for functionality either.  So here we are.  

[Moby Ric 2058]

3 hours ago, Nueces River Rat said:

Someone mentioned going back and buying  Apple stock...  

I was 20 in Jan 1992  and stock price was at  $2.31 per share in Jan of that year.   Damn missed opportunity there.

Microsoft was trading at $2.50 per share.   It has split a thousand times since then too.

 

So yea I would pick me up a few shares of each for sure.

This.  Very much this.  

[chesthair 231]

-learned to speak Mexican

-learned to play the harmonica.  

 

thats about it.  

[Sbbruin 21900]

29 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Very true about architecture.  I wanted to be one up until high school when I learned maths were not my strongsuit.  Perhaps that's why I always identified with Larry David/George Costanza/Art Vandelay.  But the architect/planning firm i work very closely with, he tells me time and time again...there is no money left in being an architect.  Unless you can in on the development side.  So they're left to pimp themselves out, forego their full freight and get a piece of the development side instead.  It's been lucrative, but a tough row to hoe.  

Plus, have you looked at new buildings lately?  Nobody is paying for design anymore.  They ain't exactly paying for functionality either.  So here we are.  

I can confirm the in my biz (commercial RE) architects are wildly underpaid for the quality of their work.  

[Chewbacca 7787]

21 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

I can confirm the in my biz (commercial RE) architects are wildly underpaid for the quality of their work.  

Not on the apartment side, they're not.  Rates have gone up by 4x since 2010 for similar projects.

[Helobious 9467]

5 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Sounds kinky.

Debated putting “no homo” after that, but I foolishly over-estimated the maturity of the readers. I still thought it was the least gay (nttawwt) way to say “he was a great catcher”.

[El Diablo 4232]

Isn't our West Virginia poster, Whitman, an architect? Might be a related field.

[52-80 19271]

4 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

Finally, like art, you can have all the technical proficiency in the world, and a good bit of artistic talent, but if people don't like (or don't see) your designs, you won't enjoy the level of success you might envision.

easy - just make a whole bunch of buildings that look like boobs. 

[UTPhil2006 3818]

On 5/12/2019 at 7:58 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I can’t think of anything I’d say

User name does not check out.

[Mole 4333]

Besides giving stock tips or giving myself a sports almanac, I’d let myself know that it’s going to be ok. We all have some dark times and simply having reassurance that there will be joy in the future means a lot.

[Nueces River Rat 5554]

4 minutes ago, Mole said:

Besides giving stock tips or giving myself a sports almanac, I’d let myself know that it’s going to be ok. We all have some dark times and simply having reassurance that there will be joy in the future means a lot.

 

[Nueces River Rat 5554]

7 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

I'll make you feel a little better on the architecture thing.  First, some may not realize it, but it is a very rigorous degree.  Arguably (barely), the toughest major at UT.  Second, it requires a rather peculiar mix of scientific/mathematical aptitude and artistic talent.  Third, it can be a brutal career path that starts very slow (and low-paid) and may never pick up speed.

Finally, like art, you can have all the technical proficiency in the world, and a good bit of artistic talent, but if people don't like (or don't see) your designs, you won't enjoy the level of success you might envision.

This applies to most engineering disciplines as well.  And some artsy things like industrial design, even interior design and landscape architecture.

I thought I wanted to be an architect for a while, spoke to some architects, and realized a lot of the foregoing and majored in mechanical engineering.  No ragrets.

I recently had a meeting with a guy that is an architecture graduate from Tech (yeah, yeah).  He's an oilfield welder now.  Still designing and creating stuff, mostly tools for oilfield welders.

To clarify, I'm very happy where I am in life.  Really I wouldn't really want to go back and change much of anything career/early adulthood  wise, save I might have been a little more frugal with spending decisions, but what's done is done.  I'm starting a new business right now and hopefully it will be something I can expand and ride with for the next 20 years or so.    

My other career option until marriage and helping open up a family business with her side of the family was law.   My dad was a  Lawyer( went to UT law)  and after  he passed away,   a few of his former colleagues took me under their wings so I looked up to them as father figures.  I was gung ho law and even after we opened the business,   I left to door open for a few years that we'd bank some cash and then make a go for it.   But then we had our first kid and it was no turning back with the business  and quite frankly we did real well financially, so going to law school looked less appealing.  

That Oil Field welder from Tech is probably making some good coin, especially if he's working in the Permian area.   I know some guys down here when the Eagle Ford was going full blast who were making some serious money on top of their day jobs at one of the refineries.   Some of those guys were trying to get their final years end for retirement so they could go full time freelancer with a rig or start their own companies.   They are in such demand, the local high schools are graduating kids with certificates in welding they get in conjunction with the local community college and they have jobs ready to go if they are not working already. 

