Shit my co-worker said

[Bevo 13560]

One of my employees today played Chris Stapleton - Tennessee Whiskey on her computer. Another middle aged female employee listens to the song and towards the end says "I love that song. Is that Marvin Gaye singing?"

Edited May 23, 2019 by Bevo

[Lerka Lerka 1086]

Do you by chance work with CooterBrown?

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

I overheard one of my direct reports today telling another one that "they eat nutra in Louisiana."

I'm pretty sure she meant nutria, but it wasn't worth pursuing. For a wide variety of reasons.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

47 minutes ago, Lerka Lerka said:

Do you by chance work with CooterBrown?

No and dirt bike wouldn't say that.

[Fuck Tim Beck 3815]

Women huh? I'm shocked! 

[Upgrayedd 5810]

I’m reporting you to HR

[TexArcher 37761]

3 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

I overheard one of my direct reports today telling another one that "they eat nutra in Louisiana."

I'm pretty sure she meant nutria, but it wasn't worth pursuing. For a wide variety of reasons.

You people

[elfenix 34221]

 

[HoustonHorn 1062]

I overheard one of my direct reports today telling another one that "they eat nutra in Louisiana."
I'm pretty sure she meant nutria, but it wasn't worth pursuing. For a wide variety of reasons.

I love those Nutriagrain bars. Tasty.

[mulletpelini 5210]

Nutriasystem would work great for these fat music geniuses you work with

[Reagan1k 3024]

14 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

I overheard one of my direct reports today telling another one that "they eat nutra in Louisiana."

I'm pretty sure she meant nutria, but it wasn't worth pursuing. For a wide variety of reasons.

Well, unless she's got a PHD in some field relevant to the swamp rats......I'm going to side with her.

Where I'm from, no one but an academic would pronounce the "ia"  .  Whether they're in the wild or in a gumbo......the I is silent. 

[crash_davis 23096]

46 minutes ago, Reagan1k said:

Well, unless she's got a PHD in some field relevant to the swamp rats......I'm going to side with her.

Where I'm from, no one but an academic would pronounce the "ia"  .  Whether they're in the wild or in a gumbo......the I is silent. 

where the hell are you from?

[Bevo 13560]

Some years ago a friend of mine at a major Houston law firm took her assistant to Chuy's. There was a painting at the bar of a dog and above it it said Chihuahua Bar. The assistant goes what a cute name for a bar, "The chi whoAaah whoAaah bar".

[Lerka Lerka 1086]

1 hour ago, Reagan1k said:

Well, unless she's got a PHD in some field relevant to the swamp rats......I'm going to side with her.

Where I'm from, no one but an academic would pronounce the "ia"  .  Whether they're in the wild or in a gumbo......the I is silent. 

 

16 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

where the hell are you from?

Highland Park?

[El Diablo 4232]

Overheard one (female) co-worker telling another (female) co-worker "Yes, there's two kinds of eye doctors. There's the ones you get glasses from and then there's the ones that look into your eyes".

[lateshow 1304]

1 hour ago, Reagan1k said:

Well, unless she's got a PHD in some field relevant to the swamp rats......I'm going to side with her.

Where I'm from, no one but an academic would pronounce the "ia"  .  Whether they're in the wild or in a gumbo......the I is silent. 

This is correct. 

[ztejas 43411]

Had an open meeting with AT&T recently as we are considering switching phone/internet providers. 

Girl in the meeting kept saying "land line" 

Not the worst of faux pas but there were 5 AT&T reps in the room, one of whom answered a question by saying "so, when you have a LAN line"

Almost felt like I needed to apologize. 

[JSB 677]

I now work in a pretty open concept space. The only thing between my "office" and the cubical farm is shade thing similar to those sun shade things you put on the rear windows of a car for the kiddos. I overheard one of my billing guys last week saying, "I have a really large bladder, which makes me pretty efficient" 

[Guest]

How would one know if their bladder is larger or smaller than average?

Maybe the fucker doesn’t drink enough...then he’s a health risk.  