[luke duke 6414]

This. Looking back I’m pretty sure that I could have pulled a couple of 3ways with a girl that I dated when I was 20. I was too clueless to even think about at the time.

[tbone_ 14198]

I would have learned to kick motherfuckers to the curb quicker that weren’t adding anything but drama and negativity to my journey.

I would have gone with a technical degree vs business.

I would try to be less of a dick.

[Okie State 3848]

I would have learned to kick motherfuckers to the curb quicker that weren’t adding anything but drama and negativity to my journey.

I would have gone with a technical degree vs business.

I would try to be less of a dick.

I absolutely would have done technical instead of business.

[T’Boo Ted Marshall 2740]

Get a Finance degree instead of Mgmt.

[BearSchlong 8125]

20 hours ago, Mole said:

Besides giving stock tips or giving myself a sports almanac, I’d let myself know that it’s going to be ok. We all have some dark times and simply having reassurance that there will be joy in the future means a lot.

This is the best answer I've seen so far.  I'd have sat my 20 year old still drinking alcoholic self down and told him "there's a God, and you're not him.  You're no better or worse than anybody else, you're just a guy, and the sooner you figure out that humility and acceptance sure beat your unrealistically high expectations on the world then the sooner you can get on with the business of really enjoying life.  Also, you should take every single opportunity to go fishing because in 2017-2019 it's going to rain a fuck ton and the fresh water is going fuck with the speck fishing."

 

"Also in fall 2010 when you're in the death rattle of active alcoholism, you're going to discover a website called shaggy bevo, do not register for this site, because it's going to cost you about $200k in lost productivity.  Just because Baylor is getting a little better at football does not mean you should create a username BearSchlong and try to troll SkipperJ. Also, don't give Baylor any money, you're going to need it to pay your own kid's tuition.  Be happy when Baylor is 7-5 and realize that though Briles is a good coach, he's going to attract some bad dudes to the program in an effort to raise that ceiling."

"Also, take all that time you're going to spend watching porn and go kayaking/golfing/mountain biking instead"

 

Edited May 15, 2019 by BearSchlong

[Knoxtnhorn 6067]

Easy.  I'd go back to West Campus, mid-90's, and refrain from alienating and/or screwing over some really good friends.

When I got to UT, I looked like I was 12.  All of my friends looked out for me as if I was a little brother.  Cool to a point, but I couldn't get a woman if my life depended on it.  I looked - and probably acted - like a little kid. 

Sometime around my soph year, I grew up.  Maybe I no longer looked 12, whatever.  I couldn't fend off the ladies.  I had a couple of threesomes.  One night I slept with 3 different women between about 10pm and 2am.  So what's the problem you might ask?  I ended up screwing over (no pun) some really good friends because I couldn't keep my pants zipped.  I'm talking a couple of friends' girlfriends, sisters, even an aunt at one point.  I also screwed over a damn near perfect girlfriend twice.  I was gifted a 2nd chance with her and f'd that up as well.

To this day, I'd cower in shame if I happened to cross paths with any of those I knew during this time frame.  Thing is, I was known as the "sweet guy that was extremely loyal and always there for his friends" until I went on a rampage.  Since then, I've been loyal almost to a fault.  

Just 2 years of b.s. behavior has left a black mark on my life.  I think about it almost every day.  I can't even blame on drinking or drugs because I did neither.  Just stupid and selfish behavior that hurt a lot of people.

[Beau Vine 54471]

1 hour ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Easy.  I'd go back to West Campus, mid-90's, and refrain from alienating and/or screwing over some really good friends.

When I got to UT, I looked like I was 12.  All of my friends looked out for me as if I was a little brother.  Cool to a point, but I couldn't get a woman if my life depended on it.  I looked - and probably acted - like a little kid. 

Sometime around my soph year, I grew up.  Maybe I no longer looked 12, whatever.  I couldn't fend off the ladies.  I had a couple of threesomes.  One night I slept with 3 different women between about 10pm and 2am.  So what's the problem you might ask?  I ended up screwing over (no pun) some really good friends because I couldn't keep my pants zipped.  I'm talking a couple of friends' girlfriends, sisters, even an aunt at one point.  I also screwed over a damn near perfect girlfriend twice.  I was gifted a 2nd chance with her and f'd that up as well.