Self- diagnosed efficiency denied.

[Reagan1k 3024]

1 hour ago, crash_davis said:

where the hell are you from?

Where they have nutria....and pronounce it nutra.

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

2 minutes ago, Reagan1k said:

Where they have nutria....and pronounce it nutra.

Nutraland?

[El Diablo 4232]

I've always pronounced it with the "ia". Probably because they weren't common in Central Texas as far as I know, at least when I was a kid and we were just going by the way it's spelled. We had dictionaries and could read and write though so....

[txhorns 2409]

I have a lot of Zoom meetings for work as I work remotely.  Had a girl in a meeting earlier this week sitting on her couch with her laundry drying behind her.  Her bras and panties were all in full view.  She was petting her cat.  The cat was brought up and the girl said, "my kitty likes to be rubbed." 

[huge 3793]

Wait.

I need a ruling here.

Louisiana boys and girls say NUTRA instead of NUTRIA?

Because I live in Houston and we have these rat beavers too but I need to know the proper coonass configuration

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

So swamp people can't even pronounce their own stew meat correctly? I have one more reason to get down on the prie-dieu and thank God I'm not from Louisiana. 

[Homesickhorn 2202]

Well, unless she's got a PHD in some field relevant to the swamp rats......I'm going to side with her.
Where I'm from, no one but an academic would pronounce the "ia"  .  Whether they're in the wild or in a gumbo......the I is silent. 

I always thought they were called “Shoot that mother fucker”.

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

3 minutes ago, Homesickhorn said:

I always thought they were called “Shoot that mother fucker”.

*Choot

[Homesickhorn 2202]

*Choot

*Choot-dat-mawdafuckuh?

[G650 14229]

We have plenty of nutria around these parts, and the all have an i in their name.

 

Where's the dirtbike posts anyway. This thread is useless.

[msucolt45 4052]

Used to live in Lake Charles and every year Cameron Louisiana held a “fur festival” and it was for nutria. God awful beasts, they will show their orange “beaver teeth” and come at you! Very aggressive varmit that needs to be put down!

[El Diablo 4232]

45 minutes ago, Walden Ponderer said:

So swamp people can't even pronounce their own stew meat correctly? I have one more reason to get down on the prie-dieu and thank God I'm not from Louisiana. 

What we have heh iz failyuh to enunciate. Some men you jest cain't reach.

[Felix 607]

A guy on my team said he he got into an argument that almost resulted in fisty cups.

[elfenix 34221]

3 hours ago, ztejas said:

Had an open meeting with AT&T recently as we are considering switching phone/internet providers. 

Girl in the meeting kept saying "land line" 

Not the worst of faux pas but there were 5 AT&T reps in the room, one of whom answered a question by saying "so, when you have a LAN line"

Almost felt like I needed to apologize. 

wait, what?

[ztejas 43411]

1 hour ago, txhorns said:

I have a lot of Zoom meetings for work as I work remotely.  Had a girl in a meeting earlier this week sitting on her couch with her laundry drying behind her.  Her bras and panties were all in full view.  She was petting her cat.  The cat was brought up and the girl said, "my kitty likes to be rubbed." 

Dear penthouse forum?

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

1 hour ago, txhorns said:

I have a lot of Zoom meetings for work as I work remotely.  Had a girl in a meeting earlier this week sitting on her couch with her laundry drying behind her.  Her bras and panties were all in full view.  She was petting her cat.  The cat was brought up and the girl said, "my kitty likes to be rubbed." 

We've started using Google Chat for video meetings, and yeah, you get all kinds of weirdness from some of the younger work at home crowd. Lava lamps, cats, dirty laundry, a machine shop, etc. My favorite, though, is the guy with a still.

[BB65 478]

The coonasses and rednecks I know never say just nutra it is always nutra rat

[El Diablo 4232]

31 minutes ago, BB65 said:

The coonasses and rednecks I know never say just nutra it is always nutra rat

Sounds healthier that way, they can charge more.

[elfenix 34221]

2 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

We've started using Google Chat for video meetings, and yeah, you get all kinds of weirdness from some of the younger work at home crowd. Lava lamps, cats, dirty laundry, a machine shop, etc. My favorite, though, is the guy with a still.

respek

[Prepuce of Doom 21052]

5 hours ago, Reagan1k said:

Where they have nutria....and pronounce it nutra.

What's up, Dan Marino? 

[Armybrat 40820]

5 hours ago, El Diablo said:

I've always pronounced it with the "ia". Probably because they weren't common in Central Texas as far as I know, at least when I was a kid and we were just going by the way it's spelled. We had dictionaries and could read and write though so....

We observed one crawling out of Town Lake while we were eating dinner at the Magic Time Machine years ago. Biggest damn rat I ever saw.

[Deej 76751]

5 hours ago, El Diablo said:

I've always pronounced it with the "ia". Probably because they weren't common in Central Texas as far as I know, at least when I was a kid and we were just going by the way it's spelled. We had dictionaries and could read and write though so....

Weren't common? I've killed enough on Inks Lake in my life to keep George Constanza in hats forever.

 

[El Diablo 4232]

A small group migrated into a lake a friend of the family had. This was north of Waco between the Dallas Hwy and FM933 around 1972 or so. I would pester the shit out of 'em with my pellet gun. They eventually moved on after the dam broke and the water level dropped to just a couple feet and it turned into a turtle pond. That was my only experience with the nasty little fucks.

New-tree-uh. That's what his mama call him, that's what I'ma call him. 

[Dbeasy 15040]

Had an open meeting with AT&T recently as we are considering switching phone/internet providers. 
Girl in the meeting kept saying "land line" 
Not the worst of faux pas but there were 5 AT&T reps in the room, one of whom answered a question by saying "so, when you have a LAN line"
Almost felt like I needed to apologize. 

Dude. Are you sure you understood the conversation? In telecom wired lines are called landlines.

[fattyflattie 4639]

6 hours ago, msucolt45 said:

Used to live in Lake Charles and every year Cameron Louisiana held a “fur festival” and it was for nutria. God awful beasts, they will show their orange “beaver teeth” and come at you! Very aggressive varmit that needs to be put down!

A friend of mine’s wife won the pageant one year. We call her Miss Nutra.  She’s hot and cool af, as you would expect a Miss Nutra to be. 

[mulletpelini 5210]

My fucking computer is not showing the Miss Nutra pics

[Scheiss Meister 8407]

Years ago I worked with a crusty old fart.  One night, in the middle of our supper break, he just rared back and said, "Boys, they ain't but two kinds of pussy: good old bigguns, and big old gooduns."

[retsevlys 408]

Nu-tree-uh here, but back on track. 

Less than a year ago I needed an employee to scan and email me something.  She has a Brother multifunction printer/fax/scanner.  She told me she didn't think she would be able to because the printer ribbon needed replacing.

Regardless of the obvious stupid shit, I haven't used a printer with a ribbon since like '95.  

And no, you don't want pics.

edit: she now has two printers, the multi and a Lexmark printer only.  I was in her office and needed her to make a copy of something for me.  The Brother's "printer ribbon" is still out(because she fucking prints everything and the drum and toner cartridge are expensive to replace).  She couldn't make me a copy.  Maybe you could scan it to yourself and print it on the printer you have that does work?  Bitch is fucking stupid.

 

Edited May 24, 2019 by retsevlys

[fattyflattie 4639]

40 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

My fucking computer is not showing the Miss Nutra pics

Those are going to be hard to come by. @Llano Estacado can vouch tho (I know that doesn’t help) 

[lockport 55]

22 hours ago, txhorns said:

I have a lot of Zoom meetings for work as I work remotely.  Had a girl in a meeting earlier this week sitting on her couch with her laundry drying behind her.  Her bras and panties were all in full view.  She was petting her cat.  The cat was brought up and the girl said, "my kitty likes to be rubbed." 

I don't see a problem here

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

Holy shit. "Nutria Queen" is a real thing.