 

YOU FUCKED YOUR AUNT?!?!?  That's not cool, man.

[Billy Pilgrim 1985]

On 5/13/2019 at 6:45 PM, Sbbruin said:

I had a classmate in graduate school approach me about working for this coffee company that was going to be opening a bunch of stores in California as soon as I graduated.  The rub was you had to work in one of the stores for like 6 months to a year before getting a "corporate" position.  I said "fuck that."  It may have been short-sighted.  They had something like 120 stores at the time.  They have a few more than that now.  I might have told myself not to dismiss it so quickly.  

This reads like a Paul Harvey bit 

[zork 629]

I never would have gotten into the Woo elevator, evar.

[South Austin 52636]

1 hour ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Easy.  I'd go back to West Campus, mid-90's, and refrain from alienating and/or screwing over some really good friends.

When I got to UT, I looked like I was 12.  All of my friends looked out for me as if I was a little brother.  Cool to a point, but I couldn't get a woman if my life depended on it.  I looked - and probably acted - like a little kid. 

Sometime around my soph year, I grew up.  Maybe I no longer looked 12, whatever.  I couldn't fend off the ladies.  I had a couple of threesomes.  One night I slept with 3 different women between about 10pm and 2am.  So what's the problem you might ask?  I ended up screwing over (no pun) some really good friends because I couldn't keep my pants zipped.  I'm talking a couple of friends' girlfriends, sisters, even an aunt at one point.  I also screwed over a damn near perfect girlfriend twice.  I was gifted a 2nd chance with her and f'd that up as well.

To this day, I'd cower in shame if I happened to cross paths with any of those I knew during this time frame.  Thing is, I was known as the "sweet guy that was extremely loyal and always there for his friends" until I went on a rampage.  Since then, I've been loyal almost to a fault.  

Just 2 years of b.s. behavior has left a black mark on my life.  I think about it almost every day.  I can't even blame on drinking or drugs because I did neither.  Just stupid and selfish behavior that hurt a lot of people.

I dunno.  All that fucking sounds kinda cool. 

[tbone_ 14198]

Yea you should probably just get over all that by now.

[Knoxtnhorn 6067]

I'm a teacher and mentor to lots of kids today.  The behavior I exhibited is quite shameful to my current state of being.

[South Austin 52636]

11 minutes ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

I'm a teacher and mentor to lots of kids today.  The behavior I exhibited is quite shameful to my current state of being.

It's only shameful if they know about it.

[Guest]

So some of you folks actually believe young-you would listen to old-you if old-you went back and spoke with young-you?

That assumes you had no positive counsel or mentor-ship happening when you went through the drill the first time.

 

Sorry, i see this answer as a cop-out.  I took the thread to mean what would you change if you had the chance; not that your hard-headed ass would listen the second time.

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4979]

On 5/12/2019 at 5:39 PM, freyguy said:

I just realized that's the dad from American Housewife.

[Sbbruin 21900]

3 hours ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

This reads like a Paul Harvey bit 

And now you know the rest of the story...

[tbone_ 14198]

And now you know the rest of the story...

My old man had a similar situation with Chili’s in Dallas back in the day.

[Beau Vine 54471]

1 hour ago, slorch said:

So some of you folks actually believe young-you would listen to old-you if old-you went back and spoke with young-you?

That assumes you had no positive counsel or mentor-ship happening when you went through the drill the first time.

 

Sorry, i see this answer as a cop-out.  I took the thread to mean what would you change if you had the chance; not that your hard-headed ass would listen the second time.

 Dwayne? this is a voice of experience talking, fuck a lot of women, kid, I have no reason to lie to you. Not just one, a lotta women.

[Gil Bang 26053]

On 5/14/2019 at 9:11 AM, Sbbruin said:

I can confirm the in my biz (commercial RE) architects are wildly underpaid for the quality of their work.  

Medical guys charge a fucking fortune. 

[BearSchlong 8125]

1 hour ago, slorch said:

So some of you folks actually believe young-you would listen to old-you if old-you went back and spoke with young-you?

Sorry, i see this answer as a cop-out.  I took the thread to mean what would you change if you had the chance; not that your hard-headed ass would listen the second time.

Of course young me wouldn't listen to old me, I'd be like "shut up old man I know what I'm doing"  That's why this is a fantasy thread.

What would your answer be, Slorch?

[tbone_ 14198]

Can I just go back to my 21yo self but bring my 50yo brain with me?

 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

3 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Can I just go back to my 21yo self but bring my 50yo brain with me?

 

I would like my 21yo knees and back, please.